Questions about oral sex

[seattle_guy]

Hi there,

My question has pretty much already been answered in the section on Oral Sex and HIV Transmission, but I'm posting anyway because I'd appreciate a bit of clarification.

I recently had oral sex with another man, and he ejaculated in my mouth. He had already told me his HIV (and other STI) status is negative so I'm not all that worried, but as with so many other people on this board, there's a niggling concern (presumably guilt-induced; I'm married!) in the back of my head.

Most of what I've read here indicates I needn't worry, but I was came across a very long thread in which some people said you CAN acquire HIV by giving head.

So what should we poor, guilt-ridden, confused people believe? Can I get HIV by giving head?

Thanks folks!

[Ann]

SG,

There have been long-term studies of couples where one is positive and one is negative. In the couples who used condoms for anal or vaginal intercourse, but no barrier for oral activities, not one of the negative partners became infected with hiv. Not one. The results of these studies show that giving blowjobs is an unlikely source of infection. The science of hiv transmission on a cellular level also points to this not being a risk, as the mouth is a very hostile environment and hiv is very fragile.

As to whether or not you test, anyone who is sexually active should be having a full sexual health care check-up, including but not limited to hiv testing, at least once a year and more often if unprotected intercourse occurs.

While testing isn't necessary over this one-time incident, if you aren't already having routine check ups, now is the time to start. As long as you make sure condoms are being used for intercourse, you can fully expect your routine hiv tests to return with negative results. Don't forget to always get checked for all the other sexually transmitted infections as well, because they are MUCH easier to transmit than hiv.

The main thing is that you are using condoms for any anal or vaginal intercourse outside your marriage, not only for your own sake, but for the sake of your wife as well. Condoms prevent hiv and other sexually transmitted infections. Use them. Have a read through the condom and lube links in my signature line - think of it as a refresher course.

Ann

[seattle_guy]

Hi Ann,

Thank you so much for your answers -- not just to my question, but to the many questions from the hundreds (thousands?) of worried people who post on this board.

I wonder if you guys know how much your responses are appreciated. When a person is consumed with the fear of infection (often combined with guilt for having cheated on their spouse) a straightforward, informed, no-nonsense, non-judgmental answer is incredibly valuable.

In my opinion, one of the biggest problems with HIV (other than the virus itself of course) is ignorance. Ignorance begets misinformation, which begets fear, which begets intolerance. And you guys are on the front line against the root cause of it all.

So, thumbs up -- and condoms on!

Doug (Seattle_Guy)