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Author Topic: acrophobia  (Read 7937 times)

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Offline poz1970

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acrophobia
« on: January 21, 2008, 10:52:55 pm »
Howdy,

I always thought I was just a hermit, but my shrink has told me that I've got acrophobia, in the last six months, I think I've left the house a total of 4 times by myself, all other times, only leaving the house with the other half.. and at least one of those (last saturday ended up in a semi-bad panic attack) -- went to the other halfs house, the other side of town on a train, for a small family reunion, meeting his brother and nephews (first time he's seen the nephews).. caught the last train home, and it was 10 minutes late (on a saturday night, and FULL of drunk loud louts (at least one of them was hunky as all hell though :-)) so I missed my connecting train in the city, and had to beg for a cabcharge from the transit authority..

I got myself an MP3 player, to help alleviate the panic (close my eyes, and listen to relaxation music), but this time, it didn't seem to help... I was sitting there sweating like a roast pig, and jumpy as all fuck :-((

It seems to have got worse since I came off of the zoloft about a month ago, and I'm hesitant to try the replacement antidepressant, as I've been told it'll 'fuck me up' (mirtazapine, 30mg)

Anyone else had dealings with acrophobia? how have you handled it? I've tried my local positive living centre (thats the only resource as a poz guy I have), and they've basically said all they can do is send me out a bus ticket, which isn't going to help  in the slightest :-((

regards
J
"The Bible contains 6 admonishments to homosexuals and 362 admonishments to  heterosexuals. That doesn`t mean that God doesn`t love heterosexuals. It`s just that they need more supervision." -- Lynn Lavne

Offline Matty the Damned

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Re: acrophobia
« Reply #1 on: January 21, 2008, 11:39:44 pm »
Did your shrink say "acrophobia" or "agoraphobia" babe?

MtD

Offline red_Dragon888

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Re: acrophobia
« Reply #2 on: January 22, 2008, 12:15:53 am »
I use to be afraid of dragoflies but once I found  a dead dragonfly and tempted faith and got close enough to touch.  The I realized that my fear was self-inflicted and not  real.  I am not sure but maybe you are carrying, like myself, a childhood fear.  It's just in your head and it is not real.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?feature=player_embedded&v=I3ba3lnFHik

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Offline leatherman

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Re: acrophobia
« Reply #3 on: January 22, 2008, 12:57:24 am »
It's just in your head and it is not real.

it could depend on how few tcells you have though.  ;D

after having been hospitalized with pneumonia twice and having tcells below 200, I spent nearly four years as a hermit, recouperating and hiding from the germs - leaving the house only twice a month for a visit to the doc and the grocery store. It took alot of support and encouragement from my friends to finally get me back out in the world. I still get a chill and slight panic every time someone sneezes or coughs in the same aisle as me of the grocery store.

But it's been 10 yrs since the last pneumonia and I haven't had another OI or even a cold (though occasionally I have had a "mystery fever"), so I'm finally feeling a little more confident that some snotty nosed kid isn't going to be the death of me, even with my weakened immune system.  ;)

best wishes to you poz1970 working through this problem!

leatherman (aka Michael)

We were standing all alone
You were leaning in to speak to me
Acting like a mover shaker
Dancing to Madonna then you kissed me
And I think about it all the time
- Darren Hayes, "Chained to You"

Offline poz1970

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Re: acrophobia
« Reply #4 on: January 22, 2008, 01:35:51 am »
Did your shrink say "acrophobia" or "agoraphobia" babe?

MtD

 Not sure, but I'm guessing its the one that has something to do with leaving the house


Every time I do go out and about (like last saturday), for a few days afterwards, i'm an absolute mess.. can't sleep, grinding my teeth, etc etc :-(

It really sucks, doctor has put me forward for CBT (not cock ball torture, but cognitive behaviour therapy), but the worst thing is that when the specialist gets back to me, I'll have to leave the house for it (argh)

Anyone have experience with acrophobia, and willing to share how they got on top of it? -- my other half keeps suggesting 'desensitizing myself' to going out, but its really fucking scary every single time I go out, so I tend to go out for important things (and regret it for days after)

J

J
"The Bible contains 6 admonishments to homosexuals and 362 admonishments to  heterosexuals. That doesn`t mean that God doesn`t love heterosexuals. It`s just that they need more supervision." -- Lynn Lavne

Offline Matty the Damned

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Re: acrophobia
« Reply #5 on: January 22, 2008, 01:57:11 am »
<pedant>
Ja, I'm thinking it's "agoraphobia" honey. A fear of crowds and public places. "Acrophobia" is a fear of heights.
</pedant>

Either must suck. Good luck with the medications and what nots. :-*

MtD

Offline Robert

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Re: acrophobia
« Reply #6 on: January 22, 2008, 02:02:58 am »
I can't really help you but I  want you to know I feel this same fear creeping closer and closer and becoming pretty much a part of me and taking over.  I've managed to alienate my neighbors.  Whose next?  The shopkeepeers?

robert  
..........

