My memory is that of an old man

[barbch2]

I find myself almost every night jumping out of bed wondering if I have taken my Atripla. There was even one night that I actually called my doctor in the middle of the night freaking out because I could not remember. There are also times I get really confused while I am at work, I will be in the middle of something and completely forget where I am, but it will come back to me after a few seconds. Its really scary. I wonder to myself, "is it the medication, or is this HIV killing me and my brain?" Its actually really depressing because I used to be a very sharp person, and you could not get anything past me and I would never forget anything, and now I have real problems even remembering what I did the previous day.

[leatherman]

still in your first year of dealing with your diagnosis, it's quite possible depression is a factor in your forgetfulness. never underestimate the power of depression

of course, because it's all new too, you could just be putting more emphasis on this issue than really necessary. Nearly everyone has little lapses of forgetfulness. What you may have always been experiencing is just freaking you out now that you're noticing it and assigning it as an HIV-related issue. Forgetfulness happens to people who are neg too. LOL oh, and although I don't know your age, never forget there could be a aging issue going on. LOL

if you find yourself "forgetting" doses too often or just too concerned about forgetting, don't just sit around worring about it - take action and ease your concerns. a pill container (marked with the days) could give you the confidence you need. I use a 7-day 4-time-a-day (morning, lunch, dinner, evening) container to store nearly a whole month's worth of pills.

as the years go by, you'll find that list-making (and/or keeping journals) really helps on remembering what you did, what you need to do, and staying sharp. heck why do you think all those people use daily planners and palm pilots to remember what's going on in their lives? LOL it's a hectic world out there and just being a "sharp person" doesn't always keep things together when life gets ultra-hectic. So take some positive steps to help yourself remember and I'm sure you'll find you might not have as big a problem as you think it is.

[wolfter]

I experience similar issues.  I freaked me out at first but have learned to quassi laugh about it.  I refer to it as brain fade.  I didn't experience it for the first 15 years of being poz so I'm just marking it up to getting older.  You might actually learn to laugh about it after time.  Nothing like going to the store for something specific and spending all your money just to realize you didn't even purchase what you went for. 

As Leatherman said, depression can take an exterme toll. 

[newby05]

Been there. After 2 years of taking Atripla at night, I suddenly would wonder if I took the evening dose or not. I decided to change it to the morning and what a great decision that was. It has become a part of my morning routine, and I now can have happy hour at night without the sickness and yukky feeling of taking Atripla after a few drinks.

[aztecan]

A lot of things can contribute to this.

It could be stress, especially since it is the first year after diagnosis.

It could be the HIV itself, depending on how long you have had the virus lurking before diagnosis.

It could be the Sustiva portion of the Atripla. It has been known to cause CNS side effects.

I would talk to my doctor about this so at least he/she is aware of it.

I also would do something to exercise that brain of yours. Do cross word puzzles, sudoku, etc., to keep your mind active and focused.

I find it helps me, although I am an "old man" by comparison. 

HUGS,

Mark

[Dale Parker]

I was diagnosed about 20 months ago and had the same problem my first year after diagnosis. There were times when I would forget to turn the stove off, forget my phone number, plus a ton of other things.  Once a bunch of us went camping for a week and for the life of me I couldn't remember the name of the town we were in two days after I got back home.  It was really driving me nuts and scared the crap out of me. At one point I was getting so paranoid about forgetting things that the paranoia was the cause of my forgetfulness.
      I spoke to my doctor and you can get a memory loss if you have been positive for a long time (which they figure I was). It turned out most of my memory loss was just brain overload. My memory has come back as as most of the problems were due to the stress of being diagnosed, having to move and a few other things that were going on  in my life.
   After a while I was having problems remembering if I had taken my pills or not. I have a fairly good routine for both my morning and evening pills. Sometimes an hour or so after I had taken my pills I wasn't sure if the memory of taking them was from just having taken them or from some other time before.  I bought a pill box that goes for a week with separate compartments for AM and PM. Now if I think that I have forgotten them I just check my box and have the peace of mind of knowing that I have taken them.

[tednlou2]

I notice that I forget things more now, mix up words in speech and text.  I, too, have wondered what's up.  Maybe it is a combination of all the things others mentioned.  Maybe we're just noticing things about our health and body more now living with HIV.  Just yesterday, I had a few times where I scrambled words around when speaking.  One of the things I said was, "We need to get the dinner for cheese." 

I've noticed when typing I'll spell "here" for "hear", "there" for "their", etc.  I've noticed neg folks do all these things, too.  So, maybe I'm just paying more attention to it.  Right now, I think it is probably due to being tired or having anxiety.  It does seem to happen more when I'm having anxiety and thinking about being poz.  So, I think maybe it is about being distracted.  If it is happening all the time, then you, or any of us, should talk to our docs about it. 

