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Author Topic: I think i'm infected - Really scared  (Read 11884 times)

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Offline merci

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I think i'm infected - Really scared
« on: September 14, 2011, 08:52:36 am »
24 days ago, I had sex with a 39 years old men. he gave me oral and then we were rubing each other, My penis poked hus anus and went into her cheek buns deep but ii didnot felt any  penetration ( if it penetrated, would ii feel it?) . 2 weeks after, i had a sore throat,  Penile Thrush, fatigue, chills, night sweat and as far as i know, there was no fever unless i didn't felt it. Sometimes, my hands and feet would freeze but the temperature is hot. I also had nausea after eating. Now that i have checked all the symptoms, i'm sure i have the hiv, i got tested yesterday, but it takes a week to get the blood result. The men does not think hhe has hiv but after our encounter, he told me he had unprotected sex and some other encounters. i hvae to think that he is positive, now i think i am too. i'm really scared. i felt a little sensation in my uretha but only after we had sex, i dont feel it after urinating. Could this be a coincidenccce that i'm having all these symptoms. please help me

Offline Ann

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Re: I think i'm infected - Really scared
« Reply #1 on: September 14, 2011, 08:57:55 am »
Merci,

The rubbing you describe is known as frottage and frottage is not a risk for hiv infection.

You would have known if you actually penetrated him because an anus that is not lubed is difficult to penetrate.

Getting a blowjob is also not a risk for hiv infection.

Here's what you need to know in order to avoid hiv infection:

You need to be using condoms for anal or vaginal intercourse, every time, no exceptions until such time as you are in a securely monogamous relationship where you have both tested for ALL sexually transmitted infections together.

To agree to have unprotected intercourse is to consent to the possibility of being infected with an STI. Sex without a condom lasts only a matter of minutes, but hiv is forever.

Have a look through the condom and lube links in my signature line so you can use condoms with confidence.

ALTHOUGH YOU DO NOT NEED TO TEST OVER FROTTAGE OR GETTING BLOWN, anyone who is sexually active should be having a full sexual health care check-up, including but not limited to hiv testing, at least once a year and more often if unprotected intercourse occurs.

If you aren't already having regular, routine check-ups, now is the time to start. As long as you make sure condoms are being used for intercourse, you can fully expect your routine hiv tests to return with negative results.

Don't forget to always get checked for all the other sexually transmitted infections as well, because they are MUCH easier to transmit than hiv.

Use condoms for anal or vaginal intercourse, correctly and consistently, and you will avoid hiv infection. It really is that simple!

Ann
Condoms are a girl's best friend

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"...health will finally be seen not as a blessing to be wished for, but as a human right to be fought for." Kofi Annan

Nymphomaniac: a woman as obsessed with sex as an average man. Mignon McLaughlin

HIV is certainly character-building. It's made me see all of the shallow things we cling to, like ego and vanity. Of course, I'd rather have a few more T-cells and a little less character. Randy Shilts

Offline merci

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Re: I think i'm infected - Really scared
« Reply #2 on: September 14, 2011, 09:04:49 am »
Ann,

Thank you for the fast reply, The thing, he lubrifiated his ass and his cheek. I don't know if my mind is playing me a trick about if i penetrated him or not, but i didn't felt anything around it. I did not put alot of pressure but the tip of my penis was poking against him, i couldnot see anything because of the light and the cheeks.
I'm really scared because there are symptoms i never felt before. like the fatigue, i could not work, all i was thinking is to sleep, and for the cold sensation, i would sweat a little bit at night, and when i go to the bathroom i would freeze, sometimes i had chills, and sometimes my forehead was cold sweating.


Offline Ann

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Re: I think i'm infected - Really scared
« Reply #3 on: September 14, 2011, 09:13:00 am »
Merci,

I'm sure you would have known if you entered him.

Neither symptoms nor the lack of symptoms will ever tell you a single thing about your hiv status. ONLY testing at the appropriate time will.

