Welcome, Guest. Please login or register.
January 23, 2018, 01:13:46 PM

Login with username, password and session length

  • Total Posts: 725476
  • Total Topics: 59145
  • Online Today: 321
  • Online Ever: 1421
  • (August 13, 2016, 05:18:44 AM)
Users Online


Welcome to the POZ Community Forums, a round-the-clock discussion area for people with HIV/AIDS, their friends/family/caregivers, and others concerned about HIV/AIDS.  Click on the links below to browse our various forums; scroll down for a glance at the most recent posts; or join in the conversation yourself by registering on the left side of this page.

Privacy Warning:  Please realize that these forums are open to all, and are fully searchable via Google and other search engines. If you are HIV positive and disclose this in our forums, then it is almost the same thing as telling the whole world (or at least the World Wide Web). If this concerns you, then do not use a username or avatar that are self-identifying in any way. We do not allow the deletion of anything you post in these forums, so think before you post.

  • The information shared in these forums, by moderators and members, is designed to complement, not replace, the relationship between an individual and his/her own physician.

  • All members of these forums are, by default, not considered to be licensed medical providers. If otherwise, users must clearly define themselves as such.

  • Forums members must behave at all times with respect and honesty. Posting guidelines, including time-out and banning policies, have been established by the moderators of these forums. Click here for “Am I Infected?” posting guidelines. Click here for posting guidelines pertaining to all other POZ community forums.

  • We ask all forums members to provide references for health/medical/scientific information they provide, when it is not a personal experience being discussed. Please provide hyperlinks with full URLs or full citations of published works not available via the Internet. Additionally, all forums members must post information which are true and correct to their knowledge.

  • Product advertisement—including links; banners; editorial content; and clinical trial, study or survey participation—is strictly prohibited by forums members unless permission has been secured from POZ.

To change forums navigation language settings, click here (members only), Register now

Para cambiar sus preferencias de los foros en español, haz clic aquí (sólo miembros), Regístrate ahora

Finished Reading This? You can collapse this or any other box on this page by clicking the symbol in each box.

Welcome to Am I Infected

Welcome to the "Am I Infected?" POZ forum.

New members -- those who have posted three or fewer messages -- are permitted to post questions and responses, free of charge (make them count!). Ongoing participation in the "Am I Infected?" forum -- posting more than three questions or responses -- requires a paid subscription.

A seven-day subscription is $9.99, a 30-day subscription is $14.99 and a 90-day subscription is $24.99.

Anyone who needs to post more than three messages in the "Am I Infected?" forum -- including past, present and future POZ Forums members -- will need to subscribe, with secure payments made via PayPal.

There will be no charge to continue reading threads in the "Am I Infected?" forum, nor will there be a charge for participating in any of the Main Forums; Meds, Mind, Body & Benefits; and Off Topic Forums. Similarly, all POZ pages, including our "HIV Transmission and Risks" and "Am I Infected? (A Guide to Testing for HIV)" basics, will remain accessible to all.

NOTE: HIV testing questions will still need to be posted in the "Am I Infected?" forum; attempts to post HIV symptoms or testing questions in any other forums will be considered violations of our rules of membership and subject to time-outs and permanent bans.

To learn how to upgrade your Forums account to participate beyond three posts in the "Am I Infected?" Forum, please click here.

Thank you for your understanding and future support of the best online support service for people living with, affected by and at risk for HIV.

Author Topic: Risk after Oral w/o ejac & Penis to Penis contact. VERY swollen nodes.  (Read 2393 times)

0 Members and 1 Guest are viewing this topic.

Offline myname3

  • Standard
  • Member
  • Posts: 3
I'm scared beyond all comprehension regarding a recent exposure. The line for me is still blurry regarding HIV and oral transmission. Doctors have quoted 1/1000, 1/2500, 1/5000, some website such as this one state is does happen but rarely, but the forums here say it doesn't happen. When people quote that it doesn't happen they post studies that were done between serodiscordant couples - which leads me to believe they were on meds and therefor had lower VL. So I'm not finding much reassurance. Regarding rubbing penises together, I've found little information at all.

- I performed oral on 2 occasions (hours apart, same partner)
- rubbed/massaged our penises together, independently as we kissed and by wrapping either my hand or his around them and masturbating as we kissed
- I'm cut, he's not
- May have shaved my pubic region on the morning or the days prior. Could have had shaving rash/shaving nicks?
- 23 days ago
- brushed my teeth at least 3-4 hours prior. Since eaten food and drank alcohol
- first instance <5 minutes
- second instance <10 minutes
- no ejaculation through oral or masturbation
- no precum from him (that I remember), if so it was little
- both drinking alcohol
- No ulcers or cuts in my mouth. Previously had VERY sore lips around this time, raw in parts. If I recall they had healed by this time
- Noticed a very slight inflammation above my front tooth,  don't believe this was present at the time. This isn't an 'open wound' - pressing a tissue against it does not draw blood. But it does seem aggravated. This was noticed 2.5 weeks after the encounter, I don't think it was present then

