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Off Topic Forums => Off Topic Forum => Topic started by: tommy246 on September 18, 2010, 08:51:57 am

Title: The new sticking vegetables and dildos up ya arse thread
Post by: tommy246 on September 18, 2010, 08:51:57 am
Hi heres a thread for anyone who likes to discuss sticking vegetables and dildos up yer arse as some posters got confused and were discussing this in the nutrition section. Enjoy.
Title: Re: The new sticking vegetables and dildos up ya arse thread
Post by: WillyWump on September 18, 2010, 09:30:17 am
Hmmm I guess you told us.

-W
Title: Re: The new sticking vegetables and dildos up ya arse thread
Post by: mecch on September 18, 2010, 09:50:32 am
Well I was just wondering if we could briefly discuss in this thread the Iranian nuclear threat and Israel's appropriate response.  Iranian eggplants and zucchinis are renown among the foodies for their size, silky smooth lustrous skin, and flavour. And then there's the caviar.  When I'm in Paris I'll have the caviar at petrossian, or maybe a big plate of oysters near the Opera, and soon enough I'll be horny to stick some Persian eggplants up my arse.  Its a luxury I can treat myself to, once and awhile.
Now, while I'll sometimes have no choice in Switzerland but to buy hothouse tomatoes and herbs from Israel, I don't care for the carbon footprint, and resent the fact European supermarkets are offering only imported good for everyday consumption. 
So, basically, if Iran threatens to nuke Israel, and Israel, rightly nukes Iran in preventive strikes, I can kiss my caviar binges and eggplant fucks goodbye.
Title: Re: The new sticking vegetables and dildos up ya arse thread
Post by: Dachshund on September 18, 2010, 10:41:08 am
Hi heres a thread for anyone who likes to discuss sticking vegetables and dildos up yer arse as some posters got confused and were discussing this in the nutrition section. Enjoy.

Honey we weren't confused. Unfortunately in some people the virus eradicates any sense of humor.
Title: Re: The new sticking vegetables and dildos up ya arse thread
Post by: Ann on September 18, 2010, 11:05:20 am
Unfortunately in some people the virus eradicates any sense of humor.

Too bad there's not a blood test for that. Everyone could include that value in their signature line numbers history so we'd know when to be careful. ;)
Title: Re: The new sticking vegetables and dildos up ya arse thread
Post by: Hellraiser on September 18, 2010, 11:06:43 am
Too bad there's not a blood test for that. Everyone could include that value in their signature line numbers history so we'd know when to be careful. ;)

Comedic Enzymes: approaching 0.  =(
Title: Re: The new sticking vegetables and dildos up ya arse thread
Post by: Miss Philicia on September 18, 2010, 11:12:10 am
I trust the OP disclosed and took care not to get super-infected.
Title: Re: The new sticking vegetables and dildos up ya arse thread
Post by: Hellraiser on September 18, 2010, 11:13:23 am
I trust the OP disclosed and took care not to get super-infected.

The Vegetable Immunodeficiency Virus (VIV) is serious business.
Title: Re: The new sticking vegetables and dildos up ya arse thread
Post by: Rev. Moon on September 18, 2010, 11:15:37 am
Honey we weren't confused. Unfortunately in some people the virus eradicates any sense of humor.

Too bad there's not a blood test for that. Everyone could include that value in their signature line numbers history so we'd know when to be careful. ;)

Sense of humor = Undetectable
Passive-Aggressiveness = 2.4 million copies per mL
Title: Re: The new sticking vegetables and dildos up ya arse thread
Post by: leatherman on September 18, 2010, 11:19:01 am
emoticons ;D, which are not used here near enough when people are only interjecting "humorous" posts  ::) rather than staying on-topic, were designed with the intent to help with understanding the humor/sarcasm level of online chatter ;)
Title: Re: The new sticking vegetables and dildos up ya arse thread
Post by: Hellraiser on September 18, 2010, 11:19:30 am
emoticons ;D, which are not used here near enough when people are only interjecting "humorous" posts  ::) rather than staying on-topic, were designed with the intent to help with understanding the humor/sarcasm level of online chatter ;)

Love ya, but too much is worse than not enough!
Title: Re: The new sticking vegetables and dildos up ya arse thread
Post by: Rev. Moon on September 18, 2010, 11:20:54 am
emoticons ;D, which are not used here near enough when people are only interjecting "humorous" posts  ::) rather than staying on-topic, were designed with the intent to help with understanding the humor/sarcasm level of online chatter ;)

And seeing more than one emoticon in a paragraph makes me want to vomit.  So... No.
Title: Re: The new sticking vegetables and dildos up ya arse thread
Post by: Miss Philicia on September 18, 2010, 11:23:26 am
I wish there was an emoticon for corpses.
Title: Re: The new sticking vegetables and dildos up ya arse thread
Post by: Dachshund on September 18, 2010, 11:25:05 am
Most people are sophisticated enough to "get" humor without visual aids. Putting a  ;) behind a dumb comment changes nothing, it's still dumb.
Title: Re: The new sticking vegetables and dildos up ya arse thread
Post by: Assurbanipal on September 18, 2010, 11:40:36 am
And seeing more than one emoticon in a paragraph makes me want to vomit.  So... No.

