Ladies Thread part 1. 2009 "HAPPY NEW YEAR, YOU ALL ARE SO DEAR'

[netta]

 Happy New Year. Hope everyone is doing well .We have alot to be thankful for ladies.
Even through the sickness and pain, sunshine and rain, we made it to 2009!!!!

[vivyt]

Thank you Netta. You are so uplifting and positive. Whenever I get down and wonder why I'm here I remind myself that I God has a purpose for me otherwise I would have been gone a long time ago. I don't know what it is yet but I know there's a reason...

I just want to take a moment and thank all of you ladies for just being here. It is because of you that I have hope. There is a whole other side to this and you all have enlightened me. For whatever reason we have all been brought together and I am thankful for that.

Have a wonderful evening everyone. I have to go to bed at a decent hour...it's a school night, LOL!

[BT65]

Netta, thanks for starting the new thread.  Great title also. 

Andrea, I hope you have a wonderful day tomorrow at school.

Just wanted to say that.  I'm going to go read a new book I got in Arizona at the Heard Museum (Native American museum).  It was written by Indian women, all about life.  Have a good night ladies.

[Veritee]

Yes I hope everyone has a wonderful and healthy 2009

[cjc]

Happy New Year , ladies.  Hope everyone is doing well. We are okay, just going through a few minor changes, nothing that can't be dealt with. Life is good, we are good and hope you all are too.   Cristy

[vivyt]

Ugghhh....back to school! Although, truth be told, I am looking forward to seeing the kids.  I'm also going to attempt to get my growing booty into the gym today. Yeah, we shall see.

Have a great day ladies!

[BT65]

Morning ladies,

Veritee, happy new year to you as well.

Cristy, good to hear from you!  I wish you'd drop in more often.  You still have my phone number?

Andrea, happy back to school.  I think I mentioned awhile back, I got a $15/month scholarship to the local Y here, and I've yet to use it.  Good luck with your gymn quest.

Today is just another day.  My first class is this Wednesday night.  It's entitled "The Family," (it's a psych class).  The other one I'm taking this 8 weeks is "Biology."  I don't like science classes, but it's required.  The 2nd eight weeks, I'm taking "Counseling," "Anatomy and Physiology," and "Weather and Climate," (last one being of course a science elective).  Also, the weather course is online, which makes me nervous, as I've never taken an online course before.  The secretary told me she'd help me though. 

My landlord will be here in a couple hours to collect rent.  The people who live in the front apartment (they're really white trash, there I've said it), have a dog.  The landlord told the girl she can't have one there permanently.  Apparently she told the landlord the dog only goes there on visits.  Well, that's not true.  And every time they leave, the dog howls and barks.  It's not the fact that they have a dog that pisses me off.  The thing that gets me is that I paid over a hundred dollar pet deposit so I could have my cat.  I know they haven't paid a dime, and it's not fair that they get to have a pet for $0.  I'm going to mention that to my landlord today.  And I can't imagine they're taking care of the poor thing.  Every time they take their car out (it's a girl, her sister and their kids), they have to put transmission fluid in  and radiator fluid, and they leave the containers right in front of their car for someone else to dispose of.  That's not even healthy for the squirrels, any other animal wandering by etc.  But, like I said, they're white trash.

Anyway, that's my rant for today (or at least for now).  You ladies have a good day.

[cjc]

Thanks Betty. I have been really slack with my posting. I'm sure I still have your # , I just have to find it.                                                             Things are going well. Robert is good except he keeps bringing virus's home from school and I keep catching them. Lost my job cause I was sick on Thanksgiving and called out. They really needed me but I had a fever and chills, it was nasty. I couldn't see going in like that. Oh well, I will find another job and I was probably pushing it with the double shifts anyway. Waiting to file taxes so I can get another car. Stopped talking to that guy in SC, he wanted  to come get me and take me to his house so we could get busy but I was not comfortable with that cause I would have had to take Robert and I don't think so... And he completely ignored why I said I was uncomfortable with that.     Anyway, things could be worse and I am a survivor, this too  shall pass. Hope all you ladies are good, Queen, Moonlight, Wendy,Netta, Viv, anyone I might have forgotten . I will try to check in more often.    Later.   Cristy     

[Veritee]

Good title netta!! Hi Cristy, I cross posted sorry.

And how awlful to lose your job because you got sick, It is one of the reasons I have not tired to get a paid job again as yet as I am scared of geting ill again and letting my work down, as I seem to catch everythign theses days, just had flu, and do not recover quickly like I used to. I hope you feel better soon, perhaps when the weather is warmer we all will.

Good luck to all who are going back to school , either for classes or to teach. I find in a way I miss going back to teach.

I do not work professionally now only voluntarily and I only do one class myself just for recreation.

I do a free creative textiles/print class, it is only one day a week on thursdays and I am doing it for fun and also as it is my wish to get a body of art work together to add to my photography and digital art work and eventually to go to the local Art School  - Falmouth Art College which is only down the road from me - to finish something I started many years ago when I went to art school as a young person - - many years ago - and eventually get an MA in art

Its very cold here.
I know its nothing like as cold as where some of you live but it is, for here, bitterly cold today - it is -5 centigrade and getting colder, how cold does it get where you all live, is - 5 cold to you?

The news on the TV keeps going on about how tonight will be the coldest night of the year in England - and the coldest for many years in the UK and right now it certainly feels like it.

 As even living in the warmest part of the UK my heating is today hardly keeping my house warm at all, I am in thick clothes and the boiler is on overdrive and making funny rattling noises as if it can't believe that it is actually having to do some real work for a change to keep the house warm!
We have had the same boiler for over 18 years and I do not think it has ever worked so hard.

I do not feel like going out in this weather, but have really been to stationary recently so like you vivyt I will have to go back to the gym - have not been for months!

Perhaps with the cold I will get the snow I miss here after all. My husband and I have a £10 bet together about if it will snow here in the next few days!! Wish me luck I say it will and he says it won't!

[keepingfaith]

 Hey Ladies,

How is everyone doing. I just got my labs back from the one I took in December, My CD4 is 501 it has went down from 535. I guess it's from the lack of sleep and the stress I was going through plus I had an bad sinus infection. We're back at work today. I had gotten to the point I was liking being off and being able to sleep in late. I am also waiting to file my taxes. I need to pay off some major bills. I won't have anything left out of my taxes to spoil myself with. But in March I should be getting a school check.

Betty- We have a new puppy. It's a Shih Tzu. He is 7 weeks old. He is so adorable.

CJC- Long time no hear from you. Sorry about you losing your job. What kind of work did you do?

Veritee- How is everything going with your daughter?

Viv- those was my thought about going to work today to. (UUUUGGGHHHH) I work with children also. But I love them so.

To all my other ladies, I hope all is good.

Later..


Latrice.

[BT65]

Cristy, sorry about your job.  But working double shifts was a bit much.  Sorry about the SC guy also.  I'm glad you stuck to your guns though.  I'm sure things will work out.

Veritee, I don't know how to translate from celsius to farenheit, I only know farenheit temps.  Right now here it's actually 20F, so it's warmer than it has been.   I think it would be awesome for you to go back to school.

Latrice, now I have a name to put with your avvy.  I adore Shih Tzu's.  They are so cute.  Also, I'm sure that's why your CD4's dropped, if you were stressed and sick.  They should be better next time, provided you feel alright.

That's all I wanted to say.  Have a good evening.

[Snowangel]

Hi Everyone!
Netta- I love the title!

BT- I don't blame you for being pissed about the dog.  I hope that conversation went well with the landlord.

Keeping- Did you get your doggy for Christmas?  What color did you get? The 2 ankle biters we had were supposedly shi tzus, but I think they were terriers.  I just saw your text today, I am going to give you a call in the a.m.  How are you feeling?

Viv- I need to get my butt to the gym too. I was so happy that the kids had to go back to school today. I hope you had a good day.

cjc- Sorry to hear about your job. I have  been having the same problem with getting everything the kids bring home.  I was sick the whole vacation.  I need a vacation from the vacation.

Hi Veritee- Nice to see you back!  Congrats on your daughters new job!  I am not sure what degree that temp is either, it has been in the teens around here.  We had freezing rain last night, so we had a 2 hr school delay this morning but it warmed up to the 30's by the time the kids went to school.

I have trying to lay low because I have had a cold.  I still have a cough but not nearly as bad as it was. I sounded like a frog for a while which made the kids laugh.  My father took my oldest for a couple of days so that was nice.  I took the kids to Madagascar 2 at the beginning of the week(it was cute) and the 3some to a local childrens museum, other than we did nada.

Happy New Year to all you beautiful women. I wish everyone a happy and healthy year.

[vivyt]

Good evening ladies!

Betty- Those classes sound good. I took Biology and Physiology in high school. In college I took Environmental Science and Oceanography. I LOVE the life sciences. It was the Earth Sciences I hated. I am sure you will do fine with the online class. I have never taken an online course. I prefer the interaction with people, although it might be nice to "go to class" in your pajamas. Those people with the dog sound trashy. I can't stand irresponsible pet owners. I feel sorry for the dog. There are always people who have no regard for the rules.

Cristy-Sorry about your job. It is probably better anyway since they cannot even respect the fact that you were sick. That guy you talking about doesn't sound like someone you would want to get involved with.

Veritee- That sounds cold! When I was in junior high we learned a little rhyme to help correlate Fahrenheit and Centigrade--"30 is hot, 20 is pleasing, 10 is cold, and Zero is freezing" Kind of silly but it helps to get an idea. It is in the 60's here.

Keeping- Your count still sounds good. Isn't it amazing how before we never really thought about how stress and lack of sleep could effect out health but now we actually see the connection...well at least I do.

Snow- Hey there. I hope you feel better!

Today went well. The kids were happy and I was excited to see them. I swear everytime we have a break they grow. I have a few students who are taller than me. Unfortunately I did not make to the gym...oh well....I won't lose any sleep over it... LOL! Tomorrow...That's all for now. Talk to you tomorrow! 

[minismom]

Last October, our very good friend lost her husband.  He was 28yrs old and went in for a "routine" surgery to repair a small hole in his heart.  He went into sepsis, never woke up, and less than a week later, he was dead.  They had 6 children under 6yrs old (no multiples - all biological) and she was 7mths pregnant with baby #7. Christmas afternoon, she welcomed Caleb Daniel into their family.  She had mixed feelings because she and her husband had never discussed names and she felt almost guilty naming baby without his input.  But, baby is fine, mom is fine, siblings are fine, and she is working hard to make a life for them on her own.

I think about my friend.  I think about a member of the forum who just lost his mum. I think about the people who are alone. I think of those who's entire existences have been shaken from the foundations, and I wonder what it is that I really have to complain about.

You ladies have been a second family to me.  I have been able to be honest and feel safe.  I raise my glass to each one of you.  Our struggles are different, but in the struggling, we've found common ground. 

Here's to you.
Mum

[vivyt]

That was very well said Mum.


I did forget to add something funny to my previous post. The kids have been talking about their vacation and where they traveled to, movies they saw, etc. Well during math, the kids rotate for math so I have some of my own and some from the other 2 classes. One of the students from another class was telling me about how she had to watch her little brother and how he was so bad. I asked her what he did and she said he peed on the Christmas tree. I almost burst out laughing! I am sure her parents wouldn't want anyone to know this but kids have no filter. 

[cjc]

Good morning Ladies.                                                                                 Mum, that is very sad about the lady who lost her husband. I hope she and the children will be okay.                                                                        Snow, hope you get to feeling better. I catch every little thing that comes around even if Robert doesn't.   We think that we had a mild flu about 3 weeks ago, Me, mom and Robert were all very sick and the flu shots we received must have been for a different strain. The odd thing was I got better before the 2 of them.                                              Viv, I have always loved the tidbits you share about your students. Robert loves all his teachers and I do as well . They are so kind and he is learning at an almost frightening rate. The other day I wanted him to do something and he said"My balance is poor, so I can't do it"       I had to fight to keep a straight face , he was so serious.                     Veritee, That class sounds like fun .                                                   Betty, good luck with your classes, I am sure you will ace them all. That is messed up about the dog especially since you had to pay a pet deposit and they have not. You are right in saying something to your landlord, that's just not fair. Antifreeze, radiator fluid , is highly toxic to all animals and it tastes sweet so they will drink it, then they die, not quick and easy either.You should say something to the landlord about that , too.                                                       Keeping, what a beautiful  name you have .   I am waiting on my W-2 's so I can file my taxes as well. Then I will get another car. Yah!!!!   I was waiting tables, I love it and am good at it. I will find another job, just kinda irritated that they let me go. You can't serve food sick like that. I would have given it, whatever bug I had picked up to  a lot of our guests, not to mention the staff.                    Anyway, hope everyone has a good day. It's raining here so I will get the house cleaned  since I can't go outside. Later.   Cristy

[BT65]

Morning ladies,

Snow, my granddaughter wants to see "Madagascar 2" also.  I might take her to it this weekend, I'm not sure. 

Andrea, I love that story about the little boy who peed on the tree.  That's hilarious.

