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Author Topic: An unexpected encouter with a masseuse  (Read 1827 times)

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Offline dumbjoe

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An unexpected encouter with a masseuse
« on: August 16, 2011, 09:35:07 AM »
Hello everyone, I would like to start off by saying that I think this forum is amazing place to talk openly about extremely stressful and delicate situations.  Thanks to all who contribute and make it the wonderful place it is.

I have been living in a monogamous relationship for ten years and have never strayed.  Unfortunately, I made a huge mistake a couple of weeks ago.  I went to an upscale massage parlor to get a "happy-ending" massage.  The masseuse took control and began massaging my penis, placed a condom on (with her mouth) and jumped on top of me.  I had insertive vaginal intercourse for approximately three minutes (with a woman of unknown status).  Unfortunately, I did nothing to stop it.  Afterwards, (I was kind of in a state of shock at this point, so I don't remember the details extremely clearly) I pulled out and observed that the condom appeared to be intact.  First question:  I do not have a lot of experience with condoms, so I do not really know what to look for when determining if a condom is intact.  If the condom appears to be in place after sex, do I need to worry about tearing or breakage?  The condom was only half way on as well, but did cover the end of my penis, is this a concern?  Second question:  About two hours prior to intercourse, I shaved my penis and pubic region with a razor.  I did not observe any major cuts or bleeding after shaving.  Does this put me at any additional risk (considering the condom did not cover the base of my penis and it most likely had direct vaginal contact)?  Last question:  What is my risk?  Should I be tested for HIV at 13 weeks?  I have been feeling fatigued, extremely tense in my neck and chest, and incredibly anxious since this has occurred.  I think it is most likely due to the stress of the incident (including extreme amounts of guilt) and not any warning symptoms per se, but this has been tough for me to deal with.  I realize that I am probably at very low risk here, but that does not seem to comfort me at all.  All the logic in the world (including all of the great info I have read on this website) seems to go out the window when something like this happens and you are forced to deal with it yourself.  I would very much appreciate any advice/answers.  Thanks again everyone listening and taking the time to respond.

Offline jkinatl2

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  • Doo. Dah. Dipp-ity.
Re: An unexpected encouter with a masseuse
« Reply #1 on: August 16, 2011, 11:13:05 AM »
Your intercourse was protected. You had no risk.

Shaved pubes, rashes, and the like pose NO risk for HIV transmission, which occurs when viable viral particles meet specific cells, found inside the urethra (the tip of the penis). So long as that tip was covered there is essentially zero risk.

"Many people, especially in the gay community, turn to oral sex as a safer alternative in the age of AIDS. And with HIV rates rising, people need to remember that oral sex is safer sex. It's a reasonable alternative."

-Kimberly Page-Shafer, PhD, MPH

Welcome Thread

Offline dumbjoe

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Re: An unexpected encouter with a masseuse
« Reply #2 on: August 16, 2011, 12:19:10 PM »
Thanks for the response.  Considering this has been my only risky behavior I have put myself in (and will most certainly be my last), is there any reason to get an HIV test after 3 months?

Offline RapidRod

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Re: An unexpected encouter with a masseuse
« Reply #3 on: August 16, 2011, 07:43:49 PM »
No there is no reason to test.


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