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Author Topic: HI, nervous question here.... re: infection.  (Read 1151 times)

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Offline hoohoo

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HI, nervous question here.... re: infection.
« on: June 05, 2012, 12:25:22 PM »
Hi there.  Heres my story.

  I just had a random meet up on Grindr. The guy was very nice, n polite. We went back to his place showered etc, and got down to things. We were in a 69 position, I had been giving him oral for about a minute. Not protected. It was a first time Id done that. Usually in a sauna I always put a condom on when giving oral. But I was very horny and went str8 for it.

   So yeah we are going at it, 69 no condoms. Then after about a minte and I had tasted a little bit of precum, I stop, and said, " I know this is a bad time to ask, but are you HIV+?" he replied, Yes.

    I went soft, and froze. My head started running about everything cept sex. Risks, worries etc...

    He then told me that he had been poz for 15 years. His T cells were pretty much normal, and HIV is undetected in blood tests. He then pulled out the 3 tablets he takes a day. 2 of one and one of another. He could see I was freaking out and felt really sick with worry. I had prob deep throated him 5 times, and the rest was just licking n sucking... again, I did that for roughly a minute before I stopped.

    He assured me I did nothing of risk, and would never have put me at any risk. He would normally have told me earlier, but was distracted with other things.

    Am I at risk ?  I feel i can believe him, but you know, at 2:30am, my head is buzzing with scenarios.

   Thanks.  Jim

Offline jkinatl2

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Re: HI, nervous question here.... re: infection.
« Reply #1 on: June 05, 2012, 12:45:40 PM »
There was absolutely no HIV risk in the situation as it was described.
"Many people, especially in the gay community, turn to oral sex as a safer alternative in the age of AIDS. And with HIV rates rising, people need to remember that oral sex is safer sex. It's a reasonable alternative."

-Kimberly Page-Shafer, PhD, MPH

Welcome Thread

Offline hoohoo

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Re: HI, nervous question here.... re: infection.
« Reply #2 on: June 05, 2012, 12:53:12 PM »
OH man, thanks for that. Ive been refreshing the screen waiting for a reply.  I have read ALOT of posts on here and they have reassurred me. But I still think, maybe Im the unlucky one.

    Your time is very much appreciated. Thank you.!!

Offline Ann

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Re: HI, nervous question here.... re: infection.
« Reply #3 on: June 06, 2012, 05:59:55 AM »

You're not going to be "the unlucky one". With his undetectable viral load, he's more likely to make you pregnant orally than he is to infect you with hiv orally. Yep, it's that remote.

You need to assume ANYONE you have sexual relations with is hiv positive and protect yourself accordingly by using condoms for anal (or vaginal) intercourse. It's not the guys who know their status and are on meds that you need to worry about, it's the guys who do not accurately know their status (ie are poz and don't know it) who are the real danger to you.

Here's what you need to know in order to avoid hiv infection:

You need to be using condoms for anal or vaginal intercourse, every time, no exceptions until such time as you are in a securely monogamous relationship where you have both tested for ALL sexually transmitted infections together.

To agree to have unprotected intercourse is to consent to the possibility of being infected with an STI. Sex without a condom lasts only a matter of minutes, but hiv is forever.

Have a look through the condom and lube links in my signature line so you can use condoms with confidence.

ALTHOUGH YOU DO NOT NEED TO TEST SPECIFICALLY OVER THIS ONE SITUATION,, anyone who is sexually active should be having a full sexual health care check-up, including but not limited to hiv testing, at least once a year and more often if unprotected intercourse occurs.

If you aren't already having regular, routine check-ups, now is the time to start. As long as you make sure condoms are being used for intercourse, you can fully expect your routine hiv tests to return with negative results.

Don't forget to always get checked for all the other sexually transmitted infections as well, because they are MUCH easier to transmit than hiv. Some of the other STIs can be present with no obvious symptoms, so the only way to know for sure is to test.

Use condoms for anal or vaginal intercourse, correctly and consistently, and you will avoid hiv infection. It really is that simple!

Condoms are a girl's best friend

Condom and Lube Info  

"...health will finally be seen not as a blessing to be wished for, but as a human right to be fought for." Kofi Annan

Nymphomaniac: a woman as obsessed with sex as an average man. Mignon McLaughlin

HIV is certainly character-building. It's made me see all of the shallow things we cling to, like ego and vanity. Of course, I'd rather have a few more T-cells and a little less character. Randy Shilts


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