Arizona transmission charges

[tpatzol]

I need some help. I've heard some conflicting info on this topic.  Is it possible to get HIV from a positive male from giving a blow job? The blow job consists of swallowing sperm as well. 

I have read a few stories that think they got it from a blow job before.

So I need honest opinions here.

My fwb recently got infected. I've been with him for 7 years I need to determine of what I wanna do.

Yes I've given him a few blow jobs sense he was infected.

I need to add in their he isn't taking any medications for his HIV at all. Does this make a difference

[tpatzol]

I know someone that spread HIV to 2 people in Arizona.

I've looked up arizona laws & if I'm correct their isn't any.

For non disclosure in Arizona is a mistermeanor 2.

Also if he gets jail or prison time for this do they give u your hiv
Medications in jail or prison?

I hope I posted this in the right spot

[Expat1]

No criminal statutes explicitly addressing HIV exposure.
There are no criminal statutes criminalizing HIV transmission or exposure in Arizona. However, in some
states, people living with HIV (PLHIV) have been prosecuted for HIV exposure under general criminal
laws, such as reckless endangerment and aggravated assault. At the time of publication, the authors
are not aware of any prosecution under general criminal laws on the basis of HIV status in Arizona.
https://www.hivlawandpolicy.org/sites/default/files/Arizona%20-%20Excerpt%20from%20CHLP%27s%20Sourcebook%20on%20HIV%20Criminalization%20in%20the%20U.S..pdf

[leatherman]

I know someone that spread HIV to 2 people in Arizona.

can i ask how you know this? Does the person living with HIV have an undetectable viral load? If so, then they did not transmit/spread HIV. Have these 2 people had unprotected sex with anyone else? Then they could have been exposed to HIV through someone else by not protecting themselves. Were these 2 people ever tested prior to their possible exposure through this person? If not, they could have been infected some time ago

[Jim Allen]

I merged your last 2 posts, gives it some context. 

Now were not going to discuss your largely non-existent risks in this thread or ongoing drama.  I say that to be absolutely clear from the start. I have in the past already had to trash some of your posts and I am tired of it, let that be clear.

As this is "Someone I care about" section and its about your friend? Lets keep the focus on that. My two cents on that topic and Ill be frank is your friend needs a friend, someone to talk to, support them and to help them start treatment.

What you need to understand is that the choices of HIV prevention method may be different per person such as Condoms, PrEP, TaSP or a combination and some people choose none at all. The latter being a daft choice but its one some people do make.

That is their choice, and whatever someones chooses its none of your business. If they agreed with your friend or with other people to have unprotected intercourse it is accepting the greater possibility of being infected with a sexually transmitted infection and the risk of acquiring HIV.  You don't know for a fact what conversation they had beforehand or for a fact what acts they engaged in or how they did it.

So to be frank I don't think its any of your business what other people do in the bedroom and your friend does not need you calling the law on him, with your interfering accusations that's not helping.  You don't know for a fact who transmitted what to who or when and what conversations they had.

What your friend needs is a hug and someone to tell him if he needs help that they are here for him.

Jim

[tpatzol]

Actually it's my bf that has HIV.  He hid it from me for over 15 years.

He's been trying to have sex with me for the past 15 bit I refused thank God. 

Your telling me I shouldn't report him for trying to sleep with me?  While he hid it from me? I didn't want to get into specifics at the time. 

I threatened to call the cops on him for it trying to have sex  he's been begging me for the past 5 to 15 years & he tried to hurt me.

My bf was sleeping with the same guy I was sleeping with & I had no idea they were sleeping together that guy got HIV & I got blamed for it. My own bf blamed me for having HIV.  I didn't have it.

I send them to my Dr to check to make sure they have the same type of HIV he gave them. I'm so angry at my bf I could of caught it to. I think that's wrong for my bf to hide from me for 15 years. My bf blood work is where my Dr is at. 

