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Author Topic: Personal conscience trouble  (Read 675 times)

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Offline Mindless

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Personal conscience trouble
« on: July 08, 2019, 11:15:00 am »
A comment in another thread just prompted me to reflect about my own sexual behavior and not only.

Iím straight and being married for about 8 years. Very long story short: me and wife have a strong bond but sexual desire from my side faded just after only a couple of years. I was very slowly recovering from a very very long chronic depression when I decided to marry and part of the physical symptoms consisted in ED (erection dysfunction) and lack of desire. Along the way I started both anti-depressants and after Cialis (to help with the ED). When this happened though the sexual relationship with my wife was already compromised and after a while I started what I guess some married men usually do: looking for paid sex.

Fast forward: a strange mix of anti-depressant, Cialis and over all my lost control over my personal life pushed me in a whirl of sexual compulsion which, living in Thailand, itís not difficult to satisfy in every way. This is the way I got infected I suppose.

Fast forward again: after more than 2 years from the dx, Iíve been UD since a couple of months after the dx. Iím still married with the same wonderful woman. We still donít have sex. After 6/7 months from dx I restarted my parallel sexual life meeting other women more or less regularly. Itís always paid sex but over time I developed sort of relationships with a couple of women: we physically like each other and they need some help with family economy. Thatís it. Not so unusual  in Thailand after all.

As I said Iíve been undetectable for more than 2 years now and I always use condom, no exceptions, except for oral sex. The problem is I never ever disclosed my status to any of them. Thailand on average is also a very very stigmatized society. Besides, only mentioning HIV here creates panic and information is still very low.

Long story which actually should be much longer than what I could write but my question is: should I disclose to these women? I donít mean on a legal level, cause I donít think such laws exist here in Thailand (I may be wrong though) but more on a moral level.

« Last Edit: July 08, 2019, 11:34:10 am by Mindless »

Offline Expat1

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  • Posts: 358
Re: Personal conscience trouble
« Reply #1 on: July 08, 2019, 05:10:24 pm »
Show them your Viral Load test.  It says undetectable.   If they want more info, pay for a clinic visit.  There they learn U=U.


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