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Author Topic: IF no one knows did it even happen ?  (Read 921 times)

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Offline em

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IF no one knows did it even happen ?
« on: February 06, 2019, 10:09:01 pm »
Like if  a tree in the forest falls

I did not know were to post these thoughts ? I did not want to hog this website with my writing

we all do are part in our own way

funny how life works

I had mentioned to me ID Doc that I thought that sperm as far as I knew did not have the virus that it was the other parts of the semen seminal fluid  had the virus. and that there had to be a way to separate out the sperm cells from the semen Maybe centrifuge it ?

they call the process density gradient centrifugation.  sterile fluid at the right temp and consistency is added and  the sperm swims out from the seminal fluids in the semen and the virus is left behind. at least that is how I read it

Funny how I had mentioned this to my ID doc and a couple years later it was available . then my wife could not get time off from work and we could not take the four hour drive to the clinic that offered this  and we did not have the 800 $ price tag to take the chance on a might get pregnant. Health insurance would not cover it . 

then I Had mentioned to MY ID doc about how wealthy people way back when would take small dosses of arsenic to try and  prevent getting sick ?  About five years later PREP came out .

Not that I had anything to do with the actual research and development of  these ideas.  i just through them out there thinking it might help if these ideas were given some thought .

I am not trying to take credit, I am sure other like minded people were thinking the same thing at the same time trying their best to improve peoples lives

Just another of life's coincidences.

I had also thought that someone out there might read some of the stuff I through out here and give me a leg up in this world to help me become part of the going on in life rather then just a spectator.  A long shot but just like a lottery ticket if you do not play you do not win. That was my delusion my fantasy day dream.  I know that there is no chance it is not like anyone who reads this stuff even has the connections to do such a thing . It would take a much larger audience with a much larger connections to yield such a result . Not going to happen I know but if I do not tell you about this dream no one will know I had it and the chances become nothing if no one knows is it like it never happened like a tree that falls in the woods if no one hears it did it even happen.  Like my dream if I do not tell anyone it is like it never happened and the chances of it actually happening decrease dramatically.

Just a thought to ponder. about life nothing happens in a vacuum. which means if nothing is there  nothing is going to happen

all my best to you




Offline em

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Re: IF no one knows did it even happen ?
« Reply #1 on: February 07, 2019, 04:10:11 pm »
please pardon my drastic transition of topics I did not want to write two posts it seems I write here way to much already.   

but this one is completely off the topic of the original post submitted for your enjoyment a tale of the how HIV may have started. the damage it can do and the hope of stopping it might bring 

I wrote a story like this before here but thought today about a longer more descriptive version that might actually take off and be worthwhile story to read ?

the great white hunter patient zero

chapter one

first scene   

The narrator  says this is only fiction the truth about when this started is a mystery .

this story is far more tolerable, tasteful,  and closer to the truth  then the one I heard about the island resort of the coast of Africa where gay men go to experience intimate relations with male apes?

this Guy who's name is  Buck  Naked ( no one says there can not be humor in it ? ) Adventurer tough guy and a real man's man . O ya He is also gay and has a live in man servant / lover

He is out in the wild hunting for a trophy silver  back gorilla the year is 1950. He drives through the jungle with his guide. ever vigilant and attentive of all around him when out of the corner of his eye he sees the objective of his hunt . the largest silver back gorilla he and his guide have ever seen . the gorilla is menacingly playing with his children and wife in field of flowers and butterflies just enjoying all life has to offer when the great white hunter fires his oversize riffle and the shot hits the gorilla right in the back and through his chest just missing the young gorilla child he was holding in his arms .

While the gorilla falls to the ground passing the child to their mother who signals to the children to run in grunts and screams they run off leaving the gorilla mortally wounded laying in the field. Buck walks over to the gorilla to admire his handy work steps his foot on the gorillas back and tells his guide to get a picture so he can brag about this back at the club when he gets home .  Just then  the gorilla holding his chest and getting blood all over his hands grabs the hunters leg with his blood soaked hands and bites him with the blood now in his mouth and contaminating  the wound on the hunters leg.   Giving him SIV which now becomes HIV . the guide shoots the gorilla in the head making sure that his time on earth is finished .   the great white hunters gets angry saying you just ruined the perfect trophy ..