When there has actually been a risk (and I do not believe you had a risk), the earliest one should test is at six weeks. The vast majority of people who have actually been infected will seroconvert by six weeks, with the average time to seroconversion being only 22 days. A six week negative - where there has actually been a risk - must be confirmed at the three month point, but is highly unlikely to change.

If your illness had anything to do with hiv, you will either test indeterminate or positive on your recent test. I am absolutely not expecting anything other than a negative result for you.

Ann



Condoms are a girl's best friend

Condom and Lube Info  

"...health will finally be seen not as a blessing to be wished for, but as a human right to be fought for." Kofi Annan

Nymphomaniac: a woman as obsessed with sex as an average man. Mignon McLaughlin

HIV is certainly character-building. It's made me see all of the shallow things we cling to, like ego and vanity. Of course, I'd rather have a few more T-cells and a little less character. Randy Shilts

Offline merci

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Re: I think i'm infected - Really scared
« Reply #4 on: September 14, 2011, 09:19:07 am »
Thank you alot Ann, i really apreciate what you are doing, this this is i had candida balatis on my penis before the encounter, does that affect anything? is it like a cut? I had a test at 22 days, let say that my illness that i had was from hiv, the test would be positive or not determined? If we all seroconversate from 2-4week, why not everyone shows a posite or negative after 1 month?

Thank you ann

Offline Andy Velez

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Re: I think i'm infected - Really scared
« Reply #5 on: September 14, 2011, 10:40:52 am »
The AVERAGE time to seroconversion iss 22 days. AVERAGE. All but the smallest number of those who are going to seroconvert will do so within 4-6 weeks after a risky incident. There are different factors which can come into play as to why one person takes longer than another to seroconvert.

In your case if you choose to get tested it is strictly for your peace of mind. I would expect you to test negative because I think your anxiety is essentially about what ifs and not a genuine risk for HIV.
Andy Velez

Offline merci

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Re: I think i'm infected - Really scared
« Reply #6 on: September 14, 2011, 12:08:47 pm »
thanks for the reply,

At first, i wasn't anxious about it, when 10 days past after the encounter, i got a sorethroat without a runny nose, and the got really fatigued for 3-4days, i got bumpy red little dots on the head on my penis and i had a white tongue, and a rash on my neck and face. Sometimes goosebumps and my hand and feet freezing.  I had nausea after eating, and that all hapenned together and left together. after all these symptoms hapenned, i started checking out for symptoms and i saw that i had all the symptoms. than i started to freak out. No one is sick around me and the temperature is pretty good here, i don't know where i could get these symptoms from.

It's really hard to deal with this and i regret everything but i can't go back. All i can think of is my penis would have entered him by mistake :S

Offline Andy Velez

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Re: I think i'm infected - Really scared
« Reply #7 on: September 14, 2011, 12:35:28 pm »
You should be discussing your symptoms with your doctor instead of self-diagnosing them as HIV.

There is no basis in HIV-science to see them as HIV-related. Those are not in anyway HIV specific symptoms.

There's really nothing more we can say to you. Get tested if you must to relieve your concern and collect the inevtiable negative result.
Andy Velez

Offline merci

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Re: I think i'm infected - Really scared
« Reply #8 on: September 18, 2011, 09:33:59 pm »
he just told me he is positive :S i'm really scared of my results, that make me think that my penis could have dipped in his anus without me feeling it, i'm so scared a this point, i read alot of people commenting on how was their seroconvertion "How was your seroconversion?" and they look a lot like mine, i know you already told me that i'm probably going to get a negative test, but i still feel like im 100% sure i got the infection, i can't stop crying at this moment. I never had chills in the past, with  a nightsweats and that fatigue was something else, im pretty sure im infected :S

Offline RapidRod

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Re: I think i'm infected - Really scared
« Reply #9 on: September 18, 2011, 10:07:36 pm »
You aren't going through seroconversion you've never had a risk. Try rereading the replies that you have been given.

