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Author Topic: Yet another oral question.  (Read 1143 times)

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Offline jakemankc

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Yet another oral question.
« on: November 07, 2019, 10:10:34 am »
Hello,

I am posting this already knowing what the answer is probably going to be but really looking for peace of mind as my mind is racing.

Lately I have been very conscious of what I do sexually to the point where I am starting to get health anxiety from it. I think its a bit of my conscious and self not wanting to be out randomly hooking up with people and it manifests in anxiety. I digress.

I will keep this short and to the point. Last week I did an HIV / STD test and came back negative for HIV (haven't heard yet on the STD. No call is a good thing as they only call if you do). Prior to that test the last sexual engagement I had was 8 weeks so that puts me in the clear for HIV nearly definite. Prior to this test I had anxiety and did a at home saliva rapid test at 1,3,4,5,6,7 all negative. Then went into the clinic on exactly 8 weeks for the 4th generation blood test as stated previously.

A week later (this last Monday) I relapsed on some uppers and engaged in sexual acts with someone that if not known and was stereotyped they would be considered a high risk person (CSW, MTF TG, ethnicities etc). Before we engaged we talked about sexual status and she assured me she gets tested every 3 months and is very in tune with her body, and on prep. I know none of this matters except to help my mind reason.

She had condoms everywhere and we began to have oral sex with condom on. We both engaged in oral sex. This lasted a good amount of the day as we were both pretty into it off and on. About half way through we stopped using the condoms for oral sex.

We did NOT engage in any anal sex whatsoever.

I only have a couple concerns for HIV and I know the risk is basically 0 for me receiving oral sex and next to 0 performing oral sex but what has me paranoid is that the day before I slightly bit my tongue on the front left side and there was a small white sore from it. It was not open nor ever even bled. Also she did not ejactulate inside my mouth at all but there was 3 times in which I tasted pre-cum.

From my understanding without ejactulation in the mouth it lowers the risk even more and pre-cum generally has little to none of the virus. So only theoretical was is if the pre-cum somehow infected me orally which seems a bit ludicrous. Only other thing I mention is since we did engage in oral for a good while there was some time where the mouth was somewhat dry but never really "parched" as I know saliva inhibits the virus as well.

I plan to get tested again on 21 days as I may have met someone I would pursue in a relationship and I want to be certain I am clean of everything.

Offline Jim Allen

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Re: Yet another oral question.
« Reply #1 on: November 07, 2019, 01:57:21 pm »
Hiya,

People are not a high or low risk to you, what matters is what activities you choose to engage in and more to the point how that make a risk or not.

So reading your post, why were you excessively testing so often? What risk did you have to test for until 8 weeks? Anyhow a 6+ week result will rarely ever change, although you can repeat at 3 months for a conclusive result.

As for this recent event, giving a blowjob is a near negligible concern that we don't recommend testing over outside of standard routine, nothing you mentioned changes this. Getting your penis sucked is not an HIV risk.

Here's what you need to know in order to avoid hiv infection:
Use condoms for anal or vaginal intercourse, correctly and consistently, every time, no exceptions. Consider starting PrEP as an additional layer of HIV protection going forward

Keep in mind that some sexual practices which may be described as ‘safe’ in terms of HIV transmission might still pose a risk for transmission of other STI's, so please do get fully tested regularly and at least yearly for all STI's including but not limited to HIV and test more frequently if unprotected intercourse occurs

Also note that it is possible to have an STI and show no signs or symptoms and the only way of knowing is by testing.

More information on HIV Basics, PEP, TaSP and Transmission can be found through the links in my signature to our POZ pages, this includes information on HIV Testing

Kind regards

Jim

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Offline jakemankc

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Re: Yet another oral question.
« Reply #2 on: November 07, 2019, 02:01:22 pm »
Well the prior 8 week engagement was oral sex with someone that i found out was "positive undetectable" so i was extremely paranoid. I couldnt make it to the clinic to get a good 4th generation test so I was stuck with the Oraquick Saliva test. And reading online there was mixed advice on how accurate those tests could detect the antibodies so I just kept taking them weekly (probably a dumb idea).

It sounds like my risk is still low but may follow up with routine test or earlier if I can just to have peace of mind.