What do u advise me to do as I'm not supposed to call the cops.  He intentionally gave it to them. Yes I know they chose not to use a condom.

I've been on this board for a very long time.  I understand the condom usage. Trust me I do. But with my bf hiding it from me for 15 years plus I have a big problem with that. I just found out a month ago. 

I'm pretty sure he's gave it to others to. I can't post no where else so I gotta post here. Sorry.

I'm not even sure how I'm supposed to feel at the moment. If he would of been honest with me he had it I would not of cared. 

I'm HIV friendly. I really am it's just he wasn't honest with me. I caught him with a guy back in MN over 15 years ago be told me he got it from him.  He admits this after the fact.

Currently I am sleeping with some one that's HIV positive but he was honest with me that he had it. .  I think he caught it from my partner as well.  I had no idea these 2 were sleeping together either. I later found that out as well. 

I will keep u guys updated of what happens if he goes to jail or not.

Was he on meds at the time that he infected them that  I don't know. I just found out a month ago he had it but now admitted where he got it.

Please do not ban me. I'm just being honest.  As u see I'm not against HIV as I'm sleeping with someone that is but when someone isn't honest about it I have a issue exspectially when they try to physically hurt u. He's lucky I didn't call the cops on him for trying to harm me. 

[Jim Allen]

He's been trying to have sex with me for the past 15 bit I refused thank God. 

Why?

Its not who you do it with its how you do it. Condoms, PrEP, TaSP

Your telling me I shouldn't report him for trying to sleep with me?  While he hid it from me? I didn't want to get into specifics at the time. 

I try to sleep with people all the time. I however would not disclose unless it was finally on the table. Offering to have sex with someone is not a crime.

I've been on this board for a very long time.  I understand the condom usage. Trust me I do. But with my bf hiding it from me for 15 years plus I have a big problem with that. I just found out a month ago. 

Why? His HIV status is none of your business, you have not been sleeping with him so what's the issue? What possible reason would you have for needing to know?

I'm not even sure how I'm supposed to feel at the moment. If he would of been honest with me he had it I would not of cared. 

I'm HIV friendly. I really am it's just he wasn't honest with me. I caught him with a guy back in MN over 15 years ago be told me he got it from him.  He admits this after the fact.

I just don't get it. He has HIV its a medical issue and his business, you have no need or rights to know as a friend. How are you HIV friendly ?   

My bf was sleeping with the same guy I was sleeping with & I had no idea they were sleeping together that guy got HIV & I got blamed for it. My own bf blamed me for having HIV.  I didn't have it.

I send them to my Dr to check to make sure they have the same type of HIV he gave them. I'm so angry at my bf I could of caught it to. I think that's wrong for my bf to hide from me for 15 years. My bf blood work is where my Dr is at.   

I call bullshit, this makes no sense.

You found out a month ago 3 people you know have HIV so you sent two of them to the same doctor one of them uses? and they confirmed the same type of HIV, firstly same type is common there are only 2 main types of HIV so that means nothing, its not proof of anything and your doctor would not disclose even that.

Your doctor certainly would not run your 2 other friends HIV stains and do a phylogenetic analysis against someone else under their care, in this case the 3rd friend, and than match up the stains. Neither would they disclose the information directly to you or your 2 other friends even if this level of investigatory analysis had been done. Not if they want to keep practising medicine and avoid possible jail time & financial claims themselves.

Your friends have HIV. I have friends with HIV, they did not get it from me and yeah I disclosed before having sex with them not that it matters. 

The issue here is you are angry, angry about nothing and you have some issues that your friend did not tell you his status when there was no need for you to know and so nothing to be angry about. 

What do u advise me to do as I'm not supposed to call the cops.  He intentionally gave it to them. Yes I know they chose not to use a condom.

So far its drama based on nothing, so do nothing. Stick to your own business and move on with your life.

Your friends are sexual active and acquired HIV, big shock I don't think so.
The source is not known, you might think its know, but what you think is not a fact.

