POZ Community Forums
Main Forums => Living With HIV => Topic started by: zeb on April 03, 2007, 05:05:12 pm
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Just interested,
greets
Zeb
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So many of my friends, fuck buddies, and two of my former lovers had tested positive. Some had died. It was just time.
The year: 1989. The place: Denver, CO.
Even though I anticipated a positive result, my heart felt like it had dropped into my belly for a couple of days after getting the results.
I went on a *party binge* that lasted 2 years.
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Went into treatment for sexual addiction. They THOUGHT they tested for everything.... so I thought I was good to go for about 3 weeks.... then they sent me back. Next day I'm part of the cool kids club around here.
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In 1983 there was no test available, and then in 1985, there was so much doubt about the new test, I wasn't impressed with testing. As time went on, I really didn't want to know. I tested for the first time in 1994 so that I could get medical assistance. Hell, I still don't want to know, but I really knew the first time I went to the doctor and there was really little doubt in his diagnosis back in 1983.
Love,
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I got strep throat on a trip to Maine in the summer of '93, so when I got back to NYC I went to see a gay doctor that a friend (years ago) had given me his business card. He asked if wanted to be checked for HIV, and at age 28 I'd never been checked so I said yes without hesitation. To be honest I lost ZERO sleep waiting for the result as I'd gotten respiratory infections easily all of my life. Anyway, it came back positive.
I don't think what I had was seroconversion for the afore mentioned reasons, plus my cd4's were in AIDS terrirtory and it took me five years to get above 300. Best estimate was infection five years previous to that... as an estimate of course.
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Hello,
The month was July, the year 1985. My current partner and I were having problems ( A lot of this was contributable to alcohol, on my part) It was around the 4th of July, I left the house,and went to the bar. I met someone, and for the next several days, had unprotected sex. About two weeks later, maybe sooner , I noticed a discharge. Went to the public clinic and tested positive for Gonorrhea. I then proceded to get that cleared up. I went back to the individual that I had been with, He then told me, that he was indeed HIV positive. I tested positive, about two weeks after Rock Hudson's death in October of 1985, at the county health dept.
And as Paul Harvey would say, "now you know the rest of the story "
Ray
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Over the phone. I had a friend who is a doctor call and get the results for me from the lab. I wasn't surprised - he was devastated and I ended up comforting him.
I had suspected for some time but there was just too much going on in my life to deal with "knowing" so I did not get tested. I had signed up to do AIDS LifeCycle 5 in California and felt like a hypocrite riding in an AIDS fundraiser without knowing - so I got the test.
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None of the above.
I did have a bad seroconversion illness including the rash and this left me with quite bad PN for about 18 months afterwards, despite treatment for this, at no time did the medics suggest a test or give me any reason to suspect that I'd had anything more than a bad 'flu type virus' which had caused some nerve damage. I didn't know what seroconversion was at the time.
It was only about 3 years later after suffering an almost constant succession of minor ailments like sore throats, ear infections, boils, colds eye infections & etc. that I realised that there had to be some underlying cause.
Weeks of pondering always led me to the same conclusion and when I really thought about my past behaviour the result wasn't a surprise to me, lucky I tested when I did though because my results were quite bad and I started straight away on meds.
John.
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I had two bad seroconversions. The first year I had rash, fever, diahriaha, but the year before I had a heiatal hernia operation, so the hospital personal thought that my illness was related to it. I was tested for HIV but tested negative. Almost exactly a year later I had a bout with severe depression then the diahrreah started, fevers, and I retested thinking it was foolish being I was not sexually active during that year at all. I never was much of a sexual animal. Well the doctor told me to go to the hospital to take care of the symptoms, when i got there he told me I had tested positive. My primary care physician was good about it he sat down talked to me had me in the hospital where he could provide support for me and he did. He found me a great ID doctor. Was so thrilled when he agreed to take my case he ran back to my room to tell me. Found me a good social worker and a psychiatrist. They all met together to attend to my case and worked out strategies with me. I had some very good health care professionals help me. I am very grateful for that.
