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Author Topic: Someone I care about  (Read 3686 times)

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Offline eccb

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Someone I care about
« on: April 22, 2011, 02:12:16 pm »
Hi.  This is the first time I have posted anything to this forum.  I have been viewing and just decided to post because I am scared!  Someone I really care about has just been diagnosed.  The CD4 came back as 301.  He is meeting with the dr. next week to get all results.  I guess I am just looking for some answers and opinions on how to support him.  Please give me some insight.  He acts like everythink is ok and I know he is scared, so am I.  I just have so many emotions and questions. Thanks.

Offline bear60

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Re: Someone I care about
« Reply #1 on: April 24, 2011, 12:41:34 pm »
Its all kind of scary.  But dont make things worse by pressing him to talk.
 Did he tell you about his diagnosis?  If not,  then by all means dont press him for details.
The only thing you can do right now is tell him that you will be there for him when he needs you, if he needs you.
Poz Bear Type in Philadelphia

Offline Ann

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  • It just is, OK?
    • Num is sum qui mentiar tibi?
Re: Someone I care about
« Reply #2 on: April 25, 2011, 09:56:26 am »
Hi eccb, welcome to the forums.

Yes, hiv can be scary when you don't know much about it. Thankfully treatments have greatly improved in the past ten years or so and hiv is no longer the death sentence it once was. It's still a serious illness that cannot be ignored, but there's no reason he can't get on with his life and do all the things he planned on or imagined himself doing before his diagnosis.

If you haven't already found the Lessons section of this website, I suggest you click on the link I provided and do some reading.

As for supporting your mate, I agree with Bear that you shouldn't press him to talk about it, but let him know you're there for him. Let him know about this website and the forums and encourage him to join. Talking to others in the same position will help him feel less alone.

And please, do not take it upon yourself to inform others of his diagnosis. It may be tempting, but don't do it. He'll let people know who he thinks need to know himself.

Thank you for being there for your mate. The early days of diagnosis are a roller coaster ride of emotions and it's good to have a trusted friend at your side. He's going to be ok and your support will be a great help to him.

Condoms are a girl's best friend

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"...health will finally be seen not as a blessing to be wished for, but as a human right to be fought for." Kofi Annan

Nymphomaniac: a woman as obsessed with sex as an average man. Mignon McLaughlin

HIV is certainly character-building. It's made me see all of the shallow things we cling to, like ego and vanity. Of course, I'd rather have a few more T-cells and a little less character. Randy Shilts


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