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Main Forums => In Memoriam => Topic started by: tednlou2 on November 07, 2014, 12:09:08 am

Title: Loss Of A Friend
Post by: tednlou2 on November 07, 2014, 12:09:08 am
My brother use to work at a bar in Atlanta.  One of his friends and fellow bartenders just passed away.  My brother has taken it very hard, since they were much closer.  I would see him, when I visited my brother.  And, I stayed in contact through FB.  So, he and I weren't like best friends or anything, but still friends.

He had HIV for a long time.  He was 42 and I think infected when he was around 18.  He developed lung cancer.  He also developed brain cancer, which they don't think was connected.  He had a great prognosis.  Both were caught very early.  They removed the tumors from both the lung and the brain.  The cancers hadn't spread.  The docs said he would survive.  He was posting things on FB the night before he died.  It is so odd.  From what my brother was able to gather, the docs believe his immune system wasn't strong enough-- saying if he had a fully functioning immune system, he would have likely not had this complication and death.  I am not sure if some massive infection happened or what. 

He was a smoker and a pot smoker.  He may have likely developed both cancers, even if not poz.  Who knows.  And, who knows what is sprayed on the pot plants---another reason to legalize and regulate, but I digress.  Very sad.  I didn't even know he was poz, until recently.  I am not including his name, because of google.  He left Atlanta for Ft. Lauderdale, where he was a bartender there. 
Title: Re: Loss Of A Friend
Post by: absopozilutely on November 07, 2014, 10:49:28 am
RIP to your friend I'm sorry for your loss. The only thing I didn't understand is the "fully functioning immune system" was he not on HAART?
Title: Re: Loss Of A Friend
Post by: zach on November 07, 2014, 12:28:36 pm
sorry for yalls loss ted... '14 has been a heavy year for me as well, i've lost many friends. that pain is one of the cruelest of life's trials

help keep your brother strong

how are you with this? i'm assuming your brother knows your status, is he fearful for your health? are you? keep taking care of yourself man
Title: Re: Loss Of A Friend
Post by: tednlou2 on November 09, 2014, 01:02:51 am
RIP to your friend I'm sorry for your loss. The only thing I didn't understand is the "fully functioning immune system" was he not on HAART?

I asked my brother about this.  He said he was on meds.  I asked whether he had a lot of resistance and was on salvage therapy.  My brother didn't know.  I use to go visit a lot, when my brother lived there and I was younger.  My brother would host Thanksgiving dinner, and my parents, partner, and I would go down there.  He was always there.  He was such a great guy. 

Zach, my brother does know about me.  However, it is never discussed.  This was the first time in a very long time, that we even discussed HIV.  Perhaps this awful thing will open a door to more discussion.