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Author Topic: Trying to let go and move on  (Read 3931 times)

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Offline hopeful8335

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Trying to let go and move on
« on: November 25, 2012, 02:18:27 PM »
Hello All,

I have been married for eight years and thought that I was in a committed relationship. My husband traveled often for his job and most of his travel was abroad. I found out that during our marriage he has slept with a least 20 different women and some of them have been unprotected. Needless to say I have filed for a divorce and I have moved out. I am posting here today because I have been afraid that my husband may infected me with something. My fears became worst when I developed a  boil on my inner thigh and folliculitis. I went to a local clinic here in my hometown and was tested for HIV with an oral swab. I am not afraid that the test could have given me a false negative because I smoked a cigarette before taking the test and I read somewhere that you should not eat, drink or smoke at least 20 minutes before the test. I called Orasure and they stated that smoking does not affect the test. But I was recently reading about the in home test and when I called them they stated that you should not eat drink, eat, use oral products on smoke 30 minutes prior to the test because this can cause a fall negative. I am confused because I am not understanding how when I called Orasure to ask about the oral test used in the clinic...they stated that smoking does not affect the test but Oraquick stated that it affects the in home test. Are they not made by the same people and aren't they the same exact test???? Also, I read that this test is not accurate in people with late infection. I not even sure if I fit in this category. the last time I was tested was in 2004 when I got married. I am really starting to become quite depressed because I am afraid that when I take a blood test, the results will be different. No one can seem to answer my questions about this test, which makes me more nervous. I came here hoping that someone with knowledge about HIV testing could help me. I don't understand how this test could be considered so accurate when it can't detect HIV antibodies at any stage of infection if someone is infected? Does anyone know how cigarette smoking affects the validity of this test? Does it make antibodies in the oral fluid undetectable? Can anyone explain to me what Oral Mucosal Transudate is and where does it come from? Is this a fluid that is produced by the bloodstream? If this test is just as accurate as a blood test, why don't they have the same sensitivity and specificity.  I am sorry of it seems that I have so many questions but I am just confused right now. I am scared that my blood test is going to come back positive and the fact that I smoked a cigarette and the fact that it has been so long since I had a HIV test that the oral test yielded a false negative. I hope that someone can help me please. I am almost to the point that I just want to give up on life. I don't know what my soon to be ex husbands status is because we are not talking, I do not know where he is and at this point I am just concerned about myself. I would appreciate if someone could please help me. Thank you in advance and God Bless!

Offline RapidRod

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Re: Trying to let go and move on
« Reply #1 on: November 25, 2012, 02:39:26 PM »
Smoking is not going to interfere with your test results.

Offline jkinatl2

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Re: Trying to let go and move on
« Reply #2 on: November 25, 2012, 07:01:14 PM »
Smoking, eating, nor drinking will impact your HIV test.

Assuming your test was three months past your last episode of unprotected sex, you are reliably HIV negative. I am very sorry you were betrayed in this manner, and hope that knowing you are HIV negative will offer a small bit of comfort.

"Many people, especially in the gay community, turn to oral sex as a safer alternative in the age of AIDS. And with HIV rates rising, people need to remember that oral sex is safer sex. It's a reasonable alternative."