Mum, I am so sorry about your friend's husband.  What a young age.  I had sepsis when I went into a coma about, I don't know, 8 or 9 years ago.  I had a bladder infection, the antibiotics didn't work, and the poison went into my bloodstream.  I wasn't supposed to make it out of the hospital.  That's one reason I believe there's a God, because of all the times I've survived and there's been no medical/scientific explanation for it.

Cristy, I think it's terrible that they fired you for being sick.  I wouldn't want a waitress who was sick bringing me food.  I don't know why they don't understand that.

My talk with the landlord went well.  He said she'll be out by the end of March (the lady with the dog).  What she has is a 3 month old pitbull.  I think the only reason she got a pit is for status, having seen the type of people she hangs around (all slick talking gangsters).  I wouldn't trust her to raise that dog right.  It is sad that animals fall into irresponsible hands. 

I went to see "Doubt" yesterday.  If anyone hasn't seen it, I highly recommend it.  It was such an excellent movie.  Meryl Streep was just fabulous, as was Philip Seymour Hoffman.  I would see it again.

Today I don't have anything planned.  I'll probably read my book that is written by Indigenous women about life.  It's very interesting.  I hope all you ladies have a good day.

[minismom]

Betty, do you remember what the name of the book is?  If it's good, let me know, I'd love to read it.

My parents' dog spent the night with us Sunday night.  It's a Chinese Crested.  Those are the dogs that are hairless except for a tuft of hair on their heads and tails.  They look like Squiggy from Laverne and Shirley (am I dating myself?). Anyway, Ginger is a mutant Crested in that she has an enormous amount of hair.  She looks like a tiny Afghan.  She's 100% hypoallergenic and the only breed of dog that sweats.  Also, somehow, they don't produce dander of that "dog" smell.  She's cute, sweet, and does great with the kids.  We've talked about getting a dog, but it has to be hypoallergenic, small, short-haired, patient, non-whiny, and smart.  I'd prefer one that's a year or two old and housebroken.  I have a 5yr old still in diapers - if I can't potty train my kids, how could I potty train a dog?   I'd like a Bassett Hound, Pug, or a bulldog.  Her name will be Norma.

"Doubt" looked like a good movie.  I'm writing all of these down so I can look for them once they come out on DVD.  I took the kids to see Madagascar 2 and they liked it.  There was one part that I could've done without.  It was pretty raunchy.

No big plans for today.  #6 has speech therapy at 1 and #1 (son) and Mini have dance class tonight.  Hubby will do the running around today - I'm drained.

Andrea, that was funny about the tree.  When kids will share nothing else, they will gladly share germs and family secrets.

I hope you ladies have a wonderful Tuesday.
Mum

[netta]

Ladies  I have had the best New Years ever!!! . I have a new man in my life!!! My NEW man came to visit!,We went to church New Years Eve and then to breakfast. For the past six years I have been alone, since a divorce. I have dated a few times but nothing came of it. Now you all can
call me a hussy, ( cause I had navyman last month)  but that was just practice for the real thing,lol. Ok you all know I was pissed at navy man for drinking up my liquor and a few other things, like taking to his ex wife the whole time he was here. Anyhow.... I had been talking to someone else also.My new man James had a few days off work so he flew down to visit me for the new year and it was great! He wined and dined me loved on me real good!!!! I have  really enjoyed him and we just click, really click. Well we decided we are not getting any  younger, he's 47 and i will be 51. We dicided  to give this a try..We talked about a lot of things and he has decided to move here with me. Yes my prayers have been answered. I dont expect perfect and we both have baggage but this relationship is worth it! He is also poz and single, never been married! I have talked to his family and checked him out. One day navyman called  out of the blue, since i had not heard from him in a while.He called early in the morn, we were sleep, so i returned his call, about noon when we were up and about. This guy acted like he didn't know who I was,!!!! playing games ,i guess he had company. Any way i ask what he wanted and he said just to say hi and then said I know u have a man there (he was always accusing me in the past)and for the first time, I said yes and we are very happy.Hesaid he wished me the best and then we hung up. Only to have him call right back, this time James my new boo answered the phone and asked what he wanted, told him to stop playing games and lose the number! ok So thats the end of that!!!! My new man is hard working and in pretty good health, but he is a diabetic, so i must learn about this. He is back home and back to work, looking for a job down here. I am still in shock because you all know I had given up on having a good man in my life. Well life is full of suprises, we talk every day and he hopes to move down after income tax returns. I can truly say I am happy and though things are happening fast, it feel so right. keep us in your prayers!
Love to everyone!!!

[jennynyc7]

NETTA!!!! That sounds so awesome. I am so happy for you. How far away does he live right now? I wish you the best of luck and I hope navyman leaves you alone once and for all!

[franfrog]

Netta,
great idea for a thread title.  I have to say I agree with you, hated holidays and birthdays and now I look forward to each and every one knowing that I have made it through it!
I wish everyone a great 2009!

[cjc]

 Netta , I am so happy for you.  That sounds wonderful. Hope you will both be very happy, you deserve it.  Cristy

[netta]

thanks all u well wishers. James lives in Stanford Conn. He told me today he is working as much overtime as possible due to the plant closing soon and laying off folks. He is a painter by trade, but working as a  mechanical operator for Clarol and Proctor and Gamble. At least he can collect while he looks for work down here in Georgia, He has contacts here so it shouldnt be too long.

[vivyt]

Cristy- I am sure you will find another job soon. You have such a positive attitude....love it!

Betty- I wanted to see that movie when I was on vacation. I think Philip Seymour is a wonderful actor. Did you ever see "The Talented Mr. Ripley"? His character was good. I am going to have to make a point to go see it. Good news about those people moving out.

Mum- I know exactly what kind of dog you are talking about. They are so ugly they're cute! LOL! I have always wanted a Pug. The only thing is they have breathing problems.

Netta- You must really have it going on! The men are drawn to you like bees to honey... Good for you! Everyone deserves to be happy and we should embrace the chance when we get it. I am happy for you

Nothing really to report today. I had my appointment with my therapist and I feel like I talked a mile a minute. We had a 2 week break over the holidays and you'd be amazed how much happens in that time. I am tired today and don't really want to do anything. My Vivian is so stinky and I really need to give her a bath but I am just too tired. She gets so dirty playing with all the other dogs. I think I'll make her wait till tomorrow.

That's all. Stay warm out there and have a good night!

[tendai]

Hi ladies. Happy New year!
My holidays were ok, visited my sister and her husband which was fine.  I was like "uh-oh" when i saw how sparkling clean her house is. She's kinda like Bree Vanderkamp from Desperate Housewives the way she's so smart and perfect.  I was terrified of dropping crumbs on the floor or messing up the chairbacks on the sofas. But it was nice I had a great time.  And Mr Out-of-town was in town for New years. so we had fun just watching movies mostly.
netta - congrats on the new boyfriend! im happy for you!
cristy - good luck finding a new job. im glad u and robert are doing ok
crap i gotta go boss just walked in

[BT65]

Morning ladies,

Mum, the name of the book is "Every Day is a Good Day," and it's by (yes, her real name) Wilma Mankiller.   I'd never heard of that breed of dog, the Chinese crested.  And I didn't know about the dog sweating.  That's intersting.  Pugs are adorable.  If I ever live in a house with a fenced yard and could afford it, I've always wanted a boxer. 

Netta, congratulations!  Good for you.  You certainly deserve some happiness with all that's happened in your life recently.

Jenny and Fran, nice to hear from you.

Andrea, I haven't seen my therapist for a couple weeks either and he's supposed to be here tomorrow.  Sometimes I don't have any pressing problems to talk about, and then we usually just shoot the breeze.  But you're right, a lot can happen in two weeks.  Good luck giving Vivian a bath.

Tendai, good to hear from you!  I'm glad you enjoyed your holidays. 

It really snowed out last night.  I got up, looked outside, and wished I was back in Phoenix.  A lady I was talking to this morning at the ASO here was telling me she'd like to move where it doesn't snow, and where it's not hot and humid.  I told her she wouldn't like the South, as I remember when I lived in Alabama it got extremely hot and humid in the summer.  She said she had a friend who lived in Phoenix who was saying how much easier the heat there is to take because of it being dry.  But, I do know my sister talks about there being a monsoon season out there, where I guess it rains and gets a bit humid.  Like I said before, every place has it pluses and minuses.  But this snow and grayness gets old after awhile.  I like it when the sun's out.

Alright, there's my bitching for the day (though I'll probably think of something else later).  Classes start tonight.  I have "The Family," which is a psych class.  I'm glad, 'cause I'm getting tired of being inside.  I was going to go to the store today also, but not sure yet; I'll wait to see if they clear the roads anymore or not.  You ladies have a good day.

[netta]

hello, good to here from u tendai.
cristy- good luck finding a job
betty- sending some sunshine ur way!!!!
hope all is well.

[wishful]

Hello ladies..Hope all is well with everyone...

Go Netta..Go Netta GO GO Go GO..lol...Enjoy Sweety , you definitely deserve it.

Gotta a lil bit of baby daddy drama...ill share about later...(nothing bad ..not to ME anyways..lol)

Hope everyones holiday was well...As for me I gots me some BLING...not a ring...but some earrings , with the watch n necklace to match.....for XMas..among a few other gifts from yungin....i only mentioned the bling bcus its the first time a man has given me nice, real (lol) jewelry ..EVER..So that was exciting....im glad its over and Im ready to start planning the babies bday party in March...
Well just a few lines..let u know im still kickin and KRAZEE as Ever...so Ciao for now My Sweeties..............
J

[BT65]

Morning ladies,

Netta, where is that sunshine, I don't see it?

Jamie, good to hear from you!  I'm anxious to hear about the "baby daddy drama."

I wonder what Drag has been up to.  She used to check in every day; how long has it been?  Queen hasn't been around lately either, or Cin.  Deep-freeze?

It's another gray day here.  We got more snow and are supposed to get more today.  I can't believe there's going to be three more months of this.  I hope it goes by fast and spring gets here.

Last night's class was pretty good, for the first class.  We got out early (since it was the 1st one).  We have to make a "professional" family tree, and that's going to be a bit difficult for me, depending on how far back the professor wants us to go.  The only grandparent I knew was my mum's mum, the other three were dead by the time I was born, and my parents never talked about them much, so I don't know anything about them.  The one thing that may be interesting is that I have some letters my father wrote his mum during WWII when he was in Germany.  They're in a sealed envelope right now.  I have no clue how to do a good family tree.  Last night in class, we were given some time to try to make an "example" one on a piece of paper, and mine looked like a mess.  The saving grace was that pretty much everyone else's did also.  It's not as easy as it sounds.

Today my therapist comes over (I think), then tonight is another new class.  I got a letter yesterday from the president of the university about making the president's list (yipee).  I hope you ladies have a good day.

[cjc]

 Good morning Ladies.                    Betty, that is just fantastic about making the president's list. I am thinking that is like honor roll. Can't add much about the family tree, I am sure that you will do your best and apparently your best is really good so don't stress it too much.                          Not much going on here, yesterday I went to DSS to try to get our foodstamps increased and sign up for WorkFirst. Foodstamps are taken care of, the lady that does it is a bit bitchy but I am still polite to her even though I don't want to be. The WorkFirst, they can keep that. They want me to work(for free) at a "work experience site " for 35 hours per week. I only worked 20 to 30, at most, hours per week before so I'm not doing it.  The check would have been for $236 per MONTH. I think I will just beg nicely and see if my dad will let me use a vehicle to find a job. Sorry, I just had to vent about that for a minute .                            On a worse note, I am getting either Strep throat or Thrush. I called my doctor's office and we decided that my CD4"s(570) are not low enough for thrush so I must be getting Strep. She told me to gargle with salt water and if it doesn't clear by Monday then I need to come in. She would have had me come in today but I told her I have nothing to drive. There is a truck here I could use for emergency's but  last time I drove it to Greensboro, the alternator belt broke and we had to get AAA to tow it home. I have been gargling so maybe that will help.I hope Robert doesn't get it. I let him drink some of my koolaid Tuesday.                                                   Getting the upstairs vacuumed today and cleaning. No snow here but it is cold and windy. Got the house to myself today and that's nice. Hope everyone has a great day. Later.   Cristy

[vivyt]

Hey everyone.

Betty- Congratulations making the President's List. You go!!!

Cristy- I had no idea you could get thrush with CD4's in the 500's. I had thrush but my count was in the double digits. I hope the salt water cures it.

Wish- Jewelry is always fun to get...

I don't have much going on. I am TIRED!!! I am glad tomorrow is Friday. Nothing else to say... I may go to bed early. Talk to you all later!

[MOONLIGHT1114]

Hi GFs~

Haven't read a darn thing here, can barely keep my eyes open.  I will try to catch up this weekend. 

I wanted to wish Queen a Happy Birthday on January 12th.  I think its a BIG ONE!

More soon!

~ Cindy

[Queen Tokelove]

Morning Ladies---

Sorry I haven't checked in lately. It seems I have missed a great deal. Glad you're back home, Betty. I know your kitty missed you. Christy, good to see you. I was wondering what was going on with you. Sorry about losing your job. I know how that is, I use to work for a Hilton hotel and I use to feel for the banquet servers. Plus I had done a little serving before I went over to the PBX department. Just another name for the hotel operator. Man, I loved that job.

