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Author Topic: mutual masturbation question  (Read 5593 times)

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Offline ParanoidAboutHIV

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mutual masturbation question
« on: October 13, 2010, 05:43:20 PM »
While engaging in mutual masturbation with an anonymous man, I observed that he was rubbing the head of his penis on mine while he was oozing with pre-cum. I am living in fear that I could have contracted hiv or other stds via my urethra from this incident. It has been nearly 5 weeks so I am considering getting an hiv pcr test to set my mind at ease. I'm aware that the symptoms of fatigue and muscle pains could just as easily be from the stress and anxiety. I think you'll assure me that I shouldn't be worried (based on the archives) but I need to hear it direct. Thanks.

Offline jkinatl2

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Re: mutual masturbation question
« Reply #1 on: October 13, 2010, 05:53:07 PM »
There is absolutely zero risk for HIV from the activity you describe.

"Many people, especially in the gay community, turn to oral sex as a safer alternative in the age of AIDS. And with HIV rates rising, people need to remember that oral sex is safer sex. It's a reasonable alternative."

-Kimberly Page-Shafer, PhD, MPH

Welcome Thread

Offline Andy Velez

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Re: mutual masturbation question
« Reply #2 on: October 13, 2010, 06:38:38 PM »
And besides no risk for that incident, do yourself a favor and read our lesson on transmission. You get all the basics there. The only confirmed risk for the sexual transmission of HIV are unprotected vaginal and anal intercourse. That's it. Use condoms for those and you won't have any problems with sexual risk.
Andy Velez

Offline ParanoidAboutHIV

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Re: mutual masturbation question
« Reply #3 on: October 24, 2010, 09:23:27 AM »
I have always been very safe. I have only engaged in insertive oral using condoms, or mutual masturbation. The most recent incident that has alarmed me is due to the contact of the other man's pre-cum with my urethra. Everyone here says NO RISK -- forget it. Every health clinic says "potential exposure, get tested".

WTF? It's like two different worlds apart.

So for peace of mind I got tested at 6 weeks.
HIV by PCR (pending)
HIV QuikTest oral swab -- NEG
Hep panel -- NEG
CBC -- Normal (figuring white count would be up if contracting) any other std

Is the oral swab test sufficient confirmation?

Don't want to be one of those pain in the @$$ psychotics, but I still feel the fatigue, slightly tender lymph nodes (nothing huge), muscle pain in arms and legs.  I really am trying to convince myself it's from all the stress and anxiety. But I guess I must have that definitive NEG test, which means waiting another 6 weeks.

Your thoughts, comments and reassurances greatly appreciated.

Offline Ann

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Re: mutual masturbation question
« Reply #4 on: October 24, 2010, 09:48:51 AM »

I hope the PCR test used was not a DNA PCR as they are NOT approved for diagnostic purposes because they have a high rate of false positive results. Only the RNA PCR test is approved for diagnostics.

Your six week negative antibody result is not going to change as you did NOT have a risk for hiv infection.

When there has been a risk (you did not have a risk) a six week negative is an excellent indication that you are indeed hiv negative. The vast majority of people who have actually been infected will seroconvert and test positive by six weeks, with the average time to seroconversion being only 22 days. A six week negative is highly unlikely to change, but when there has been an actual risk (you did not have a risk) a six week negative must be confirmed at the three month point.

You do not have hiv. As you did not have a risk, you are conclusively hiv negative and do not need further testing at this time.

If you feel unwell, see a doctor instead of chasing an illness you do not have. Whatever is going on with you has nothing to do with hiv. You do not have hiv.

Condoms are a girl's best friend

Condom and Lube Info  

"...health will finally be seen not as a blessing to be wished for, but as a human right to be fought for." Kofi Annan

Nymphomaniac: a woman as obsessed with sex as an average man. Mignon McLaughlin

HIV is certainly character-building. It's made me see all of the shallow things we cling to, like ego and vanity. Of course, I'd rather have a few more T-cells and a little less character. Randy Shilts

Offline ParanoidAboutHIV

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Re: mutual masturbation question
« Reply #5 on: October 25, 2010, 09:39:18 AM »
 ;D Thanks, Ann.
Well, I guess I chose the right User Screen Name, eh?

I guess I was wrong to select the 'qualitative DNA PCR', but guess it doesn't matter anyway other than the $175 flushed down the drain.

Hopefully I can work on getting past the fatigue that I'm dealing with. I also lost my mother to death during this waiting period. Very unexpected and sudden. Continued employment where I work is a serious concern (which made the thought of a serious illness when health insurance is also in the balance a concern). So the combined stress factor has been most unusually heavy in the past few weeks. 

From all the reading on this board, I realize I am just one of many, many persons who have gone, or are in the midst of these kind of fears and concerns. Much gratitude to those of you who give of your time and effort to make the replies and calm people's fears and provide needed education.

Offline Andy Velez

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Re: mutual masturbation question
« Reply #6 on: October 25, 2010, 10:52:55 AM »
Well it sounds like you are dealing with some emotionally challenging circumstances right now. With that in your life it's understandable that you might become unduly concerned about HIV even though you actually have not been at risk.

Hopefully you can get some support including professionally if you need it to get through this period in your life. In any case, like Ann I do not see any cause for concern about HIV nor any need for testing.

Good luck to you.
Andy Velez

Offline ParanoidAboutHIV

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Re: mutual masturbation question
« Reply #7 on: October 25, 2010, 03:54:35 PM »
Thanks for your comment and support.
HIV PCR DNA just came in NEG as well.
(I know it is not really approved for diagnosis, but likely would show something early if a person contracted the virus.)

Just let me state for all the other Nervous Nellys, and everyone who finds themselves scared sh&%less about a "potential" exposure -- THE SYMPTOMS ARE REAL -- you can imagine them all. In fact, IMAGINE is not even a good word for it, as they are there. You feel them. Every damn thing you read about pertaining to SAR symptoms, if you dwell on it long enough, you will have them. The mind is incredible in what it can do like that!

After being reassured here, I was actually more worried about other potential STDs, esp Hep etc. and did get NEG results for Hep, and a CBC that shows WBC is not elevated. But, due to momentary lapse in judgement, my mind went crazy one me (stress, guilt, fear) and I blew over $300 needlessly.

Thanks for the support here.

Offline Andy Velez

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Re: mutual masturbation question
« Reply #8 on: October 25, 2010, 04:07:28 PM »
You're welcome. Time to get on with your life.

Andy Velez

Offline ParanoidAboutHIV

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Re: mutual masturbation question FOLLOW UP
« Reply #9 on: December 04, 2010, 09:54:16 AM »
Just a note to follow up for others who are newly suffering with similar fears:
I re-tested at 12 week mark.
HIV -- Neg
Hep A,B,C  -- All Neg
All other STIs  -- All Neg

Did I really have all the symptoms that had me so scared?
Headache, nausea, joint/muscle pain/ fatigue, etc.
Yes! And I was certain I was going to be the ONE exception.
(I'm one of those people who thinks Murphy (Murphy's Law) was an optimist.)
Clearly they were NOT related to HIV, Hep, or any STI for that matter.
Anxiety, stress, guilt, fear can do incredible things with your head. 
BTW -- I dropped over $500 on all that testing.
But for "peace of mind" I guess it was worth it.
And thankfully I am able to afford it. Many probably cannot.
Andy, Ann, & others: I'm grateful too for the support I was able to find on this board.
Moving on.................

"Dance like nobody's watching;
love like you've never been hurt.
Sing like nobody's listening;
live like it's heaven on earth."
       ~ Mark Twain ~


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