Offline jkinatl2

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Re: I think i'm infected - Really scared
« Reply #10 on: September 18, 2011, 10:28:14 pm »
You do not, CAN NOT get HIV through your experience as you describe it.

"Many people, especially in the gay community, turn to oral sex as a safer alternative in the age of AIDS. And with HIV rates rising, people need to remember that oral sex is safer sex. It's a reasonable alternative."

-Kimberly Page-Shafer, PhD, MPH

Welcome Thread

Offline merci

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Re: I think i'm infected - Really scared
« Reply #11 on: September 18, 2011, 11:00:18 pm »
thanks for your replies, that make me feel more good about this situation, the thing i had a cut on my penis and when i was poking his anus with the tip of my penis, im scared that it could have entered but i did not felt it alitle bit, i hope im still negative...

Offline jkinatl2

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Re: I think i'm infected - Really scared
« Reply #12 on: September 19, 2011, 01:11:58 am »
A cut on your penis makes no difference. You simply do not get HIV through the incident as you describe it.

"Many people, especially in the gay community, turn to oral sex as a safer alternative in the age of AIDS. And with HIV rates rising, people need to remember that oral sex is safer sex. It's a reasonable alternative."

-Kimberly Page-Shafer, PhD, MPH

Welcome Thread

Offline merci

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Re: I think i'm infected - Really scared
« Reply #13 on: September 20, 2011, 11:23:43 pm »
I got my 4 week test and came back negative, are they a good a good endicator of my status, i hope you understand why i'm asking, being axious after all these symptoms ... 4 weeks blood test is a good indicator?

thank you

Offline jkinatl2

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Re: I think i'm infected - Really scared
« Reply #14 on: September 20, 2011, 11:31:58 pm »
The fact that you had NO VALID EXPOSURE makes a bit more difference.

YOu cannot get HIV from the behavior you described. It's scientifically impossible.

"Many people, especially in the gay community, turn to oral sex as a safer alternative in the age of AIDS. And with HIV rates rising, people need to remember that oral sex is safer sex. It's a reasonable alternative."

-Kimberly Page-Shafer, PhD, MPH

Welcome Thread

Offline merci

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Re: I think i'm infected - Really scared
« Reply #15 on: September 20, 2011, 11:40:54 pm »
Hey I'm scared that is ha dipped in the anus,  this is why I'm freaking out I could not see where the head of my penis was going and it was poking the anus so I don't know if it dipped , this is why I want to know. If 4 week tes is a good indicator? Symptoms was something I never had before...

Offline jkinatl2

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Re: I think i'm infected - Really scared
« Reply #16 on: September 20, 2011, 11:57:47 pm »
Symptoms have absolutely nothing to do with HIV diagnosis. While it is theoretically possible to become infected though pre-ejaculatory fluid dipped into YOUR anus (yet still not very likely) your incident was not something a competent HIV counselor or physician would ever consider advising testing over.

If you insist on testing, then wait two more weeks and to it again. All but very few seroconvert within six weeks of exposure. A test three months after exposure is considered definitive.

But you are more likely to test positive for pregnancy than HIV after the incident as you described it.

"Many people, especially in the gay community, turn to oral sex as a safer alternative in the age of AIDS. And with HIV rates rising, people need to remember that oral sex is safer sex. It's a reasonable alternative."

-Kimberly Page-Shafer, PhD, MPH

Welcome Thread

Offline Andy Velez

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Re: I think i'm infected - Really scared
« Reply #17 on: September 21, 2011, 08:38:54 am »
You have a little more time to wait to do a 6 weeks test. You need to make a real effort to focus on other things in your life during the waiting time. And don't bother saying you're too worried to do that because I can tell you that response is not going to fly here. Just do it.