[BT65]

When I'm experiencing stress, I can't even remember phone numbers.  Not so much when I'm relaxed.  I don't have a very good short-term memory.  I can't remember everything I just learned in the last semester of school; a lot of it, but not all of it.  And we've only been out of school for a few weeks.  I really don't know how much has to do with HIV, how much has to do with age, and how much has to do with me doing damage to the brain with all the past drug addiction, and some medical maladies that have happened.  I'm not going to fret about it, though, until I show some serious signs, like forgetting where I live, friends etc. 

[mecch]

if you find yourself "forgetting" doses too often or just too concerned about forgetting, don't just sit around worring about it - take action and ease your concerns.

yes, for the haart, and for all the little tasks of work and life. its a pain, but part of the healing process finally.

[bear60]

Darn, I forgot to take my morning meds.  But thanks to reading this post, I remembered that I had forgotten.

[Granny60]

 hubby had the same problem for the first 2 years.  seems like when his CD4  gets over 250  he gets better, when it drops,  it gets worse.   when it was a little over 100 he would get lost in the same little  town  he has lived for 50 years, take his meds twice, or forget them all together.  It does seem to get better as CD4 rises. He has the same issues as tednlou2 and parker  when CD4 drops, but that is better when it goes up also. He is no-longer allowed to fill his pill boxes, but can go to town on his own right now. seems like  the longer you or on meds, the better it gets, but the longer you were infected or the lower your CD4 originally was , the longer it takes to improve.  He is just over 200 right now, but he is in better shape now  than in the past so the declines are as much as they used to be so being on the meds for several years have to be making a difference.

[Jeff G]

I'm a neat freak around my house and always know where everything is even if I put it away years ago . I have noticed in the last year I am having trouble finding things that I know are there somewhere . I have to check my pill organizer to make sure I took my meds some days also .

The scariest thing was when I injected a double dose of insulin last month , I was lucky to have a friend over at the time .   

[red_Dragon888]

I hate to add another pill to your mix but i take Nuvigil as a fatigue fighter and I found that my mind is sharper than before.  If your meds are to blame, maybe you should try different meds.

[red_Dragon888]

sleep apnea maybe another cause.

[WillyWump]

Where I is? Who is I?

[BJS2011]

I find myself almost every night jumping out of bed wondering if I have taken my Atripla. There was even one night that I actually called my doctor in the middle of the night freaking out because I could not remember. There are also times I get really confused while I am at work, I will be in the middle of something and completely forget where I am, but it will come back to me after a few seconds. Its really scary. I wonder to myself, "is it the medication, or is this HIV killing me and my brain?" Its actually really depressing because I used to be a very sharp person, and you could not get anything past me and I would never forget anything, and now I have real problems even remembering what I did the previous day.

I am the same way. I have no memory at all. It worries me that I can't remember yesterday. People think I am exaggerating but I am not.

[sharkdiver]

I am the same way. I have no memory at all. It worries me that I can't remember yesterday. People think I am exaggerating but I am not.

just a friendly suggestion, if you look at the date of the last poster you will see how old this thread is.

[BJS2011]

I find myself almost every night jumping out of bed wondering if I have taken my Atripla. There was even one night that I actually called my doctor in the middle of the night freaking out because I could not remember. There are also times I get really confused while I am at work, I will be in the middle of something and completely forget where I am, but it will come back to me after a few seconds. Its really scary. I wonder to myself, "is it the medication, or is this HIV killing me and my brain?" Its actually really depressing because I used to be a very sharp person, and you could not get anything past me and I would never forget anything, and now I have real problems even remembering what I did the previous day.

I can relatye with you. I have NO memory at al. I remember long term but I have NO short term memory. I can't remember anything from yesterday. It is scary and I really don't know what has caused this. Going to ask my doctor.

[Matt39]

You've replied to the exact same post (that is over 6 months old) twice in the space of about two weeks (with a gentle reminder by someone in between) so you might want to get your eyes tested at the same time while you're at it. You may not remember replying the first time but you sure can see it, if you look.

[wolfter]

You've replied to the exact same post (that is over 6 months old) twice in the space of about two weeks (with a gentle reminder by someone in between) so you might want to get your eyes tested at the same time while you're at it. You may not remember replying the first time but you sure can see it, if you look.

Perhaps he doesn't remember doing so?

[Matt39]

Perhaps he doesn't remember doing so?

'Eyes' 'Read' 'See'