Scared

[TheSpaniard]

Hello all. I am a newbie here but I am here because I am extremely worried about HIV. But first, I want to say to all that I share your feelings, whether you are HIV positive or worried about not knowing. My thoughts and feelings are with you all.
My situation is like this. I had unprotected oral with an escort 5 days ago followed by protected vaginal sex. To be honest, I felt like crap morally immediately after since I am a married man and I love my wife who has been away for quite some time studying abroad. I just cannot believe I did it and I am my worst enemy right now.
Well, at night after meeting the escort I noticed a small, painless dark patch of skin in the foreskin of my penis. I felt a bit sore and so I freaked out. I went to the clinic in the morning and the doctor said it was just a bruise but I got tested anyway. I know the results will not show anything from my recent encounter but it is worth knowing of any previous condition. Since the following morning I have been feeling a bit or a sore throat, I had diarrhoea until yesterday and I feel kind of tired. Last night I woke up at 4am drenched in sweat. I am scared to my toes of this being early symptoms of HIV. I can think of other reasons for my symptoms such as eating red Korean ginseng on the same night as my encounter which apparently has diarrhoea as a side effect. I cycled that morning about 50miles and since then I have felt a bit tired. My throat? Maybe normal. Night sweat? Anxiety perhaps. I don't know but this is all I can think about. This is all that is in my mind. I cant help it. I am anxious, I cant think, sleep, eat or work. I am just making me feel worse myself by overthinking and reading lots of pages about HIV and tests, STDs, etc. The truth is that I am very scared. If I happen to be HIV positive I do not know how I will tell my wife. She doesn't deserve it. I do and I know I will come to terms with it but she doesn't deserve this to happen. I can only pray and wait until next week and get the RNA test. I am here not sure if asking for help or just wanted to get this off my chest. My wife is in France and I live in UK, no family or anyone to talk to. I am scared. The anxiety is killing me. Having these symptoms in the first 5 days after the encounter is not helping. I am scared.
Thank you for reading this. My thoughts are with you all. You are not alone. God bless you.

[Jeff G]

You are going to be perfectly fine , you did not have a risk for HIV .

Cunnilingus and getting a blow job is not a risk for HIV and the vaginal sex you had was protected ... this means you were not at risk for HIV .

ALTHOUGH YOU DO NOT NEED HIV TESTING AT THIS TIME for this incident , anyone who is sexually active should be having a full sexual health care check-up, including but not limited to hiv testing, at least once a year and more often if unprotected intercourse occurs.

If you aren't already having regular, routine check-ups, now is the time to start. As long as you make sure condoms are being used for intercourse, you can fully expect your routine hiv tests to return with negative results.

Don't forget to always get checked for all the other sexually transmitted infections as well, because they are MUCH easier to transmit than hiv. Some of the other STIs can be present with no obvious symptoms, so the only way to know for sure is to test.

Use condoms for anal or vaginal intercourse, correctly and consistently, and you will avoid hiv infection. It really is that simple!