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Author Topic: please reply  (Read 1508 times)

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Offline worried-guy

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please reply
« on: March 09, 2013, 06:53:22 AM »
firstly, thanks guys for taking the time out to answer these questions.
i am a gay guy in my early 20s and i visited a gay sauna for the first time. i had only had two drinks so i was basically sober so i was careful but still i've been soo worried since because after i went for a smoke in their smoking area, a few guys told me they were hiv positive. i hooked up with two guys there (i don't know their status). i fucked one guy but i wore a condom so i'm not too worried about that. what i'm worried about is that i was rimming both the guys but like REALLY rimming (tongue in as far as possible!) and also fingering them really roughly. is their anyway my nails could have cut their ass then when i rimmed it i could have contracted hiv? what my main worry is, is that i had a big spot on my lips which i popped before i went out that night so it was raw and did bleed a little when i popped it but that was 6 hours before. how long do cuts take to heal idk. also, i was deep throating both of them, is deep throating a higher risk? when i brush my teeth my gums always bleed but i hadn't brushed them for 6 hours

sorry so many questions. it was an out of character thing to do and i am super worried

Offline Andy Velez

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Re: please reply
« Reply #1 on: March 09, 2013, 07:53:59 AM »
Basically you are worrying unnecesarily. The ONLY confirmed risks for the sexual transmission of HIV are unprotected vaginal and anal intercourse. As long as condoms are always worn for those activities you will be well protected.

Rimming is not a risk for transmission no matter what details you throw into themix. However, you need to be aware that other STIs are much easier to acquire than HIV. We advise anyone who is sexually active to at least annually have a full STI panel done and every 6 months is even better if you are very active.

As far as HIV is concerned this time there is no need for testing.
Andy Velez

Offline Ann

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Re: please reply
« Reply #2 on: March 09, 2013, 08:11:45 AM »

I agree with everything Andy has told you, but there is one thing I'd like to add.

This spot/blister you had on your lip is most probably herpes. (up to 80-odd percent of people have oral herpes) Are you aware that you've very likely given these two guys your herpes?

A herpes blister that is very recently popped makes your herpes VERY contagious. You need to keep your herpes to yourself. This means not engaging in oral sex while the blister is forming, when it is newly popped and also while it is healing.

While having an active herpes outbreak while giving oral (rimming or blowjobs) isn't going to increase your hiv risk, it certainly increases the other person's risk of getting herpes genitally. I can tell you - herpes in the anal region is NOT nice.

I suggest you also think about what you may be giving your sexual partners - don't just think about what they may be giving to you.

Keep your herpes to yourself!!!

If you have frequent herpes outbreaks on your lips, you can take acyclovir as a prophylactic. Talk to your doctor about this.

While you're here, here's what you need to know in order to avoid hiv infection:

You need to be using condoms for anal or vaginal intercourse, every time, no exceptions until such time as you are in a securely monogamous relationship where you have both tested for ALL sexually transmitted infections together.

To agree to have unprotected intercourse is to consent to the possibility of being infected with an STI. Sex without a condom lasts only a matter of minutes, but hiv is forever.

Have a look through the condom and lube links in my signature line so you can use condoms with confidence.

ALTHOUGH YOU DO NOT NEED TO TEST FOR HIV SPECIFICALLY OVER ORAL ACTIVITIES, anyone who is sexually active should be having a full sexual health care check-up, including but not limited to hiv testing, at least once a year and more often if unprotected intercourse occurs.

If you aren't already having regular, routine check-ups, now is the time to start. As long as you make sure condoms are being used for intercourse, you can fully expect your routine hiv tests to return with negative results.

Don't forget to always get checked for all the other sexually transmitted infections as well, because they are MUCH easier to transmit than hiv. Some of the other STIs can be present with no obvious symptoms, so the only way to know for sure is to test.

Use condoms for anal or vaginal intercourse, correctly and consistently, and you will avoid hiv infection. It really is that simple!

Condoms are a girl's best friend

Condom and Lube Info  

"...health will finally be seen not as a blessing to be wished for, but as a human right to be fought for." Kofi Annan

Nymphomaniac: a woman as obsessed with sex as an average man. Mignon McLaughlin

HIV is certainly character-building. It's made me see all of the shallow things we cling to, like ego and vanity. Of course, I'd rather have a few more T-cells and a little less character. Randy Shilts

Offline worried-guy

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Re: please reply
« Reply #3 on: March 10, 2013, 10:16:56 AM »
thank you so much for both your responses Andy and Ann.
can i just hypothetically ask a question, say a guy cummed into his ass earlier in the night then i was rimming him, would that make it a higher risk??
also, i met up today with my best friend who i went to the sauna with. we didn't talk in detail about what happened until today and i told him how i was so worried about what happened to me i wrote on this forum so i think to reassure me he told me that he did something "slightly higher risk" (to use his words), telling me that he was fucking a guy (with a condom on) then the boy took off the condom then he fucked the boy for a minute max until the bottom came ("really fast after he took off my condom"). then my friend said he didn't care about cumming and so he came to find me and we left. plus, today he was like itching saying "i think i've got crabs". my concern has knocked some sense into him and he promised to check out this website and your preventation link but he said he won't write a forum post because he thinks he will be wasting your time. is he right about not worrying? i hope so! whats the risk of getting hiv from such a brief time of bareback topping? i know what he is saying is the truth. he wouldn't lie to me. i was acting super calm when he was telling me it all in detail but now i'm worried about him.


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