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Author Topic: how to tell.....  (Read 4988 times)

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Offline AsiaGuy

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how to tell.....
« on: December 12, 2006, 06:28:30 AM »
Hello Forum,

I read most of the posts here but I am still really freaking out. Here's my story: I currently live in Asia and 5 months ago I sex (including anal) with a several Thai women who definitely fall into the category very high risk. To my knowledge (I have to say this as I was severely intoxicated) the sex was protected and the condoms did not fail. I am however not sure that the condoms were used properly and did not slip off slightly during intercourse. The ladies also performed unprotected oral sex on me, which was very very vigorous; to the extent that I had to ask her to stop after I had ejaculated.

I have had so many symptoms since that event that I am sure that I have contracted the HIV virus:

Post exposure symptoms:
5 days – Pharyngitis, white tongue, hotheadedness
7 –14 days - Pharyngitis, white tongue, arthralgia, myalgia, hotheadedness, headaches,
16 – 28 days - Pharyngitis, white tongue, arthralgia, myalgia, hotheadedness, headaches, retro-orbital pain, conjunctivitis and red bumps around the eyes (rash?).

The arthralgia/myalgia and white tongue has remained until even 50 days post exposure. Aside from that, I have also had numerous episodes of angular cheilitis, to the extent that it is now chronic! I have also had sporadic rashes lasting maybe around 10 minutes, which then resided. During the first 10 weeks post exposure, I have not had any night sweats, fever or lymphadenopathy.

After these initial ARS symptoms, I have also had a lot of other symptoms that indicate that my immune system is quite impaired: I have had 2 recurring throat aches and I have frequent recurring headaches. Aside from that, I have a slight fungal toe-nail infection and I have had costochondritis twice (include one night where I had a fever). The angular cheilitis is also still very persistent and present and affect my whole upper lip. To make matters even worse, I have two mild outbreaks of Herpes Zoster (on my face). All of these fit into the category HIV!

Although the exposure risk maybe doesn’t seem too high, I am quite sure that the ladies were HIV positive. Aside from that, I am concerned that the aggressive oral sex may have caused blood exposure right into my urethra – isn’t that I much higher risk of transmission?

I have been freaking out for the past few months and I don’t know what to do. I can’t get tested here as I am a guest worker and am currently in the process of having my work permit renewed (I live in one of those countries that deports you if they find out your are HIV + - how narrowminded can these coutries be!)

I only have one specific question: after Primary HIV infection, can your immune system become so impaired after only 3 months that you fall into the WHO clinical stage 2 category (as I have had all those symptoms)?

BTW – sorry for the long post!

Offline RapidRod

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Re: Exposure to high risk individuals and symptoms (all of 'em!)
« Reply #1 on: December 12, 2006, 06:32:08 AM »
You used protection and you got a blowjob. Then you weren't at risk. By the way, the girls aren't any risker than you.

Offline Coffeechick88

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Re: Exposure to high risk individuals and symptoms (all of 'em!)
« Reply #2 on: December 12, 2006, 06:51:05 AM »
Son, you are jumping to the HIV conclusion way too fast.  Don't chase supposed symptoms of HIV and make a diagnosis on yourself.  Have you even had anything confirmed?  As for herpes zoster--assuming you actually have it since you don't even indicate you have been to a doctor and imply you are diagnosing yourself--HIV negative people can get it to.  You can't even say these things are ARS.  And no, you wouldn't have a severely impaired immune system within 3 months.  These symptoms can be many things other than HIV and the patients we see, except the really obsessive compulsive ones who will continue to worry about HIV until their dying day, when they see a negative result their symptoms magically vanish.  So slow down, you are jumping to conclusions here.

Those women who you are sure are HIV positive--have you seen a positive test from them?  Or are you just assuming because you feel their characters make them a candidate?  And remember--you cannot look down on them since you were the one seeing them, so you really aren't any better person or any more moral.  You cannot judge people's status like that.  We people who have HIV don't have a certain look or lifestyle.