Netta, Girl you got to gimme your secret to finding poz guys. I can't seem to find any here and I know they're here somewhere... Grats on the new man. I thought the story was funny with the Navy man. That's what Katt Williams calls Bitch Ass Dudes.

Not much going on with me. I have to go to the ENT today because either I lost all my hearing in my right ear or something is wrong with my hearing aid. My landlord also has an inspection today for the house because he is trying to sell it. But my house is clean anyways. I probably need to go out and shovel before he gets here since it snowed last night. I am also braiding my hair so that has been tedious but I am almost done. I may finish it up later.

Yep, it's the countdown til my bday. Good looking, Cindy. I'll be 40...*sighs* Though Wishful reminded me that 40 is the new 30. Somebody needs to tell my body that... Gotta bounce, will check in later.

[minismom]

HAPPY BIRTHDAY QUEEN!!!  You and my dad have the same birthday - but you are much younger   My birthday is exactly 3wks after your's. 

#6 goes to the ENT (with Mini tagging along) on Tuesday to recheck her hearing.  It's gone in the right ear and we're wondering if it's going in her left.  Then, on Wed, she gets her eyes checked for the same reason.  Vision in her right eye is gone and her field of vision is narrowing in her left.  My poor baby.

Other than that, not much going on.  We had 3 inches of snow yesterday and the kids had a blast sledding down the hills.  It wore Mini out - she was sound asleep before 8pm (and awake before 6am).  Her Crankiness will show up, I'm sure, by the afternoon.  Today is her 1st day off this round of antibiotics.  We'll see how she does and pray that she's done with the infections.  Still haven't heard from PID - even after telling her nurse that we need a prescription for Kaletra so we can fill it in Feb.

I guess we'd better start school.  I want to finish early so we can head out to Walmart before it gets crowded.  Have a wonderful weekend!

Mum

[BT65]

Morning ladies,

Cristy, I hope your throat gets better.  You can tell if it's thrush by looking at your tongue and/or back of your throat.  Do you see any white like "patches?"  I've gotten thrush with a CD4 count over 500, but I can't remember why.  Anyway, I hope you get to feeling better.  Strep is no fun either.

Andrea, happy Friday!

Queen, I hope the problem with your hearing in your right ear is the hearing aid and that it can be fixed right away.  That's got to be so frustrating. 

Mum, good luck at the ENT.  Are you going to ask about the tubes for Mini?  Please let us know how it goes.  I would keep bugging that PID.  I hate it when docs don't get back to you.  I e-mail mine when I have a problem that I think can be fixed without going in.  And I'm fortunate, 'cause he usually gets back to me within 4-5 hours.

Last night's class was Biology.  It's going to be hard, at least for me (and my friends who haven't been in high school in years).  It was four hours, with only one 15 minute break.  It's interesting, just hard to understand and follow along at the pace the teacher is going.  There's a guy in the class who's a cop who acts like a smart-ass.  There was another guy who already graduated who's a cop, but he was very nice.  This guy thinks he's smarter than everybody and snickers when someone answers and he doesn't agree with them (typical cop around here).  But whatever.  So, this weekend I'm not going to be lacking for things to do.  I have tons of homework from this class and the other one.  That's alright, keeps me busy.

Today I might start on the homework.  Other than that, I have no real plans.  I might call my sister in Arizona and see how she's doing.  I wish she would send up some of their weather; it's supposed to snow a great deal here between tonight and tomorrow.  I saw on the news this morning that the area my daughter's in in Washington (south of Seattle) is having terrible flooding.  So, I'm going to call her later also and make sure she's alright.  Have a good day ladies.

[cjc]

Hello Ladies.       Happy early Birthday, Queen. Hope that something is just wrong with your hearing aid and not your ear. I'd like to have Netta's secret as well. I know there are poz men around here, I just can't find them. Oh well, they just don't know what they are missing.                                                                              Betty, I think that it is strep. I have been gargling with salt water and a couple drops of iodine and have had a great improvement. It feels so much better. I hope your daughter is okay.                                          Mum, hope  that #6 is okay. You take such good care of your kids. Hope that Mini's ears clear up.                                                               We are good, not much happening, just getting the grocery list together for Sunday and cleaning the house. Robert has gone down in the field with my dad, he will follow Grandpa anywhere and be happy doing it. Got a letter from my oldest today. He is doing okay and I write him at least once a week.       Have a great night ladies.      Cristy       Edited to add: I put a picture back up on yhe personals and here come the scammers . Maybe I'll find a good one.  Here it is . And here is a recent one of my little man

[attachment deleted by admin]

[BT65]

That's a beautiful pic of you Cristy, and what an adorable guy Robert is!

[minismom]

BT, I've decided that Mim's PID is a royal pain in the butt and I have no idea what her issue is.  If I could change, I would, without hesitation.  Because her doc is an ID doc, we're trying to find a peds HIV-specialist out of state to take her to.  Insurance will not pay for us to see a doctor out of state unless there isn't a specialty in the state, or if going out of state is closer than going in-state.  Since I'd have to pass right by Doc on our way to PA, they won't pay.  BUT, we're trying to get around it by saying we have no HIV-specialist here, only an ID doc whose specialty is actually Cystic Fibrosis. 

At first, I was only going to talk to the ENT about Mim and see if he wanted to see her.  But, I called and he agreed to see Mim the same time he sees #6.  Even if he decides to hold off on tubes, at least I have her latest health issues, meds she took, ect, in her file (you wouldn't believe how thick it is!).  I'll probably go ahead and have her labs done while we're there.  Then, I'll call and leave yet another message for Doc telling her we had them done early and if she wants to know why, she can look in her file.  I WISH we could e-mail, but we can't.

Christy, great picture of you and Robert.  I can't believe how much he's grown!  He's the same age as one of my kids, I think - birthdays around the same time (maybe March?)  I'm glad you guys are doing well.

Yes, it's very early.  I've not slept well the last couple of nights.  My nose is stuffy, but runny.  It drains right into my poor lungs and I can't breathe.  It's not as bad as last time and seems to come and go.  I've decided that "not breathing" is my new lifestyle. 

Hope everyone is having a great Saturday!
Mum

[apple]

Just want to wish the ladies here a happy new year and many blessings as well. I had not been active in 2008 but intends to pop in and out this year.
 
It is indeed by God's Grace that all of us were able to enter 2009. Let us try to live healthily in this year and think positively.

All the best to all of you............keep on smiling

[BT65]

Morning ladies,

Cristy, I'm glad your throat is feeling better. 

Mum, I hope you can get a nap sometime today.  5 in the morning is way too early to be up.  And, I wish you luck on finding another ID doc for Mini.  When is the appointment with the ENT?

Apple, it would be cool if you joined us here more often so we could get to know you.

Well, we have officially had our first winter storm of the season.  We got 8 inches of snow between yesterday afternoon and this morning, with another possible four inches on the way.  I never know if my landlord is going to snowblow, or if I should shovel.  So far, he's been snowblowing, but of course, this is a Saturday and he may not want to do anything on the weekened.  I'm debating on whether or not to go shovel.  Hell, I just got up only an hour ago.  I still have not adjusted fully to the two hour time difference from when I was in Arizona (or I'm just lazy).

I did some homework yesterday and managed to get a couple things done.  I still have more to go.  It's going to kick my ass this term.  I hope I can keep up with everything and pass everything.   So, that's what I'm going to be doing today-shoveling and homework.  I'm sure not going anywhere (I don't even know if I could get out).  I hope you ladies have a good day.

[vivyt]

Cristy- Nice pictures 

Mum- I hope it all works out for you and Mini. I also hope YOU get better.

Betty- It sounds like this might be your most difficult term. I don't think it will be a problem. Your smart and hardworking. I just can't get my mind around shoveling snow. YUCK!

Apple- Nice to meet you. I look forward to getting to know you.

I did some laundry this morning and graded some papers. I'm thinking about going to Target. I somehow always seem to find something. That's all....have a good day my cyber-friends!!!!!

[minismom]

Betty, I'm a big air-head.  #6 has her eye appointment on Tuesday at 12:45pm, and the ENT for both of them is Wednesday at 10:15am.  I didn't get a nap because the kids had friends over today.  They are friends from our homeschool group and you talk about POLITE!  They were wonderful and played really well together.  Hubby is about to take them home and bring all the kids.  It's about an hour round trip, so I'll take my nap when they leave.

We had snow on Thursday, but it all melted by Friday afternoon.  There was a chance of ice storms today, but it was only rain.  30% chance of stuff for the next week with highs in the low teens.  I bought a new book, so I'm happy not going anywhere.

Andrea, lol...laundry and grading papers - the thing Saturdays are made of.  I've decided that I should've been a fish - can't breathe air, should try my hand at water

Hope everyone is enjoying their Saturday.
Mum

[BT65]

Morning ladies,

Andrea, I like Target.  I like their baked good and some things in their deli.

Mum, it sounds like the kids had a good time.  At least the kid that came over weren't heathens. 

Another one who hasn't posted in awhile is Wendy.  I hope everyone's alright. 

We got another, oh, about 2 inches of snow on top of the 8 we already had.  By the middle of the week, the temps are supposed to drop to the single digits, about 5F degrees, with it being below zero at night.  This is the worst winter we've had in quite awhile.  It would be nice if it were going to be over by the end of next month, but we've got two and 1/2 more months of this shit, at least.

I got all my homework done between Friday and yesterday.  There was a hell of a lot. Andrea mentioned this might be my toughest semester.  Well, toughest so far, with the exception of that awful Microeconomics class I had to take.  My Biology teacher has taught biology for over 40 years, and teaches in a nearby area's high school in their honor's program.  What he has to realize, is that we're not high school students who learn at a fast rate.  I think he will if all of us students are on the same page about things.  Next eight weeks is Anatomy & Physiology.  I don't know how hard that's going to be, so I'm waiting until the next eight weeks is over to judge which was the hardest term.

Today all I have to do is take garbage out, vaccuum, and eat.   I have the ingredients to make three more batches of fudge, which I might do today.  When I originally shopped for the stuff to make fudge, I got enough to make double batches.  I wouldn't know what to do with the ingredients if I didn't make it.  Last night I was craving some.  So, that's going to be my day.  My brother is supposed to come over tonight so we can watch more of The Wire. You ladies have a good day.

[Queen Tokelove]

Checking in with you ladies....I finally finished my hair yesterday. I would've been done sooner if I had not had a fever on Thursday. Not sure what the deal is with that or the dizziness I have been experiencing lately. I went to the ENT on Friday. It seems there was something wrong with the hearing aid so it got shipped off to get fixed. It was under warranty but last year this time both my hearing aids went out on me. Back then neither was under warranty but Ed, the audiologist got them fixed. My insurance company was suppose to cover them. When I say Ed, he said they denied the bill. Now I was told they were suppose to cover up the $1500 towards hearing aids. The bill was only $530. So, I am going to have to give them a call.

I haven't been doing much but sleeping. This time going to bed around 9 ish and sleeping til about 4 am. Then I am up the rest of the day. What the hell is going on? I sure as hell don't know. Maybe my biological clock is changing. Since I am going to be 40 tomorrow. My friend Jeff took me out to dinner on Friday for my birthday. We went to this nice Chinese restuarant. I watched him put away 2 plates and 2 bowls of food. While I barely could finish my plate but then I wasn't blazed either so I didn't have much of an appetite. Has also been having a good time on MySpace. I forget who started that thread but good looking out. I actually met someone from there earlier today. I don't know what made me decide to be so bold. But it actually was nice, very nice. And Sexy is still around too..Yeah, i couldn't walk away. So this bound to get interesting to say the least. Stay tuned.....

[vivyt]

Queen-LOL!  Your sleep pattern is my daily routine. The only difference is I get up at 5:00am.

Betty- I go to Target all the time. I'm always finding things there. A new one just opened down the street from my house. The only problem I have is that I am somewhat of an impulse shopper. I buy things and then when I get home I think about it and realize I don't really need it.

Let's see...I did more laundry today and watched some shoes that I DVR'ed. My mom gave me a pair of Ed Hardy shoes and I have been trying to exchange them for the right size since the day after Christmas and they still don't have them. My sister got the shoes too, (in a different color) and some boots and she had to go to another mall. I am going to have to do that. It's irritating when you want to wear something and you can't. Of course it is probably a good thing since you know I would have to buy an outfit to wear with them...

I am going to start some lesson planning. I only have to do Language Arts but I always put it off. That's all for now!

[Winiroo]

I'm here. Just dealing with some personal issues. I am ok.

[minismom]

Happy Birthday Queen!!!!

Andrea, you reminded me of something I forgot to do...lol.  Need to make a geography test for #1.  You aren't the only one who puts stuff off.

Queen, my sleep has been messed up for years.  Last night, I fell asleep before 7pm, woke up about 7:30, then back to sleep about 10, woke up just after 6am.  Sunday morning, I was up about 5, and Saturday morning saw me kissing the day at 4am.  If we lived closer, we could go for coffee and be back home before anyone knew we were gone.  I tried Melatonin, but it just kept me awake all night.