Stand back  :o :o :o :o :o :o :o :o :o :o
Title: Re: The new sticking vegetables and dildos up ya arse thread
Post by: Rev. Moon on September 18, 2010, 11:43:56 am
Stand back  :o :o :o :o :o :o :o :o :o :o

(http://i812.photobucket.com/albums/zz42/livebythemoon/images.jpg) (http://i812.photobucket.com/albums/zz42/livebythemoon/DownloadedFile.jpg)
Title: Re: The new sticking vegetables and dildos up ya arse thread
Post by: MitchMiller on September 18, 2010, 01:03:24 pm
Has anyone tried coffee suppositories?

http://www.peak-health-now.com/xeneplex_coffee_suppositories.html (http://www.peak-health-now.com/xeneplex_coffee_suppositories.html)
Title: Re: The new sticking vegetables and dildos up ya arse thread
Post by: denb45 on September 18, 2010, 01:54:02 pm
Has anyone tried coffee suppositories?

http://www.peak-health-now.com/xeneplex_coffee_suppositories.html (http://www.peak-health-now.com/xeneplex_coffee_suppositories.html)


I rather drink my coffee then put it up my ass  ;D
Title: Re: The new sticking vegetables and dildos up ya arse thread
Post by: sharkdiver on September 18, 2010, 02:03:31 pm
I rather drink my coffee then put it up my ass  ;D

ah come on, i heard it's all the rage in Costa Rica.
Title: Re: The new sticking vegetables and dildos up ya arse thread
Post by: tommy246 on September 18, 2010, 02:35:46 pm
i bet  you all have a gang hut where you meet up occasionally .
Title: Re: The new sticking vegetables and dildos up ya arse thread
Post by: Ann on September 18, 2010, 02:36:47 pm

i bet  you all have a gang hut where you meet up occasionally .

It's called a cottage. :)
Title: Re: The new sticking vegetables and dildos up ya arse thread
Post by: Rev. Moon on September 18, 2010, 03:09:56 pm
i bet  you all have a gang hut where you meet up occasionally .

Yessum, we hold a weekly bacchanalia with vegetables and coconut oil.  At the end we hold an intense exploration of our sensory pleasures in a hyperbaric chamber.  Cuz we's got good friends, a positive attitude about teh AIDS, and lots of fundages.
Title: Re: The new sticking vegetables and dildos up ya arse thread
Post by: Oceanbeach on September 18, 2010, 04:03:23 pm
Since becoming infected with HIV, I prefer to be a "top" and in consideration, we should have a special thread for people who put their vegetables/dildos up the arse of others   ;D  Have the best day
Michael
Title: Re: The new sticking vegetables and dildos up ya arse thread
Post by: phildinftlaudy on September 18, 2010, 05:14:08 pm
I don't really feel like discussing sticking vegetables and dildos up my ass in this thread - been there done that -

perhaps, we could talk about what vitamins and nutritional supplements everyone is taking?   

Just a thought --  ;D
Title: Re: The new sticking vegetables and dildos up ya arse thread
Post by: Miss Philicia on September 18, 2010, 05:17:26 pm

perhaps, we could talk about what vitamins and nutritional supplements everyone is taking?   


I knew you took teh vitamins, u filthy little liar!

::puts philthyNftl on ignore::
Title: Re: The new sticking vegetables and dildos up ya arse thread
Post by: phildinftlaudy on September 18, 2010, 05:21:55 pm
I knew you took teh vitamins, u filthy little liar!

::puts philthyNftl on ignore::
Ms. P - Please don't put me on ignore --- I feel a hole in my heart, an emptiness in my stomach --- but strangely my sinuses suddenly cleared up

Oh and for the record - no vitamins or supplements here --- I have a bottle of B-Complex in the med cabinet that has been there full (less 1 pill) for about a year.
Title: Re: The new sticking vegetables and dildos up ya arse thread
Post by: jkinatl2 on September 18, 2010, 05:23:06 pm
I go through my gummi vitamins pretty fast.
Title: Re: The new sticking vegetables and dildos up ya arse thread
Post by: Rev. Moon on September 18, 2010, 05:27:55 pm
I go through my gummi vitamins pretty fast.

I wash down my Atripla every night with a delicious tea made with echinacea and St. John's wort.
Title: Re: The new sticking vegetables and dildos up ya arse thread
Post by: phildinftlaudy on September 18, 2010, 05:30:58 pm
I wash down my Atripla every night with a delicious tea made with echinacea and St. John's wort.
I had a wart once ---
several - nothing a little lasor therapy and deep freeze couldn't take care of - never thought of using it with tea --- what a great supplement.
Title: Re: The new sticking vegetables and dildos up ya arse thread
Post by: Rev. Moon on September 18, 2010, 05:33:23 pm
I had a wart once ---
several - nothing a little lasor therapy and deep freeze couldn't take care of - never thought of using it with tea --- what a great supplement.

was it an anal wart, you sex obssessed sodomite?  ;D ;) :)
Title: Re: The new sticking vegetables and dildos up ya arse thread
Post by: Jeff G on September 18, 2010, 05:35:59 pm
Never use corn as a dildo you will just confuse your asshole .
Title: Re: The new sticking vegetables and dildos up ya arse thread
Post by: phildinftlaudy on September 18, 2010, 05:38:05 pm
was it an anal wart, you sex obssessed sodomite?  ;D ;) :)
well yes of course - i wouldn't be a good gay pozzie if I hadn't had a bout of the "a" warts -

they probably make for some tasty nutritious tea -

Much more nutritional value then your run of the miill wart or plantar wart -

Of course, these statements have not been evaluated by the Food and Drug Administration -

But, they would probably be cheaper then most of the other supplements that people spend money on -
Title: Re: The new sticking vegetables and dildos up ya arse thread
Post by: mecch on September 18, 2010, 05:48:18 pm
I wash down my Atripla every night with a delicious tea made with echinacea and St. John's wort.

