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Author Topic: I feel like a superball.  (Read 7451 times)

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Offline aupointillimite

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I feel like a superball.
« on: February 22, 2007, 06:16:19 pm »
Bouncing.  Up and down.

I go back up... but every time I do, it's always a little bit less high than before.

Those of you who talk to me on the phone know that I am natually someone with high energy levels... but what I felt like before diagnosis... God, I was like a F5 tornado... and now, I'm coming in at about an F2.  Still a tornado... but not as strong.

I'm wondering if this is normal.  Two years on, I'm starting to get ever so slightly more tired than I used to... sleeping a bit harder... waking up a bit later... not wanting to do as much.  It's strange... and somewhat disconcerting.

It's almost unnoticeable... but I can tell that my energy isn't what it used to be.  I don't know if it's my body beginning to tell me that constantly fighting this damn thing is beginning to wear it down a bit (as I said in an earlier thread... I've got miles to go, so I'm not worrying right now... just remarking), or if it's the meds... or just the usual trials and tribulations of adulthood... or all three.

But I'm not bouncing up as high as I used to... and it always seems to take an extra day or two of rest every time to get me back up there.

Le sigh.
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Offline jyngfilm

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Re: I feel like a superball.
« Reply #1 on: February 22, 2007, 07:11:41 pm »
my superball is more egg shaped, hence one never knows what the bounce is going to be...could be lateral. certainly unpredictable.  you've had alot of serious shit go down latley, try being more "you"? lighten up brother.
OR>> maybe its just maturing? >>>naw.  :D Ciao ~jordon
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Offline aupointillimite

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Re: I feel like a superball.
« Reply #2 on: February 22, 2007, 07:19:14 pm »
Quote from: jyngfilm on February 22, 2007, 07:11:41 pm
you've had alot of serious shit go down latley, try being more "you"?

I am.

I have decided to venture out for the first time in more than a week and enjoy myself if it kills me.

Which will probably end up with a very drunk me singing a piss-poor version of "Panic" by The Smiths at karaoke tonight... interspersed with vile comments about Parker Posey's vagina.   ;)

Oh yes.
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Offline Nico

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Re: I feel like a superball.
« Reply #3 on: February 22, 2007, 08:03:48 pm »
Benj,
It has been a long month for you.  Give yourself a break and your body as well.  You still have plenty of bounce - I am sure of you do... 8)

Just take some time and listen to "you", your mind and body.  When I listen, I feel much better.  Get a good rest and play if you want, but do not go over curfew- you will be spanked!   :-*

Roger
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Offline aupointillimite

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Re: I feel like a superball.
« Reply #4 on: February 22, 2007, 08:07:21 pm »
Quote from: Nico on February 22, 2007, 08:03:48 pm
Benj,
It has been a long month for you.  Give yourself a break and your body as well.  You still have plenty of bounce - I am sure of you do... 8)

I know... but crazy stuff like this used to take me out of commission for all of 48 hours.  I'm the guy who got over mono in a week, you know?

I've dealt with two moves sice diagnosis, and the first one was easy... but the second a year later took quite a bit more out of me...

And for this health insurance stuff to just lay me low for a full on week is a little depressing, you know?

I'm not used to it... I suppose I will... I'll have to.  But I'll be damned if I don't do this kicking and screaming the whole time.    ;)
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Offline ACinKC

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Re: I feel like a superball.
« Reply #5 on: February 22, 2007, 08:21:53 pm »
welcome to middle age.
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LIFE is not a race to the grave with the intention of arriving safely
in a pretty and well-preserved body, but, rather to skid in broadside,
thoroughly used up, totally worn out, and loudly proclaiming--WOW! WHAT A
RIDE!!!

Offline aupointillimite

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Re: I feel like a superball.
« Reply #6 on: February 22, 2007, 08:26:51 pm »
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Offline ACinKC

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Re: I feel like a superball.
« Reply #7 on: February 22, 2007, 08:36:53 pm »
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LIFE is not a race to the grave with the intention of arriving safely
in a pretty and well-preserved body, but, rather to skid in broadside,
thoroughly used up, totally worn out, and loudly proclaiming--WOW! WHAT A
RIDE!!!