Betty, I think the last semester is hardest for 2 reasons: First, you can see the end and it can't get here soon enough. Second, they save the toughest subjects for the end.  You've made it this far, you'll make it to May - with you cap and gown.  I can't wait!

Wendy, hope things start looking up for you.

Here's to a great Monday!
Mum

[Queen Tokelove]

Happy Birthday to me.... I'm not doing anything special, that was on Friday with the dinner. My MySpace buddy wants to come over later to spend time with me for my birthday. So, that may happen. At the moment I am waiting on my friend Jeff to get motivated and swing by to get me. He's taking me to the grocery store to grab something for dinner. I am in the mood for tacos... Then tomorrow we will do our heavy duty shopping. I swear gay men are great friends. I love him to death. Funny though because we first met because we were neighbors. And we didn't even like each now look at us. He's poz too and I think this virus has made us closer. Ironic isn't it?

That's about it for me. Wini, just remember with whatever it is you are going through..it too shall pass. Take it from someone who knows. I hope you feel better soon.

[cjc]

Happy Birthday Queen. I hope you have a great one.  Taco's sound good, I did my big grocery shopping yesterday and got some taco mix..                                                                                                 Not much going on, Robert at school, the parents gone to the other house to do some work so I have the house to myself for a few hours.  I will get some cleaning done but only inside, the temperature is below 40, too cold for me. Thank you for the compliments about the pictures, ladies. I just felt like posting them.   Gotta go, the dryer is calling me. Hope everyone has a great day.   Cristy

[BT65]

Morning ladies,

HAPPY BIRTHDAY QUEEN!  Turning 40 is a big deal (I think).  And you're right, gay men are great friends.   My best gay friend is the one who took care of my kitty when I was in Phoenix.  I hope you have a good time today, with whatever you decide to do.

Andrea, I'm just getting over being an impulse shopper.  It's hard not to buy something when I think I "need" it.  Unless, of course, I don't have any money. I just ask myself if I truly need what it is I want.  If I don't, then I'm having an easier time passing it up. 

Wendy, I hope times get easier.  What Queen said it true, hard times pass.  It doesn't seem like they will when we're going through them.  And it always takes so damn long.  We're here for ya.

Cristy, you certainly wouldn't like it in Indiana if below 40 is too cold for you.  By Wednesday, we're suppsoed to be down to 8F degrees.  Unbelievable, isn't it.

Yes, 8F degrees ladies.  Ugh.  I don't remember it being that cold in years.  It seems we're getting an arctic blast from Canada.  This has been the worst winter in as far back as I can remember.  Isn't there some saying about bad winters making good summers? 

I have to do laundry today.  I really don't want to, but I don't want to run out of underwear either.  I'm going to have to wade through about 4 inches of snow to get to my car to go do it.  And my body chemistry is switching with yours, Queen.  I've now started getting up no earlier than 9:30 a.m., where I used to be up by 7:30 a.m.  Today I didn't get up until 10:30 a.m.  I don't know what's going on.  Ever since I went to Phoenix.  It would seem that I would be used to the two hour time difference by now.  I guess I'm going to have to make myself get up earlier one morning, maybe that'll help. 

Did anyone watch the Golden Globes?  Slumdog Millionaire won for best picture.  Of course, I don't put as much importance on the Globes as the Oscars, but I was happy.  It was a great picture.  If anyone hasn't seen it, I highly suggest it.         You ladies have a good day.

[keepingfaith]

HAPPY BIRTHDAY QUEEN!!!!!!!!! I called you last night but I didn't get an answer so I left you a voicemail.



Nothing much really happening my way. Just got on to say Happy birthday to queen. I'm still at work so I will have to check back in later!

[Winiroo]

Michelle

[vivyt]

Happy Birthday Queen!

[Queen Tokelove]

Thanks for the birthday wishes. It actually turned out nice, the best birthday  I've had in a long time. My friend came over and spent some time with me. He seems so sweet. Sexy had wanted to get with me too but I was just having too good a time with my friend. Trying to think of a good name for him....

My sister has also chilled out, been spending a little time with her too. She actually had given me money for my bday along with a sexy teddy. She knows I love lingerie. Another friend of mine stopped over and bought me a pentacle necklace, it is nice. Now I have three. I'm going to have to find a silver pentacle ring to match the necklaces. I already have earrings. So, I truly had a good birthday and feel blessed.

I am waiting on my friend Jeff to call me to tell me when he is ready to go to the store. I was suppose to get labs done today but I ate. SO now I have to do it on another day. I think I am going to try to get a cat nap in before he calls. I'll check back later.

[BT65]

Morning ladies,

Queen, I'm glad you had a good birthday and that you have a new man in your life.  You and Netta are going to have to tell me your secrets. 

Well, do you all believe where I live, we got 6 more inches of snow on top of the 8 we already had?!  Believe me, I could do without this.  I know, it's winter time in the north, so I should expect this.  I think it's that it's coming so fast, one event right after the other, that makes it so aggravating to me.  We have a winter storm warning until tonight, then tomorrow we have a blizzard warning that runs from  the afternoon tomorrow through the afternoon on Thursday.  And near to below 0F temps.  We're getting some system from Canada.  I wish I had the weather I did when I was in Phoenix.  I am definitely not a snow bunny.

My caseworker (Medicaid, food stamp) was supposed to call 1/2 an hour ago for a redetermination interview, but she didn't.  She's like that though, but will still cut a person off in a heartbeat.  Maybe she didn't go into work because of the snow, but I didn't see any offices that had closed on the news this morning.  I'll call her this afternoon, since they don't take calls in the morning. 

Nothing else going on today.  I might try to make it to the store a little later.  You all have a good day.

[cjc]

Hello ladies. Hope everyone is well.   I am having a very good morning . I think it is because a little stress has been lifted. I got a letter Saturday from Social services and am getting a sizable increase in our foodstamps. I also called unemployment and finally got someone on the phone. They said I should expect a decision in the next week or so. The lady also said that my former employer did not send in a statement so I am thinking that my claim will be approved. Not a 100 % sure but looks promising. So those things are a relief. If the unemployment is approved, I can put gas in the truck(it drinks gas like I drink soda, slurpppp) and can start looking for another job. I can also buy Robert some new sweat pants, he is outgrowing the ones he has.All his school clothes are a size too big so he is good on those. He must change clothes as soon as he gets home so his good clothes will last longer.                                        Wow Betty, 6 more inches of snow. we haven't had any snow yet in NC but it's cold. Yes, I am a wimp(not ) and can't stand the cold. I go outside in coat, hat and gloves when it is cold. The temperature is going to drop down to 15 Thursday so I will put sweats over Robert's regular clothes to take him to the bus stop.  He doesn't care about the cold but I want him warm.                          Queen, glad you had a good birthday. Glad you have a new friend and that your sister has chilled a bit.  Makes life nicer.                                 Wendy, hang in there, things will get better.                                        Have a great day.    Cristy

[TreDai]

Happy New Year everyone!! Happy Belated Birthday Queen!!


I am ecstatic that everyone is well and beautiful!! May this year be Blessed!!

Well Since I last posted I have gotten married and now doing public speaking!! yea!!!!!
things are well over here . I have missed you ladies!!

One Love

[Winiroo]

I'm going to vent in this post.

After getting out of the shower last night I noticed pink spots all over my abdomen. First thought is SHIT I am getting shingles again. I've had them twice before so I know what it looks like and I know what the treatment is so I took a 1 gram tablet of Valcyclovir and went to bed. I took another this morning before going to work and the spots are nearly invisible now.
I went to my clinic and did a walk in because I felt it was a good idea to have it documented that I have shingles again.
The nurse practitioner that I hate came in and I explained the situation and showed her my belly which looks fine unless you examine very closely and know what you are looking for because I have already begun treatment trying to stop the leasions before they became painful. BTW I don't get to see a doctor unless I demand to. That's the way it works at my clinic.
Anyway she asked me what it felt like and I told her it was a crawly, tingly itchy feeling. She looked at me and said OH well that's not shingles, shingles burns. I told her I have had shingles before and if you let the blisters get big they do burn and hurt but before it gets to that point it is not painful.
She proceeded to contradict me again and I got pissed and yelled at her not to do that to me. Meaning not to treat me like I am an idiot. She apparently decided to believe me or not to fight this battle.

I was still mad. I've been mad at her since she suggested that my intestinal pain was in my head several months ago. So I told her that I did not want her to prescribe me any more antidepressants either because I am not and will not take them because I am not mentally altered and I am not clinically depressed. I told her I have been having anxiety attacks lately and that although my body is reacting to the attacks my mind is perfectly normal and rational at the times of the attacks.

Bitch wanted to argue with me.

So I began yelling at the woman. I almost never yell at strangers but this lady was trying to convince me that any sadness or depression I have is absolutely a chemical imbalance in my head and should be corrected with medication. I told her that any bad feelings I have are situational and to treat someone with medication for situational depression is stupid. That I do not need pills to make sadness go away. Things happen in everyones life. If your friend lies to you or you had a tough commute to work you feel bad sure but you don't need a freaking pill to solve the issue. She said she was going to make me an appointment with psych.
I finally said sure, what ever.

I left there feeling very angry. I keep picturing her smiling at me and trying to argue that all depression is a medical problem needing medication. Like she was enjoying a debate with me. I had just told this woman I was having anxiety issues and she wants to debate with a screaming woman.

I will never, never, never allow that woman to be my care provider again. Next time I go to clinic I will tell every doctor I see what happened and how I feel about it.  I really wanted to punch her in the head and get that freaking grin off her face. If I where truly mentally altered I might have.


Thanks for letting me vent.

[vivyt]

Win- Wow! She sure sounds like a bitch. I am sorry that you had to go through all that. It makes sense that it would be shingles since you said that you've been having anxiety attacks and that is what provokes it. I hope you feel better. I agree with you about the medication. I think it works well for those who need in conjunction with therapy but too many doctors just want to prescribe pills. I hope you don't have to see her again.

Tredai- Congratulations on your marriage! I had no idea...I must have missed something.

Cristy- Well it sounds like things are going better for you. Stay warm.

Betty- That snow is CRAZY! Now that you have a taste for the good weather it makes it difficult to deal with the cold. It has been in the low 80's here...I am sending some warmth your way....

Nothing much going on here. I guess that's a good thing...I am going to take a shower and go to bed early...

[tendai]

Queen - i'm glad u had a great birthday and got a new man in your life
Tre - congrats on the marriage, im happy for you
Wendy - that woman needed a sock in the teeth. i hope they can get you someone else on your next visit
Viv - gone to the gym yet?
Betty - careful u dont get buried in snow soon..
Nothing much going on over here.  Work's fine. A lot slower than usual, where we used to see 20-30 patients a day we now see less than 10. Its expensive now $50US consultation. some afford it but most cant.  My landlady increased my rent to $150US from $50. Then took it down to $100. I was like 'Oh ok." and started making plans to move. for that much i can get a place with doors inside and a ceiling and my own bathroom. my little sister i stay with is moving out of town so i'll be alone again.  Guess thats the push i needed to get the guts to move finally. My main requirement for a new place is my own bathroon please God, i hate this business of having anyone and everyone using ours. Plus its outside.  Its weird that i feel bad about leaving my landlady, she's  a very nice woman.  its her evil daughter-in-law thats the problem.  and its not her fault the place is built so shabby. well anyway its not like they wont find someone to move in if i leave.
I'm still with Mr oout of town. He was here for about 3 days.  He's great in small doses. Too much of him is not so good.  He's got this filthy mouth. Words like "shit' and 'f**k' sound so much more obscene when spoken in our language and i cringe everytime he says them. I've started smacking him everytime he says something i find offensive.  Think i'll have to carry a stick coz my hands will end up getting more sore than his head

[minismom]

Betty, my darling, I feel your pain.  It snowed all yesterday and is supposed to continue today.  We're not getting the accumulation that you are - maybe 3 inches by tomorrow, but it is blue blazin' cold.  As I sit here - before 6am - it's 15 degrees.  Cold? Yes.  But, it will feel like a Miami summer tomorrow when I wake up to 2 degrees.  We've not hit negative numbers, yet, but I feel it coming in the near future. 

I just hope I can get out today to the ENT appointments.  They are 1 1/2hrs away and to the north, where they got more snow.  The going yesterday to the eye doc wasn't too bad, but coming home took forever - over 2hrs - because no one would drive over 40 (in a 70mph zone).  #6 got a new prescription for glasses.  She wanted red glasses, but they didnt' have any small enough, so she chose purple.  The ones she has now are pink.  I was hoping for a primary color, but after being there for 3hrs, and facing the long ride home, it wasn't worth the argument.  We're changing eye specialists.

Wendy, hun, I would've knocked the woman silly then plead not guilty by mental defect.  How could she argue since she's the one who said you had one?  I end up arguing with every health care provider that sees my kids.  They have papers on their walls and letters after their names.  Who are we to argue?  The minion masses who live with ourselves everyday - how dare we question their authority after a 10 minute exam?   

