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Author Topic: Very worried  (Read 616 times)

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Offline Mikeatlas

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Very worried
« on: February 04, 2021, 02:19:30 pm »
Hello and thank you in advance for your help. Here is my situation:

Iím a male and Iíve never had intercourses before. A woman and I kissed and then she gave me unprotected oral one time and thatís it...it lasted about 5 minutes, I did not ejaculate as I stopped her because she was so rough. This was about 3.5 months ago.

Symptoms (4 days):

20 days after incidence: sore legs and muscle aches
21 days: sore legs and headache
22 days: headache
23 days: shortness of breath
24 days: shortness of breath
25 days: all symptoms stopped

Approx 8-10 weeks after incidence: rash on both forearms, the inside of forearm from the inner elbow to approx 4Ē from the wrist. Nothing on outside of arm. Itchy at some times. The rashes are approx 6Ē x 3Ē wide. The rash is unilateral...same on both arms. I still have the rashes.

Before reading a lot of the posts on this site Iíve read so much online regarding men receiving oral...even reputable sites like thebody which says that men receiving oral is a very ďsmallĒ risk and that itís more of a risk to the person giving oral to a man. So...they are saying thatís itís still a risk to receive??? Even some of the posts on here in the I just tested poz section say they were infected through oral???

Iím just so scared that I contracted hiv because of my symptoms...I never get sick and Iíve never in my life had a rash...ever.

I realize that you donít Assess based on symptoms and focus on the incident....but why these symptoms exactly 3 weeks afterwards...and then the inner forearm rashes???

I donít understand how itís not possible for me to catch hiv if she had a cut, any blood or any open sores in her mouth. My foreskin ripped during the act because she was so rough. I saw blood where is ripped just afterwards. So there was a pathway for the virus to enter. Plus...it was all deep throat...my penis stayed in her mouth the entire time...how is this any different than a penis being inside a vagina? Are we relying on the saliva to kill the hiv in her mouth before it enters me...is that basically it? How much saliva does she need to have in her mouth and does saliva kill the virus ďinstantaneouslyĒ so that it could ďneverĒ infect if the virus ever found its way in her mouth?

Please help me...Iím depressed, anxious and donít know what to think. This was my first sexual encounter ever. I done a lot of kissing before...but never any oral or Intercourse.


Offline Jim Allen

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Re: Very worried
« Reply #1 on: February 04, 2021, 03:36:06 pm »
Hiya,

Receiving a blowjob lacks the conditions required for acquiring HIV,  thus it makes sense that after nearly 40 years of this pandemic in terms of BJ's there hasnít been a single documented case of HIV transmission to an insertive partner (the person being "sucked") and you will not be the worlds first.

In short, you did not acquire HIV from this activity, that much is certain.

If you turned the situation around and you had meth mouth and was giving a guy a  blowjob I would have told you it's a minute risk that doesn't warrant testing outside of routine yearly screening for HIV.

Here's what you need to know to avoid HIV infection:
Use condoms for anal or vaginal intercourse, correctly and consistently, every time, no exceptions. Consider talking to your healthcare provider about PrEP as an additional layer of HIV protection going forward

Keep in mind that some sexual practices which may be described as Ďsafeí in terms of HIV transmission might still pose a risk for transmission of other STI's, so please do get fully tested regularly and at least yearly for all STI's including but not limited to HIV and test more frequently if unprotected intercourse occurs

Also, note that it is possible to have an STI and show no signs or symptoms and the only way of knowing is by testing.

Kind regards

Jim

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Offline Mikeatlas

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Re: Very worried
« Reply #2 on: February 04, 2021, 08:55:16 pm »
Thank you Jim for the quick response...it has helped put me somewhat at ease. I guess it makes me feel good that youíre so confident in your response to me. Iím just really scared and nervous...I canít shake this feeling. Iím feeling sad and knowing that youíre responding to help makes me feel better.

More questions...please help:

1) I know you never base assessments on symptoms...but you often mention to others thatís theirs are not hiv specific...You mentioned nothing about my Symptoms? My symptoms scare me a lot.

2) Can you please tell me if ever a person who became infected with HIV, would a rash appear so long after the earlier grouped symptoms? Also...does ars rash ever appear without fever?