As for the risk.  HIV cannot pass through intact latex--no way, no how and oral sex just isn't risky.  I would say since you were intoxicated and thus might not remember everything to get a test at the 3 month mark to just be on the safe side.  It is smart for every sexually active person to get regular HIV/STD screens anyway.  As for the results, I would bet my next week's paycheck that you are negative and you will see all your symptoms magically vanish.
Lucas James is here
Born 6-14-08 at 1233 am
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Offline AsiaGuy

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  • Posts: 4
Re: Exposure to high risk individuals and symptoms (all of 'em!)
« Reply #3 on: December 12, 2006, 08:54:44 AM »

Thanks for you reassuring words. BTW - in no way do I look down on anyone except myself in this situation. Since this incident some months ago, I have reallised that world has been terrible in placing such a stigma on HIV - with no reason whatsoever. I have joined various organisations here in the area as I feel somone has to do soemthing about this - so why not me!

I have seen several doctors during the time I was suspecting ARS as I wanted a professional opinion. The only thing they confirmed was that I did not have swollen lymph nodes, did not have thrush and did not have a fever. The rash on my face is a different story as I also had conjuctivitis at the time, which I may have gotten frpm a hotel pool. They could not explain my arthralgia or pharyngitis.

I tested 8 days after exposure so that I at least would know if I was HIV + before my this event. I tested negative at the time. I have not had a follow up test due to the reason I mentioned initially.

What does still really concern me though is the angular cheilitis and the herpes zoster. Although the herpes zoster was not confirmed by a doctor, it is quite unmistakeable from the descriptions and pain. Aside from that, I also have the distinct impression that I am suffering from something like Sjogrens syndrome.

anyway, thanks again for your reassuring words and sorry if anyone was offended - it was definitely not my intention. 

Offline toothfairy

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Re: Exposure to high risk individuals and symptoms (all of 'em!)
« Reply #4 on: December 12, 2006, 11:13:03 AM »
Hey there,
How do you even know about Sjogren's?  Been searching the internet or do you have a family member with it?  Either way, you should stop worrying about it.  A much more likely explanation for the angular cheilitis is that you're very stressed right now.  The stress is leading to less saliva, which is one of the many causes of angular cheilitis.  It can also be caused by you frequently stretching you mouth open to examine your tongue, or by pulling you cheeks back to search for any other symptoms anywhere in your mouth.  My bet is that if you can relax a bit, and stop searching your mouth for symptoms, the cheilitis will go away in about 5-7 days.

BTW, you dentist or doctor can help you diagnose Sjogren's if your still concerned about it.  But I wouldn't bother  with that at this point.  If you go on like this for a couple of months, and your mouth AND eyes become painfully dry, then talk to them about it.   In the meantime, take a deep breath, and realize that no symptoms you find will tell you if you have HIV or not.  All you can do is listen to the advice that has been given to you already, realize that you were not at risk (thanks to the condoms and to the nature or oral sex), and that if you really can't let it go then you'll have to stick it out and take an HIV test at 13 weeks, no matter what symptoms you have or don't have.  I'm not worried for you.  You'll be fine!

Take care!

Offline RapidRod

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  • Posts: 15,288
Re: Exposure to high risk individuals and symptoms (all of 'em!)
« Reply #5 on: December 12, 2006, 11:22:54 AM »
Tooth, please keep all your thoughts and questions in your own thread. You are not in a position to give advice in this forum.

Offline AsiaGuy

  • Member
  • Posts: 4
Re: Exposure to high risk individuals and symptoms (all of 'em!)
« Reply #6 on: January 01, 2007, 04:08:31 PM »
Hi All, I'm back.

I just wanted to let you know that I finally got the nerve to test and I tested NEGATIVE!! And you were right - some of my symptoms magically disappeared.

I do have a few questions however - I managed to get my hands on the Vscan HIV 1&2 test kit which is sold over the counter in Hong Kong. I have read on internet that many countries use this testing system but I am not sure if it is FDA approved and I know it is not sold in Canada. Can anyone tell me of this test kits accuracy? Can I be confident that I am truly negative? Also, this test kit claims that it can test at only 11 days post exposure - is this true? (by the way, I was out 6 months past exposure so this is not really an issue for me but it may be important to others)

Thanks very very much for your support in this forum. You are really great people for taking the time to and effort in supporting others. 



