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Author Topic: Worried  (Read 3165 times)

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Offline livestrong

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« on: August 07, 2007, 03:15:21 AM »
Hi Guys,

I would like to hear your comments on this one (I have been reading the lessons but my situation does not really fit in to the situations described there). About 7 months ago I had sex with this girl. It was one of those things that is stupid and considered dangerous since we were both very drunk. Anyway, this is how I recall it. During the foreplay she kind of played with my penis around the outer parts of her vagina (my opinion is that my penis never entered into her vagina). A lot of rubbing going on, and I suppose that it is likely to say that some vaginal fluid came in contact with my penis (during the foreplay I did not wear a condom). Later, during the actual intercourse, I wore a condom.

I never considered it a risk situation (or at least a very low risk situation). But like 2-3 months after this incident I came up with some genital warts that I must have caught during the incident. That's when I started to worry as I began thinking that maybe it was not as safe as I had thought (I know that genital warts can be transmitted without intercourse so maybe that could have happened during the foreplay). Looking back at the situation I remember that I had the flu (at least that is what I thougt at the moment) 10 days after the incident. I had a pretty high fever, soar throat, muscle aches, runny nose, cough etc (I do not remember any rash or swollen lymph nodes) and was in bed a couple of days. The fever was gone after 4-5 days but the runny nose and the cough persisted a couple of weeks. Ended up with a sinusitis at the end and they gave me antibiotics.

Do you think that I was at risk during the foreplay, when my penis was in contact with her vagina and possibly vaginal fluids, without any actual intercourse?

I am really worried, feel like a dumb ass, and I am going have an HIV test in about a week since I can't let go of this.

Thank you for your time and after reading around in these forums I can say that you do a really good job.

Kind regards

Offline RapidRod

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Re: Worried
« Reply #1 on: August 07, 2007, 03:44:06 AM »
If you didn't have penetration before putting on the condom then you were never at risk for HIV.

Offline Matty the Damned

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Re: Worried
« Reply #2 on: August 07, 2007, 03:47:30 AM »
No this really isn't a risk situation in terms of HIV. HIV is not transmitted via frottage (rubbing genitals) but through unprotected anal or vaginal sex. Since you used a condom when you had insertive vaginal sex you were protected from HIV.

As for the genital warts, well that's a different matter. HPV (the virus that causes genital warts) can be transmitted via skin to skin contact so it's possible you may have contracted warts from this encounter. Nevertheless, many people carry HPV for a longtime before having an outbreak (some never have outbreaks) so it's just as possible that you contract HPV infection prior to this encounter.

All sexually active people should have a full STD screen at leasts once a year. Twice is better. A full screen will include, but is not limited to, an HIV antibody test. STD's such as chlamydia and gonorrhoea are far more prevalent and transmissible than HIV. If it's been a while since your last full STD screen or if you've not had one before you might consider making an appointment with your doctor or local clinic.

Having said that, I would stress that you do not need to test for HIV as a result of this encounter.

You should also take the time to read our Welcome Thread which contains links to our testing and transmission lessons.


Offline livestrong

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  • Posts: 3
Re: Worried
« Reply #3 on: August 07, 2007, 04:23:29 AM »
OK, thanks for the quick answers.

I guess what really has made me nervous about all this was the flu that I had. When you start to read about these flu like symtoms it is easy to freak out. I understand that you can not interprete symtoms to know your hiv status, but it shure can freak you out when you start doing the maths (10 days after sex etc...).

Take care all of you

Offline Andy Velez

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Re: Worried
« Reply #4 on: August 07, 2007, 09:37:09 AM »
Yes, it can freak you out when there are certain coincidental physical happenings.

But as Matty pointed out, you had protected intercourse. Condoms provide very effective protection. So no matter how your mind is racing with all kinds of scary thoughts, this is NOT an HIV situation. Period. End of story.
Andy Velez

Offline livestrong

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  • Posts: 3
Re: Worried
« Reply #5 on: August 08, 2007, 04:05:00 AM »

Hi guys (I hope I posted it right now),

I have a question, which might not be politically correct. If you have exposed yourself of a risk of getting HIV (many people have at some point in their lives), and lets say that it was not more than a year ago. Couldn't it sometimes make sense to wait of having the HIV test done? From what I understand, in a "normal" case, you would not need meds during the first 2-3 years after infection (although some people would need that). And as it fore some people is really devastating to find out that they are HIV+, it could be better for them to postpone that knowledge.

I also would like to add that I understand that not knowing your status can increase the risk of passing on the virus to some one else, but my question was written with the idea that the person waiting with having the test would use a condom when having sex.

I am sorry if this question offends anyone, but I am sure that many people that are worried about their HIV status have thought about the benefits/downsides of having the test done.

I also hope that this question wasn't inappropiate in the "am i infected" forum. In that case I apologize.

Best regards

Offline Ann

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  • It just is, OK?
    • Num is sum qui mentiar tibi?
Re: Worried
« Reply #6 on: August 08, 2007, 05:06:34 AM »

I can see no real benefit to not knowing your hiv status. Aside from the issue you bring up about onward transmission, there is the health issue. Some people's virus will cause damage quicker than others - hiv will affect different people differently and at different rates. It pays to know.

This is why we recommend that ALL sexually active adults (outside of a securely monogamous relationship where you've tested together) test at least once a year, twice if you're very active, and more often if unprotected intercourse should occur.

Condoms are a girl's best friend

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"...health will finally be seen not as a blessing to be wished for, but as a human right to be fought for." Kofi Annan

Nymphomaniac: a woman as obsessed with sex as an average man. Mignon McLaughlin

HIV is certainly character-building. It's made me see all of the shallow things we cling to, like ego and vanity. Of course, I'd rather have a few more T-cells and a little less character. Randy Shilts


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