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Author Topic: I would really like to ask for personal experience...  (Read 650 times)

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Offline Alexander1992

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I would really like to ask for personal experience...
« on: December 16, 2018, 01:03:59 pm »
Hey everyone. I've been offline for some time now... I am a gay guy living with HIV since 2014 and I am undetectable since the starting of the treatment,otherwise a healthy young man with no other STD'S..I've had two sero-negative partners and had a lot of unprotected sex with them,and they stayed negative.Recently I started dating another negative guy and had sex several times,he knows about my status but still he does not believe in the U=U or tasp way of prevention...We had unprotected intercourse,he was top but there was some blood during the intercourse,I guess its due to me having some other problems down there(warts and Hemorrhoids). I've never bleed before during sex and I have some trouble sleeping... Should we consider going to my doctor and ask for PEP(but its only available for medical staff),or he is totally safe? Did someone have this kind of problem before? Thank you for you answers and sorry for my  bad English. :)

Offline Jim Allen

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Re: I would really like to ask for personal experience...
« Reply #1 on: December 16, 2018, 02:42:52 pm »
Glad to hear you are doing well and dating.  :)
That's a great update and I hope things continue to go well.

I moved your thread and the more senior forum members jump in with advice/support if they want to do so.

Quote
Recently I started dating another negative guy and had sex several times,he knows about my status but still he does not believe in the U=U or tasp way of prevention...

Quote
Should we consider going to my doctor and ask for PEP(but its only available for medical staff),or he is totally safe?

Sorry to hear that he is not open towards U=U message, its only backed by 21 years of scientific studies & research. We all act as if its new but really its not at all.
Glad to hear you do understand the message though but sad to hear you now seem to be having doubts. Perhaps also because of your partners rejections of the facts in front of him.

So foremost don't let your partners fears & doubts become yours! and a buit of blood during sex is not going to change U=U, blood, sweat, tears, sperm,anal fluids, vaginal fluids, it all part of a good time  ;)

If you he has continued doubts he could take PrEP going forward for peace of mind, or use condoms and that is totally up to him how he chooses to protect himself and what he chooses to believe or not regarding TaSP, it also depends on what he is comfortable with.

However his choices and what he cares to believe in or not do not change the facts! the fact is thanks to TaSP this incident does not warrants any action or PEP. I think you know this as already.

Look if it helps i've shagged half the nation they don't have HIV from me. I travel for work around the world so over the years I've shagged most other nations and they don't have HIV from me either. (Before my current partner of course ;))

Its not a new question about doubt from people living with HIV for no real reason, or due to a partners doubt, guilt, internalized stigma perhaps and I have added a few recent posts about peoples concerns and, this help give you some additional peace of mind.

TaSP Treatment as Prevention
https://forums.poz.com/index.php?topic=70723.0

Afraid of infecting
https://forums.poz.com/index.php?topic=70027.0

Factors associated with perceived accuracy of the Undetectable = Untransmittable
https://forums.poz.com/index.php?topic=69837.0

IS HE INFECTED?
https://forums.poz.com/index.php?topic=65601.0

Can you help me?
https://forums.poz.com/index.php?topic=68030.0


Anyhow take it easy, enjoy life.

Stop panicking about infecting someone, its a horrible burden that with well treated HIV simply has no place in reality.

Jim
Quote
Thank you for you answers and sorry for my  bad English. :)

No need to apologize, many forum members including myself don't have great spelling talent. 
« Last Edit: December 16, 2018, 02:56:29 pm by JimDublin »
HIV 101 - Everything you need to know
HIV 101
Transmission and Risks:
HIV Transmission and Risks
Read more about Testing here:
HIV Testing
Read about Treatment-as-Prevention (TasP) here:
HIV TasP
You can read about HIV prevention here:
HIV prevention
Read about PEP and PrEP here
PEP and PrEP

Offline Alexander1992

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Re: I would really like to ask for personal experience...
« Reply #2 on: December 18, 2018, 08:07:51 am »
Hey Jim thank You for your response,You made me feel really better.
I am aware of my irrational fear about infecting someone else,but I do believe in science and the research in the past decade and more. U=U and that's it. :)
I wish people in my county were more detailed like you when giving advices.
Even people living with HIV and working in the NGO sector(as hiv peer counselors)are not that open for support and advice,they only do that job just to get some money and you know the rest...
Prep is not available in my country(F.Y.R.O.M.) and also Pep is only available for medical staff and maybe for some people close to the medical staff working at the clinic.

I do however have some doubt because I had a change in regime in the past month and still haven't done pcr test(we do them on 6 months),but a week before change in treatment I was UD(less then 20 copies).
But things are just like that,that is the best we can get for taking care of ourselfs in this forgotten part of the world.
Take Care and all the best :)

P.S. If someone else have doubts about infecting their partners when having sex and they have UD viral load just stick to the facts.
undetectable equals untransmittable,and I say that from personal experience.

Offline harleymc

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Re: I would really like to ask for personal experience...
« Reply #3 on: December 22, 2018, 02:35:06 am »
I'm wondering what you mean by having unprotected sex.

If you're viral load is undetectable then that is protection enough for your partner.  If you are still thinking and talking about no condoms equals unprotected, then how do you expect a y partner to have confidence in U=U?

 


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