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Author Topic: Ex-worried - TS CSW oral experience  (Read 1041 times)

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Offline Ex-worried

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Ex-worried - TS CSW oral experience
« on: June 19, 2014, 05:15:47 PM »
Hello, I will begin this thread by describing my experience. I am a heterosexual male in my thirties living in Mexico that wanted to experiment something different. On an academic background, I am a lawyer with an LLM degree from a good school in USA (not bragging, just got reminded of a thread where Ann told a guy “you have a masters degree and can’t understand there was no risk” lol)

More than 3 months ago i had a sexual liaison with a TS CSW which consisted in insertive oral sex and insertion of my own sex toy. I always thought that insertive oral sex was a no risk scenario, however, considering this new situation i ended up being very concerned about HIV.

A few days after the event, I contacted my family doctor who actually told me this was a no risk situation - he actually laughed at me and told me it was guilt for cheating on my gf and my first time encounter with a TS -, but that did not put my mind at ease, so i contacted an infectious disease doctor, who told me that my chances were between none to very very slim.

That also did not put my mind at ease. Then I went to an urologist who told me that my chances were not that slim, and that HIV is not detected until 5 years!! Can you believe this? I guess not everyone is as informed, but this was unbelievable. This doctor actually performed surgery on my dad for prostate cancer. Now I know he could have killed him, being so incompetent. This obviously fueled my fears.

I discovered this forum 2 weeks after and kept reading it for a lot of time - actually I think I have read all of it  - and then it hit me " I am a worried well", so I decided to do something about it. After one month I began exercising - a lot, actually training for a marathon now - and everything was better, I only had some panic attacks that I was able to control by taking very very very long and deep breaths - also I read some threads but found it did not help me at all (nothing against the information you provide, but I discovered reading threads was only a temporary solution). I did not have any symptoms, except for muscle pain which can be attributed to running, stress or anything else.

Also during this period I talked about my situation to a lot of friends which calmed me a lot, however I discovered they have no freak** idea of hiv transmission.

One actually told me that HIV is detected the next day, and that the only risk is if the CSW actually blows in the urethra. Complete nonsense (actually convinced this friend to get tested and negative - luckily, he is really sexually active).

Another fried who is in med school, told me the only risk is if you cum in her mouth, because if the fluids are mixed then I am in trouble. Additionally, he told me that hiv testing is performed as follows: (I) get hiv tested, (ii) if its positive, then return in 6 months for another test, (iii) if its negative, then you are free. He didn't actually know about window periods. In think he should quit med school lol...

After three months (actually 100 days) it hit me "OMG I should get tested" "I am infected" " "what am I going to do??” So I did, went to a good private lab in Mexico City ("laboratorios chopo") and took what I think - actually the lab told me, but no so sure - was a third generation VIH blood test via chemiluminescence (damn word), which as the members of this forum suspected was a complete and utter NEGATIVE! (tested for all STD’s, and hep A, B and C all negative).

The next day after receiving my results, I booked a trip to Cancun with my gf - after neglecting sex with her for 3 months - and now I think I am finally moving on. However, I have still a lingering doubt in my mind; hope you guys can clarify it for me:

(i) The chemiluminescence method is a third generation test? The lab and CENSIDA (national hiv agency in Mexico confirmed me that at 90 days i am clear, but this doubt still lingers); and

(ii) Can i continue having unprotected sex with my gf? At the beginning of our relationship (more than 3 years ago we both got tested for everything and at least she is monogamous - so ashamed of myself).

I really really want to thank you Jkinatl2, Jeff, Ann, Andy, Rapidrod, Matty (hope i am not missing anyone). You guys are real angels and the service you provide is invaluable, and is one of the most incredible practices i have found in my life. I hope one day i can meet you all and give you a hug! I will forever be in your debt, so if you think I can give you a hand with anything, please let me know. And if someday you come to Mexico, please let me know if I can help you. I really consider you my friends now…

I really hope all of you live a really happy life and you continue to help all of this worried wells, as well as the people infected with such a horrible disease. From my side, I will set a dinner with all of my ignorant friends to talk about this experience and advise them on safer practices, and will always use a condom when outside my relationship (hope doesn't happen again but if it does, I will be sure it is protected).

To all of my worried wells – with no risk situation - colleagues out there I give you the following recommendation. If the members of this forum say no risk, then it is NO RISK. I promise you they are not here to calm you down, their purpose is to stop this disease, so you can trust them. Exercise. Sleep. Party. Work. Read. Stop with the google. Have dinner. Continue to live. Life is wonderful, it is a wonderful adventure filled with many great things, experiences and people (such as the experts of this forum). Love. Laugh. Be safe. Forgive yourselves. Don't be ashamed of what you did. As Rocky Balboa said, "life is not about how hard you hit, is about hoy you can get hit and keep moving forward". Use a condom. Oh… and wear sunscreen lol

So I say goodbye to you, wishing you the best of luck and a joyful life. 

Sorry for the long post but I needed to get it of my chest.

Warm regards,


Offline Jeff G

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Re: Ex-worried - TS CSW oral experience
« Reply #1 on: June 19, 2014, 05:37:01 PM »
Thanks for the glowing review !

Your test was reliable and you can count on them . You did not have a risk for HIV and do not have HIV ... as you already know .

Here's what you need to know in order to avoid hiv infection:

You need to be using condoms for anal or vaginal intercourse, every time, no exceptions until such time as you are in a securely monogamous relationship where you have both tested for ALL sexually transmitted infections together.

To agree to have unprotected intercourse is to consent to the possibility of being infected with an STI. Sex without a condom lasts only a matter of minutes, but hiv is forever.

Have a look through the condom and lube links in my signature line so you can use condoms with confidence.

Although you did not have a risk and do not need to test for this specific incident , anyone who is sexually active should be having a full sexual health care check-up, including but not limited to hiv testing, at least once a year and more often if unprotected intercourse occurs.

If you aren't already having regular, routine check-ups, now is the time to start. As long as you make sure condoms are being used for intercourse, you can fully expect your routine hiv tests to return with negative results.

Don't forget to always get checked for all the other sexually transmitted infections as well, because they are MUCH easier to transmit than hiv. Some of the other STIs can be present with no obvious symptoms, so the only way to know for sure is to test.

Use condoms for anal or vaginal intercourse, correctly and consistently, and you will avoid hiv infection. It really is that simple!
HIV 101 - Basics
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