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Author Topic: Mind ablaze with worry!  (Read 2667 times)

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Offline unsurethistime

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Mind ablaze with worry!
« on: December 05, 2011, 04:29:17 PM »
First of all a big thank you to the regulars, Ann, Rod, and Andy. Your patience with people here is boundless, and as many of them are essentially saying 'please God, don't let me be like you' I don't know how you do it!

Right, I'm paranoid about HIV. There's no denying it. After every slight risk i've ever had, i've always had those torturous 'what if' thoughts which eventually means I get tested. Basically back in May, I had sex with a CSW in Cambodia and my condom broke. She told me she had HIV and well...that was my travelling experience ruined. 6 weeks to the day after that I had a duo test which was negative. They booked me in for a 3-month test but the woman at the clinic said 'to be honest, you can be 99.9% certain you haven't got it, so I wouldn't worry'. Having felt enormously relieved I decided not to bother with the 3 month and just tried to put it out of my mind.

Which leads me to my next encounter. I got drunk about 2-3 months ago and had unprotected oral 'both ways' with another lad. Now I know about all the studies which show a negligible/zero risk but I had some worrying factors which might go against me. I had brushed my teeth probably 30 mins before. When he came I just sort of tasted it on the tip of my tongue before spitting it out. There really can't have been much in my mouth because I came at the same time and considering myself 99% straight the whole thing seemed suddenly disgusting and i tried to spit everything, my own saliva included, out. Anyway, I got home and noticed a small amount of blood in my spit. OH NO! 3 days later my tonsil developed (and I know that seems too soon to be ARS) white patches and it was painfully swollen. I'd kissed a few girls in a club two days before that so hopefully it was because of that. Since then though, I just haven't been able to get it off my mind, not for long anyway.

So, I know I need to get tested over the first encounter and I'll have to endure that downright harrowing wait for the results yet again. What I'm here for is your thoughts on the second.

P.S. Ann, if you reply, you don't have to worry about the condom copy/paste info. I've lurked here long enough for it to be burnt indelibly into my mind!

Thanks guys and gals x

Offline Andy Velez

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Re: Mind ablaze with worry!
« Reply #1 on: December 05, 2011, 05:32:44 PM »
With a negative at 6 weeks for a low level risk incident like a broken condom, I expect you to continue to test negative.

The oral incident is not one that I see as having put you at risk, so having another extended waiting period to re-test is unnecessary.

I expect you to come out of this ok.
Andy Velez

Offline jkinatl2

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Re: Mind ablaze with worry!
« Reply #2 on: December 05, 2011, 07:20:45 PM »
I am sure Ann has duly noted your request not to copy and paste her information.

However, there have been no stunning new developments in HIV transmission theory in the last couple of years, so whatever we write will be essentially either paraphrasing or a copy and paste of existing scientific information of which you are already aware.

Therefore I concur with Andy. As you probably knew that I would.

"Many people, especially in the gay community, turn to oral sex as a safer alternative in the age of AIDS. And with HIV rates rising, people need to remember that oral sex is safer sex. It's a reasonable alternative."

-Kimberly Page-Shafer, PhD, MPH

Welcome Thread

Offline Ann

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Re: Mind ablaze with worry!
« Reply #3 on: December 05, 2011, 07:40:40 PM »

Well, if my C&P info is indelibly burned into your brain, then you'll know you need to be tested for all the other, more easily transmitted STIs as well. Are you aware that you can get chlamydia and/or gonorrhea in your mouth? Now you do. Get a swab done.

Condoms are a girl's best friend

Condom and Lube Info  

"...health will finally be seen not as a blessing to be wished for, but as a human right to be fought for." Kofi Annan

Nymphomaniac: a woman as obsessed with sex as an average man. Mignon McLaughlin

HIV is certainly character-building. It's made me see all of the shallow things we cling to, like ego and vanity. Of course, I'd rather have a few more T-cells and a little less character. Randy Shilts

Offline unsurethistime

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Two tests yesterday and I'm still anxious!
« Reply #4 on: March 19, 2015, 06:26:29 PM »
Brief background - 2 brief hetero relationships in the past few years where condoms weren't used but I didn't know their status. One 2 years ago and the most recent approximately 5 months ago.

I went to a TH trust Fastest clinic yesterday for a 20 minute rapid test. The first one came up a bit blotchy on the sides of where the patient marker is and the nice woman testing me seemed to put the result under a lot of scrutiny. Cue my agonising panic! She said it looked negative but asked if I wanted another one. Of course I said yes and so we did it again. This time, as before, the control line came up strong red and she said it was fine and negative. But this was after only 7 minutes, not 20. From where I was sitting I could see a faint marker line, not red, but I could see where it was. Isn't it supposed to be completely invisible? Anyway I was reassured it was negative and went away feeling confident in the result.

Today however I get a phone call from the lady saying it was just a courtesy call to check I was ok and that I was being honest when I said I hadn't been with anyone in the last 3 months (which I haven't besides my currently gf who was tested with me and also negative). So now I'm back to that horrible anxious feeling and don't feel I've got the peace of mind I went for. Saying that I really DONT want to go back for another test and put myself through it all over again as I was a wreck yesterday!

So bottom line : first test seemed indeterminate and the second less so but still a bit iffy. What do you think? I have had seborrheic dermatitis and shingles this year and I'm only 26 so that plays in my mind a lot too!

Offline Andy Velez

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Re: Mind ablaze with worry!
« Reply #5 on: March 19, 2015, 07:54:42 PM »
First of all it's a rule of the site for members to keep all entries in the same thread. I've merged your latest entry into your old thread. Please use only this thread for any further entries.

Now your current question...

Results are unclear for all sorts of reasons and don't necessarily mean you'll end up positive. Mainly for your peace of mind I would suggest re-testing just to confirm your negative status.

You also need to stop having unprotected intercourse for whatever reason you have been doing that. You should be using a condom everytime for intercourse uUntil you may find yourself in a securely monogamous situation in which both partners reliably test negative together.

Go luck with your re-test. I think it is likely you will test negative but only the test can give you that answer conclusively.I think that second test was probably correct. 
Andy Velez

Offline unsurethistime

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Broken condom, symptoms
« Reply #6 on: April 10, 2016, 10:47:15 AM »
Hi I can't believe I'm actually here again. I swore I'd never have to be worried about it again after my previous scares. Anyway, 17 days ago I had vaginal intercourse with a female sex worker. The condom split and I instantly pulled out. I mean immediately. 3 days ago I started to feel a sting in my urethra which has persisted until now. The groin lymphs are up and I think my neck and armpit ones are aswell. I have a headache and I'm wondering how much of this is caused by either a real infection or the stress of it all. I had a test at day 15 for chlamydia, gonorrhoea and a rapid his test.

The hiv was negative so at least I have a baseline. The other stds I'm still waiting on the results but I know I have something because it's definitely not right down there. I think I've just been lucky in the past and now it's run out. I'm pretty much having a breakdown and feel like bursting into tears. I never get ill and to be feeling like this 2 weeks after seems much too much of a coincidence.

Offline Wade

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Re: Mind ablaze with worry!
« Reply #7 on: April 10, 2016, 11:04:36 AM »
You were protected by the condom until it failed.  Fact that you were the insertive partner and such a brief exposure your risk was very , very low.
Your symptoms have nothing to do with HIV so relax, and work with your doctor
for them and the other STI results.

Testing guidelines are at 6 weeks past exposure and again at 13 to confirm your result.
All this said, if this is your only concern you can expect a negative result.

Best, Wade
« Last Edit: April 10, 2016, 11:11:06 AM by Wade »
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