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Welcome to the POZ Community Forums, a round-the-clock discussion area for people with HIV/AIDS, their friends/family/caregivers, and others concerned about HIV/AIDS.  Click on the links below to browse our various forums; scroll down for a glance at the most recent posts; or join in the conversation yourself by registering on the left side of this page.

Privacy Warning:  Please realize that these forums are open to all, and are fully searchable via Google and other search engines. If you are HIV positive and disclose this in our forums, then it is almost the same thing as telling the whole world (or at least the World Wide Web). If this concerns you, then do not use a username or avatar that are self-identifying in any way. We do not allow the deletion of anything you post in these forums, so think before you post.

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Recent Posts

Pages: [1] 2 3 ... 10
Dear Jim,

3 days back I went to sex worker women, there I involved into the following activities:
1. She performed blowjob for 4minutes without condom
2. I licked her pussy for 2 minutes without condom
3. We had protected intercourse vaginal sex for almost 15-20 minutes, there is no condom break it is intact throught the course

Do I need to go for testing, I'm stressed thinking about this encounter and possibility of getting infected with HIV.

If the lady is hiv positive, then what are my chances of getting infected with this encounter. Please suggest.

I'm not able to do anything, just thinking about this and worried. Please help
I Just Tested Poz / Re: HIV Treatment / Viral Load Issues
« Last post by harleymc on Today at 12:02:16 am »
One result that went up is not a trend.
Do I Have HIV? / Re: Theoretical Risk?
« Last post by Hulkmania on Yesterday at 11:59:50 pm »
Thank you for helping me answering my questions. So regardless of blood, semen or vaginal fluids etc hitting wounds, cuts, blisters etc is not really a risk? This is what has made me avoid vaginal and anal sex. And I always been a person to use condom. So like you said just focus on always wearing condoms and focusing on the realistic proved ways hiv can be a risk ?
Off Topic Forum / Re: song of the day
« Last post by joemutt on Yesterday at 11:52:07 pm »
Left Out In The Cold, Sparks, from their 24th album
A Steady Drip, Drip, Drip.


They will be on Radio 6 tonight 6-8 PM local,
with Tom Robinson for 'Now Playing: Bring Your Own Sparks' on BBC Radio 6 Music:
Live streaming here:

Living With HIV / Re: Should you tell people you have sex with?
« Last post by fabio on Yesterday at 11:10:11 pm »
That's true,I don't want to jump into something knowing it might hurt me in the End,which is why I'll be up front and just see if it's for real or just mixed signals. Plus I don't know him for that long,but he does keep giving mixed signals.
Anyways,I'm very thankful for your advice. I am gonna just tell it up straight and whatever sticks,just like spaghetti.
Living With HIV / Re: 1985
« Last post by harleymc on Yesterday at 11:00:16 pm »
I quite enjoyed it when it was in the cinemas.  I liked the main friendship in the movie, but as a guy who was out about my sexuality since my teens and out about my HIV diagnosis, I found the scenario difficult to relate to

But a beautifully shot and directed piece.
Living With HIV / Re: Should you tell people you have sex with?
« Last post by harleymc on Yesterday at 10:54:14 pm »
The whole 'guilt' issue is about stigma.

The stigma may be amplified by legal constraints of may be internal.  But what you described is zero risk of transmission.  Whether or not there is any legal liability is another matter, we don't know where this occurred.

As for social risk your sex part we would need to be opening themself up to social judgement about having unprotected sex with a stranger.  Ironically you're probably protected from HIV stigma by sex-negative stigma.

Don't go rushing into a relationship just because someone asks you to spend the night.  We are not damaged goods who have to jump at the first sign of being treated with human dignity.

Find out if you like the guy, not just the oral sex.

Living With HIV / Re: Should you tell people you have sex with?
« Last post by Jim Allen on Yesterday at 10:27:44 pm »

Firstly you can't change what has happened just learn from the experience.

Now I am sure there are people with different experiences and thoughts than my own on this topic. Plenty of past threads to read on "disclosure" as well.

My own humble experience, I tend to disclose upfront when dating. This means it's out of the way and I don't waste my time on someone who isn't able to cope with the fact I have a manageable medical condition.  I would not want to be with someone who can't see past things like that anyway.

Nothing ventured, nothing gained, and rejection is always a risk in dating, however, for me, HIV has never been an issue, sure I've had a few polite "No thank you's" over the years but I've had more people say "no thanks" because I have kids or for other reasons.

me not telling him when we had oral and all that scares me

You mean his reaction I presume?

Well perhaps find out what his thoughts are on HIV first before telling him. I've heard other people try introducing the topic to test the waters so to speak in a stealth manner, for example, mentioning a news topic about HIV or a program on TV etc, the point is you can see how they respond and if it's really negative you can choose to just move on to the next dating opportunity.

Off Topic Forum / Re: some random stray thoughts
« Last post by Jim Allen on Yesterday at 10:00:46 pm »

You are 100% welcome to return to the forum after the time-out and I hope you do.
To be clear forum members have been expressing concern for your wellbeing over the past weeks because they care about you and, we have let a lot of things slide as it seems clear that you are in pain and in need of support so it really hurts me we have had issued you with a time-out.

Express yourself, sure, however, a bit of decorum, please!

Whatever is going on you simply can't take it out on us and we can't continue to tolerate flame-bating, posting nasty comments to piss people off and the hijacking of threads. Personally I find it cheeky that you accuse others of being judgmental.

Anyhow, if you are still looking for examples of the issues here are just a mere few examples from the plenty of very recent interactions. Read back your own comments in the threads as well.


Other peoples comments:





Do I Have HIV? / Re: Denied PEP and worried now that I may be infected.
« Last post by Jim Allen on Yesterday at 08:54:28 pm »
You're welcome.

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