He gets back to the club bragging how he had fought the gorilla in hand to hand combat and he has the wound to prove it  before taking its life and how exhilarating the contest between man and beast can leave a glorious feeling of victory . Not knowing the virus he now caries that should have been called the great silver back gorillas revenge ..   He and his servant celebrate his return in the way a couple who has intimate knowledge of each other might do.  Giving the virus to the second person to carry it. a few years later when the servant is out and about no longer having employment with the great white hunter Buck who for some reason his health had failed and he passed away. Unnoticed by the health care industry  . the valet has taken the money left to him by the wealthy hunter and has taken to hanging out in gay bath houses enjoying a large number of anonymous sexual contacts. thus the spread of HIV is well under way and over the next years spreads like the wild fire we have found our selves now living in.

this is just a short version hey you get what you pay for? For me to write a longer version I need to find someone to do the chores around the house I find myself being the one in charge of doing so I can spend more time writing.

second chapter

the untold story of women, children  and HIV

this young beautiful, full of life and full of compassion the type of young girl every boy would fall passionately helplessly in love with . But she finds her self falling in love with troubled young men she thinks her love can save. She find her self alone with child and lost. she finds a way to make it work and gives birth to the most beautiful child not just in her eyes but everyone who meets these two feels they have seen the greatness of gods work in such a mother and child . they think this is evidences of divinity at work at the love they see in the eyes of this lost and alone mother and child .  then the child keeps getting ill and the mother gets to clinic to plead please save my child. then the truth comes out the mother and child booth have HIV .   

could write for days on this but laundry and dishes need to be done and tomorrow is trash day

I hope these stories are something someone might want to tell abut the devastation HIV has left a scar on our collective social landscape and with do diligence and time a cure would prevent this from ever happening again in the future. what can we do right now to prevent this from being something someone else might have to suffer through .   get tested get treated and have a blessed glorious long life stopping the virus from ever doing something like this ever again is before this type of situation  happens to anyone else.

all my best to you


« Last Edit: February 07, 2019, 04:34:12 pm by em »

Offline em

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Re: IF no one knows did it even happen ?
« Reply #2 on: February 07, 2019, 05:45:12 pm »
almost forgot the third part showing how far we have come

the third part of this story would be about how far we have come with with undetectable not only could someone have a child but you can live long enough to enjoy watching  them grow up for me I could have had a child that would be 25 now after being twenty five years undetectable / but I unfortunately live by the rule if you can not afford something you can not have it ? It was not known what might happen in the future yet if sustained suppression of the virus was even possible yet ?

does not mean that a story could not have a chapter about a couple who through sperm washing and or just taking the chance of having sex have HIV - child and a now that child is in around twenty five college grad and married .   Just to show how far we have come . that this type of thing is not a one time happenstance but now it is in anyone future. if  life does not throw other obstacles in their  way .

just a story about HIV that might someday be worth telling

thank you so much for giving me the opportunity to tell this story  to you

Offline em

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Re: IF no one knows did it even happen ?
« Reply #3 on: February 08, 2019, 01:38:14 pm »
this story is far more tolerable, tasteful,  and closer to the truth  then the one I heard about the island resort of the coast of Africa where gay men go to experience intimate relations with male apes?

I had thought I had already told this story but here is a recap about it'

the year was 1988 or there about. I was visiting my mother, her husband and my younger brother who was in high school. He came home from school with his eye brow nit and furrow wrinkles on his forehead and was pacing back and forth. I had said to him Hey what is bugging you today.     He says this teacher had gotten up in front of the class and said. He new what the origin of AIDS was. He told the class that there was an island of the coast of Africa were gay tourist go to get it on with male apes ?   I laughed and told him his teacher was a fool and that what he said I thought was idiotic and not true just some weird  gesture to instill some sort of emotional shock response from young impressionable minds .   

just thought I should mention were that story came from before I get stuck with the credit of starting it .