I thought echinacea was a no no for HIV+ people.
Title: Re: The new sticking vegetables and dildos up ya arse thread
Post by: Rev. Moon on September 18, 2010, 05:52:08 pm
I thought echinacea was a no no for HIV+ people.

you got that right, love.  And the St. John's wort is supposed to be a no-no for acripla users as there is some negative interaction with the drug.
Title: Re: The new sticking vegetables and dildos up ya arse thread
Post by: northernguy on September 18, 2010, 05:52:40 pm
I rather drink my coffee then put it up my ass  ;D

There's a very striking Filipino barrista at my local Starbucks I'd love to put up my ass.  Coffee would be optional.
Title: Re: The new sticking vegetables and dildos up ya arse thread
Post by: phildinftlaudy on September 18, 2010, 05:54:46 pm
you got that right, love.  And the St. John's wort is supposed to be a no-no for acripla users as there is some negative interaction with the drug.
How did a saint get so famous as to have a wart named after him?  Is this related to another catholic priest sex scandal???
Title: Re: The new sticking vegetables and dildos up ya arse thread
Post by: mecch on September 18, 2010, 05:55:46 pm
Ah you didnt use the  ;) so I was confused.  I dont shove persian eggplants up my ass.  or do i? so confusing
Title: Re: The new sticking vegetables and dildos up ya arse thread
Post by: Rev. Moon on September 18, 2010, 06:04:15 pm
How did a saint get so famous as to have a wart named after him?  Is this related to another catholic priest sex scandal???

Possibly maybe.  He must have been playing hide the cucumber with an uncircumcised Roman leader.  According to shittypedia (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Saint_John%27s_Wort) the plant is also called chase-devil.  He also had spelling issues.

Ah you didnt use the  ;) so I was confused.  I dont shove persian eggplants up my ass.  or do i? so confusing

I know, I keep forgetting the smileys.  Not taking my vitamins is affecting mah memory.
Title: Re: The new sticking vegetables and dildos up ya arse thread
Post by: phildinftlaudy on September 18, 2010, 06:09:55 pm
Possibly maybe.  He must have been playing hide the cucumber with an uncircumcised Roman leader.  According to shittypedia (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Saint_John%27s_Wort) the plant is also called chase-devil.  He also had spelling issues.

I know, I keep forgetting the smileys.  Not taking my vitamins is affecting mah memory.

In this day and age of spel chek I can't figure out why peopl can't spell wright.  So annoying.

If you take ginko that will help with the memory issues related to the use of emoticons. ;D :D ;) :o 8)

I just took a handful of them   :P ::) :'( :o
Title: Re: The new sticking vegetables and dildos up ya arse thread
Post by: Rev. Moon on September 18, 2010, 06:21:37 pm
In this day and age of spel chek I can't figure out why peopl can't spell wright.  So annoying.

If you take ginko that will help with the memory issues related to the use of emoticons. ;D :D ;) :o 8)

I just took a handful of them   :P ::) :'( :o

Ginko gives me headaches.  I'd rather snort poppers.
Title: Re: The new sticking vegetables and dildos up ya arse thread
Post by: phildinftlaudy on September 18, 2010, 06:28:06 pm
Ginko gives me headaches.  I'd rather snort poppers.
Snorting poppers helpeed me to becum a better spellor.
Title: Re: The new sticking vegetables and dildos up ya arse thread
Post by: Oceanbeach on September 18, 2010, 06:45:47 pm
(_o_)   ;D  Have the best day
Michael
(with admiration of Rondrond for the Butticon creations)
Title: Re: The new sticking vegetables and dildos up ya arse thread
Post by: BT65 on September 18, 2010, 08:45:02 pm
Well, I don't know about sticking veggies and dildos up my ass, but I can think of another place.  And it's just about that time of night, too.
Title: Re: The new sticking vegetables and dildos up ya arse thread
Post by: Ann on September 18, 2010, 11:38:49 pm
Well, I don't know about sticking veggies and dildos up my ass, but I can think of another place.  And it's just about that time of night, too.


How about both at once? Woman, I thought you knew this stuff.
Title: Re: The new sticking vegetables and dildos up ya arse thread
Post by: aztecan on September 19, 2010, 12:49:46 am
Well, there was this ex con who I met just a day or so after he got out of prison.

He had this thing for oily Armenian cucumbers. The fun part was, after the fun, we ate the evidence.

HUGS,

Mark
Title: Re: The new sticking vegetables and dildos up ya arse thread
Post by: Snowangel on September 19, 2010, 01:11:08 am
Never use corn as a dildo you will just confuse your asshole .

I think this might be the funniest thread I have ever read, you guys had me rolling....ooohh had to stop myself from using an emoticon. My bad.
Title: Re: The new sticking vegetables and dildos up ya arse thread
Post by: phildinftlaudy on September 19, 2010, 10:40:21 am
PHILDINFTLAUDY'S TOP 10 REASONS FOR STICKING A VEGETABLE AND DILDO UP YOUR ARSE (based on David Letterman's Top 10 List Concept)

10. Vegetables and Dildos - if cleaned properly - contain absolutely no risk of transmitting HIV.  (this one is for Ann, RapidRod, Rev, Matty, Andy, David, and the rest of the AMI thread moderators)
9.  Using vegetables and dildos saves on the cost of condoms
8.  Vegetables and dildos don't talk back
7.  Vegetables and dildos usually have more endurance then some of our previous hook ups
6.  Can kill two birds with one stone when using vegetables - sexual satisfaction and a nice dinner salad
5.  Don't have to pay for cab fare after finishing the "deed"
4.  Eliminates the need to say "Wow, I could've had a V-8" after being dissatisfied with a human partner
3.  Different vegetables available for different seasons adds variety to your sex life
2.  Helps in our efforts of "going green" and lowers carbon footprint (biodegradeable - break down easier than condoms)
and the number 1 reason for sticking vegetables and dildos up your ass -
1.  Sure as hell beats taking a vitamin or other supplement - and probably more effective in making you feel better  ;D
Title: Re: The new sticking vegetables and dildos up ya arse thread
Post by: WillyWump on September 19, 2010, 11:18:48 am
I cant say I've ever had a veggie up the chute, however years ago I put a Hillshire Farm sausage up there (with a condom of course) to see how a penis might feel. That seemed to go Ok, so of course I graduated to Penis's

-Will
Title: Re: The new sticking vegetables and dildos up ya arse thread
Post by: phildinftlaudy on September 19, 2010, 11:22:27 am
I cant say I've ever had a veggie up the chute, however years ago I put a Hillshire Farm sausage up there (with a condom of course) to see how a penis might feel. That seemed to go Ok, so of course I graduated to Penis's

-Will
Will, you brought back my memory of putting a hotdog up the arse when I was about 13, I stuck it too far up and almost was not able to pull it back out.  I was scared to death that I was going to have to call my parents in and tell them I had a weiner stuck up my ass.