And, um, Tre, you come waltzing in here, announce you are now married and give us NO details??  What's up with that?  We are women and therefore thrive on the juicy stuff.  So get your hiney back in here and dish it out.  Pictures would also be VERY nice.

I hope you all have a great day.  I need to turn on the news and check out the road conditions.  I really hate to reschedule ENT today, but I'd really hate to wreck even more.  I have until 8 to decide - we'll need to leave about 8:30. 

Much love to you all,
Mum

[vivyt]

Tenda- LOL! No I haven't been to the gym yet....so much for intentions...

[BT65]

Morning ladies,

Cristy, I'm glad things are improving and I hope you get your unemployment.

TreDai, congratulations!  I didn't even know you had someone special in your life.

Wendy, I absolutely cannot stand it when I know how I feel and someone tries to tell me it's not how I feel.  Did that make sense?

Andrea, could you send the warmth again?  I'm not feeling it.

Tendai, do you not have a ceiling where you live?  I hope you get a better place when you move.  I'll be thinking about you.

Mum, purple glasses, aye?  Nothing wrong with that.  Actually sounds pretty cool.

Well, it's only 7F degrees here.  And we got about 3 more inches on top of the 10 we already had.  I swear, when I went out yesterday, there are spots I can stand in where the snow comes up to my thighs.  The thing that's driving me crazy is that it's one system after another.  We're supposed to be getting wind gusts up to 35mph later today and more lake-effect snow.  How much more can we get for God's sake?!

So far, my school is open.  I don't think we're going to close.  But, I don't know how many out of town people will be there tonight.  The city's road crew didn't even plow the side streets, so when I went out yesterday, there was about 4 inches of snow on the streets, which made it very hard to get around in.  OK, I'll quit bitching about the weather.  I hope you ladies have a good day.

[Winiroo]

Makes perfect since Betty. I think this lady is wayyyy to clinical for her own good. She lacks the ability to connect with people in a human way. She appears to only be able to dribble out text book knowledge.

Tend - There are a few reasons this lady did not get punched in the mouth. A: I dont want to go to jail and B: I have never in my life punched anyone in the face and C: I'm honestly not as crazy as she apparently thinks I am.

I can still fantasise about it. 

[netta]

Hi ladies, been missing action. Winn I feel you about that woman, I would have cursed her out! I am going through a similar thing myself Winn. I have been on Zoloft for years about (20 plus) and have tried to stop on my own but the withdrawls are like heroin with drawls!!! I have nightmares and such!!! I also suffer from anxiety but I am not crazy or depressed. MY docs told me the same thing, that i need this med cause of a chemical imbalance!!!! I hadbeen described them long ago when i was going through a real depression, they called it clinical depression, after having an abortion. I found out this was normal after having an abortion, I felt really guilty, but it was a suprise pregnancy and i was not with the father who was already married and a coke head. Long story I won'tget into now, that was back in the late 80s.! I wentcold turkey and in the early 90s had to get back on them. Anyhow I am trying to get off them, when Igo back to my id or primary care docs I will see about weaning off them. Its something I really know about and the shingles also.I had a bad outbreak in 94.Since then  I have been having small outbreaks on my backside from time to time, and I tested negative for herpes, I know its shingles .I get acyclovir sometimes but mostly they go away on there own.
I hope things work out for you, I know how u feel.Yesterday I had a gyn appointment and the doc put me back on the premarin for my hotflashes and nite sweats. I ask her if the premarin was dangerous , she said no as long as u get regular checkups but then She also has me getting xrays to make sure I have no cyst or tumors. since I have pain sometimes after having a hysterectomy in 02. Reminder Oprah has a show this week on hormone treatment.
well me and my sweety are still talking on the phone every day until he gets everything set with his move.( he is waiting on his w4 and pink slip from his job )since they are laying off and closing . Ladies I have no secrets for meeting a man, just Prayer!!!!
Queen -Happy belated Birthday!!!!

[Winiroo]

Oh gosh I hate it when doctors do that. You had every right to feel depressed.
I feel that taking the pills would lengthen the problem and have always been resistant to taking any antidepressant. I have no problem with taking an anti anxiety medication PRN as long as I dont become dependent on the pills. It really bothers me when doctors treat everything as a medical problem. Not everything can be solved with medicine. We are humans. We experience wide aray of negative emotions and it is perfectly normal to feel badly when something bad happens.
Now if I told the doctor I was having bad feelings and was uncomfortable with them and needed his/her help then I would be open to talking about suggestions.
However if a doctor asks me how I have been feeling and I am honest with them and then tell them I do not want to be on medication and that I feel that I am mentally stable and that this is not a medical issue they should listen and not insist that I am wrong.

Good luck with getting off the Zoloft Netta. I have heard so many stories of people having difficulty getting off these types of medications. I know they can be helpful for many people but its just not for me.

[vivyt]

Netta- Please be careful trying to get off the Zoloft. You are not supposed to just stop. It can really mess you up. You are supposed to ease off it. My Dad used to take it for anxiety as well and it does work for some. It definitely worked with him. If you want to stop taking it tell your doctor because it can be dangerous to quit cold turkey.

Betty- I wish I could bottle the sunshine and send it your way. Stay inside!

Mum- I used to have a pair of red glasses. I think I was in 7th grade...

Wendy- I would never hit someone either but sure is nice to run the scenario through your head.

Things are moving right along. I have some grading and planning to do tonight and that is what I am going to do right after I finish eating. Have a good night all my friends!

[minismom]

Would it be so hard for a doctor to walk in the room, look me in the face and say, "Mrs. L, I hear you and I understand. You live with her and obviously know more about her than I do. Tell me what's going on.  What can I do to help you?"  I mean, honestly, would it cause some sort of rip in the time-space continuum?  Instead, yesterday, the ear doc walked in, said #6 "looked good", told me to take up Mini's ear issues with Doc, said, "see you in 6mths.", and left.

 I did NOT just drive 1 1/2hrs to be told to come back in 6mths.I chased him down the hall! I literally followed him into the next patient's room.  What about her hearing test?  I've called Doc and she won't return my calls!  I need you to take a look at Mini's ears and talk about tubes.  Do you even have her record?  YES, she has an appointment -I called a week ago.  I don't care about HIPPA - you should have thought about HIPPA before you blew me off!  No, I will NOT step out until you at least agree to have #6's hearing tested you jerk! 

So, on to the hearing test .  #6 was very cooperative and ran through the entire series of tests which takes about 1/2 hour, or so.  When the audiologist came in to talk about the results, I brought up the necessity of aiding #6's right ear.  She argued with me "yadda, yadda, yadda...she can still hear, her hearing isn't that bad, it's not effecting her speech...oh, she's blind in her right eye, too?  I'm sorry to hear that (again!)...yadda, yadda, yadda..." 

I asked her to bring me the paper results, I wanted to read them.  She grinned and went to get them.  I made a comment about #6's consistent dip in the high frequencies.  She nodded and said that the loss wasn't negatively effecting her.  "What sounds are in those frequencies?"  A nervous look to the left, an eye roll, a spin around the room, a polite rub on #6's head, eyes back to me, a heavy sigh, and the admission, (quoted because nobody can make this stuff up) "All the important stuff.  All constanants and most of the vowels, dipthongs.  Basically, normal speech."  WHAT!!!!   Oh, good grief!!  So now not hearing speech doesnt' negatively effect someone?  Not hearing speech doesn't effect speech?  BITE ME!

I collected our coats, my purse, took the girls' hands, and walked out.  I didn't even take my billing sheet to the front desk.  I left in on the table.  I still can't believe it.  And, that's not the worst of it.

*If you're still with me, here's what happened when we got home*

#6 is very animated when she gets going with her babbling.  She ran up to me, all wide eyed, and I panicked!!  Tuesday her eyes were dialated at 1:40pm, Wednesday at 3:30pm, her left eye was still dialated and non-reactive to light.  I immediately called the eye institute.  Her right eye was slightly dialated, but had gone down enough to be light reactive, but we got nothing out of her left eye.  I was told that the doctor would be paged and call me back with-in half hour.  It's now 18hrs later and NO phone call.  Her left eye has gone down a bit, but it's still non-reactive.  I've called them back and got ugly, but I don't expect anything will come from it.  Now a blizzard has come through and I don't think we can even get to the highway.   I'm so totally PISSED.

Hope everyone is having a wonderful day.  Love to you all.  If you read all of this, thank you.
Mum

[cjc]

Minsmum, I read all of that and must say:that is ridiculous. That you have to argue with the doctor's to get them to provide( what I consider) basic care for your children. Good for you for standing up to those jerks. And for them to say that # 6's hearing is not that bad!! How can she be expected to speak correctly if  she cannot hear the sounds. Sorry didn't mean to rant, that just makes me angry . I know you will handle it but for you to be forced to go to extremes is stupid.        Wendy, I hear you about wanting to punch that lady. I have an extremely bad temper and  one of the  things that keeps me in check is:I don't want to go to jail. Been there, hate it. Also, I don't want to be separated from my Robert. He gets stressed here lately if he can't find me.                                                                                    On a bright note, I talked To unemployment yesterday morning and it is approved. It will total around 425 per month and I am so glad. I have a whole list of stuff we need so Saturday when the card comes(it should have 5 weeks worth on it) Robert and I are going shopping. He needs new sweatpants and undies and the house needs quite a few things. I need really nothing, I am good.( well maybe a little smoke would be nice,I've been out for 2 months, more important things to buy.)But it sure is a stress relief to know that money is coming. And I can help on rent, my dad got laidoff 2 weeks ago so they are struggling. He is a trucker with a 30 year excellent driving record so he will find another job.  Robert went on a field trip today, to see a play about the 3 Little pigs. He was so excited.  Things are good, I am just chilling, washed dishes, swept the floors, cleaned the bathroom. I feel like Suzie Homemaker but I feel good cause it's clean.   Hope you ladies have a great day

[BT65]

Morning ladies,

Wendy, most doctors I have known try to prescribe meds for every problem.  I guess it's because that's what they're trained to do.

Netta, I hope you're getting off the Zoloft slowly.  It's not good to just "stop" the medication.   Even though the medication is not "addicting" per se, there are withdrawals the body goes through if you go off cold turkey.  If you really want to get off of it, please see your doctor.  I just don't want you to go through something you don't have to.

Andrea, I'm glad school's rolling along for you.

Mum, that really pisses me off about those doctors.  Doesn't sound like either one is that concerned.  My sister in Arizona goes through the same thing with the kids she watches (mentally and/or physically impaired).  I hope you get some answers.  Are you going to a different ENT?  How are #6's eyes?

Cristy, I'm so glad your unemployment is approved.  That's got to be a relief.  I couldn't imagine no income. 

Well, the weather is 2F degrees right now and we got a couple more inches of snow.  All the schools in the area are shut down, except colleges.  I don't understand why the colleges aren't shut down.  I haven't been outside yet.  Hell, I just got up about 1/2 an hour ago.  I've been sleeping lately until like 9:30, 10:00 a.m.  I'm not sure why.  Before I went to Arizona, I always was up by 8:00 a.m.  I don't think it could be because I'm still not over the 2 hour time difference with as long as I've been back.  I'm just very, very tired lately and don't know why. 

Today I think the only thing I'm going to do, besides going to school tonight (and that's a maybe) is to clean off my car and start it for a couple minutes so it will start tonight (if I go to school).  I didn't go last night because of the weather.  I guess a few other people didn't either.  It's assinine of my school to stay open, since some people drive 50 miles to get to it.  It's really assinine of any school to stay open during this crap.  We're supposed to get 3-6 more inches of snow today.  Yesterday, I did go to the beauty supply store to get my haircolor.  There was a lady at the checkout who was saying, "hell, years ago you couldn't see the ground from November through March.  The weather always used to be like this.  We just got spoiled."  Funny, I don't remember it being quite this bad for so long a period of time.  Of course, she could have been talking about before my time also.

Nothing else going on right now.  You ladies have a good day.

[Winiroo]

Funny you mention that Betty. One of the last things I said to her was that I realise that she is trained to handle all problems in a clinical way but she needed to understand not everything can be fixed with a pill or her medical training.

Mum - holy majolly crap on a stick! LOL Sounds like you had a messed up time with the docs too. Too bad we cant kick people or pull hair without getting in trouble. 

I had another poop day. I went to the pharmacy to pick up meds for the elderly man I care for and the credit card I use to pay for his needs did not have enough to pay for his meds. I dont get why they dont pay the card off at the end of the month so that there is never an issue with a credit limit. Its not like he does not have a ton of money. Not a huge deal really. It was annoying. He has enough medicine until tommorrow. His family will just have to go get his refills untill they fix the problem with the credit limit. I still get paid either way. 

[minismom]

Wendy, I had to laugh at your response.  The ENT is bald but boy, I would have LOVED to yank that audiologist's pony tail right out of her head!  Have you seen the movie "Matilda" when the teacher grabbed a girl by her pig tails and swung her around? LOL..that's what I kept imagining.    We will begin hunting for a new audiologist and ENT. 

