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Author Topic: never thought i would be asking?  (Read 2125 times)

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Offline JustScared

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never thought i would be asking?
« on: August 14, 2007, 12:26:06 PM »
    I have been to other websites including this one and have been reading all the posts for over four months now. I can answer my own question, but as testing is near I am getting nervous. So here is a quick story with a request for assessment.
    I started to work in this other country wife still in the states. After a couple of months a did something I regret doing by sleeping with a CSW (april 8th) unprotected oral (no more than two min) and protected vaginal. Guilt and fear started getting the best of me that night. i started looking up different stds and came across HIV and wish i never looked. I told my wife what happened 2 days after the incident and she told me she still wanted to be with me and would still come and live with me over there. well i got a std test done and all were negative 8 weeks did not get hiv test yet. wife moved here in May and we have been having sex without protection, because my wife says there was no risk of anything. well i am going back to states soon and will be getting tested then. Should I be worried? Should I be tested? Just paranoid and still feeling guilty I am thinking!

thanks all and i really appreciate you rapid rod/teak/friend in my prayers!

Offline RapidRod

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Re: never thought i would be asking?
« Reply #1 on: August 14, 2007, 02:32:39 PM »
You never had a risk to begin with and you don't need an HIV test.

Offline Andy Velez

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Re: never thought i would be asking?
« Reply #2 on: August 14, 2007, 04:27:33 PM »
You were not at risk for HIV transmission in relation to this incident. Getting oral is not a risk for transmission.Condoms are very democratic and don't care who you're putting it into. They provide equally effective protection for all.

Guilt is a whole other matter. It's no tribute to your higher character or to your wife to torture yourself over this incident. Nor can you undo it. You're just a dog like the rest of us and you went straying. So I say take a breath, see what occured, accept that, let it go and get on with your life.

This is NOT an HIV situation. Really.
Andy Velez

Offline JustScared

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Re: never thought i would be asking?
« Reply #3 on: August 15, 2007, 01:23:29 PM »
Thank you both for your answers and confidence in my situation. I have never been a stressed person whatsoever, so going through this because of my actions has really broke me down. I never wanted to post because there are people with real concerns and I have prayed for all. I just let this great world of internet searching get the best of me!

Offline Ann

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  • It just is, OK?
    • Num is sum qui mentiar tibi?
Re: never thought i would be asking?
« Reply #4 on: August 15, 2007, 01:54:02 PM »

I deleted a reply you posted in someone else's thread. Don't do that. Read the Welcome Thread and along with clicking and reading the Transmission Lesson link, pay attention to our posting guidelines, including this one:

Only those Moderators and members who are authorized to answer questions in the Am I Infected? forum are permitted do so. Unauthorized responses may be deleted without permission of the poster. Repeatedly posting replies of this nature may result in a Time Out or permanent ban, at the discretion of the Moderator Team.

You need to be using condoms for anal or vaginal intercourse, every time, no exceptions until such time as you are in a securely monogamous relationship where you have both tested for ALL sexually transmitted infections together. To agree to have unprotected intercourse is to consent to the possibility of being infected with an STI. Sex with a condom lasts only a matter of minutes, but hiv is forever.

Have a look through all three condom and lube links in my signature line so you can use condoms with confidence. Use them correctly and consistently and you will avoid hiv infection. It really is that simple!

Condoms are a girl's best friend

Condom and Lube Info  

"...health will finally be seen not as a blessing to be wished for, but as a human right to be fought for." Kofi Annan

Nymphomaniac: a woman as obsessed with sex as an average man. Mignon McLaughlin

HIV is certainly character-building. It's made me see all of the shallow things we cling to, like ego and vanity. Of course, I'd rather have a few more T-cells and a little less character. Randy Shilts


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