Welcome, Guest. Please login or register.
November 18, 2017, 07:35:14 AM

Login with username, password and session length

  • Total Members: 31843
  • Latest: conanyx
  • Total Posts: 722394
  • Total Topics: 58699
  • Online Today: 290
  • Online Ever: 1421
  • (August 13, 2016, 05:18:44 AM)
Users Online


Welcome to the POZ Community Forums, a round-the-clock discussion area for people with HIV/AIDS, their friends/family/caregivers, and others concerned about HIV/AIDS.  Click on the links below to browse our various forums; scroll down for a glance at the most recent posts; or join in the conversation yourself by registering on the left side of this page.

Privacy Warning:  Please realize that these forums are open to all, and are fully searchable via Google and other search engines. If you are HIV positive and disclose this in our forums, then it is almost the same thing as telling the whole world (or at least the World Wide Web). If this concerns you, then do not use a username or avatar that are self-identifying in any way. We do not allow the deletion of anything you post in these forums, so think before you post.

  • The information shared in these forums, by moderators and members, is designed to complement, not replace, the relationship between an individual and his/her own physician.

  • All members of these forums are, by default, not considered to be licensed medical providers. If otherwise, users must clearly define themselves as such.

  • Forums members must behave at all times with respect and honesty. Posting guidelines, including time-out and banning policies, have been established by the moderators of these forums. Click here for “Am I Infected?” posting guidelines. Click here for posting guidelines pertaining to all other POZ community forums.

  • We ask all forums members to provide references for health/medical/scientific information they provide, when it is not a personal experience being discussed. Please provide hyperlinks with full URLs or full citations of published works not available via the Internet. Additionally, all forums members must post information which are true and correct to their knowledge.

  • Product advertisement—including links; banners; editorial content; and clinical trial, study or survey participation—is strictly prohibited by forums members unless permission has been secured from POZ.

To change forums navigation language settings, click here (members only), Register now

Para cambiar sus preferencias de los foros en español, haz clic aquí (sólo miembros), Regístrate ahora

Finished Reading This? You can collapse this or any other box on this page by clicking the symbol in each box.

Author Topic: Bizarre conflicting thoughts about my future life  (Read 1718 times)

0 Members and 1 Guest are viewing this topic.

Offline wolfthorn

  • Member
  • Posts: 88
Bizarre conflicting thoughts about my future life
« on: August 16, 2013, 12:04:50 AM »
Right now, in the course of the day, I manage to check out websites for arctic adventures, plan for retirement, and shop for coffins ( I refuse to spend my last hours prior to cremation in a box that doesn't fit my height)  and oncologists.

I feel better because my viral load is probably down, but this whole thing is so anxiety generating...  I haven't had a good natural night of sleep in a month.

I guess I am at an in between time. Not in shok but not adjusted either.
7/10/13: Oraquick at Home (+)
7/11/13: CD4 <20, VL 286,000
7/26/13: Start Stribild, Bactrim, Azithromycin
8/13/13: CD4 64, VL 1194
9/11/13: CD4 87, VL 511
10/14/13: CD4 164, VL 34
10/15/13: Stop Azithromycin!

Offline Peterdenmark

  • Member
  • Posts: 81
Re: Bizarre conflicting thoughts about my future life
« Reply #1 on: August 16, 2013, 05:43:01 PM »

Just wanted to tell I truly understand You, because I share many of your thoughts.
Not ready to die, not ready to live - not yet

Waiting for numbers to improve - and hoping for the best.
But, having said that, we always need to show strength.

And, this forum helps me not feeling all alone :)

Looking for places too, I will visit when my doc allow me to travel again. Not the arctic though, I prefer Thailand ;D

Wish u all the best

Warm thoughts from Denmark



Terms of Membership for these forums

© 2017 Smart + Strong. All Rights Reserved.   terms of use and your privacy
Smart + Strong® is a registered trademark of CDM Publishing, LLC.