Offline Jim Allen

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Re: Yet another oral question.
« Reply #3 on: November 07, 2019, 02:15:12 pm »
Hiya.

Risk okay thanks for clarifying

To be frank, "Low" risk is a gross overestimation of the risk, its hysterical.
Overall you need to stop looking for issues you don't have and stop the merry-go-round of pointless testing, running out and testing over "near negligible risks" or totally "no-risk" situation in life is not a healthy or sustainable coping strategy for your fears.   

Regarding giving him a BJ, even if he was HIV positive with a detectable high viral load - Generally speaking the mouth simply lacks route (Cells to infect) for HIV, and even if there was damage to your mouth creating route than saliva neutralize HIV by damaging the receptors needed to infect human cells.

All in all, giving a blowjob is such a minute concern with regards to HIV that we don't even recommend specifically testing over it. Just get tested whenever you are next normally due a routine check-up.

If he was undetectable then it was no risk, as in zero! A person living with HIV (PLHIV), who is on Antiretroviral Therapy (ART) and has achieved an undetectable viral load* in their blood for at least 6 months, can not sexually transmit HIV.

This is also known as Undetectable = Untransmittable (U=U)
(*undetectable viral load defined as less than 200 copies/milliliter)

Unless you have been engaging in other sexual activities not mentioned here, forget about the testing, move on with your life and simply test yearly out of routine, in addition, talk to your health care provider about taking PrEP, PrEP is taking a pill daily as an additional layer against HIV bit it might also give you peace of mind for the future.
HIV 101 - Everything you need to know
HIV 101
Read more about Testing here:
HIV Testing
Read about Treatment-as-Prevention (TasP) here:
HIV TasP
You can read about HIV prevention here:
HIV prevention
Read about PEP and PrEP here
PEP and PrEP

Offline jakemankc

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Re: Yet another oral question.
« Reply #4 on: November 23, 2019, 06:57:14 pm »
Hello and thank you again for your message. I understand how ridiculous things may sound and aware that logic rarely outweighs emotions in these scenarios.

I had gotten over my initial scare but was again presented with another that has terrified me to my core. If I can explain and this will be the last question so please entertain it even if I am being illogical.

My unprotected oral encounter we spoke about happened on Monday November 4th. Then on Thursday November 7th I had unprotected sex with my partner. I did not ejactulate inside of them and pulled out (possible precut). This would have been roughly 3 days later.

A week after that they started developing flu type symptoms. This came as a light fever (100-101), went away then has came back and peaked one night at 103. I know symptoms do not indicate status but they went in and the doctor took a urinalysis and labs (not sure if std related) the urinalysis came back today but the blood work has not.

This is getting me to freak out that the blood work is not normal and somehow is going to be HIV. I know this may sound ridiculous but it’s paralyzed me in stress. I cannot imagine myself if this happened. I have not had any symptoms or any indication of HIV  at the current moment.

My question is this and please answer no matter how ridiculous it sounds. Is it highly likely that someone would get HIV on a Monday then have enough viral load by Thursday to pass it on to someone? I literally cannot find anything online to indicate this and most say it spikes “weeks” after being infected and about a month is at its peak?

Offline Jim Allen

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Re: Yet another oral question.
« Reply #5 on: November 23, 2019, 09:12:56 pm »
Hiya,

It takes just about a week for HIV to initially infect and symptoms within a week would have nothing to do with HIV even if there was exposure.

Quote
I know symptoms do not indicate status
Correct so stop focusing on them.

Quote
I had unprotected sex with my partner.

Obvious prehaps but unprotected intercourse with your partner would meet all the biological conditions needed for you to acquire HIV.

I don't judge couples that decide to engage in unprotected intercourse, it's often based on trust within a relationship, however, just note this trust or faith does not prevent HIV and any unprotected intercourse is simply accepting the possible risk of you acquiring HIV.

Test regularly.
HIV 101 - Everything you need to know
HIV 101
Read more about Testing here:
HIV Testing
Read about Treatment-as-Prevention (TasP) here:
HIV TasP
You can read about HIV prevention here:
HIV prevention
Read about PEP and PrEP here
PEP and PrEP

 


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