The eye institute called this afternoon and said that we don't need to worry.  It can take up to 3 days for dilated eyes to go back to normal.  The difference in size was due, most likely, to the amount of medication each eye absorbed.  I told the lady it was nice of her to call, but it would've been NICER if someone would have called YESTERDAY.  Then, I could have SLEPT instead of being AWAKE worried that something was WRONG with my CHILD!  She apologized.  I told her not to say things she didn't mean.  Ignoring people must run in the family - did I mention that the eye doc is the PID's husband?

We found an Occupational Opthamologist in Beckley - about 3hrs drive.  I've heard tons of wonderful things about him, but he's hard to get into see.  He even gives people computer programs to help with their vision, coordination, ect.  When we're done, we send it back to him, and he'll mail us another one. My friend with 15 kids goes to him and if she loves him, then I should at least be able to put up with him .

Other than that, I have nothing to report.  The blizzard that we were supposed to have today didn't do anything - it stayed more north and east of us.  We have a full weekend: Friday we're going to see a group of Uganda.  They sing, play traditional music, and do traditional dancing.  I can't wait.  Saturday, we're going to a conference that teaches churches how to incorporate special needs kids into their services / programs / ect.  It's free with a catered dinner and activities for the kids.  Then Sunday night is our church wide birthday party.  They hired a comedian / magician.  It should be lots of fun.

Christy, hun, you aren't saying anything that I haven't felt.  You feel free to rant away! LOL  I'm glad to hear about your unemployment coming in.  I know it takes a huge burden off your heart.

I need to finish up school with the kids.  We went grocery shopping this morning for fear the weather would get bad this afternoon.  Other than that and laundry, I have not a thing planned.

Love to you all - the weekend is almost here!!
Mum

[Winiroo]

LOL I have seen that movie several times. Nice mental picture.
I'd be freaked out too about the eye dilation. I'd be worried she had a stroke or God knows what.
I'm glad you have an alternate Opthamologist to take the kiddos to. Stinks it is 3 hours away. But I hope it turns out to be a good doctor/patient relationship.

[Queen Tokelove]

Hey Ladies---

Sorry, I haven't checked in. I have been caught up with Rey, the new guy. We have seen each other everyday. He hurt his leg, I think he slipped on some ice around his house or something. He has to wear a knee brace but won't take anything for the pain. I get that, I don't like pain pills either all like that.

I know what you mean about doctors. My ID doc gets like that at times. When I think he is over medicating me, I kind of just let what he says go in one ear and out the other. Though they are medical professionals I still say a person knows their bodies better than they do. And other times I think docs just do it so they can get paid more. Finding a good doc that listens is like finding a needle in a haystack.

The weather here is bad too. Last weekend my town had a city emergency that lasted until Monday. We are suppose to get 3-5 more inches tonight with the temp down to 8 degrees. I can deal with that, I am just tired of shoveling. I shoveled the back porch this morning, it was deep as hell but I had fun. I threw Lucifer in the snow, well not throw, just kind of tossed him in some deep snow. Had a little snowball fight with him.

Not much else going on with me.......

R.I.P...Ricardo Montalban

[Veritee]

Dear All

Sorry I have not dropped by for a few days - amazing how much happens if you are off here for a while, so I am sorry if I cannot catch up .

I have not been on here recently because my lovely mum died on Tuesday. As I said here previously she has been ill for some time and in hospital for some weeks with what we all knew would be her final illness.

She was 84 so she had had a longish life but not always and easy one and I just wish she had not spent the last few years as she did. But thankfully she is in peace now - But I do not think I will be able to relax and get back to normal until her funeral has happened - which is not for another week.

I will try to catch up then here after that.

Wendy - that awful health professional struck a cord with me and it makes me very angry - I get very angry when we are not listened too and inexperienced workers who actually probably no nothing about life - or perhaps nothing about our lives as they probably have never faced the sorts of stresses many of us face - and are therefore maybe not that good at their job anyway!!!!  Think they know best and think they know you, your body and mind better than you do!!! -------- Which is plainly not so and is ridiculous.

Yes I too wish we coudl yank their hair or something when they do that!!

We do need Doctors etc do have the training to prescribe ( and we are not allowed to prescribe for ourselves and that would be chaotic so we need someone trained to do this) diagnose/treat and find funding/resources for our treatment  but they have to listen to us too! Its our body and mind and our feelings, descriptions, symptoms not theirs and within the limits of our non medical knowledge, we do know ourselves best!!!!!!!!

I have had trouble from time to time with inexperienced and disrespectful young workers trying to treat or medicate me unnecessarily i.e. antidepressants and not listening to me or showing me any real respect or empathy and patronise me. But more so recenty since my HIV was diagnosed.

I know I do not need anti-depressants but I would also know if I did - I am sure you would also Wendy.

But I am not clinically depressed and would know if I was but I have not had an easy life and have had most of my 50 odd years of life, to live with considerable stress,  - which I do actually cope with very well -

and of course since being diagnosed with HIV, and I have only been diagnosed for a year and having had a very ill husband with AIDs for a while , worries about my daughter and a dying mother plus money and other realted worries a hightly paid UK doctor does not have nor would ever understand ...............so my stress has been considerable over the last year, I do not have depression in fact I am not at all depressed, btu I do face considerable very real stresses.

Plus I suffer a lifelong phobia which can cause panic attacks when extra anxious or stressed - but none of this means I am clinically depressed or need or would benefit from antidepressants !!!But an inexperienced and I felt incompetent HIV doctor I had at first suggested they would and was like what you describe - not listening to me and acting like she knew best

In fact for my phobia and stress caused occasional panic attacks I know anti - depressants are not helpful to me at all and make me worse.....As after all I am 55 years old and know myself well and years ago when in late teens I was prescribed Anti-Ds for my phobia/panics which made me much worse in fact  ill and took me  a while to get off of, and I know they would be of no help to me now.

Yet I still now and then meet ignorant doctors that suggest that my very real sadness and stress due to my situation - would be helped by anti-depressants!!

And I hate it when they do not listen to you about medical conditions/symptoms that you know more about than them when it is about how it affects you!!!

Anyway sorry to rant also – and to highjack your issue Wendy!!

but I have had a lot of this myself since diagnosed HIV, because I guess when I go to the doctors about it I tell the truth, I say yes I am sad and unhappy and stressed. But I also say given the situation I am coping very well and I know what I need from them and I will ask and I need them to listen to me first and aknowledge that I am an expert on me


I KNOW I know my body and mind and what I need and what will help better than them and I am sure you do too Wendy

Same goes for Mum with your children and knowing what is wrong with them. You are right! Good doctors ask YOU what is wrong before they jump to conclusions and base their diagnosis on what you say. I am lucky as I finally have a HIV consultant who does this and listens to me, but it took me most of the year to get her

Tredai- Huge Congratulations, I missed that completely as I did not even realise you were seriously with anyone, but I hope you are very happy.

Queen - sorry I missed your birthday. I hope you had a good time? Sorry your new guy has hurt his leg - look after him!

Sorry to all I have left out, but my mind is scrambled due to my mums death - we are still arranging the funeral etc which will not be till next Saturday 24th and I have 2 younger siblings that are very upset and an older brother who is also upset and I am upset - she was a wonderful person and wonderful mum and we will miss her

Veritee XX

[vivyt]

I don't have time to respond to everyone yet. I just wanted to pop in and say Happy Friday! It's a 3-day weekend for me which really means an extra day to get some work done...LOL! It's never ending.

[BT65]

Morning ladies,

Mum, I'm glad you found a new ophthalmologist.  Have fun this weekend.

Wendy, I don't know why that man's family doesn't help him keep his bills paid up if he has all that money.  Are they neglectful?

Queen, that's cute about Lucifer.  If I did that to my cat, she'd probably have a heart attack.  I sympathize with Rey; I have to wear my knee brace every day, or my joints pop in and out.

Veritee, I'm so sorry about your mum.  Please accept my condolences.  I lost mine a year and a half ago and it's not easy.  I'll be thinking about you.

Andrea, enjoy your 3-day weekend.

Well, it's -10F here (yes, negative 10).  This is unbelievable.  I was talking to one of my friend's mums yesterday and I asked her if she remembers the weather being this bad in the past years, and she said maybe with the snow, but not with these frigid temps.  It's awful.  I didn't go to school last night, and neither did a lot of my friends.  I don't even know why they kept it open.  At 7:00 p.m. last night, it was like -15F.  Too cold for anyone to be out.  The high today is supposed to be 1F.  Tomorrow though it's supposed to recover a bit at around 15F.  Come on spring!

Today I was actually thinking about going to see a movie.  I want to see "Gran Torino."  That's supposed to be alright.  Has anyone gone to see "The Curious Case of Benjamen Button?"  I've heard mixed reviews and wasn't sure if it would be worth the time.  I want to see "Revolutionary Road," but it's not playing around here yet.  And who knows, I might just stay here all day and only go outside to start the car and make sure it runs for a couple minutes with these temps.  Other than that, I have nothing planned.  You ladies have a good day.

[Winiroo]

Sorry for your loss Veritee. You said exactly what I was feeling. I have some phobias and occasionally have an anxiety attack too. But I'm never wacked out mentally when I am having one. Its just my body freaking out and my mind trying to coax my body into relaxing because I know logically there is no reason for my body to be freaking out.

Betty I saw Benjamin Button. I liked it very much. I'd like to see Gran Torino too.
The payment for the credit card may have crossed paths with my need to buy his medication. I'm not sure. I wouldn't say they are neglectful. But they do allow him to drive when a doctor has said he definitely should not. That bothers me. Its easier than the fight that would ensue from them not allowing him to use his car and they would likely have to get guardianship over him in order to enforce it. Which also would take time and effort. Now that I have had time to think about it I'm sure the credit card payment had not gotten to the card company and thats all it was. It was just frustrating is all. It has never happened before.

[Snowangel]

Veritee-
Sorry to hear about your Mum, you have my condolences.

Mum- Good for you tracking down that doctor, I can't even imagine how frustrating that was.  I hope the new doc works out.  I have been trying Splenda in my tea and I found some sugarless hard candy with splenda in them that are actually pretty good.  Thank you!!

BT- I haven't seen either of those movies, Gran Torino sounds good.  I wanted to see seven pds but the reviews aren't so good.  I feel you on the cold, it was -4 when I took the kids to school this morning.  I really wish I could move, this weather is making me nuts.  I hate being stuck in the house.  I always wanted to go to AZ but don't know if I could handle the heat. I would move in a heartbeat if I didn't have this child custody BS going on.

cjc- Glad to hear you got your benefits coming, that is a relief.

Queen- Your cat sounds funny. Glad things are going well with Rey?

Netta- I hope things work out with your meds.

Win- Hope you and Billy are doing well.

Keeping- How are you and the family doing?  How is the puppy doing?

Viv- You mentioned tweezermans in one of your posts and I had never heard of them.  I saw some in Bed Bath and Beyond and I thought I would try them.  They work pretty good so Thanks for the tip

I have been miserable lately.  I really hate this time of year. I have no energy and I am always tired.  I drop the kids off at school and came home and slept all day.  My oldest had a therapist appt today at 4:15, we got there at 4:00, she finally comes out of her office at 4:35, didn't know we were scheduled, which wouldn't be bad, if this wasn't the second time it happened.  I know there is a light at the end of the tunnel somewhere, I just can't find it right now?? I really need to start working out and getting my head together so I am 150% by the time I have to go to court in April.  I think I have been dreaming about what happened a lot lately because my hand was hurting , my SO told me I punched him in the head 2 different times while I was sleeping.   OOPS!!

Well I hope everyone has a good weekend!  Anybody celebrating the inauguration (sp?)?  I told the kids I would make a cake.  It is so cute when the little ones see him on TV, they get really excited and say "Mommy, Rock Bama!!?

[BT65]

I saw Gran Torino this afternoon and it was an excellent movie.  You all should go see it. 

That's all.  Have a good evening ladies.

[vivyt]

Veritee- I am sorry to hear about your mother.

Betty- I don't blame you for not going to school. I would not go out of the house at all in weather like that.
I want to see Gran Torino, Nixon Frost, and Doubt. I might just wait till they come out on DVD. Benjamin Button doesn't appeal to but I think that is because I think Brad Pitt is overrated.

Snow- I'm glad you liked the tweezers. They are more expensive than others but they last a long time. You can also send them in to be sharpened. You asked about the inauguration...at school we are going to watch it on TV. We are doing a little project explaining all the parts of the day. The kids are really interested. We have talked about how this is history making and how they get to be a part of it. We had an "election" too in November. I made a point to let them know that no matter what people's opinion is, it's still exciting to be a part of it.

Hmmm....let's see...what do I have planned this weekend? I have to go to the dentist tomorrow for a cleaning. They were going to do it last time but I had enough on New Year's Eve. Other than that...just resting! 

[Veritee]

Thank you so much all for your kind words about my mum - she was a great mother and I will miss her very much I am sorry to others who have also ever lost peoplethey love.

I am afraid I am really upset this morning about my mum and because last night I had an awful row/argument  with my husband - I suppose it was bound to happen as I am very upset about my mum and so started to talk about how she was to me as a mum and this led to me talking about how it was for me to be a mum.

