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Author Topic: Should I be tested?- Summer reflection  (Read 2290 times)

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Offline spanishboi

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Should I be tested?- Summer reflection
« on: August 30, 2009, 05:51:59 PM »
Ann or Andy, please tell me what you think.

I am heading back to school this Fall and am thinking of a few “summer flings” that are getting me thinking. (I am gay).

I have had 3 different encounters with men:

Man 1: Met at a gay bar....made out for hours and hours french kissing...no sex.
Man 2: Known for some time.  We also made out and he performed oral sex on me.
Man 3: I met on-line. He is 25.  We made out, and he performed oral on me.  However,...we did have penetrative sex (with me as a bottom).  I do know he did use the condom (I gave him one), but before placing the condom on...he was pushing the head of his penis on my rectal area.  I used some lube and he put condom on. He inserted briefly. Then pulled out.  Took condom off.  (As far as I know, the condom did not break...and he went to the bathroom to remove it and flush it...before I had known if it did.).   I am unaware if condom broke....because I have had  anal sex only once ...and do not know if the condom broke.

Man 3 was nice enough to get tested. He showed me his negative status on paper. 

What concerns should I have for HIV?  What can I do to be safer? Was him pushing against my butt before the condom was on a risk?  Can I get HIV from his precum?


Offline RapidRod

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Re: Should I be tested?- Summer reflection
« Reply #1 on: August 30, 2009, 07:03:37 PM »
At no time were you at risk of contracting HIV in the situations you've provided.

Offline Andy Velez

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Re: Should I be tested?- Summer reflection
« Reply #2 on: August 30, 2009, 07:50:11 PM »
Boi, as Rod has told you, nothing you did put you at risk. "Pushing against" is quite different from being penetrated.

As long as the insertive partner always uses condoms for anal intercourse you will be well protected against HIV transmission. As far as oral sex is concerned, no guy has ever become infected from having oral sex performed on him. You're not going to make history by becoming the first. Kissing is absolutely not a risk either, no matter what details you throw into the mix.

The only confirmed risks for sexual transmission of HIV are unprotected vaginal and anal intercourse.

However, other STDs are easier to acquire than HIV so if you become regularly active sexually then it's a wise move to at least once a year have a full STD panel done.

There's no need for testing nor for further concern on your part about these recent incidents.

Andy Velez

Offline spanishboi

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Re: Should I be tested?- Summer reflection
« Reply #3 on: August 31, 2009, 04:06:45 PM »
Thank you both for timely responses.

As a curious question.  Even though (from what I understand) that pre-seminal fluids are just as efficacious in transmitting HIV as seminal fluids, had I come into contact with any pre-seminal fluids, would the fact that someone has tested negative, and had no other partners in the last 3 months be a certain factor for being negative?

Offline RapidRod

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Re: Should I be tested?- Summer reflection
« Reply #4 on: August 31, 2009, 04:08:34 PM »
You had protected sex. You were never at risk of contracting HIV.

Offline Andy Velez

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Re: Should I be tested?- Summer reflection
« Reply #5 on: August 31, 2009, 06:42:10 PM »
The only risk from contact with pre-seminal fluids is if they are coming out a penis inside of your butt that doesn't have a condom on it. Otherwise they are not a risk.

Depending on your guessing about someone else's status is NEVER a good way to protect your own health. Even well meaning people don't always know their accurate HIV status. So the thing for you to be doing is to always have sex the safer way. As a gay man, that means anytime you have anal intercourse the insertive partner needs to be wearing a condom. It's just that simple so don't complicate the situation unnecessarily.
« Last Edit: August 31, 2009, 06:45:22 PM by Andy Velez »
Andy Velez


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