Offline aupointillimite

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Re: I feel like a superball.
« Reply #8 on: February 22, 2007, 08:39:13 pm »
Quote from: ACinKC on February 22, 2007, 08:36:53 pm
Welcome to middle age.

One of these days, Alice...
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Offline jyngfilm

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Re: I feel like a superball.
« Reply #9 on: February 22, 2007, 09:30:53 pm »
POW, TO THE MOON     (while Trixie emulates through Ralph's life)  more rum please
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Offline aupointillimite

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Re: I feel like a superball.
« Reply #10 on: February 22, 2007, 09:32:57 pm »
Quote from: jyngfilm on February 22, 2007, 09:30:53 pm
POW, TO THE MOON     (while Trixie emulates through Ralph's life)  more rum please

THANK YOU!

I was waiting for that... I had held my breath and everything.

You've saved me from non-so-erotic asphyxiation.
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Offline Miss Philicia

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Re: I feel like a superball.
« Reply #11 on: February 22, 2007, 09:37:59 pm »
I thought the thread said "I feel like a speedball"
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Offline aupointillimite

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Re: I feel like a superball.
« Reply #12 on: February 22, 2007, 09:39:51 pm »
Quote from: philly267 on February 22, 2007, 09:37:59 pm
I thought the thread said "I feel like a speedball"

That too.

You know what would make me feel super great right now?

Heroin!

Mixed with speed!

Nummy treat.
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Offline Miss Philicia

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Re: I feel like a superball.
« Reply #13 on: February 22, 2007, 09:42:24 pm »
so... so dangerous

meet me at the Viper Room... I'm bringing Paris!  Tonight's theme is RAF Simons and Bollinger!
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Offline jyngfilm

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Re: I feel like a superball.
« Reply #14 on: February 22, 2007, 10:10:39 pm »
aupointillimite? i thought you were going out for kARAOKE?  to>>/? lighten up?  little known fact. we have a customer who made millions selling Karaoke machines. dont let him down.  whack whack dude
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Offline aupointillimite

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Re: I feel like a superball.
« Reply #15 on: February 22, 2007, 10:13:14 pm »
Quote from: jyngfilm on February 22, 2007, 10:10:39 pm
aupointillimite? i thought you were going out for kARAOKE?  to>>/? lighten up?  little known fact. we have a customer who made millions selling Karaoke machines. dont let him down.  whack whack dude

I am.  I was kidding about the heroin.

I rode that horse a bit too much a couple years ago and have since put him out to pasture...

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Offline jyngfilm

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Re: I feel like a superball.
« Reply #16 on: February 22, 2007, 10:20:49 pm »
oh i dont care about the white horse stories, nothing  i haven/t participated in. i'm probably rumming it up enough to equal many 8 balls of whatever the gent has to spare. hope atripla and sugar cane get along.
gott-a crash now. fill in if sometihing stratospheric happens. Ciao ~jordon
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Offline Life

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Re: I feel like a superball.
« Reply #17 on: February 22, 2007, 10:37:50 pm »
And I thought you guys were up for a game of billiards.... jeeezzz...  :)
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Offline jyngfilm

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Re: I feel like a superball.
« Reply #18 on: February 22, 2007, 11:01:00 pm »
eric, bring johnny to the southern gathering and we'll play "billiards"  > ha. no more rigs though. just lighters
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Offline aupointillimite

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Re: I feel like a superball.
« Reply #19 on: February 23, 2007, 04:48:12 am »
I feel so much more back in my game

Went out.  Saw some friends.

Danced to New Order.  Ruled at life.

Scored some strange.

He was 36 and hot.

Just how I like it.

The universe smiled upon me this evening.

Huzzah!

Good night!
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Offline egello

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Re: I feel like a superball.
« Reply #20 on: February 23, 2007, 05:02:37 am »
hey, i understand what you mean,

since about 3-4 years ago, I have been getting lazier. Lazier about going out, hanging out with friends and meeting new people. I just figured that it was because I met my current b/f right aroudn that time and that it was part of getting older. (btw, isn't mario lopez so hot?)

anyhoo, since starting the meds and with the testosterone gel, things really have changed it seemed. However, I notieced that I have been getting pretty spacey since starting the meds.
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10/3/07 380 T, <50 V, 10 %

Offline Miss Philicia

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Re: I feel like a superball.
« Reply #21 on: February 23, 2007, 08:12:28 am »
What is this thread about?
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Offline Ihavehope

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Re: I feel like a superball.
« Reply #22 on: February 23, 2007, 06:56:26 pm »
Sowwy to hear you feeling old and tired Aupo. I am sure you will be yourself again.

