HIV - guy dating a HIV + guy

[CaringguyinNJ]

Hello all:

I never thought I would have been presented with this situation, however I did and I want to deal with it in the best way that I can.  I recently met a guy who I am totally into.  About a week after we met, he told me he was HIV+.  I was completely supportive, listened to him, held his hand and told him I didnt feel any different about him.  I told him that I want to see him, see where it goes and so on, however to bear with me with my questions and any apprehensions at first.

By doing random searches on the internet, it seems difficult to get a consistent answer regarding this situation.  I did some searches on here (which seems to be an awesome site - just joined today) and found a couple of answers.  I figured it would be best for me to ask my questions and see if I can get some responses.

Protected anal sex is always a must for me - always has, always will - regardless of someones status, so that isn't a concern.

 My concern is open mouth kissing, deep kissing, french kissing - not just on the lips, but open mouth where your tongue is involved.  Am I putting myself at risk in doing this?

Second is oral sex.  If I am giving and the guy has excessive precum while I am giving, again am I at risk? 

Lastly is rimming.  If he is rimming me, can I be at any risk?

I'd like to close this in saying he has been more than supportive to me in answering my concerns, but suggested I ask someone that has much more experience in this.  He wants to make sure I am comfortable with everything.

I hope I am posting this in the right topic, but figured this was the right one as I am not concerned if I had any risky behavior, but more so that I really like this guy and plan to see where this potential may go.  I am not going into this closed minded and want to be educated as possible.  I just want to know what I really need to be careful about so I can put my mind at ease.

I thank everyone in advance!

[md]

Unprotected anal sex is always a must for me - always has, always will - regardless of someones status, so that isn't a concern.

OK - I am going to assume that is a typo and you really intended to say "Protected anal sex is always a must for me" since otherwise your other questions are pretty much irrelevant.

My concern is open mouth kissing, deep kissing, french kissing - not just on the lips, but open mouth where your tongue is involved.  Am I putting myself at risk in doing this?

Absolutely no risk whatsoever.

Second is oral sex.  If I am giving and the guy has excessive precum while I am giving, again am I at risk? 

While  there is a theoretical risk here, that is all that it is - theoretical - just like there is a theoretical risk that the next time you step out of your front door you could be killed by a meteorite - in practice it isn't going to happen.

Lastly is rimming.  If he is rimming me, can I be at any risk?

Absolutely no risk to you - some risk to him of parasites and Hepatitis A - just like everybody else.

You would probably find it helpful to review the Lesson on HIV transmission on this site

[CaringguyinNJ]

md - thank you very much for your reply.  And thank you for pointing out my typo .

I appreciate you taking the time to reply to my post as this is something that is very important to me.

[megasept]

md - thank you very much for your reply.  And thank you for pointing out my typo .

I appreciate you taking the time to reply to my post as this is something that is very important to me.

By asking your straightforward questions about sexual activities/risks, you have asked questions that any sexually active gay male needs answered. The helpful advice you were given is direct and correct. Everyone benefits from this kind of post and response.

Happy Holidaaazze  -megasept