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Author Topic: i just found out, i'm totally lost  (Read 4857 times)

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Offline aschke

  • New Member
  • Posts: 2
i just found out, i'm totally lost
« on: March 09, 2011, 12:26:22 AM »
I just found out that my ex was in the hospital with a AIDS related pneumonia.  he had no idea
and now i just tested positive.  i'm in a new city where i don't know many people
i dont even know how to begin dealing with this.  i just need someone to talk to

Offline thunter34

  • Member
  • Posts: 7,361
  • His name is Carl.
Re: i just found out, i'm totally lost
« Reply #1 on: March 09, 2011, 12:39:18 AM »
Take a breath.  You've found this place, and that's a good thing.  Someone is here all the time.  If not me, there are plenty of seasoned voices here that can help guide you.  Talk.  Someone will answer.  It may take a bit between posts, but someone will answer.

AIDS isn't for sissies.

Offline aschke

  • New Member
  • Posts: 2
Re: i just found out, i'm totally lost
« Reply #2 on: March 09, 2011, 12:57:39 AM »
thank you for the encouragement.  i'm trying to reconcile it all.
i "did everything right".  i was safe when i was dating.  i found a guy i loved and we were monogamous but i guess he brought something along with him.
i can't fault him, he didn't know either.  he said he got tested regularly too...

Offline anniebc

  • Member
  • Posts: 6,174
  • AM member since 2003
Re: i just found out, i'm totally lost
« Reply #3 on: March 09, 2011, 03:32:43 AM »
Hi Aschke

This is my standard reply to those who have just tested positive, I hope in some small way it will help.

Reaction to the results is difffernt for everyone, but over time you will find a way of coping with the virus that suits you and it might be quite differnt from how others deal with it.

No one here will ever tell you it's easy, it's ok to get angry or scared but don't let it take over your life, stress is natural it can actually help some of us get through certain situations but excessive stress can cause you physical symptoms and can damage your immune system further, just find ways to manage any stress you may be feeling, learn to relax and listen to your body.

Of course along with HIV comes anxiety, and one way of tackling this is through information, gaining confidence in yourself and making informed decisions about your future.

Support is very important and you can get this from a qualified ID doctor or family and friends that you trust, and there are many support organizations out there...just make sure whoever you discuss this with is sympathetic ,supporting and non judgmental about your HIV status, those of us who are livign with HIV live with the reality that disclosure might result in discrimination and stigma, so a decision to disclose your status is best done with possibley a therapist who can provide adequate suport..just be careful, once it's out there you can't take it back.

Most important of all you have to remember that being HIV+ does not stop you from being the person you were before your diagnosis.

Take care
Never knock on deaths door..ring the bell and run..he really hates that.

Offline sevillano

  • Member
  • Posts: 43
Re: i just found out, i'm totally lost
« Reply #4 on: March 09, 2011, 04:25:38 AM »

hmm.. what to say? There is not much to say, the most important is that you face with your (our) new situation as fast as you can... i was tested + a month ago... all I can say is that first week after getting the result was MUCH different from lets say this week (a month later) ... I feel much better now, I am able to focus on other things, the fact of being + isnt omnipresent as it was the first week, it has become just a background of other thoughts .. i am sure that even this will change.. gradually....

I am analytical person so my way of dealing with the new "status" is that I try to read about it, to get to know with the disease etc... things are not that bad as they seem to be... but of course, it wont be easy either ...

If you feel like crying - CRY, If you feel like talking with people - TALK to them (to your friends, parents etc) ... do whatever will make you feel better (I even went for my favorite cake, but I ended up just watching it - I had absolutely no appetite)!

I am sure you gonna feel MUCH MUCH BETTER after a few hours, days ...
dec 2010       - tested neg
22.01.2011    - infection
10.02.2011    - tested poz (test of 4th generation)
18.02.2011    - ELISA test poz
                    - VL: 5 mio
                    - CD4: 421 (19 %)
                    - CD3: 1709 (78%)
                    - CD8: 1267 (58%)
may 2011 - CD4: 428 (21%)
                  VL: 250 000
august 2011 - CD4: 398 (24%)
                      VL: 50 000
november 2011 - CD4: 320 (24%)
                           VL: 134 000
09.12.2011 - CD4: 284 (26%)
16.12.2011 - started TRUVADA/REYATAZ/NORVIR
16.3.2012 - CD4: 373 (25%), VL: 459

Offline MiniPozToyota

  • Member
  • Posts: 206
Re: i just found out, i'm totally lost
« Reply #5 on: April 07, 2011, 07:17:35 PM »
Hey welcome to this amazing site with amazing people, everyone here is able to help and support, everyone on is going through the same thing but at different paces, if effects people differently also but everyone knows alot of info and it helps.
April 2010- tested neg.
April 1 2011 -  CD4 346 VL 46856 22%
July 27 2011- Started Atripla
(Meds are good) needed more space to update been UD now for three years. Current down below
Jun 5 2014 - CD4 704 VL UD % 44.0

Offline ppp333

  • Member
  • Posts: 53
Re: i just found out, i'm totally lost
« Reply #6 on: April 08, 2011, 12:05:17 PM »
All I can say is sorry ur here..but here is an extended family..u r never alone! And the individuals on this form are truly great at just listening and giving advice...I was diagnosed in nov and it's still hard at times but don't give up..life goes on and there r a lot of individuals who have had this for a LoNG time and trucking along..sometimes I need to remind myself that..but medicine only gets better and the work being done in this field is tremendous!


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