Since the event:

- felt fine until 14 days later. Swollen node on the front right jaw (I believe submandibular)
- 21 days later, (submandibular) nodes swelled more. Now visible without touch. Right jaw is completely swollen, unable to feel my jaw. Jawline now visible due to swelling, and I'm NOT skinny
- partner assured me he was 'fine', now admits to not having been tested in 6 months and has been traveling the world that time. Says he's been safe but I don't believe him
- no other symptoms I'm aware of, slightly sore throat on 2 separate days which disappeared within hours

Doctors have told me the risk is low, but not impossible. When I've asked have they witnessed conversion from only oral, they've said no. I'm unable to find anything else to explain my severe node swelling.

I had a test last Friday (21 days post exposure, 7 days since initial node swelling, day of extreme swelling) but won't have the results until this coming Wednesday/Thursday. I was tested for gonorrhoea (as an explanation for node swelling?) and HIV via AG and AB.

I've read that the submandibular nodes swell with gonorrhoea infections and that the epitrochlear nodes usually swell with HIV infection, and to my knowledge, the epitrochlear nodes are not swollen.

I had posted this Q on another websites forum, they've now closed the conversation BEFORE I added that we rubbed our penises together, hence registering here. I've been racking my brain and that's absolutely everything that occurred, apart from kissing which I know has me at 0 risk.

Offline Ann

  • Administrator
  • Member
  • Posts: 28,138
  • It just is, OK?
    • Num is sum qui mentiar tibi?

You haven't had a risk and you do not need further hiv testing.

Here's what you need to know in order to avoid hiv infection:

You need to be using condoms for anal or vaginal intercourse, every time, no exceptions until such time as you are in a securely monogamous relationship where you have both tested for ALL sexually transmitted infections together.

To agree to have unprotected intercourse is to consent to the possibility of being infected with an STI. Sex without a condom lasts only a matter of minutes, but hiv is forever.

Have a look through the condom and lube links in my signature line so you can use condoms with confidence.

Anyone who is sexually active should be having a full sexual health care check-up, including but not limited to hiv testing, at least once a year and more often if unprotected intercourse occurs.

If you aren't already having regular, routine check-ups, now is the time to start. As long as you make sure condoms are being used for intercourse, you can fully expect your routine hiv tests to return with negative results.

Don't forget to always get checked for all the other sexually transmitted infections as well, because they are MUCH easier to transmit than hiv. Some of the other STIs can be present with no obvious symptoms, so the only way to know for sure is to test.

Use condoms for anal or vaginal intercourse, correctly and consistently, and you will avoid hiv infection. It really is that simple!

Condoms are a girl's best friend

Condom and Lube Info  

"...health will finally be seen not as a blessing to be wished for, but as a human right to be fought for." Kofi Annan

Nymphomaniac: a woman as obsessed with sex as an average man. Mignon McLaughlin

HIV is certainly character-building. It's made me see all of the shallow things we cling to, like ego and vanity. Of course, I'd rather have a few more T-cells and a little less character. Randy Shilts

Offline myname3

  • Standard
  • Member
  • Posts: 3
Thank you for your response Ann, I was hoping to hear from you.

I am very switched on about what precautions I need to take to be safe, and much of that comes from reading your posts years ago.

Have you witnessed anyone having these symptoms (only a very swollen node in one area) and later being diagnosed with HIV; or indeed gonorrhoea and that being the responsible factor?

Was my research regarding which nodes swell correct in your experience?

How reliable could I consider this test, when the results return?

Thank you.

Thank you.

Offline myname3

  • Standard
  • Member
  • Posts: 3

You haven't had a risk and you do not need further hiv testing.


Might I request that this thread be kept open until I am able to post conclusive - hopefully negative - results, to benefit both myself and others.

I'd also greatly appreciate the input of others on my Q's above re: gonorrhea and my lymph node swelling.

Offline jkinatl2

  • Member
  • Posts: 6,007
  • Doo. Dah. Dipp-ity.
Might I request that this thread be kept open until I am able to post conclusive - hopefully negative - results, to benefit both myself and others.

I'd also greatly appreciate the input of others on my Q's above re: gonorrhea and my lymph node swelling.

This thread will remain open, but you have used up your three free posts. You will have to buy a subscription to keep on posting.

As for others' input, you will find no deviation from Ann's advice. Those of us who are permitted to give risk assessment on this forum are all on the same page regarding HIV/STD transmission.

"Many people, especially in the gay community, turn to oral sex as a safer alternative in the age of AIDS. And with HIV rates rising, people need to remember that oral sex is safer sex. It's a reasonable alternative."

-Kimberly Page-Shafer, PhD, MPH

Welcome Thread


Terms of Membership for these forums

© 2017 Smart + Strong. All Rights Reserved.   terms of use and your privacy
Smart + Strong® is a registered trademark of CDM Publishing, LLC.