-Kimberly Page-Shafer, PhD, MPH

Welcome Thread

Offline hopeful8335

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Re: Trying to let go and move on
« Reply #3 on: November 25, 2012, 07:28:52 PM »
Thank you both for your response. I do not mean to be rude but did you all notice that I stated that this was an Oral Swab HIV test. I am not trying to offend anyone but I am just going through some major issues right now trust. If it doesn't affect the test, is there some reason why they say not to do any of those things 20 minutes prior to taking the test?  Also could you explain to me exactly what is Oral Mucosal Transudate and where does it come from. I just want to make sure this fluid and blood have some type of relation....that way I will not be so nervous about a blood test. I am praying that my blood test will be negative too. Do you all think that the oral swab test is effective even though I have been having unprotected sex with my husband for eight years. Like I said, I know about of at least 20 women...only God knows how many there really are. If he slept with these women unprotected.....thats like me going out and sleeping with 20 different people. I am just really worried that the oral fluid test may have been wrong due to the duration of time since my last test and how long this LIAR has been sleeping with these women. One particular women confirmed that they have been sleeping together since 2002. We got married in 2004...she said that she never knew he was married and she also has a boyfriend on the side too. All I keep asking myself is "what type of people are these" l feel so STUPID...how could I have not noticed this was going on. Thank you all for your help

Offline Ann

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Re: Trying to let go and move on
« Reply #4 on: November 26, 2012, 06:43:24 AM »

OMT is the slimy stuff that sticks on the inside of your cheeks and it comes from the blood via the capillaries in your cheeks, so yes, it is a fluid that originates in the blood and will contain antibodies.

It is rare that eating, drinking and especially smoking will effect an oral swab test. They tell you not to do it for 20-30 minutes beforehand to err on the side of caution. Smoking is seriously not going to make a difference.

As Jonathan said, provided your oral swab test was done at the appropriate time, I also do not expect your blood test to be anything other than negative as well.

The vast majority of people who have actually been infected will seroconvert and test positive by six weeks, with the average time to seroconversion being only 22 days. A six week (or more) negative is highly unlikely to change, but must be confirmed at the three month point.

You need to make sure you've also been tested for all the other, MUCH more easily transmitted STIs. Some of them can be present with no obvious symptoms, so the ONLY way to know for sure is to test.

Please note that you only have one free post left, so use it wisely.

Condoms are a girl's best friend

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"...health will finally be seen not as a blessing to be wished for, but as a human right to be fought for." Kofi Annan

Nymphomaniac: a woman as obsessed with sex as an average man. Mignon McLaughlin

HIV is certainly character-building. It's made me see all of the shallow things we cling to, like ego and vanity. Of course, I'd rather have a few more T-cells and a little less character. Randy Shilts

Offline hopeful8335

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Re: Trying to let go and move on
« Reply #5 on: November 27, 2012, 08:34:24 PM »
Okay....thanks Ann for explaining that to me. Although, I did not swab my cheeks; it was my gums is this the same? I just don't understand why after I have already been tested; I have to get another test. I thought that if you test after the window period...the test results are supposed to be conclusive. Unfortunately...I do not feel this way with the oral test. I have read so many things about how this test misses peoples infections and I also read something on the clinics in King County in Seattle where they had a lot of false negative results utilizing the oral test. I really want to believe my results and move on...but these things on the internet have me doubting. I know that you cannot believe everything that you read on the internet but why would a well respected testing clinic put out a lie on the internet? I am also afraid that because I may have been exposed to something for so long that this might not have been the right type of testing for me. There have also been things that have stated that antibodies in an infected person's oral fluids can decrease over time....I don't know how true this is....but God forbid I am one of these people. I also read about a guy that was rushed to a hospital...he was tested with the oral test repeatedly and received all negative results...but received a positive ELISA blood test. Things like this is what makes people like me go get tested and then come back only to doubt the results. I realize that the internet can be a very dangerous place and full of inaccuracies...but why would people lie about these things. What makes it worse is that no one offers explanation as to why these things happen. I can't even fathom why a test would be used that leaves people with so many doubts and fears. I mean it's already stressful enough to think that you might be infected but whats even worse is to go get tested and then find out that the method of testing that was used may not have been as accurate as you thought and have to relive your fears all over again. Anyway, I would love to hear further encouraging comments that you all may have and I pray that God will bless this world with a cure for this disease soon. I will also pray that he will bless each and everyone of you. I have read a lot of the post hear before deciding to post and you all are truly a blessing to people with the information and knowledge that you all provide and with such kindness. Thank you


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