It taught me a valuable lesson -- size does matter.
Title: Re: The new sticking vegetables and dildos up ya arse thread
Post by: Rev. Moon on September 19, 2010, 11:23:08 am
I cant say I've ever had a veggie up the chute, however years ago I put a Hillshire Farm sausage up there (with a condom of course) to see how a penis might feel. That seemed to go Ok, so of course I graduated to Penis's

-Will

And got yourself an HIV scholarship.
Title: Re: The new sticking vegetables and dildos up ya arse thread
Post by: WillyWump on September 19, 2010, 11:36:48 am
And got yourself an HIV scholarship.

Yes, there is that.

Perhaps there's a lawsuit against Hillshire Farms there somewhere.

@Phil - call my parents in and tell them I had a weiner stuck up my ass. - Cannot stop laughing!! ROFLMAO




Title: Re: The new sticking vegetables and dildos up ya arse thread
Post by: phildinftlaudy on September 19, 2010, 01:25:49 pm
PHILDINFTLAUDY'S TOP 10 REASONS FOR STICKING A VEGETABLE AND DILDO UP YOUR ARSE (based on David Letterman's Top 10 List Concept)

10. Vegetables and Dildos - if cleaned properly - contain absolutely no risk of transmitting HIV.  (this one is for Ann, RapidRod, Rev, Matty, Andy, David, and the rest of the AMI thread moderators)
9.  Using vegetables and dildos saves on the cost of condoms
8.  Vegetables and dildos don't talk back
7.  Vegetables and dildos usually have more endurance then some of our previous hook ups
6.  Can kill two birds with one stone when using vegetables - sexual satisfaction and a nice dinner salad
5.  Don't have to pay for cab fare after finishing the "deed"
4.  Eliminates the need to say "Wow, I could've had a V-8" after being dissatisfied with a human partner
3.  Different vegetables available for different seasons adds variety to your sex life
2.  Helps in our efforts of "going green" and lowers carbon footprint (biodegradeable - break down easier than condoms)
and the number 1 reason for sticking vegetables and dildos up your ass -
1.  Sure as hell beats taking a vitamin or other supplement - and probably more effective in making you feel better  ;D
Addendum from a friend:
- Cucumbers don't mind sharing the fridge with other cucumbers.
Title: Re: The new sticking vegetables and dildos up ya arse thread
Post by: northernguy on September 19, 2010, 11:29:12 pm
Who's ready to tackle this:

http://images.wisconsinhistory.org/700004020037/0402000760-l.jpg
Title: Re: The new sticking vegetables and dildos up ya arse thread
Post by: aztecan on September 19, 2010, 11:40:01 pm
I like winter squash well enough, but, I that one is a bit out of my league.




Title: Re: The new sticking vegetables and dildos up ya arse thread
Post by: jkinatl2 on September 19, 2010, 11:40:51 pm
I once stuck a Han Solo action figure up my butt, as an eleven year old.

Later on, I melted it in the family fireplace, as an exciting conclusion to my seven-part snow Star Wars festival.

Title: Re: The new sticking vegetables and dildos up ya arse thread
Post by: Oceanbeach on September 20, 2010, 04:35:10 am
This thread makes me want to break into song...  Tonight, I've chosen the theme song to Gypsy.

Lettuce us entertain you
Lettuce make you smile
We can do a few tricks
Some old and then some new tricks
We are very versatile 

We'll have a real good time YES SIR, oh, we'll have a real good time
 ;D  Have the best day
Michael
Title: Re: The new sticking vegetables and dildos up ya arse thread
Post by: denb45 on September 20, 2010, 08:58:49 am
This thread makes me want to break into song...  Tonight, I've chosen the theme song to Gypsy.

Lettuce us entertain you
Lettuce make you smile
We can do a few tricks
Some old and then some new tricks
We are very versatile 

We'll have a real good time YES SIR, oh, we'll have a real good time
 ;D  Have the best day
Michael

Yes I'm very versatile always have been most of my life, but, also found out that a lot of my Gay Peers didn't like this fact, but hey I always said to them....FUCK EM if they cannot take a joke, cause the joke was really on them, and not me  ;D
Title: Re: The new sticking vegetables and dildos up ya arse thread
Post by: skeebo1969 on September 20, 2010, 01:32:59 pm
I once stuck a Han Solo action figure up my butt, as an eleven year old.

Later on, I melted it in the family fireplace, as an exciting conclusion to my seven-part snow Star Wars festival.

Huh...  When I was a kid I once took my friends entire GI Joe collection into the bathroom with me and scooped shit out of the toilet with their heads.  Then I put them back on the shelf in his room.  He didn't realize it till about 3 days later, remember this was pre-meds for me.  He's actually on my friends list on FB now, told me via private message I was "mean as a kid".  Amazing how some people just can't take a joke.

Which brings me to my next question:

Is this the best fucking tattoo or what?