Offline AsiaGuy

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  • Posts: 4
how to tell.....
« Reply #7 on: January 01, 2010, 07:57:31 PM »
Dear anyone…..please please help me. I am a mental wreck!! My days/nights everything is consumed by what I may have done to my partner – the sweetest most beautiful girl in the word who hasn’t hurt a fly…and I think I’ve hurt her!!
I have had HIV anxiety for several years now, it started with an incident in China of receiving unprotected oral sex.  I overcame that by convincing myself it was low risk, but learnt to ALWAYS have protected sex, whatever it may be.
A few months later though, there was another incident and the numerous symptoms following that  which I am sure I contracted HIV from.
In beginning June 2006 I got extremely drunk and took home 2 Thai CSWs (I live in asia) and had anal sex with both of them. They said condoms were not necessary but I always insist on safe sex and had actually gone out to buy at several of them. I was extremely intoxicated but do recall using them, in every single instance. I was still single at that point in time.
About 4 days later I started feeling extremely lightheaded and started browsing the net regarding the symptoms. That then consume the next several months of my life. I went to several doctors who all said my lymph nodes were not swollen, and I did not have thrush. I also did not have a fever at all for even 6 months. I did have quite severe arthralgia and myalgia the whole time…. I was evaluating myself every few minutes in the bathroom….
I tested 10 days post exposure and antibodies as well as p24 came back negative…. About 6 months later I tested twice using an over the counter test kit where I lived called Vscan, by a company called medical services international…. I do not think they exist anymore and I I think it was a fraud.
Now, three and a half years later I have had two cases of herpes zoster, fungal toenail infections  and peripheral neuropathy….
I have already concluded that I am HIV positive. I have to tell my partner but am struggling with every aspect of this finding….

Offline Ann

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  • It just is, OK?
    • Num is sum qui mentiar tibi?
Re: how to tell.....
« Reply #8 on: January 01, 2010, 08:19:18 PM »

I've merged your new thread into your original thread - where you should post all your additional thoughts or questions. It helps us to help you when you keep all your additional thoughts or questions in one thread. It doesn't matter how long it has been since you last posted in your thread or if the subject matter is different.

If you need help finding your thread when you come here, click on the "Show own posts" link under your name in the left-hand column of any forum page.

Please also read through the Welcome Thread so you can familiarize yourself with our Forum Posting Guidelines. Thank you for your cooperation.

You tested hiv negative for the incidents back in 2006 because you didn't have a risk, as you've been told.

Are you having unprotected intercourse with your current partner without testing together with her? If so, you both need to test as you didn't know the other person's status.

And by the way, if you feel unwell, see a doctor. Your symptoms are not hiv specific.

You need to be using condoms for anal or vaginal intercourse, every time, no exceptions until such time as you are in a securely monogamous relationship where you have both tested for ALL sexually transmitted infections together. To agree to have unprotected intercourse is to consent to the possibility of being infected with an STI. Sex without a condom lasts only a matter of minutes, but hiv is forever.

Have a look through all three condom and lube links in my signature line so you can use condoms with confidence.

Anyone who is sexually active should be having a full sexual health care check-up, including but not limited to hiv testing, at least once a year and more often if unprotected intercourse occurs.

If you aren't already having regular, routine check-ups, now is the time to start. As long as you make sure condoms are being used for intercourse, you can fully expect your routine hiv tests to return with negative results. Don't forget to always get checked for all the other sexually transmitted infections as well, because they are MUCH easier to transmit than hiv.

Use condoms for anal or vaginal intercourse, correctly and consistently, and you will avoid hiv infection. It really is that simple!

Condoms are a girl's best friend

Condom and Lube Info  

"...health will finally be seen not as a blessing to be wished for, but as a human right to be fought for." Kofi Annan

Nymphomaniac: a woman as obsessed with sex as an average man. Mignon McLaughlin

HIV is certainly character-building. It's made me see all of the shallow things we cling to, like ego and vanity. Of course, I'd rather have a few more T-cells and a little less character. Randy Shilts


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