Offline poz1970

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Re: acrophobia
« Reply #7 on: January 22, 2008, 02:04:35 am »
<pedant>
Ja, I'm thinking it's "agoraphobia" honey. A fear of crowds and public places. "Acrophobia" is a fear of heights.
</pedant>

Either must suck. Good luck with the medications and what nots. :-*

MtD

I kept typing agrophobia, but firefox says that word isn't in the dictionary and corrects it to acrophobia :P

J
"The Bible contains 6 admonishments to homosexuals and 362 admonishments to  heterosexuals. That doesn`t mean that God doesn`t love heterosexuals. It`s just that they need more supervision." -- Lynn Lavne

Offline Matty the Damned

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Re: acrophobia
« Reply #8 on: January 22, 2008, 02:21:18 am »
It's "agoraphobia" not "agrophobia". ;)

MtD

Offline shadowfluid

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Re: acrophobia
« Reply #9 on: January 22, 2008, 02:34:31 am »
It's "agoraphobia" not "agrophobia". ;)

MtD
i love how you corrected him three times. </bitch> :)

Hey J,

Remeron fucked me up bad. Who knows, maybe it could work for you. Can't you go back on the old anti-d you were on?  I just started Tofranil and the side effects are a plenty but not as bad as the others I've tried. (ie: celexa + remeron)
Jan 08       321/23%  VL 92,000 (very mild shingles)
Feb 1 08    Start Truvada+Viramune
March 08    470/33%  VL 320
mid-May     Start Reyataz/Norvir/Truvada
June 08      571/ 40%     VL   80
August 08   585/ 33%     VL >50
Nov  Lab error!!!!!!!!wah.
Jan 09        535      Undetectable
March 11     756

Offline DanielMark

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Re: acrophobia
« Reply #10 on: January 22, 2008, 06:09:55 am »
J,

I’ve experienced agoraphobia on many occasions. I am involved in ongoing CBT therapy, and I've learned that anxiety is a close relative to depression. They often go hand in hand.

If you can somehow take that great leap to get yourself to the therapy sessions, I'm sure you'll find them a help.

"Agoraphobia arises from an internal anxiety condition that has become so intense that the suffering individual fears going anywhere or doing anything where these feelings of panic have repeatedly occurred before. Once the panic attacks have started, these episodes become the ongoing stress, even when other more obvious pressures have diminished. This sets up a "feedback condition" which generally leads to increased numbers of panic attacks and, for some people, an increase in the situations or events which can produce panicky feelings. Others experience fearful feelings continuously, more a feeling of overall. discomfort, rather than panic.

A person may fear having anxiety attacks, "losing control", or embarrassing him/herself in such situations. Many people remain in a painful state of anxious anticipation because of these fears. Some become restricted or "housebound" while others function "normally" but with great difficulty, often attempting to hide their discomfort."

from: Agoraphobia

Daniel
MEDS: REYATAZ & KIVEXA (SINCE AUG 2008)

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Offline BT65

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Re: acrophobia
« Reply #11 on: January 22, 2008, 07:37:54 am »
I remember having "panic in public places" so bad I passed out one time while writing a check at Kroger's.  It was awful.   I couldn't go into stores, malls, or any closed in public places for a long time.  I had a bad experience on Remeron also; always eating, I gained a ton of weight.  But meds affect everyone differently.  Let us know how you're doing with all that.
I've never killed anyone, but I frequently get satisfaction reading the obituary notices.-Clarence Darrow

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Offline Oceanbeach

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Re: acrophobia
« Reply #12 on: January 22, 2008, 06:16:13 pm »
I have always had Acrophobia (fear of heights).  My dad talked about putting a saddle on the tail of his airplane so, I could ride outside.  He also talked about what would happen if the plane engine stopped and having me go out to crank the prop.  I don't remember ever riding in my dads plane.

As a teen, I would ride in cousin Jims plane, he was always looking out for a place to land IF there was an emergency.  With cousin Jim, it seemed normal until the day we were landing in Palo Alto and got caught in a cross-breeze and the wing kissed the runway.  Another time we were caught in a down draft on a new airport runway and broke a landing gear when we hit the pavement.  I do not ride in small planes, climb ladders or go up on the roof.

Since HIV/AIDS, I have some fear of public places and rarely answer the door if I do not know who is out there.  On my way to Meet and Greet for the AMG in San Francisco,  I nearly turned the car around and went home three times.  I parked in front of the lounge where the meeting was to be taking place and almost left again.  Something in my mind, clicked into place at the door, I ordered a drink, started meeting Forum friends for the first time and spent a couple days telling bad jokes.  I had the best day in years.

That was months ago and now... I still sit alone in my house and rarely answer the door IF I do not know who is out there.  Have the best day
Michael

Offline Matty the Damned

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Re: acrophobia
« Reply #13 on: January 22, 2008, 10:27:33 pm »
Ja,

I have acrophobia too. Can't handle being on ladders or near the edges of high places. I come over all dizzy and queer.