The average time to seroconversion is 22 days. Given all that you have reported of the incident and your recent negative, I am expecting you to continue to test negative.

There's really nothing more for us to say about this. You just have to wait to test. Now, get on with other things in your day today.
Andy Velez

Offline merci

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Re: I think i'm infected - Really scared
« Reply #18 on: September 27, 2011, 10:07:23 pm »
I have had a blood test at 36 days after my encounter that came back negatif, i know you told me i have had no risk, but just to ease my mind alittle bit, at 36 day test after this exposure and having all these symtoms, can i be reassured?

Thank you alot

Offline merci

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Re: I think i'm infected - Really scared
« Reply #19 on: September 27, 2011, 10:33:30 pm »
i have had a lot of stress lately that made me sick, that it could have weakened my immune sytteme that the elisa test could have not find antibody for hiv yet? is this possible?

Thank you

Offline Ann

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Re: I think i'm infected - Really scared
« Reply #20 on: September 28, 2011, 05:19:27 am »
Merci,

While stress might make you feel ill, it will not affect your immune system to the point of not producing antibodies.

You have not had a risk for hiv infection, so your negative result is no surprise.

Ann
Condoms are a girl's best friend

Condom and Lube Info  

"...health will finally be seen not as a blessing to be wished for, but as a human right to be fought for." Kofi Annan

Nymphomaniac: a woman as obsessed with sex as an average man. Mignon McLaughlin

HIV is certainly character-building. It's made me see all of the shallow things we cling to, like ego and vanity. Of course, I'd rather have a few more T-cells and a little less character. Randy Shilts

Offline merci

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Re: I think i'm infected - Really scared
« Reply #21 on: September 30, 2011, 07:38:18 pm »
just want to know, i was reading about giving advice to test at 6 week, is is almost conclusive and unlikely to change?  i got a bacteria from that intercourse that made me sick shiver and all the other symptoms (UTI), this is why i got the tingly/burning sensation after sex, i tested at 40 days, is it accurate, and can i acquire uti without penetration?

Thank you

Offline jkinatl2

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Re: I think i'm infected - Really scared
« Reply #22 on: September 30, 2011, 07:41:24 pm »
You do not get HIV from the incident as you describe it.

And yes, other STDs are easy to get. In addition, one does not have to get a UTI through sexual activity. Something as simple as getting soapy water into the urethra in a shower can facilitate irritation and a UTI.

Your concerns regarding HIV do not have a basis in science.

"Many people, especially in the gay community, turn to oral sex as a safer alternative in the age of AIDS. And with HIV rates rising, people need to remember that oral sex is safer sex. It's a reasonable alternative."

-Kimberly Page-Shafer, PhD, MPH

Welcome Thread

Offline merci

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Re: I think i'm infected - Really scared
« Reply #23 on: September 30, 2011, 07:59:50 pm »
Thanks for everything, this forum is perfect, i got tested for std and all came back negative. Probably the contact with the outside of anus and the uretha and lube must have gave me UTI, after a 40 day test, i can feel confident i didnot catch it, even if i had no risk, when i was in that situation i was thinking about the worst.
The 40 day test should be the last test?

Offline RapidRod

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Re: I think i'm infected - Really scared
« Reply #24 on: September 30, 2011, 08:21:00 pm »
As you were told and haven't listened, you never had an exposure and didn't need testing.

Offline merci

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Re: I think i'm infected - Really scared
« Reply #25 on: September 30, 2011, 08:25:51 pm »
Great Chief, thanks for everything :)

Offline jkinatl2

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Re: I think i'm infected - Really scared
« Reply #26 on: September 30, 2011, 08:49:55 pm »
Is this thing even on?
"Many people, especially in the gay community, turn to oral sex as a safer alternative in the age of AIDS. And with HIV rates rising, people need to remember that oral sex is safer sex. It's a reasonable alternative."

-Kimberly Page-Shafer, PhD, MPH

Welcome Thread

 


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