I wanted a bit of love and support but this is always a subject I just can not get on with my husband as try as I might the one thing I resent him so much for was staying in his job at sea - as a marine engineer away often for months on end for up to 8 months a year - after I had my baby.

I am afraid when she was born 20 years ago I just assumed that once we had a family he would come home from the sea for good and we could have a 'normal' family life!

But he never came home -

despite my pleading with him to so many times in the last 20 years and we never had what I thought of as a 'normal' family life because I brought my daughter up alone and for me it was worse than being a single mum - as had I been a single mum at least I could have had relationships and perhaps found someone to keep me company as I was quite attractive then etc?

But with a husband always at sea and only home for short stays I was often bitterly lonely - I did have many friends but I wanted a lover - and I was often physically on my own with my daughter for long periods because I live in a rural farm and of course friends only stay to chat for an hour or so ............

so I had so many long horrible dark evenings and days on my own with just my child and me and i hated it -so I was not a good mother to her either as she knew I was so unhappy and that being just with her was not enough for me .

I would go out when I could and of course worked but when she was asleep etc I had no choice but to stay in alone. And that was for a lot of time in 20 years of being married to a seaman!!

Anyway I totally hated it and at times hated him for not leaving the sea. I may have left him if he had made it clear and said he would never leave - but he was scared of losing me so he would never tell the truth which was he intended to work until he retired at 65 ...he would just say perhaps next year or perhaps when we get financially better off or perhaps thi or maybe that ...........and I would try so hard not to spend money so that we could have the money for him to leave and I would pray that this year would be the year he came home for good!!!!!!!!!

But I began to realise he never would and was and still am very angry about it . And angry at him for stringing me along for so many years by not telling me the truth that he never intended to leave the sea


but its OK most of the time as long as I do not get on the subject of my being a mother with my husband.

But with my mum just dying I did and then I poured out my anger with him and bitterness that he would not leave the sea to be a proper father to her and a husband to me .

And this is made worse that it is because he got HIV that he finally lest the sea and only then!! And he lost us our main income and also he is not yet well enough to work.

and now 20 years later my child is grown up and I made so many mistakes as a mother because I absolutely HATED being alone as a mother..............................................and then, when its too late to save the relationship with me and my daughter - my husband did leave the sea - but only because he has HIV.

And the other point is that if he had not been a seaman and away at sea and lonely and therefore had sex with other women - he - and I - would not have HIV!!!

So I am afraid I was just so nasty to him last night. It is not fair as what is done is done and you can not change the past and he is home here with me now...

but I know he is only here with me after over 26 years at sea because he has HIV and they will not let him work at sea so he lost his job!!!!!

So last night my bitterness and anger came out when I remembered all those awful years bringing Caja up on my own and the loneliness I felt and the mistakes I made and how I begged him at times to leave the sea and be with us ....and he did not/would not.

What did he do instead? - he screwed another woman while in Brazil and gave us both HIV .

Now I have to somehow repair the nastiness I gave to him last night as while I will never understand why he did not leave the sea and I can not see me ever really forgiving him totally for staying at sea and while at sea sleeping with someone else and giving me HIV ......I do love him and I do not want to leave him now -

but he isnow today  threatening to leave me because I always get nasty if the subject goes on to him working at sea - it does not happen that often,  but he says he can not stand my anger at that anymore - and I do not blame him but can not seem to shut up whenever my being a mum is talked about.

So I have to try to make it up today - and another thing he said is that I do not do anything much now except go on the internet!! and he is sick of this too!

Which is not quite true but it is a bit true

as I do web design and run a support forum and come on here and other forums I am on my PC a lot and he does not like it - but it is the only place I get to speak to other women living with HIV and the internet is the only place I get any support at all for me - so I do spend a lot of time on the internet and he does not like it or understand it as he does not use computers at all..

Sorry this is all about me

But I am really scared that as well as just losing my mum my husband will carry out his threat and leave and I am so scared I will lose him too - I have already lost my daughter also as she says she will never live at home again and anyway she has a good job in London over 300 miles away

So if he leaves now it feels what was the point of all theses years that I stayed with him and struggled with hating being on my own and bringing my daughter up alone while he was at sea!! What was the whole point of my last 20 years of my life!!

I know I will get over it as it is partly my grief over my mum and I hope I can persude him not to leave.
 
But right now it feels like I have wasted 20 years of my life with a man wo did not love me enough to give up a job that I hatted and not an ordinary job but one that meant he was never home
so we hardly, if ever, had any time or fun at all as a family and now my daughter is all grown up and we have HIV - so it feels my life has been such a waste

sorry I will be Ok in a while

[minismom]

I have got to tell you about the concert that we went to last night.  It was the most AMAZING thing I have ever seen and I'm still on a high from it.  It was the Watoto Children's Chior from Uganda, Africa.  There were 16 kids ranging in age from 8 - 12 and 7 adults.  The way those kids sang and danced gave me goosebumps.  In between songs, some of the children told their stories.  But, first, some background.

Watoto Village was started in 1993 by an American couple who moved to Uganda and saw a need to start a "kingdom of compassion".  There are now 3 Watoto villages that house nearly 1700 children who were orphaned due to HIV/AIDS and war. Each village is self-contained with modern houses (1 house mother and 8 children per house), their own school, and fully staffed medical clinic.  The children have 3 meals a day, snacks, clothes, uniforms, thier own beds, shoes, medications, and go to school M-F. 

There is a separate Watoto Gulu village that houses children who were rescued from the military regime.  There they are given counsoling, schooling, and therapy.  Once they have completed the program, they are moved to one of the other Watoto villages.  Also, in 2007, a special complex called Bullrushes was built for abandoned babies ages birth-2yrs old.  Many of the babies they found in trash heaps, dumps, abandoned buildings, and hospitals.  The babies are raised in Bullrushes until they are 2 and graduate to the Watoto Village.

Along with all of that, they are also opening a home called "living hope" for HIV+ women and single mothers.  They will have housing, medical care, counsoling, and be taught a vocation. Their children will be housed with them and will receive medical care and an education.

To hear these children talk about their lives was heart-breaking.  Because their parents had HIV/AIDS they weren't allowed to work and the family became outcasts.  The kids couldn't go to school because they couldn't pay the fees, the watched family members die from the war, the boys were hidden so they wouldn't be kidnapped by the military, then their parents died and things only got worse.  Then, someone brought them to the Watoto Village.  One of the kids said, "yesterday, I thought I was nothing.  But, today, I have hope."

The children are taught to be proud of being Ugandan.  They are being raised to become leaders so that when they move from Watoto (no one is ever made to leave), they can become positive influences in their country.  The kids shared that they want to become doctors, lawyers, teachers, accountants, farmers, and one boy named Julian (who I wanted to keep) wants to be a bus driver so that he can go find kids and drive them to Watoto where they can find hope.

Mim went up to one of the girls after the concert and gave her a hug.  She said, "I'm sorry you lost your parents.  They died from Hiv.  I have HIV, but I'm not going to die from it." 

I cried from the time the lights went down until we left.  I have never been so moved in my life.  We bought 2 of their C.D.s, so I cried all the way home, too.  The last song they sang was called "African Lulliby."  I'll leave you with some of the words:

Who will sing my lulliby?  Who will touch me when I cry?  Who will hold me when I'm scared?  I've lost everyone I love.  My father, my brothers, my sisters.  I cry for my mother, but she's not there.  Who will sing me a lulliby?

Mum
www.Watoto.com

[cjc]

Veritee, I am so sorry about the loss of your mother.     AS to the fight with your husband, I am sorry about that too but maybe you needed to get some of that anger out.                                            Not much going on here, I went to Walmart yesterday to get my medicine and the Toyota overheated cause the water in the radiator was frozen. My dad said if I would not have stopped when I noticed the steam, then I would have blown the engine. So glad I noticed. He added Antifreeze, Ladies make sure there is plenty of Antifreeze in your radiator, and drove the Toyota home. I got to drive the 2008 GMC, a real treat. I've driven it before but he doesn't know that. Mom does but not dad.   Got my approval letter yesterday but am waiting on my debit card with the money on it. It should be here today or Tuesday. Monday is a national (Federal?) holiday so the mail doesn't run.                                            Mum that concert sounded great. That is so sweet , what Mini said Queen, in the summertime, I throw the cats in the water barrel, they don't like it but I think it is funny. Sorry your friend hurt his Knee. I don't like most pain-pills, they make me sick or hostile.                 Betty, I would love to see Gran Torino, My parents went to see it and my dad thought it was great. Try to stay warm.                              Viv, they are out of school for 3 days here, Monday for the Holiday , Tues and Wed for teacher workdays. We have a meeting with  Robert's teacher Wed to talk about his writing.                                         Snow, sorry things are bad for you lately, I hope they get better.            Well, gotta go, the dryer is calling me. Hope everyone has a great day. TTYL. Cristy

[BT65]

Morning ladies,

Snow, what state do you live in?  Our weather sounds comparable.  About the inauguration...some of the local Obama supporters are having something at a restaurant.  I might go to that, or I might go to one of my friend's apartments, and we'll have a lunch there and watch the goings-on.  Wow, that court date isn't far off.  What's going on?  Is SB trying to get custody of the children?

Andrea, good luck with the dentist.

Veritee, I'm sorry about the fight with your husband.  I'm sure you have some unresolved issues there.  Maybe you should see a counselor?  I don't really know how things work there in the UK with having to pay for counseling.  I didn't know you were still having troubles with your daughter?  I thought you were happy for her?

Mum, that concert sounds awesome.  It would have given me chills.  We never know how lucky we are, do we.

Cristy, I hope you get that debit card today.  I'm sure you're anxious to get the stuff you need.

Well, like I said last night, Gran Torino is a great movie.  It had me crying in a couple parts.  I'm a little surprised I went to see it, with what the weather conditions were last night.  Right now it's 7F out, a heat wave.  The roads are pretty bad, as when it gets this cold out, salt doesn't work.  It was worth going to see the movie though.

Today I'm supposed to be having lunch with a friend.  Yankee Candle is having their big after-Christmas sale at the mall; I was thinking about going there and seeing if they have anything left (it started Thursday).  I might just lay back down and see if I can get another hour's sleep.  This is the earliest I've been up since being back.    Anyway, nothing else planned today.  You ladies have a good one.

[Queen Tokelove]

Morning Ladies------

Not much going on with me today. I didn't see Rey yesterday or today because of work but that cool with me. I think we needed a little break. I know I am prolly over analyzing things but sometimes I think I like him too much. And kind of waiting for the shoe to drop, I know that's bad but it usually happens. He just seems too good to be true. But I have been scarred by bitch ass dudes that I guess I am a little jaded.

I am pissed off with my landlord because he was suppose to have an appraiser come look at the house.  This morning when I got up, my sister called me to the basement. There is a drain down there that backs up a little bit. It seems to happen whenever we wash clothes or I take a shower. My tub has now started to back up. I told him about this and he said he would send Roto- Rooter over to check it out but he hasn't. So when my sister called him this morning, he decided to cancel the appraiser visit and still ran that same bullshit of sending Roto_Rooter out. It's now like since he wants to sell the property, he no longer wants to fix anything. Not that there is anything major but it's like he is trying to stick it to the next person who buys this place. And he has still not paid the left over amount on the water bill that was left unpaid by the previous tenant. I sure as hell am not paying for it, that's for sure!!!!

As for movies, well, I like Clint Eastwood but that is not my type of movie. Same thing about Benjamin Button movie, though I do like Brad Pitt and Cate Blanchett. I'm stuck seeing her forever as Elizabeth, Queen of England. What I would like to see if My Bloody Valentine which is a remake on diff is that this version is in 3-D. I just love horror movies but the remakes lately has been disappointing. And being the music lover that I am, I want to see the movie Notorious which is about the life of rapper Notorious B.I. G. but if you're not into rap then you prolly have no clue as to who I am talking about. It just really burns me that no one has been able to solve his murder or Tupac's. And I think that is intentional on law enforcement's part but that's just my opinion...

I am off to chill, nothing planned today but laundry, rest and relaxation. And Veritee, you have my heart felt condolences on the passing of your mother. I know how that can be, I lost both of mine...

[Sheri]

Hello ladies,

Mum-I love the Watoto Children's Choir!  The church my mother attends here in Houston has them perform every year.  They are inspiring...they truly live their mission!  We have a few of their DVD studio recorded performances, but I prefer the live performances because they are not only entertaining, but educational.   My daughter saw them perform for the first time last year, and when the kids told their stories during the intermission, my daughter, who had been dancing and clapping along from her seat, became a bit quiet.  When we got home, she told me something to the effect of, "Mom, when they talked about how people used to hit them and spit on them because their moms had HIV, I was sad because when I was in Africa, people did that to me too.  But I didn't know it was because of my HIV; I thought it was because I was ugly.  But those kids knew why people were being mean to them and I think they thought it wasn't fair."
Veritee-I'm very sorry for your loss.  Despite the ups and downs we've had, I can't imagine losing my mother.  Anger is one of the stages of grieving, and maybe all of the unaddressed hurt you've felt due to your husband's absence is coming to the surface as a result.  I don't have any wisdom to offer, but I will keep you in my prayers.
I'm sorry if I don't directly address all of you yet in my posts the way I've seen many of you do (I mostly just reference the longer posts); it's not to exclude but more so that I'm still trying to learn who everyone is  through reading and don't want to just write something that may be seen as contrived.  I do enjoy reading the posts; it's interesting how  such a diverse group of women can be the same, yet so different.  For someone like myself who has only brothers and also has more male than female friends, it's refreshing.