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I got a rash, and I was due for my 6 months hiv test, so I said to the doctor "oh while you're at it add an hiv test to the blood work". I don't know if I expected the results or not. I expected being + earlier, not that day I think.
Milker.
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In the hospital with PCP and MAC. That was about 2 years ago. Figure I converted at least 5 years before that. I did not want to know, so I never tested, stupid yes, but hind sight is 20/20. I wasNOT shocked when I was told because I knew I made bad decisions but that was part of the fun, so to speak.
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I used to get tested every six months or so.
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I voted Part of my regular check . ..... Even though I was a denialist during the 90's and during the early part of this decade, I was still getting tested for HIV. Yeah, odd. It was more like me wanting to say "See? See? Negative again!" Anyway I tested negative 3 times in the 90's and the poz result hit me in early 2000.
Prior to the poz result, I was foolish enough to think I was gonna test negative each and every time
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Allopathicholistic - cute kitty is he yours?
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oh that cat's been sort of a mini-sensation on YouTube in the past cople of months because she can tap keys on a piano. they call her the piano playing cat which is of course a stretch.
Nora is her name but she's not mine
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I was going to join the Navy to be a linguist.
Nope.
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My partner was sick for two weeks and not getting any better. We got a second opinion and he said he was probably seroconverting. I went and had a quick test done. And thats how I found out.
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None. I drove a friend of mine to a STD clinic and the nurse offered me the choice of being tested. I happily agreed believing I was going to test negative.
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It was a regular test. I had tested negative three months earlier, much to my surprise. Jimmie and I had thrown away the condoms at that time. He told me he didn't know his status because he had never been tested. As much as that man was a seriously troubled soul, I honestly believe he didn't know his status. I got tested the same week I sent him packing back to California. However, I didn't test poz until one test later ... the test was in Dec, I got the results ten years ago on Jan 29. I put off getting the results over and over because... in the the months between September and December of 1996 I was in self destruct mode. I was self medicating with sex. I stopped caring about safe sex even though I was supposedly a responsible visible member of the community. I volunteered religiously for anything I could, but at the same time I was fucking like there was no tomorrow. I ate shrooms like they grew in the backyard. (Oh wait... this was Seattle... they actually do grow in the backyard) So ... while Jimmie probably infected me.... it could have easily been one of the hundred or so men I had sex with the last few months of 1996.
I got the news January 29 1997. Patrick, the nice, caring, politically correct worried man who worked for the primary infection clinic at the University of WA handed me a card and said, "Scott, here are your test results.". I opened it. HIV+
I sat and stared. Then I started to sob. Over the years of being a volunteer at Bailey Boushay house (the local AIDS hospice) I knew what was in store. I had held the hands of the dying. I worked as a counselor for men who needed support, a friendly ear. (Shanti). I was on the other side suddenly and realized that I never really understood. Until that moment I was living in a fog.
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http://forums.poz.com/index.php?topic=7101.0
Here is my saga.
rob
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I did a HOME ACCESS anonymous test at a friends house in October. It had been 1.5 years before my previous test and I used to be a tweaker so i figured I had put myself at high risk for testing positive. I waited so long because I needed time to work at being emotionally stable enough to handle that kind of news.
So 3 days after the test I call the number, i punch in the code, and the machine said "please wait while we transfer your call" right then i knew what the lady was going to tell me because the other times i did that test the machine just came on and said "negative"...
Although I knew the odds were against me you arent ever REALLY prepared to hear that kind of news,,,,,she said "positive", I just said "ok". she says "were you expecting a positive result?" she sounded quite numb lol...
I didnt break down and cry or anything but I was in a state of shock and was driving at the time (not a good idea) so I had to pull over and regroup...
I do remember seroconverting though now that I look back...I took a test around that time but must have been in the "window period" because it came back negative