(http://boortz.com/images/funny/redneck_pics_tattoo4.jpg)
Title: Re: The new sticking vegetables and dildos up ya arse thread
Post by: Jeff G on September 20, 2010, 01:40:45 pm
Huh...  When I was a kid I once took my friends entire GI Joe collection into the bathroom with me and scooped shit out of the toilet with their heads.  Then I put them back on the shelf in his room.  He didn't realize it till about 3 days later, remember this was pre-meds for me.  He's actually on my friends list on FB now, told me via private message I was "mean as a kid".  Amazing how some people just can't take a joke.

Which brings me to my next question:

Is this the best fucking tattoo or what?

(http://boortz.com/images/funny/redneck_pics_tattoo4.jpg)



All you need is a little bit of deodorant stuck in that armpit hair and you got yourself a yeast infection .
Title: Re: The new sticking vegetables and dildos up ya arse thread
Post by: Rev. Moon on September 20, 2010, 01:47:41 pm


All you need is a little bit of deodorant stuck in that armpit hair and you got yourself a yeast infection .

If you use one of those clear type of roll-on deodorants it would look like a very moist poosay --which reminds me of a certain thread that's been floating around the Aii? part of the forum.
Title: Re: The new sticking vegetables and dildos up ya arse thread
Post by: Jeff G on September 20, 2010, 01:52:04 pm
If you use one of those clear type of roll-on deodorants it would look like a very moist poosay --which reminds me of a certain thread that's been floating around the Aii? part of the forum.


Giggles ... that part of the forum is my guilty pleasure . :-[
Title: Re: The new sticking vegetables and dildos up ya arse thread
Post by: Ann on September 20, 2010, 01:53:53 pm
Giggles ... that part of the forum is my guilty pleasure . :-[

Really? It drives me nucking futs.
Title: Re: The new sticking vegetables and dildos up ya arse thread
Post by: Miss Philicia on September 20, 2010, 01:55:34 pm
Why is Skeebsloma sniffing hairy redneck armpit?
Title: Re: The new sticking vegetables and dildos up ya arse thread
Post by: Rev. Moon on September 20, 2010, 01:58:39 pm
Why is Skeebsloma sniffing hairy redneck armpit?


The redneck is kinda cute.
Title: Re: The new sticking vegetables and dildos up ya arse thread
Post by: Jeff G on September 20, 2010, 02:03:30 pm
Really? It drives me nucking futs.


I promise you thats not the part I giggle over  ;)
Title: Re: The new sticking vegetables and dildos up ya arse thread
Post by: Rev. Moon on September 20, 2010, 02:11:43 pm

I promise you thats not the part I giggle over  ;)

From the recent ones I have giggled over the following:

1. The guy who tasted fluid from a "very wet vagina"
2. The one who got cum on his pee-pee's head
3. And, especially, the one who calls himself a LTS!

edited fro tpyo
Title: Re: The new sticking vegetables and dildos up ya arse thread
Post by: Ann on September 20, 2010, 02:14:45 pm
Oh man, the guy who thought he was an LTS had me banging my head on my desk. Repeatedly.
Title: Re: The new sticking vegetables and dildos up ya arse thread
Post by: skeebo1969 on September 20, 2010, 02:18:05 pm


   Maybe LTS meant something else to him...

(http://www.notforprofitsoftware.com/images/new%20LTS.jpg)
Title: Re: The new sticking vegetables and dildos up ya arse thread
Post by: Oceanbeach on September 20, 2010, 03:28:17 pm
"If this tune doesn't put the cunt in country music, nothin will"~ Carlene Carter

Swap Meat Rag- Carlene Carter

Swap-meat the American way
You can have it twice a day
It's indoor recreation at its best

Hold me back, it's just too much
I've never seen the likes of such
I must admit it beats the bars
No broken hearts or nasty scars

Swap- meat the American way
You can have it twice a day
Swap- meat the American way
Swap- meat the American way
Swap-meat the American way

 ;D  Have the best day
Michael
Title: Re: The new sticking vegetables and dildos up ya arse thread
Post by: Hellraiser on September 21, 2010, 01:00:48 am

The redneck is kinda cute.

You're damn right he is.  He'd have to keep that arm down though.
Title: Re: The new sticking vegetables and dildos up ya arse thread
Post by: Matty the Damned on September 21, 2010, 01:04:28 am
You're damn right he is.  He'd have to keep that arm down though.

He's lucky to have it, really. What with all the redneck arm disease going about of late.

MtD
Title: Re: The new sticking vegetables and dildos up ya arse thread
Post by: Hellraiser on September 21, 2010, 01:07:10 am
He's lucky to have it, really. What with all the redneck arm disease going about of late.

MtD

Touche.
Title: Re: The new sticking vegetables and dildos up ya arse thread
Post by: Miss Philicia on September 21, 2010, 01:07:59 am
this is way sexier

(http://i1007.photobucket.com/albums/af197/bedstuy65/HairyArmpit.jpg)
Title: Re: The new sticking vegetables and dildos up ya arse thread
Post by: Matty the Damned on September 21, 2010, 01:08:34 am
Touche.

Indeed. Positively Wildean, am I not?

MtD
Title: Re: The new sticking vegetables and dildos up ya arse thread
Post by: Hellraiser on September 21, 2010, 01:09:31 am
Positively Wildean, am I not?

MtD

Half right anyway.
Title: Re: The new sticking vegetables and dildos up ya arse thread
Post by: Matty the Damned on September 21, 2010, 01:12:50 am
Half right anyway.

Well done! That was almost a sentence! You're really making progress. Have a gold star for effort.

(http://tool.shagnasty.net/wiki/images/1/12/Goldstar.gif)

MtD
Title: Re: The new sticking vegetables and dildos up ya arse thread
Post by: Hellraiser on September 21, 2010, 01:15:04 am
Well done! That was almost a sentence! You're really making progress. Have a gold star for effort.