Offline em

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Re: IF no one knows did it even happen ?
« Reply #4 on: February 09, 2019, 06:46:13 am »
please pardon my drifty  nature of these thoughts

 I recall AIDS in Africa getting some much needed attention and that is a good thing
But i had wanted to point out that AIDS in our own back yard was not easy either

an analogy

ever hear that is like comparing apples and oranges?

comparing AIDS in Africa to AIDS in our own back yard

Is like comparing rotten apples to rotten oranges

it is horrible all over  granted I had wanted to bring attention to this twenty years ago. But found myself hitting my head against a brick wall that the establishment had put up to prevent my kind from speaking out . it is hard to take on the world alone and is never  ever successful

what kind is that ? low income I guess I did not have the right look to fit in to their world and was looked down on and not given any attention as a creditable opinion they wanted anything to do with.

please pardon my anger on not being heard but that really hurt not being able to speak my mind

thank you so much for having this place I can tell you about life and AIDS


Offline em

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Re: IF no one knows did it even happen ?
« Reply #5 on: February 12, 2019, 12:04:14 am »
well I have 280 views . does anyone think this might be story worth telling as a play at a theater?

 nineteen eighties
have a young couple living in joyful bliss. love is in the air. a young man with a troubled past. A young girl who  thinks her love can save him. they are completely  and endlessly in love.  he some how gets the idea that robing a gas station to get some cash might be what would make their lives complete . He gets shot and killed. she finding out she is with child tries to save the life that had started with in her. after the child is born she notices that the child is sick and tries to get help to save her child. the child dies .she finds out she has HIV and that is what had taken her child, broken spirit ,  heart and mind she no longer has a reason to live and her body soon follows do to  her broken spirit.   tragic story to start the play.   

Her parents standing over her lifeless body  cry out HOW COULD THIS HAPPEN .

enter the story of the great white hunter .
in 1950

still a work in progress. does anyone think this might be story worth putting on as a play at a theater ?

or as a critique. that is a waste of time ? well thank you for letting me try to get an idea out there even if I  seem to be the only one who thinks this might be worth while endeavor . 

I apologize for taking up so much of your time.

this will never work the story has already been told and everyone is tired of hearing about HIV .   

all the best to you and god bless

I will keep writing and put it into a flash drive and though the flash drive  away what I had written to never see the light of day .

just wanted to be heard . A bit over dramatic I know but um what can I say ? thank you for reading this and have a great day


Offline em

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Re: IF no one knows did it even happen ?
« Reply #6 on: February 13, 2019, 08:33:18 am »
after the first part of the young girl with everything to live for.  have a PSA public service announcement to help show that many people were and are effected by HIV.
to show that this could happen to anyone .
By saying  many people have been infected including women and their children born with HIV and even molested children .

also say that Buck Naked man servant valet house boy companion when he  opens a bath house, trying to help liberate and free sexual desires. He unintentionally opened the door for a faster spread of HIV.   


I wonder does anyone think that a story like this might  confuse and bewilder an audience ?  would this offend anyone ?

I would not know unless I ask others with HIV if this might be worth while story to tell.

I was thinking of trying this at a local community theater ?

to entertain as well as open eyes hearts and minds .

Maybe a high school or university production ?

Offline em

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Re: IF no one knows did it even happen ?
« Reply #7 on: February 13, 2019, 01:06:06 pm »
would this part be offensive ?

first scene

there is a card on the stage that says

the present

Long Time survivor

A older middle aged man sitting on a park bench

 in worn out cloths dirty and tired looking distrot sad, sorrowful. anguished distressed heartbroken cheerless dejected depressed despairing devastated down heartsick heavyhearted hurting ... (synonyms of distrot )
and down and out

people just passing them by paying no attention to him. not  noticing that he is even there      a peak into his inside mind,  narrator  says his thoughts or he says  thank god I survived AIDS for the past many many  years . and I feel great full to be alive just sitting here on a park bench ,  (   In a sad tired voice ) then he stands up slowly grabs his cane and leans on it . then  He says   how could this happen. while shaking his head he starts to walk of slowly cautiously leaning on the cane stage right . then someone yells out from offstage left over here . he stops drops his head shaking it then he turns and starts spinning his cane like Charlie Chaplin and strolls off doing the Chaplin walk stage left..  Encase no one knows what a Charlie Chaplin walk is  pigeon toe walk back arched spinning his cane and rocking from side to side while smiling cheerfully oblivious  ?

cause everyone loves a clown > just trying to ad some levity to a depressing play

then the young love story from 1980

sorry just trying to build a story about HIV that might be worth telling and entertaining at the same time ?

« Last Edit: February 13, 2019, 01:19:29 pm by em »


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