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Author Topic: Spread the knowledge not the disease!  (Read 3087 times)

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Offline TLC

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Spread the knowledge not the disease!
« on: December 04, 2006, 03:02:56 PM »
In 1985 my mother and step father were diagnosed with HIV. My step dad was diagnosed with full blown AIDS due to his low T-Cell count. These are the 2 most influential people i've ever had in my life. Told that he would only live for 6 months my step dad decided to not listen to the negative words coming out of the doctor's mouth. We packed up and moved to San Francisco. Every single day they conference call all of their resources to find a cure! They were set on finding that cure. We look all over the world but could only find  treatments, no cure. Although it would have been easy to let AIDS ruin our lives we embraced each day we were given. Those were some of the fondest memories I have. I knew daddy and mommy were sick but I was at this point too young to realize their sickness would inevitably end in death. In 1991, my step dad, consumed with this disease, passed away. I was 9 years old and finally realized what happened to daddy would also happen to mommy. Stricken with grief my mom and I packed up and moved back to the east coast. My mother being the smart woman she was decided to start telling her story to students in colleges all around Georgia. It was a story of an "All American Girl" who fell in love with an "All American Boy" who happened, unknowingly, to have a deadly virus. All she wanted was to tell her story and watch her daughter grow into a woman. Her goal was to live until I turned 18 years old. In May of 2000 I turned 18. In August of 2000 my mom celebrated her 41st birthday. She had reached her goal! She made it! We celebrated Thanksgiving with a beautiful dinner. The next morning I heard her fall, so I jumped out of bed and ran to her room. "Are you alright" I said. She told me just to help her to the bathroom and she would be fine. I did as I was told. My grandfather came to see us later that same morning. He wanted to give me a little break. I went and ate breakfast but by the time I returned I saw that she was not doing so well. She was going into cardiac and respiratory arrest. I was instructed by her previously to not resuscitate her if she needed it. I called 911 and was able to keep her alive until the paramedics got to our home. I did not tell them about the DO NOT RESUSCITATE form that laid in her bedside table. I had to try to save her! I was not ready for this! I am too young to lose her now! So I watched as paramedics tried to assess that situation at hand. Her heartbeat stopped for 8 long minutes. Someone came over to me and told me that she was gone. I fell to my knees and screamed "MOMMY"!!! At that moment, no sooner or later, her heart stared to beat again. There might be some sort of hope for her yet I thought. Down the stairs and out of the house she was rushed to the hospital. I followed behind them. She was put on life support as soon as she got there. We monitored her all throughout the night but she was have seizures that were making her more and more brain dead. I had to make the hardest decision I have ever made in my life; I took her off life support. The nurses told me she could only live for 10 to 20 minutes at the most. 36 hours later her heart was still beating. During this time I had 3 conversations with her. She never regained consciousness but all 3 times I talked to her alone tears streamed out of her eyes. I knew she was stubborn and would not leave this earth unless I was okay with it. So, I got into the bed with her one last time and told her that it was okay to go. I could not watch her suffer anymore. I let my grandmother, my grandfather and my grandmother's boyfriend stay in the room with her while I went home to sleep for a little bit. Before I left I looked at my beautiful mother and told her to go while I was gone. The phone rang at 5 a.m. It was my grandmother. She told me that my mom's heartbeat was slowly dropping and she wanted me to come back. I said I'll be there but I took my time because I knew she would not let go if I was there. I arrived @ 5:30 to a room with my mother's lifeless body. She went onto the place where she was no longer sick. I held her and didn't ever want to let go. All this time she thought I was the strong one but I knew that it was her that was strong! Now I spread her story; SPREAD THE KNOWLEDGE NOT THE DISEASE!


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