(http://tool.shagnasty.net/wiki/images/1/12/Goldstar.gif)

MtD

I maintain that I am a gold star gay which brings us back to why I would want him to keep his arm down.
Title: Re: The new sticking vegetables and dildos up ya arse thread
Post by: Matty the Damned on September 21, 2010, 01:17:59 am
I maintain that I am a gold star gay which brings us back to why I would want him to keep his arm down.

I think it's because the smell reminds you of your mother. But think of the advantages his uplifted arm could offer. At a BBQ he would keep the flies off the meat.

MtD
Title: Re: The new sticking vegetables and dildos up ya arse thread
Post by: Hellraiser on September 21, 2010, 01:29:46 am
I think it's because the smell reminds you of your mother. But think of the advantages his uplifted arm could offer. At a BBQ he would keep the flies off the meat.

MtD

A modified your mom joke, really?  The epitome of wit.

I give it a 3.5 for for effort but a 0 for originality.
Title: Re: The new sticking vegetables and dildos up ya arse thread
Post by: Matty the Damned on September 21, 2010, 01:33:58 am
A modified your mom joke, really?  The epitome of wit.

I give it a 3.5 for for effort but a 0 for originality.

I think you'll find "Originality" starts with the letter "O" not the numeral "0".

Do try to keep up.

MtD
Title: Re: The new sticking vegetables and dildos up ya arse thread
Post by: tommy246 on September 22, 2010, 12:06:39 pm
Hi heres a thread for anyone who likes to discuss sticking vegetables and dildos up yer arse as some posters got confused and were discussing this in the nutrition section. Enjoy.

i went out last night for the first time in a good while and woooo what a night i met a gorgoeus russian girl in 6 inch stilletoes ( shoe fetish yes ) im back wooo what a night.
Title: Re: The new sticking vegetables and dildos up ya arse thread
Post by: phildinftlaudy on September 22, 2010, 12:13:36 pm
Dang --- I still would like to talk about what vitamins and supplements everyone is taking --- please, pretty please..... pretty please with flinstones chewables on top..... ;D
Title: Re: The new sticking vegetables and dildos up ya arse thread
Post by: Rev. Moon on September 22, 2010, 12:17:19 pm

i went out last night for the first time in a good while and woooo what a night i met a gorgoeus russian girl in 6 inch stilletoes ( shoe fetish yes ) im back wooo what a night.

1. What did your wife have to say about this?
2. Will this poor Russian woman be asking us questions in the 'am I infected' section?  I hope you disclosed.
3. What does the CDC have to say about stilettos?
Title: Re: The new sticking vegetables and dildos up ya arse thread
Post by: Jeff G on September 22, 2010, 12:24:55 pm

i went out last night for the first time in a good while and woooo what a night i met a gorgoeus russian girl in 6 inch stilletoes ( shoe fetish yes ) im back wooo what a night.

Good to know ... I was wondering when someone was going to put a foot up your ass .
Title: Re: The new sticking vegetables and dildos up ya arse thread
Post by: Rev. Moon on September 22, 2010, 12:28:21 pm
Good to know ... I was wondering when someone was going to put a foot up your ass .

Wouldn't that require for him to first pull out his own head?  I believe he likes living that way.
Title: Re: The new sticking vegetables and dildos up ya arse thread
Post by: Jeff G on September 22, 2010, 12:30:03 pm
Wouldn't that require for him to first pull out his own head?  I believe he likes living that way.

I think he just got the boot  :o
Title: Re: The new sticking vegetables and dildos up ya arse thread
Post by: phildinftlaudy on September 22, 2010, 12:33:03 pm
I think he just got the boot  :o
yeah  :(     so sad.....

So, anyone want to talk about getting vegetables and dildos up ya arse?  lol
Title: Re: The new sticking vegetables and dildos up ya arse thread
Post by: Jeff G on September 22, 2010, 12:34:20 pm
yeah  :(     so sad.....

So, anyone want to talk about getting vegetables and dildos up ya arse?  lol

As long as we leave off the Russian dressing .
Title: Re: The new sticking vegetables and dildos up ya arse thread
Post by: jkinatl2 on September 22, 2010, 01:55:18 pm
I think it is time for someone to start a sticky  thread in Recently Infected or Living With about transmission vectors. I cannot believe the level of ignorance some people carry about HIV and AIDS, and as those with the butt bug, it is IMPERATIVE that we know what is and is not a risk. Bad enough that other people think toothbrushes and kisses transmit HIV. When we think that, we are perpetuating all sorts of ugly stigma.

Title: Re: The new sticking vegetables and dildos up ya arse thread
Post by: Ann on September 22, 2010, 02:04:04 pm
I think it is time for someone to start a sticky  thread in Recently Infected or Living With about transmission vectors. I cannot believe the level of ignorance some people carry about HIV and AIDS, and as those with the butt bug, it is IMPERATIVE that we know what is and is not a risk. Bad enough that other people think toothbrushes and kisses transmit HIV. When we think that, we are perpetuating all sorts of ugly stigma.

Not a bad idea, Jonathan. I'll take it up with Tim tomorrow.
Title: Re: The new sticking vegetables and dildos up ya arse thread
Post by: Miss Philicia on September 22, 2010, 02:06:56 pm
I agree.  This would be very good information as a stickie in the "I Just Tested Poz" forum.
Title: Re: The new sticking vegetables and dildos up ya arse thread
Post by: jkinatl2 on September 22, 2010, 02:19:36 pm
Thanks Ann. I posted something to this effect in that toothbrush thread too, as I did not know how many went from LIVING WITH to the seedier grounds of OFF TOPIC.