Do u exercise?
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12/6/06 - Diagnosed HIV positive
12/19/06 - CD4 = 240  22% VL = 26,300
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3/13/07 = CD4 = 386 22% VL ?

Offline aupointillimite

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Re: I feel like a superball.
« Reply #23 on: February 23, 2007, 06:58:52 pm »
Quote from: Ihavehope on February 23, 2007, 06:56:26 pm
Sowwy to hear you feeling old and tired Aupo. I am sure you will be yourself again.

Do u exercise?

Thank you.  I do feel much better today.

I don't have a car and end up walking anywhere from 3-5 miles a day... so I suppose that might be counted as exercise.
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Offline marc11864

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Re: I feel like a superball.
« Reply #24 on: February 23, 2007, 07:28:59 pm »
I live for drugs

I freaked out very very badly. I freaked out on acid...

I'm the white rabbit.


OK, name that tune!
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Offline tigger2376

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Re: I feel like a superball.
« Reply #25 on: February 23, 2007, 08:01:46 pm »
Can't name the tune,but many a good ones played on a middle aged trumpet! I am becoming far too intimately aquainted with my duvet recently,get into the tired/can't be arsed because its going to make me feel shit syndrome! Dancing to new order sounds good though,maybe we should have an eighties thread...whats the tackiest song you ever scored to?
On a purely practical note I've found that devils claw homeopathic tablets help with tiredness AND joint pain
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Offline Boo Radley

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Re: I feel like a superball.
« Reply #26 on: February 24, 2007, 12:13:40 am »
Considering how much living you've shoved into 24 years I'm not surprised you notice a slight decline in energy level!! 

By your age I also noticed a decrease in my ability to keep going like the energizer bunny continuously.   I even experienced  the ignominy of falling asleep early on Friday nights instead of partying because I'd partied every previous weeknight.  I probably drank more than you do (at least I hope so or your liver and kidneys are doomed) but I avoided heroin by taking LSD several hundred times... actually, make that about a thousand or more acid trips now that I think about it.  3 - 4 trips a week for 4 years and then 1 or more a week for the next 5+ years.  It doesn't matter as my brain is mush anyway.

When I was younger, in my teens and before, I could easily keep going for hours and hours, cheat on sleep and not feel any effects, party every night and not feel like hell the next day (of course, I didn't begin to drink until after high school, and within a few years of heavy drinking started slowing down...), and in general always had energy.   I was a constant fidget! 

At 51 I have the energy of a 150 year old galapagos turtle. 

Boo
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Everything I do, say, think, excrete, secrete, exude, ooze, or write © 2007 Sweet Old Boo, Inc.

Offline Amosboy

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Re: I feel like a superball.
« Reply #27 on: February 25, 2007, 12:12:04 am »
For marc11846....A DAISY CHAIN FOR SATAN  8)

Can I see what's behind door #3 now?

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Offline jyngfilm

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Re: I feel like a superball.
« Reply #28 on: February 25, 2007, 07:19:23 pm »
Quote from: marc11864 on February 23, 2007, 07:28:59 pm
I live for drugs

I freaked out very very badly. I freaked out on acid...

I'm the white rabbit.


OK, name that tune!

>>> grace slick >>> jefferson airplane. ?? Go ask Alice? was that the name of the song?
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Offline Boo Radley

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Re: I feel like a superball.
« Reply #29 on: February 26, 2007, 12:46:00 pm »
Quote from: jyngfilm on February 25, 2007, 07:19:23 pm
>>> grace slick >>> jefferson airplane. ?? Go ask Alice? was that the name of the song?

The song is "White Rabbit" but those aren't its lyrics.  I memorized White Rabbit (and Somebody to Love) in junior high school.  I loved Grace Slick until she became a parody of herself but now in her 60s (70s?) she's screwed her head on pretty well. 

No one had a voice like hers. 

Boo
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String up every aristocrat!
Out with the priests and let them live on their fat!





Everything I do, say, think, excrete, secrete, exude, ooze, or write © 2007 Sweet Old Boo, Inc.
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