If your friends who acquired HIV feel the need to report their concerns,  it would be up to them not you. They know what was told to them and who they have been sleeping with, you don't know these things for a fact.

Jim

[tpatzol]

Here's the problem I've been with my bf for 22 years. I was sleeping with him that's what your not understanding. I started at 17 and quit at 23. I caught him sleeping with someone else. That's y I stopped sleeping with him. Of course I'm angry at him for not being honest. If I would of kept sleeping with him I would of caught it.

Yes his drs records are at the same drs office as mine. Then if the Dr don't get the records the courts will.

I understand your concerns as well.

[Jim Allen]

Here's the problem I've been with my bf for 22 years. I was sleeping with him that's what your not understanding. I started at 17 and quit at 23. I caught him sleeping with someone else. That's y I stopped sleeping with him.

Its not a problem. There is actually no issue, you said yourself you have not been sleeping with him and so he does not need to disclose his private medical issues to you.

He acquired HIV 15 years ago, has not had sex with you since so its simply none of your business. 

See below:

Actually it's my bf that has HIV.  He hid it from me for over 15 years. He's been trying to have sex with me for the past 15 bit I refused thank God. 

I caught him with a guy back in MN over 15 years ago be told me he got it from him.  He admits this after the fact.

Yes his drs records are at the same drs office as mine. Then if the Dr don't get the records the courts will.

Medical records maybe, but that is a far cry from performing phylogenetic analysis and investigation of the 2 friends strains vs a 3rd person (3rd friend). They could compare your primary or local doctors notes all day long it would not hold this information.  Also even if they had that information going back to your earlier claims  they simply don't they would not disclose the details of the source information to you or your friends.

My advice is move on with your life.

[CaveyUK]

Agree with Jim on all this.

It's hard to follow, but I think you are saying that you don't have HIV, despite having both a partner and fuckbuddy who are positive.  You are mad at your boyfriend, who you don't sleep with, at not telling you he contracted HIV 15 years ago and you are assuming that your fuckbuddy contracted HIV from having sex with your boyfriend at some point in the past, so you want to nail your bf legally for either 1. spreading the virus to your fuckbuddy and/or 2. Trying to have sex with you over the last 15 years.

If thats all correct, my points would be :

1. It's not illegal to want to have sex with someone, especially when that person is in a relationship.

2. You are making an assumption your bf spread the virus to your other friend, which really is none of your business, even if true.

3. As this whole thing stretches back 15+ years, I doubt any offence would be within the statue of limitations for Arizona anyway (which I think is 7yrs), so it's unlikely there would be any prosecution.

4. Why the hell is your bf still with you if you don't have a sexual relationship? Even more so that he clearly wants it and you are seemingly getting sex elsewhere?

5. As you are not monogamous and are still seeing two men, ensure you use a condom for sex with either of them.

6. If you are not interested in sex with your bf, then break off the relationship for both of your sakes. Certainly do not try to get him arrested to achieve the same thing, which probably wouldn't work anyway.

7. If you want to do a really good and positive thing, encourage both your bf and your bit on the side to ensure they take their medication religiously, and educate them about things like TasP and the current good outlook for people who are adherent to meds.

[mecch]

tpatzol - maybe you should consider removing your self from a relationship where there is no sex, and dishonesty on top of that.   

It's a bit hard to follow your story.

Why not make sure you don't have HIV, and move on. Go out and find a bf where you BOTH want to have sex with each other, and where you feel there is trust. 

I once dated a guy for a few years in the 80s who lied to me about being HIV+.  I asked him many times. He knew. He lied.  But we followed safe sex.  I didn't get HIV until 15 years after that.  But anyway, I broke up that relation because of the lying.  About 10 years ago, we met a few times and he apologised from the bottom of his heart and I forgave him so eventually these things can work out. I mean we are just casual friends now, but at least that bad love and sex experience between us is done and dusted.