I am glad my hair is too short to grab. I would be pulling it out, over that stuff. On the topic of sticky threads, and tangential to this one, maybe a disclaimer about supplements or a general rundown of drug interactions (or links to the LESSONS section that deals with that) would be helpful in the NUTRITION section?

I mean really, how many times do we need to have the Colloidal Silver discussion?

Title: Re: The new sticking vegetables and dildos up ya arse thread
Post by: Ann on September 22, 2010, 02:30:53 pm
I agree.  This would be very good information as a stickie in the "I Just Tested Poz" forum.

No, if we do it, I think it should be in Living. After all, Dingowarrier isn't newly diagnosed and he's the person who started the toothbrush thread.
Title: Re: The new sticking vegetables and dildos up ya arse thread
Post by: jkinatl2 on September 22, 2010, 02:32:49 pm
No, if we do it, I think it should be in Living. After all, Dingowarrier isn't newly diagnosed and he's the person who started the toothbrush thread.

THAT was the most disheartening/aggravating part of all.

Title: Re: The new sticking vegetables and dildos up ya arse thread
Post by: CaptCarl on September 22, 2010, 07:47:53 pm

Giggles ... that part of the forum is my guilty pleasure . :-[

After careful consideration, and checking of said Forum, I must concur. Except the part about guilt, I have no guilt over being so thoroughly entertained by some of what I have read there. I can only hope that our Dear Ann doesn't go on some sort of Kill-Crazy Rampage after explaining things for the eleventy billionth time.

CaptCarl
Title: Re: The new sticking vegetables and dildos up ya arse thread
Post by: Assurbanipal on September 22, 2010, 10:01:36 pm
THAT was the most disheartening/aggravating part of all.



Well, if you are disheartened and aggravated you should go back and reread what he said

Well, to be honest, this was my wifes idea to post, she is a nervous nelly, but i figure I'd tried to make her feel better and post..I do know,but I at times still feel crappy bout this whole thing,and at times I feel I owe it to her if things like this (posting)makes her feel better.

What on earth is a support forum for if not to reassure, even when people know they "shouldn't" need reassurance? 

Title: Re: The new sticking vegetables and dildos up ya arse thread
Post by: Tim Horn on September 23, 2010, 08:23:16 am
I've got to agree with Assurbanipal here.

I realize its frustrating to keep repeating the same basic HIV transmission information in the "Am I Infected" forum. I like to think that our HIV transmission lesson is one of the most nuanced available -- it was written and posted with tremendous input from Ann, Andy and Jonathan. While it might be necessary to freshen up the content a little bit, one thing to keep in mind is that the vast majority of people visiting "Am I" will always think that their experience differs -- "okay, so I know I can't get HIV from fingering a woman, but what if she's a sex worker, had blood in her genital fluids and there was a small cut on my finger" -- that will require some hand-holding (and a whole lot of tough love) from an actual expert in the forums. No matter how much detail we put into the HIV transmission lesson, and no matter how prominent we feature it in a sticky or elsewhere, most "Am I" participants are going to want dialog to allay their fears. Fortunately, everyone does a great job of encouraging people to first read the HIV transmission lesson before spewing anxiety in the "Am I" forum.

I'd like to think that we can be a little more patient and forgiving with people who are actually living with HIV -- for whom these forums were originally intended --  who post even the most basic concerns in the "Newly Infected" and "Living With" forums. Yes, we should expect people living with HIV to have a basic understanding of how their virus is and is not transmitted and I do think this should be the place where they can get such information, without judgment or fear that they will be taken to task for asking seemingly "stupid" questions. For someone living with HIV, there's simply no such thing as a stupid question -- and quite frankly, I'd much rather see someone ask a basic question here than most other places.

We've seen this in the past -- people living with HIV with children in the same house tend to be hyper concerned about HIV transmission. Though many of these concerns are lacking in basis, they're certainly very natural and understandable.

Fortunately, such basic questions among those actually living with HIV in these forums are few and far between. I think we can all afford to be a little more forgiving, in the actual forums for people living with HIV, because of this.

I'm not exactly thrilled how the now-infamous toothbrush thread played out. Dingowarrior isn't the first, and won't be the last, person living with HIV to ask a basic question about HIV transmission. In fact, it was a good question, given that the CDC says one thing and there is plenty of experience and information to the contrary that we can reasonably discuss here.

Just my two cents...

Tim
Title: Re: The new sticking vegetables and dildos up ya arse thread
Post by: Ann on September 23, 2010, 08:43:34 am
After discussing this stickied transmission information idea with Tim, I'm in agreement with him that it would serve no real purpose. People want to be individually reassured and that's totally understandable.

In addition to Tim's comments, I came to realise that people often don't bother clicking on the stickied Welcome Threads - where they'll find links to the Lessons, including the Transmission Lesson - and they're not going to be any more likely to click on a stickied transmission thread either.

I hope we can all show some patience - me included, and I know how frustrating it can be sometimes - when these types of questions come up. We're here to support each other and learn from each other.

Ann
Title: Re: The new sticking vegetables and dildos up ya arse thread
Post by: jkinatl2 on September 23, 2010, 12:23:54 pm
After discussing this stickied transmission information idea with Tim, I'm in agreement with him that it would serve no real purpose. People want to be individually reassured and that's totally understandable.

In addition to Tim's comments, I came to realise that people often don't bother clicking on the stickied Welcome Threads - where they'll find links to the Lessons, including the Transmission Lesson - and they're not going to be any more likely to click on a stickied transmission thread either.

I hope we can all show some patience - me included, and I know how frustrating it can be sometimes - when these types of questions come up. We're here to support each other and learn from each other.

Ann

After reading Assurban and Tim's posts, I do agree. I realize that people should be treated with a level of respect and dignity, and that these forums were intended for people living with HIV - the AM I INFECTED forum exists solely as a courtesy for those with queries.