MtD

Offline BT65

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Re: acrophobia
« Reply #14 on: January 22, 2008, 10:36:29 pm »
I hate standing on a chair to change a lightbulb.
I've never killed anyone, but I frequently get satisfaction reading the obituary notices.-Clarence Darrow

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Offline mjmel

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Re: acrophobia
« Reply #15 on: January 22, 2008, 10:49:22 pm »
It's so odd -- that whole thing of people developing differing phobias.
My Jeff can't climb a 6 ft. ladder without high degree of anxiety. I'll climb on the roof of a three story house using a extension ladder with no problems.

Jeff can deliver a speech/talk to any sized group.  I panic at the mere visualization of delivering a talk or presentation to any audience. I once totally fucked up a presentation to two people. Sheesh! It was in a classroom setting so it was ''formal" -- naturally I went into a panic.

Mike M
« Last Edit: January 24, 2008, 02:46:58 pm by mjmel »

Offline bear60

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Re: acrophobia
« Reply #16 on: January 23, 2008, 11:49:46 am »
Kurt has acrophobia.
I have agoraphobia.
We cant go to The Academy Of Music for concerts because we cannot afford the high priced tickets for the 1st level and the balcony and all other seats give Kurt the frights.
I like to sit at home all day in my jammies and make soup and read posts on AidsMeds.

edited for spelling (as usual)
« Last Edit: January 24, 2008, 02:34:56 pm by bear60 »
Poz Bear Type in Philadelphia

Offline Winiroo

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Re: acrophobia
« Reply #17 on: January 23, 2008, 12:50:47 pm »
I've had anxiety in crowds of strangers for quite some time. I'm not sure when it started or why but I know I didn't have a problem with it as a kid.
Crowds of people I know doesn't bother me. But strangers bumping me or inadvertently brushing against me really gives me the willys.
Sometimes in a crowd I'll get tunnel vision and start feeling trapped or confined and make a mad dash to anyplace that looks relatively safe to me.

No clue why...

Offline bear60

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Re: acrophobia
« Reply #18 on: January 24, 2008, 02:42:21 pm »
Wini
That sounds like claustrophobia.  Yet another fear that has appeared commonly enough to have its own definition:
wikitionary

Noun
Singular
claustrophobia
  Plural
uncountable
 

claustrophobia (uncountable)

The fear of closed, tight places.
Poz Bear Type in Philadelphia

Offline PeteNYNJ

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Re: acrophobia
« Reply #19 on: January 24, 2008, 02:51:30 pm »
Klonopin should mellow you out and let you get over the initial panic of leaving the house. 

You should explore, and it sounds like you are, why you don't want to leave your safe place. 

congrats on facing you fear - step in the right direction.   Some people deal with Agoraphobia for years and it can be quite miserable.


Offline Winiroo

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Re: acrophobia
« Reply #20 on: January 24, 2008, 02:53:33 pm »
Tight places don't bother me at all. Elevators are fine unless there are a bunch of people in them.
I visited an overly stocked vintage clothing store where you could not get thru the aisles without brushing past clothes. They had clothing from the ceiling to the floor. That place was a inferno waiting to happen. It didn't bother me until people crossed my path and either refused to step out of the way or tried to push past me.

Claustrophobia does describe the feeling very well but its not the space that bothers me, its the people within the space. I am quite content being alone all day. I do crave touch but not from strangers.

I'm full of oddities

Don't get me started on the food phobias I have LOL

Offline poz1970

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Re: acrophobia
« Reply #21 on: January 24, 2008, 02:55:57 pm »
I've started back on my zoloft, which made things semi bareable

Nearly started on avanza (sp?), but the other half referred me to a billion horror stories about it .. so now its a waiting game to see if it helps again


J
"The Bible contains 6 admonishments to homosexuals and 362 admonishments to  heterosexuals. That doesn`t mean that God doesn`t love heterosexuals. It`s just that they need more supervision." -- Lynn Lavne

Offline Winiroo

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Re: acrophobia
« Reply #22 on: January 24, 2008, 02:58:29 pm »
Good luck J

Offline Florida69

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Re: acrophobia
« Reply #23 on: January 24, 2008, 03:42:42 pm »
My boyfriend, suffers from many phobia’s Zoloft has been known to help a lot, he is afraid of tight spaces, heights and I swear every time he gets a rash he goes to the doctor, and he is negative.  I hope things get better for you…   D
Nothing in the world can take the place of Persistence. Talent will not; nothing is more common than unsuccessful men with talent. Genius will not; unrewarded genius is almost a proverb. Education will not; the world is full of educated derelicts. Persistence and determination alone are omnipotent. The slogan 'Press On' has solved and always will solve the problems of the human race.
Calvin Coolidge

Offline next2u

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Re: acrophobia
« Reply #24 on: January 28, 2008, 10:53:08 pm »
im an acrophobe (is that correct?). pass the 3rd or 4th floor of a building i can't look out without experiencing something akin to vertigo. i guess i have an unrealistic fear of falling.  im hooked on meds for all plane rides and love the xanax.

enjoy.
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