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Author Topic: My story: please some advice...  (Read 1749 times)

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Offline Twistedin

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My story: please some advice...
« on: May 14, 2012, 06:09:32 AM »
Last week I had an sexual exposere with a commercial sex worker . We did everything with a condom . The thing what is bothering me now , is that I didnt really look carefull if the condom broke , but the prostitute was very very careful , and we used lube . After the intercourse , I got a handjob with the same condome we used for intercourse . If the condom would hav ripped during intercourse , that wouldnt allow the handjob right ? I mean the condom would have been destroyed even more during the handjob right , and that would be surely noticable ? Becaus I remember I came during the hndjob , and she rolled the condome off with a paper from down 2 above , so also a sign that it didnt broke ? Well I hope for a fast answer , and sorry to bother with such a stupid question .

Some facts:

1. She put the condom on my penis with her mouth.
2. She gave me Oral with the condom, and then we had vaginal intercourse with the same condom :(.
3. Due to being nervous my penis was not fully erect. (Can this increase infection chance?)
4. I am not sure what kind of lube she used. Maybe it was not water based:(
5. She had two children and a 8 month old baby.

Do I need to get tested for this event? I do not think I can mentally handle it. I read a bit on this forum and I see so many people that do not know how they got infected..... I dont want to be one of them....

Offline Ann

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Re: My story: please some advice...
« Reply #1 on: May 14, 2012, 06:29:20 AM »

You are correct. If the condom had broken during intercourse, it would have been obvious afterwards. A broken condom is VERY obvious.

1. Lucky you!

2. The condom during the blowjob was for HER protection, not yours. Getting a blowjob is not a risk for hiv infection, with or without a condom. It doesn't matter if the same condom was used for intercourse - it didn't break.

3. No, not being fully erect will not increase your chance of infection.

4. While water-based lube should be used, the condom didn't break so it doesn't matter what was used during this session. Using the wrong lube does not cause tiny holes, it causes total breakage.

5. Whether or not a woman has children is no indication of her hiv status.


You have to realise that sex workers use condoms for THEIR protection, not yours. They know how to use them correctly. They know what type of lube to use. If it had broken, she would have said so and probably asked you when you last had a sexual health check up. She's doing the work she is to support her family, so she's not going to take any chances with her health.

Here's what you need to know in order to avoid hiv infection:

You need to be using condoms for anal or vaginal intercourse, every time, no exceptions until such time as you are in a securely monogamous relationship where you have both tested for ALL sexually transmitted infections together.

To agree to have unprotected intercourse is to consent to the possibility of being infected with an STI. Sex without a condom lasts only a matter of minutes, but hiv is forever.

Have a look through the condom and lube links in my signature line so you can use condoms with confidence.

ALTHOUGH YOU DO NOT NEED TO TEST SPECIFICALLY OVER ANYTHING YOU DID OR HAD DONE TO YOU WITH THE SEX WORKER, anyone who is sexually active should be having a full sexual health care check-up, including but not limited to hiv testing, at least once a year and more often if unprotected intercourse occurs.

If you aren't already having regular, routine check-ups, now is the time to start. As long as you make sure condoms are being used for intercourse, you can fully expect your routine hiv tests to return with negative results.

Don't forget to always get checked for all the other sexually transmitted infections as well, because they are MUCH easier to transmit than hiv.

Use condoms for anal or vaginal intercourse, correctly and consistently, and you will avoid hiv infection. It really is that simple!


Condoms are a girl's best friend

Condom and Lube Info  

"...health will finally be seen not as a blessing to be wished for, but as a human right to be fought for." Kofi Annan

Nymphomaniac: a woman as obsessed with sex as an average man. Mignon McLaughlin

HIV is certainly character-building. It's made me see all of the shallow things we cling to, like ego and vanity. Of course, I'd rather have a few more T-cells and a little less character. Randy Shilts

Offline Twistedin

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Re: My story: please some advice...
« Reply #2 on: May 14, 2012, 12:42:53 PM »
Thank you Ann. Let me tell you something, this particular event took place 3 years ago... I have been obsessing since the day it happened :(. I had the exact same assesment about the risk but still I can not think rational about it. The "what if's" keep going through my mind. It was my first time I had intercourse and my last. Just cant bring it up mentally to go for a test, tried often but just can't. I think ill go find a good head doctor :)...

Bless you Ann.

Offline Andy Velez

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Re: My story: please some advice...
« Reply #3 on: May 14, 2012, 01:28:13 PM »
Getting some help from a therapist or other professional is a good idea. There's no science-based caused for concern about HIV in relation to your story. But three years is an awfully long time to live under a worry cloud.

Either get tested and collect the inevitable negative result and/or talk to a professional about this unfounded fear of yours. 
Andy Velez


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