I also understand that I will NEVER know the depths of crazy a person can sink into when a child of theirs is concerned. I am not a parent. Not of humans, anyhow... and I know the depths of crazy which I have explored when one of my pets grows ill or dies.

I think it is imperative that, at the very least, each of us understands the virus that runs through our body. Understands how it got there, how it gets to other people, what it does. I am often aggravated when people do not do this, and I have become a little thin-skinned when it comes to offerin support to those who have not achieved that measure.

It is not nice of me, it is not charitable, and it is neither kind nor supportive.

I also agree with the assessment of the sticky thread. Rarely do people read them. AM I is proof of that. I just often search the universe for a way to make information not only available, but mandatory. Such a thing is not possible, I think.

I will try to temper myself in the support forums, and exercise the patience that has, on many occasions, been shown to me when I have had a lapse.

Title: Re: The new sticking vegetables and dildos up ya arse thread
Post by: mecch on September 23, 2010, 12:33:27 pm
this is way sexier

(http://i1007.photobucket.com/albums/af197/bedstuy65/HairyArmpit.jpg)

Red neck my ass.  Isn't that Kate Millet? Oxford graduate, Columbia PhD, proto-dyke butch granola hippy mega feminist, who haunted my childhood dreams after startling in the flesh sightings in post hippy hot spots around the Hudson Valley, circa 1976.

Title: Re: The new sticking vegetables and dildos up ya arse thread
Post by: denb45 on September 23, 2010, 12:41:38 pm
Red neck my ass.  Isn't that Kate Millet? Oxford graduate, Columbia PhD, proto-dyke butch granola hippy mega feminist, who haunted my childhood dreams after startling in the flesh sightings in post hippy hot spots around the Hudson Valley, circa 1976.



No it's really what Miss P actually looks like  ;D  I'd tap that  :-*
Title: Re: The new sticking vegetables and dildos up ya arse thread
Post by: Assurbanipal on September 23, 2010, 02:47:16 pm
After reading Assurban and Tim's posts, I do agree. I realize that people should be treated with a level of respect and dignity, and that these forums were intended for people living with HIV - the AM I INFECTED forum exists solely as a courtesy for those with queries.

I also understand that I will NEVER know the depths of crazy a person can sink into when a child of theirs is concerned. I am not a parent. Not of humans, anyhow... and I know the depths of crazy which I have explored when one of my pets grows ill or dies.

I think it is imperative that, at the very least, each of us understands the virus that runs through our body. Understands how it got there, how it gets to other people, what it does. I am often aggravated when people do not do this, and I have become a little thin-skinned when it comes to offerin support to those who have not achieved that measure.

It is not nice of me, it is not charitable, and it is neither kind nor supportive.

I also agree with the assessment of the sticky thread. Rarely do people read them. AM I is proof of that. I just often search the universe for a way to make information not only available, but mandatory. Such a thing is not possible, I think.

I will try to temper myself in the support forums, and exercise the patience that has, on many occasions, been shown to me when I have had a lapse.



I've reread my post and want to apologize for the tone.  Because I've had trouble reconciling my own emotional reactions to my intellectual understanding, I could really identify with dingowarrior.  (As Tim pointed out, when children are involved, there's an added emotional dimension.)  That made me a bit abrupt in my post to you and I'm sorry.

I do think we should continue a discussion about how to support people becoming informed and internalizing  that information -- but maybe with a "reset" on the name and the emotions around it.  I started a thread in Living With on the topic.
Title: Re: The new sticking vegetables and dildos up ya arse thread
Post by: Hellraiser on September 24, 2010, 12:23:45 am
Red neck my ass.  Isn't that Kate Millet? Oxford graduate, Columbia PhD, proto-dyke butch granola hippy mega feminist, who haunted my childhood dreams after startling in the flesh sightings in post hippy hot spots around the Hudson Valley, circa 1976.



MISOGYNIST!!!

Hey everyone else is throwing it around, I just wanted to get in on the action.
Title: Re: The new sticking vegetables and dildos up ya arse thread
Post by: jkinatl2 on September 24, 2010, 12:53:56 am
I've reread my post and want to apologize for the tone.  Because I've had trouble reconciling my own emotional reactions to my intellectual understanding, I could really identify with dingowarrior.  (As Tim pointed out, when children are involved, there's an added emotional dimension.)  That made me a bit abrupt in my post to you and I'm sorry.

I do think we should continue a discussion about how to support people becoming informed and internalizing  that information -- but maybe with a "reset" on the name and the emotions around it.  I started a thread in Living With on the topic.

Of course forgiven. I myself have been more cranky than usual as of late. Been going through some awesomely wretched stuff as of late, and it's really affecting me more than I care to admit. We never know the person behind the keyboard, or what his/her story is except what we are told.  I don't share much on here, because I am not here all the time.

I hope you got some good ideas from the thread that you started.

Title: Re: The new sticking vegetables and dildos up ya arse thread
Post by: Ann on September 24, 2010, 01:16:25 am
MISOGYNIST!!!

Hey everyone else is throwing it around, I just wanted to get in on the action.

Hellraiser, do you ever THINK before you blurt stuff out? You must be really fun in tricky social situations.

Yes, other people have been name calling lately. One got a seven day time out and the other two got warnings.

Now I'm warning you. We don't allow name calling here. And don't come back to say you were only trying to be funny. You're not funny.

Consider yourself warned.

Ann
Title: Re: The new sticking vegetables and dildos up ya arse thread
Post by: mecch on September 24, 2010, 04:57:32 am
Oops i forgot the emoticon and tricked Hellraiser into that!  Sorry!  I loved Kate Millet as a kid, AND she had all those kinda scarey (to my little brain at the time) traits / stereotypes I labeled her with.  Sorry to you Hell and sorry to all the superstar feminists.  ;D