Welcome, Guest. Please login or register.
November 25, 2017, 04:58:43 AM

Login with username, password and session length

  • Total Posts: 722795
  • Total Topics: 58748
  • Online Today: 311
  • Online Ever: 1421
  • (August 13, 2016, 05:18:44 AM)
Users Online
Users: 3
Guests: 234
Total: 237


Welcome to the POZ Community Forums, a round-the-clock discussion area for people with HIV/AIDS, their friends/family/caregivers, and others concerned about HIV/AIDS.  Click on the links below to browse our various forums; scroll down for a glance at the most recent posts; or join in the conversation yourself by registering on the left side of this page.

Privacy Warning:  Please realize that these forums are open to all, and are fully searchable via Google and other search engines. If you are HIV positive and disclose this in our forums, then it is almost the same thing as telling the whole world (or at least the World Wide Web). If this concerns you, then do not use a username or avatar that are self-identifying in any way. We do not allow the deletion of anything you post in these forums, so think before you post.

  • The information shared in these forums, by moderators and members, is designed to complement, not replace, the relationship between an individual and his/her own physician.

  • All members of these forums are, by default, not considered to be licensed medical providers. If otherwise, users must clearly define themselves as such.

  • Forums members must behave at all times with respect and honesty. Posting guidelines, including time-out and banning policies, have been established by the moderators of these forums. Click here for “Am I Infected?” posting guidelines. Click here for posting guidelines pertaining to all other POZ community forums.

  • We ask all forums members to provide references for health/medical/scientific information they provide, when it is not a personal experience being discussed. Please provide hyperlinks with full URLs or full citations of published works not available via the Internet. Additionally, all forums members must post information which are true and correct to their knowledge.

  • Product advertisement—including links; banners; editorial content; and clinical trial, study or survey participation—is strictly prohibited by forums members unless permission has been secured from POZ.

To change forums navigation language settings, click here (members only), Register now

Para cambiar sus preferencias de los foros en español, haz clic aquí (sólo miembros), Regístrate ahora

Finished Reading This? You can collapse this or any other box on this page by clicking the symbol in each box.

Welcome to Am I Infected

Welcome to the "Am I Infected?" POZ forum.

New members -- those who have posted three or fewer messages -- are permitted to post questions and responses, free of charge (make them count!). Ongoing participation in the "Am I Infected?" forum -- posting more than three questions or responses -- requires a paid subscription.

A seven-day subscription is $9.99, a 30-day subscription is $14.99 and a 90-day subscription is $24.99.

Anyone who needs to post more than three messages in the "Am I Infected?" forum -- including past, present and future POZ Forums members -- will need to subscribe, with secure payments made via PayPal.

There will be no charge to continue reading threads in the "Am I Infected?" forum, nor will there be a charge for participating in any of the Main Forums; Meds, Mind, Body & Benefits; and Off Topic Forums. Similarly, all POZ pages, including our "HIV Transmission and Risks" and "Am I Infected? (A Guide to Testing for HIV)" basics, will remain accessible to all.

NOTE: HIV testing questions will still need to be posted in the "Am I Infected?" forum; attempts to post HIV symptoms or testing questions in any other forums will be considered violations of our rules of membership and subject to time-outs and permanent bans.

To learn how to upgrade your Forums account to participate beyond three posts in the "Am I Infected?" Forum, please click here.

Thank you for your understanding and future support of the best online support service for people living with, affected by and at risk for HIV.

Author Topic: First scare; how worried should (or shouldn't) I be?  (Read 1622 times)

0 Members and 1 Guest are viewing this topic.

Offline kiete

  • New Member
  • Posts: 2
First scare; how worried should (or shouldn't) I be?
« on: March 08, 2013, 10:33:43 PM »
My partner and I discovered his HIV status several years ago and have been living as a happy sero-discordant couple ever since.  Yesterday we had our first 'scare' when a small amount of his semen got in my mouth during oral sex.

I don't have any mouth sores or cuts and I assured my partner that the risks were low, but his worry makes ME worry.  I called my GP for advice but her nurse-assistant didn't even suggest PEP... In fact she was rather too blasť about the whole thing.

My regular 6 month checkup is in the middle of April, too soon to be a definitive 'no'... So that's why I am here, looking to see how high/low the risks are and any helpful suggestions with dealing with the worry when it crops up.

Offline jkinatl2

  • Member
  • Posts: 6,007
  • Doo. Dah. Dipp-ity.
Re: First scare; how worried should (or shouldn't) I be?
« Reply #1 on: March 09, 2013, 12:42:04 AM »
There are two possibilities here:

A) If your boyfriend is not on meds and has a huge viral load, there is a theoretical risk. It's called theoretical because each and every study of serodiscordant couples who used condoms for penetrative anal/vaginal sex but ZERO barriers for oral sex yielded ZERO transmissions.

B) If your boyfriend IS on meds and his viral load is low/undetectable, the risk was the same as sucking him with a condom.

Obviously, if your partner falls in situation A, then the negligible and impossible to quantify with no "in vivo" data risk is yours to decide upon.

If your partner falls within category B) you likely owe him about seven hundred blow jobs.

"Many people, especially in the gay community, turn to oral sex as a safer alternative in the age of AIDS. And with HIV rates rising, people need to remember that oral sex is safer sex. It's a reasonable alternative."

-Kimberly Page-Shafer, PhD, MPH

Welcome Thread

Offline kiete

  • New Member
  • Posts: 2
Re: First scare; how worried should (or shouldn't) I be?
« Reply #2 on: March 09, 2013, 10:14:18 AM »
I appreciate your candor jkinatl2.  I should have mentioned in my original posting that my partner is on a trifecta of meds and his latest results have him at undetectable levels and a CD4 over 400 (though I'm not sure if CD4 is directly related to infection rates)

Obviously we're still going to test at my 6-month checkup in April, and then again a few months later; but I'm going to do my best not to worry and fret.

Offline Andy Velez

  • Global Moderator
  • Member
  • Posts: 31,926
Re: First scare; how worried should (or shouldn't) I be?
« Reply #3 on: March 09, 2013, 11:14:25 AM »
Even as I understand and appreciate the efforts you two make to protect your negative status, I want to say again what JK told you, your risk was really only theoretical. Your saliva contains over a dozen elements and proteins which effectively prevent the transmission of viable HIV.

There have been 3 longterm studies of sero-discordant couples, both gay and straight. There were lots of variations on unprotected oral sex and only protected vaginal and anal intercourse. Not one HIV negative partner became infected.

You do not need to test beyond 3 months after the incident. And testing is strictly for your peace of mind because I would not consider what you had to actually be a real risk.

Andy Velez


Terms of Membership for these forums

© 2017 Smart + Strong. All Rights Reserved.   terms of use and your privacy
Smart + Strong® is a registered trademark of CDM Publishing, LLC.