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Author Topic: what should I do?  (Read 2768 times)

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Offline the_blue_note

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what should I do?
« on: May 26, 2008, 05:09:28 AM »
Hi all there,
First of all, thanks so much for this site. It has given me tons of valuable information, and certainly has helped me a lot.
I've never written before because whatever doubt I could have about HIV, it was already answered in another thread. However, this time I need some advice.
I'm a heterosexual male. My sexual life is not very active but I always use condoms.Since I have never had an stable relationship, I have had routine checks for STD every couple of years or so, last one a year ago. For the moment, everything has tested negative.
The thing is that I am now engaged in a stable relationship (since february). We've been using condoms for vaginal intercourse, with no other practices.
But yesterday, we had anal intercourse without using a condom. She told me that last time she tested for STD was 4 years ago or so, and at that time she tested negative, and that since then she has only had one boyfriend (unknown status) with whom she has had unprotected intercourse. She has yearly checks with the gynecologist (last one a week ago), but the last one with a blood test was 4 years ago or so. She also takes blood tests once a year in the firm she works for, but in those there is no HIV test.
I've talked to her this morning exposing my concerns and she has tried to reassure me, telling me what I have exposed in the above lines.In any case, we've both agreed to take STD tests together this week.
Of course we should have had this conversation 24h before,but what's done is already done and I cannot change it. So, my question is: should I go the hospital and ask for PEP now that's still recent or is it too exagerated? I've read that PEP  has very strong side effects. I don't know if by doing this I am assuming a higher risk than what it's already done.
Well, thanks for the time taken reading this (forgive my english; my mother tongue is spanish) and thanks in advance for your answers.
One last request. Since time is certainly not on my side (I think there's a 72 hour period to start PEP), I would apreciate if you could give me your advice soon.
Kind regards.

Offline Matty the Damned

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Re: what should I do?
« Reply #1 on: May 26, 2008, 06:14:47 AM »
Yes you should be tested for HIV, but the likelihood of you having been infected from this single episode of anal sex is quite low. No I wouldn't recommend PEP in a case such as this.

It's good that the two of you seem to be able to communicate about these matters. The window period for HIV testing is 13 weeks so you should schedule your tests in accordance with that time frame. As you note it would be a good idea for both of you to use this opportunity to test together.

It's important that you practice safer sex until you are certain you are both HIV negative as well as free of other STDs.


Offline Ann

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Re: what should I do?
« Reply #2 on: May 26, 2008, 06:17:30 AM »

No way do you need PEP for this incident. PEP is normally only given to the person doing the penetration when the partner is KNOWN to be hiv positive.

You've got a good plan in place - follow through with it. Go test and collect your results together. Even if she does turn out to be hiv positive, the odds are still greatly in your favour, as the insertive partner, that you will be fine following a one-time unprotected encounter.

Condoms are a girl's best friend

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"...health will finally be seen not as a blessing to be wished for, but as a human right to be fought for." Kofi Annan

Nymphomaniac: a woman as obsessed with sex as an average man. Mignon McLaughlin

HIV is certainly character-building. It's made me see all of the shallow things we cling to, like ego and vanity. Of course, I'd rather have a few more T-cells and a little less character. Randy Shilts

Offline the_blue_note

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Re: what should I do?
« Reply #3 on: May 26, 2008, 11:04:43 AM »
Ann, Matt.
Thank you very much for your quick reply.
We've gone this morning for STD test. The people there has helped us a lot and -more or less- have told us pretty much the same as you have: that chances are much on our favour and that PEP is not an option in this case.
In any case, we won't get the results till next monday, so there will be a few days of uncertainty and "what if...?"s.
They have told us about some places where quick HIV test are done.  I've been thinking about this possibility because we won't have to wait till next monday, and also because in case she tests positive (which I do not think so), I'm still in the 72 hour period to start PEP. The thing is that I do not know if these quick tests are reliable enough (for false positives, mainly). So now I wonder: do you think is a good idea doing one of these?
Many thanks. Regards.

Offline RapidRod

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Re: what should I do?
« Reply #4 on: May 26, 2008, 11:23:57 AM »
If you had done a rapid test you would have got your results in apx. 20 minutes depending on the test. Some take less time than that. Rapid test are FDA approved and are very reliable. If you would get a positive result with any test it would be confirmed by a Western Blot test or an IFA test.

Offline the_blue_note

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Re: what should I do?
« Reply #5 on: September 07, 2010, 07:29:35 PM »

I'm really sorry for not posting in the correct place. I thought I had to open a new thread, since this is a totally different incident. I should've been more careful reading the guidelines. In any case, here it is the message. And sorry once again!

Hello to all.
I need some advice for this situation. A couple of days ago I had sex with a sex worker. She gave me oral and after that we had vaginal intercourse (twice). I used a condom for all those, but I was pretty drunk (this is not an excuse; just information) and when I went out of her the condom was barely on, hanging from the tip of my penis.
I know that using condoms nullifies HIV risk, but since it was almost off, should I consider this situation as a "broken condom case" and get tested or is it not necessary?
Thank you very much in advance for your reply.

Offline Matty the Damned

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Re: what should I do?
« Reply #6 on: September 07, 2010, 07:46:54 PM »
This is not a "broken condom" situation. You were protected all the way through. You were not at risk and you do not need to be tested for HIV.

In future make sure you grip the base of the rubber as you withdraw your mighty tool.


Offline jkinatl2

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Re: what should I do?
« Reply #7 on: September 07, 2010, 07:48:35 PM »
Nope, this is not a "broken condom" case. It is a "barely successful condom" case. As long as the head of your penis is covered, you are good to go.

Of course, like I always say, there are more germs than HIV in the world. A person who is sexually active should be tested at least twice a year for STDs, and why not add HIV to the mix?

"Many people, especially in the gay community, turn to oral sex as a safer alternative in the age of AIDS. And with HIV rates rising, people need to remember that oral sex is safer sex. It's a reasonable alternative."

-Kimberly Page-Shafer, PhD, MPH

Welcome Thread

Offline the_blue_note

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Re: what should I do?
« Reply #8 on: September 07, 2010, 07:55:08 PM »
Thanks a lot, Matty.
I will follow your advice, although I do not feel very identified with your adjectives!
Keep up the good work.
All the best.

Offline the_blue_note

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Re: what should I do?
« Reply #9 on: September 07, 2010, 08:05:29 PM »
Thanks a lot, jkinatl2.
I will also follow your advice; last STD's panel I got was more than a year ago. In any case, hope I don't faint. Last time they took a pint of blood out of me.
All the best.


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