Some concerns regarding sexual contact.

[Worried 84]

Please give me some clarity and support over a possible sexual experience and possible exposure that's giving me some anxiety at the moment. I'm a gay male and haven't had sexual contact in almost a year until recently. Me and a old time friend were having quite a few glasses of red wine together throughout the day. We were both quite jolly and drunk by the time I asked him to drop me off at home.

On our way home he asked if I would give him a " blowjob' or oral sex as we call it in better terms. I declined as I still had a healing ulcer patch in the corner of my mouth on the front of my top part of my lip. It wasn't blisters any longer but was kinda scabbing over and in the process of healing. 
I also have a little open wound under my tongue due to a glandular stone removal that they had to cut a small incision wich is still in the process of healing ( the procedure was done about a month ago) so it isn't completely healed. I also suffer from acid reflux wich is quite bad at times.

I declined the offer of giving him oral and instead engaged in mutual handjobs and penis rubbing and penis frottage as we call it. I can't recall feeling any or alot of precum on his penis while giving him a handjob.
My concern is that we used spit or saliva as lube during the mutual handjob session and while doing so by touching his penis with possible precum and then immediately touching my mouth with the above mentioned problems on the outside and inside of my mouth could cause possible entry points for Hiv transmission. My my mouth was quite dry due to al the wine drinking wich also concerns me.

I probably touching my mouth...lips and tongue about 3 times to use spit as lubricant immediately each time after touching his penis with possible precum.
He ejaculated and some of it got on a open cut a got during the evening and only realized and saw the cut the next morning. 

If he had a high viral load would transmission be possible in the scenarios I describe above?

1. Would touching his penis with possible precum and then immediately touching my mouth with the almost healing blisters/ ulcers on the corner of my mouth and lip increase the risk and would the small wound in my mouth and my acid reflux be a concern for transmission if it came into contact with it or if I swallowed some unnoticed precum or virus and he had a high viral load?

2. Does my dry mouth increase the risk due to not having enough enzymes to kill the virus due to all the wine etc?

3. Would his semen after he ejaculated on my hand and the wound cause any concern during the mutual handjobs.

We strictly only engaged in the above mentioned sexual acts as I know the risks of transmission due to anal and oral sex etc.

I honestly tried to do everything as safe as possible to avoid any other transmission. Just concerned that I might of put myself at risk with the above mentioned.

Some input would be greatly appreciated.

Kind regards

[Jim Allen]

I read your post three times, including the concerns about the condition of your mouth and the what-ifs.

Zero HIV risk, move on with your life.

Here's what you need to know to reduce your HIV risks:
Use condoms for anal or vaginal intercourse correctly and consistently, with no exceptions. Consider talking to your healthcare provider about PrEP as an additional layer of protection against HIV and get vaccinated against HPV, Hepatitis A & B.

Keep in mind that some sexual practices described as safe in terms of acquiring HIV still pose a risk for other easier-acquired STIs. So please do get tested at least yearly for STIs, including but not limited to HIV, and more frequently if condomless intercourse occurs.

Also, note that it is possible to have an STI and show no signs or symptoms; testing is the only way to know.

Kind regards

Jim

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[Worried 84]

Hi Jim....thank you so much for the speedy response and feedback.
So in short....I had no risk regardless of the healing( scabbing over blisters in the corner of my mouth and top lip....wound under tongue or acid reflux? Touching his precum and then my mouth will not cause transmission regardless of the above mentioned?
I believe I had a little Herpes 1 outbreak due to the blisters and scabbing wich is completely healed now.

So in short....even if I had all these things going on I should not be concerned regardless.

Was our sexual contact and experience safe for the both of us?
I would like to engage in more of these mutual handjob sessions and such as it's quite enjoyable.
I was just concerned over open entry points...pre cum...ejaculation etc.
Kind regards and much love.

[Jim Allen]

So in short....I had no risk regardless of the healing( scabbing over blisters in the corner of my mouth and top lip....wound under tongue or acid reflux? Touching his precum and then my mouth will not cause transmission regardless of the above mentioned?

Asked and answered already.

I believe I had a little Herpes 1 outbreak due to the blisters and scabbing wich is completely healed now.

So I feel I should comment on this, the activities you engaged in are not an HIV risk, having herpes doesn't change that.

Was our sexual contact and experience safe for the both of us?

Safe, no, it just wasn't a risk for HIV, there are other far easier-to-transmit STIs.

Also, you have HSV-1, which is primarily spread through skin contact but also saliva. Now, although HSV-1 primarily causes outbreaks in or around the mouth, it can infect the genital area, and even without an outbreak, your friend was at risk from the activities mentioned here. 

Now herpes can spread even when you don't have an outbreak but when you have an outbreak treatment options include taking antivirals, an alternative is, suppressive therapy (daily ongoing treatment) that will reduce the frequency of outbreaks but also reduce the risk of transmitting the virus to others. Anyhow, that's something you can discuss in detail if you wish with your healthcare provider.

Hi Jim....thank you so much for the speedy response and feedback.

You're welcome.

[Worried 84]

Hey Jim....thank you for the response and feedback.
It really calmed me down alot. I was on the edge of seeking Pep and considered testing for Hiv etc.
But you calmed me knowing that I don't need Hiv testing for the sexual contact and experience we had and that it was a no risk situation.

Thanks so so much.
Kind regards and much love

I'm much more calm in terms of Hiv now.



 
 

[Jim Allen]

You're welcome.