3) so even if the person giving oral had the most horrific meth mouth, full of open leaking sores, bleeding cuts etc....there is absolutely no way whatsoever that hiv could live in their mouth even for 1 second? Saliva kills HIv instantaneously?

4) Am I understanding that I donít require HIV testing for my encounter?

Thanks again...

Offline Jim Allen

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Re: Very worried
« Reply #3 on: February 04, 2021, 09:32:37 pm »
1 & 2) Has nothing to do with HIV from this encounter as you had no HIV exposure during this encounter.  Please don't ask again.

3) Giving a blowjob, the mouth generally lacks the cells for HIV to infect and saliva is indeed a highly effective barrier. Saliva being instant, no, before it can infect, generally yes and there are multiple other barriers to this vector but as said giving a blowjob would be a minute risk that doesn't warrant testing outside of routine yearly screening for HIV.

Now getting back to the issue reported in your first post, you said you received a blowjob. That's different and zero HIV risk to you.

4) What you posted was no exposure, as there was no exposure there is no need to test over this incident. If you needed to test outside of standard routine I would mention it.

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PEP and PrEP

Offline Mikeatlas

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Re: Very worried
« Reply #4 on: February 05, 2021, 10:07:58 am »
Thanks again for getting back to me Jim. My apologies, Regarding question 3, I realize reading it now that I was not clear. I do understand when you refer to the minute risk to the person giving oral to a man who is HIV positive as pre cum and ejaculate are high in HIv. However, I do not understand it the other way around. Why is it any different in certain circumstances?

My question again for my peace of mind and education on this incident:

3) if the person giving oral was hiv positive and letís say had meth mouth, or open leaking sores, or bleeding cuts in the mouth etc., this person may have the virus inside their mouth correct...As you mentioned, saliva doesnít kill the virus instantaneously. So when giving oral to a man who has an open sore or a fresh bleeding cut on his penis...why doesnít the virus enter the mans penis? During Deep throat, the head of penis with a sore or cut pushed right up against an open sore in the givers throat...why doesnít the virus transmit while in the confines of the throat....and before saliva has had a chance to kill the virus yet? Please help me understand. As well, you use the word ďgenerallyĒ....how come?

4) re testing...I do not have standard routine hiv testing done...Iím not sexually active. This was my first and only exposure.

Thanks again

Offline Jim Allen

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Re: Very worried
« Reply #5 on: February 05, 2021, 11:01:57 am »
You are overthinking this and after 40 years of the HIV pandemic and over 80 million cases you are not going to find a new previously undocumented vector for acquiring HIV. It's somewhat irrational.

When ejaculating into your mouth, it's a fluid that contains a large quality of HIV that can be directly in contact with damaged tissue. The barriers present are similar but it's totally different mechanics, quantity and time to your concern. As said even if you had given a guy a blowjob, it would be a minute risk that does not warrant specific testing.

Back to your activities as said receiving a blowjob lacks the conditions required for acquiring HIV, even with a trace amount of blood that does normally happen. Thus it makes sense that after nearly 40 years of this pandemic in terms of BJ's there hasnít been a single documented case of HIV transmission to an insertive partner (the person being "sucked") and you will not be the worlds first.

Now if you told me you stabbed the person in the mouth with a knife or had beat them to a bloody pulp and they required urgent medical care with blood pissing out of their face but instead sucked you off first, I would agree it would be a theoretic risk as in it's never actually happened. 

However, this was not the case, you did not get covered in blood or have some sort of extreme event like the ones I mentioned. You simply got a blowjob and it lacks the conditions needed to acquire HIV, move on with your life.

Quote
4) re testing...I do not have standard routine hiv testing done...Iím not sexually active. This was my first and only exposure.

You had no HIV exposure from this event. However, there are far easier to acquire STI's and you clearly are sexually active. Test at least yearly for STI's & HIV out of routine.
« Last Edit: February 05, 2021, 12:10:39 pm by Jim Allen »
HIV 101 - Everything you need to know
HIV 101
Read more about Testing here:
HIV Testing
Read about Treatment-as-Prevention (TasP) here:
HIV TasP
You can read about HIV prevention here:
HIV prevention
Read about PEP and PrEP here
PEP and PrEP

 


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