[Veritee]

I am sorry I offloaded.It is an upsetting time. Death is always difficult

And Sheri I always find it hard to address people here individually, I do try but it is not that I do not care, and I do find it very interesting what I understand from the descriptions of people/women's lives on here. I do not come on here every day and so find it hard to keep up as so many things happen in our lives and as you say we are so diverse in background, current lifestyle and circumstances that I do not always relate to what people say or know what to say about it.

For example I did not know what the Watoto Children's Choir was not had I heard of it or anything like it?  Thank you for telling us about them Mum and what your daughter Mim said to them. Fantastic! it is our children that might do the most to change how HIV is viewed.

It is a concept and a choir that I could not see ex sisting or performing in the UK, or if they or others do only in the big cities like London. But they might come here, maybe they do already and it is because I am out in the country I did not know. Love to see them if they do ever perform here .

Snow and Betty
I too struggle to participate in life this time of year when it is so cold. We have had temperatures as low as -10 which is unusual for here. Perhaps for you Snow things will look up when the court case is over? I hope your OS is not to upset by you punching him in your sleep. You must be under so much stress and I find it has to come out someway. I keep saying I will start the gym again regularly but never do
 
And Betty I nearly did not go to my class either because it was so cold - I am glad I went but nearly did not

I am usually fine in the summer but while I do not sleep all the time I feel cold and always tired and spend too much time on my PC - which is partly what my husband gets annoyed about as he always tries to do something practical and constructive for at least part of the day. But then he does sleep a lot when he is not doing stuff and usually goes to bed as early as 7 to 8pm and I do not like this as he never wants to go out in the evening and I would like to go out, also it leaves me alone most evenings while he sleeps so again I go back to my computer to talk to people. It is a bad circle for me in the winter.

This is why I can not even relate to you all even when you talk about films - I have never heard of the films you talk about. We do not have a place to hire DVDs for miles, we do not have satellite TV. And I have not been out to see a film in about 5 years, not since Barry began to be tired and unwell when home and slept all the time. Nor do we go out anywhere else as he has no interest in anything but sleeping and the TV in the evenings. I am go gin to try to change this as I think it will be good for us both. If he gets tired when if we go out he can sleep in the day.

Winroo - perhap the relatives of the man you care for are being hit by what in the UK we are calling ' the credit crunch'? Do you call it that in the US?

For us what is happening is that due to the world financial situation and banks struggling many of us even with a good credit record who service our cards properly are having our credit limits on our cards severely restricted or our cards taken away altogether. I have a good credit rating and while I do not always pay off every month  I have up to now had a large limit on all cards because I pay them off about every 4 months

I do not know what it is like in the US or other places but we mostly live on card credit here. I have not carried money for years just a card and then pay the card - I have a card for different purposes, one for my daughter Caja's expenses, one for food and household things and one for luxuries and presents.

But all my cards have had my spending limit brought right down with no prior warning and one card was taken away from me by the bank. Not for not paying it but because it was my 'luxury card' and I had paid it off totally months ago and not used it since, so as by not using it I was not giving the bank any interest income they took it away with no warning!

Maybe it is the same for your old mans relatives i.e that the card spending limit was lowered drastically and unexpectedly by the bank and without their permission, or even the card facility taken away


Thank you Queen, BT65, sherri, cjc, vivyt, snow winroo - hope I have not let anyone out? - for your condolences re my mum. It will take some time to get over her death even though she was in her 80s. My dad died several years ago and even though I did not have a great relationship with him it took a while and my husband has lost both his parents and as I nursed his mum for 4 years it was sad for me too when they died.

My husband and I have had a good talk and I think we will be OK. And I am sorry if I gave the impression that we argue all the time - which we don't - or that theses arguments are triggered mostly by my anger, it is not, as most of what I feel is huge sadness and loss at the moment.

But when we argue all I see is my anger and not my sadness for that short time and then regret my anger as I do love him very much. But the only opportunity I have to get my anger out is when we argue and he also of course gets angry back. Well I suppose that's what arguments are all about but I hate and regret them and hate that we do have them now and then.

The issues that are about my relationship with my husband is - and always has been -  the sadness that we lived apart yet remained married for so long and the loneliness we BOTH felt that has led to so many consequences, including him having sex outside the marriage and him obviously not protecting himself and ultimately me - A situation that beyond a doubt would never have happend if he had not been at sea away from me and Caja for months at a time

But yes my mothers death brought up the sadness and loss I felt most of my married life and the loss I feel that due to my unhappiness for much of her growing up that I was not able to cope with my own emotional needs nor therefore meet my own daughters emotional needs and consequently I destroyed any chance of my having the great relationship with my own child that I had with my mum.

And yes I am of course very pleased and happy for her in her new life and her new job.

And do not as such have any issues with her at present - despite my feelings due to my knowing she does not like or love me and consequently her behaviour towards me not always being great - as she has mostly been a good kid and behaved well towards herself and well towards others, other than me and has done her best under the circumstances and survived well ( as she is so relsilent and determined ) with having with one parent who was never there for her at all either physically or emotionally as he was at sea and another who was there physically but was not always there for her emotionally as I was struggling so much myself, did not have enough left for her.

But I have always done my best for her to the best of my ability and love her dearly.

but I can not change that she does not love me nor care for me as I do/did my own mum. This makes me so very sad right now as I do love my daughter and wanted so much for us the same sort of relationship that I had with my mum. But it is not to be and mostly it is my fault.

At 19 and soon to be 20 she is an adult now and only she can change this if she wants to ....but for many years she has not wanted too, she is happy with the way things are and sees no reason to change. I understand why totally - but for me, especially at this time - it is a very sad fact which I struggle to come to terms with.

Anyway counselors in the UK can be got free if you only want/need about 4 to 6 sessions, above this you normally have to pay unless you are considered to have an ongoing mental health problem, which I am not.

I have over the years had counselling for the loss I have always felt at my situation of living in a marriage with a seaman and since the HIV diagnosis have had a few sessions and will after my mum is buried go for a few more and try to continue to find peace or at least acceptance.

OK - I will now stop going on about me again and thank you all for being there and at least reading my rantings. It does help.

Veritee

[minismom]

Snow, they make sugar-free Dove chocolate, too, and it is WONDERFUL!  I have to be careful with it though because it has aspertame in it.  I couldn't tell you the last time my kids had something with "real" sugar in it - except when their Nana sneaks it to them.  

Veritee, the Watoto chior does perform in the UK, but I'm not sure what states.  They also perform in Germany, Isreal, Argentina, and a whole list of places that have no slipped my aging mind.  I'd never heard of them either, but was not disappointed that I went.  Also, I am so terribly sorry about the loss of your mother.

Kids here ended up with a 5-day weekend due to snow days on Thursday and Friday, and Martin Luther King, Jr. day on Monday.  We had school Thursday, some on Friday, and will still have school on Monday.  I know, I'm mean .  We'll take our "extra" days when the weather is above -12F and it's sunny.  Our #6 is so fair skinned that her cheeks and nose got wind-burned just from going from the house to a warm car, then to a building, back to a warm car, and into the house. She was outside less than 30 seconds each time.  We've been putting Carmex on it, but does anyone know of something else that will work? 

Oh, yes, by the way, do you all remember a month ago when we called Doc and told her that Mini needed another prescription for her Kaletra?  Lo and behold, we got it yesterday - yes, yesterday!  Thank goodness I'd already found an "old" prescription for it that was still good.  I think someone is drugging the doctors over there - they've all lost their minds.

Queen, I think I've missed something and I apologize.  You and your sister are renting a house, yes?  And now the landlord wants to sell it.  Is he selling it as a rental property, or will you have to leave?  I do agree that he probably has no intention of fixing anything that doesn't "show up" in the appraisal or the inspection.  I know the people we bought our house from didn't and we got totally screwed.  Have you found a new place to go yet?  I know that you said you liked the place and you haven't lived there that long.  Good luck with everything - sounds like a huge headache on your end. 

Sheri, don't worry about addressing everyone individually.  I don't think anyone gets upset - I know I don't. 

Christy, hun, what can I say.  It seems like when it rains it pours.  What exactly are the teachers worried about with Robert's handwriting?  Isn't he only in kindergarten?  Are they thinking fine motor stuff or is he just practising to become a doctor?

Well, ladies, it's early and it's cold.  My nose is stuffy, but runny, if that makes sense, and I'm coughing a storm.  I need to have a breathing treatment, but the machine is loud and the last thing I need is to wake up the kids before 6am.  Ladies, stay WARM and safe.

Mum

[BT65]

Morning ladies,

Queen, I know who B.I.G. is.  I remember when he got shot.  And I also knew about the law not solving his or Tupac's cases.  I think they're probably getting paid off.  Or they could have even been involved.  That's just my opinion of course.

Mum, try bag balm on your little one's nose.  I believe it's also called udder cream.  It's what they use on cow's udders when they become dry and cracked.  I always found it in the drug store, though I can't remember if it was by the lotion or the diaper rash stuff.  I used that on my daughter's diaper rashes and it was the only thing that worked.  It's really good stuff. 

In a little while I'm going over to my grandkids' house.  Their "mom" wants to go grocery shopping and needs someone to watch them.  I don't blame her for wanting to go without them.  They're at the age now where they'd probably want everything.  I'm going to be taking them the stuff from my sister in Phoenix, and the couple little things I got them while out there.  It should be nice.

It's actually 13F here right now.  It snowed last night though.  I don't know how much snow we've gotten so far this year, but I think it's already way more than we got all of last winter.  Oh well, that's life.  You ladies have a good day.

[camille07]

Happy New Year Ladies- it's been some time since I posted. 2008 was a year of changes for me and hard times.  I'm in a really good place now emotionally, physically, and financially.  2009, I believe, is my best year so far.  I see there are new faces and would just extend a big hug and hello. I have a bit of catching up but I'm going to start reading through this thread.

hugs,

Camms

[vivyt]

Hey Camms! You look really good in your picture. It's nice to hear from you!

Queen- I want to see Notorious too. So is Rey replacing Sexy???

Betty- Wow! What are you going to do to celebrate the "warm-up" ? LOL Can you feel the difference between a negative temp and a positive? Have fun with the grandkids.

Mum- Look at you with all the days off. That's the one thing about California, we don't get snow days.

Veritee- Don't worry about ranting. If this is where you have to do it then go for it.

If there is anyone else I forgot....sorry.

Today Vivian is finally getting her hair cut. The groomer at the vet has been out on maternity leave so she has not had a haircut in a long time and it is past time. I thought I could wait till February but I think it is driving her crazy. I like to have her hair cut when I leave her at daycare because she gets to play before and and after. When I take her to a regular groomer she has to sit in a cage and I hate that. I told them I want her in and out today, so we shall see.

I have laundry to do but I might save it for tomorrow. I don't know what I am going to do today. Maybe just be lazy.

Have a good day everyone!

[camille07]

Well-  I just finished reading through everyone's post.

Queen-  Belated Birthday to you.   I'm glad you had a good one.  My 40th is coming up in a few months and I'm wondering "what to do".

Betty-  Sounds like things are working out now that your living free of the white trash neighbors....busy with school too.

Veritee-  It sounds like you've had a really rough time and I'm sorry for your loss.  It sounds like years of pain have really taken a toll.  But those years are the past and it's time to move forward.  Don't be defeated by negative thinking for the future.  Your daughter is still very young and can still have a good relationship to with her.  It may not be easy and it will take work.  I had a close friend who's daughter absolutely despised her because of the past.  But through changing her victim mentality (as she puts it) and determination she was able to build a new relationship with her daughter.  There's always hope. 

Win-  Oh boy can I relate to your frustration at the clinic.  About  two months ago I had started meds.  I started feeling itchy and I knew something was wrong but I knew it was not the meds.  I was spending a lot time with a friend with was also itching but he had  been afflicted for months before.  So I started checking online and I was sure it was scabies.....yuck.  But my doctor told me it wasn't.  Then my Id doctor told me it wasn't.  My friend went to his doctor and he said if was dry winter skin???  If you had seen the marks you would have thought his doctor was insane.  Then  about a month  his itching got so bad I said,  "we're going to the ER today and getting to the bottom of this."  As it turns out, he was diagnosed with scabies and treated along with myself. I had just moved into my new cottage and had to clean everything...and this could have been prevented much earlier.  It was beyond frustrating and time consuming. Oh and did I mention 'ewwwwww'!

Well hope you all enjoy the rest of this day.

Hugs to you all  Christy, viv, netta and anyone else I missed.

Camms

[cjc]

Christy, hun, what can I say.  It seems like when it rains it pours.  What exactly are the teachers worried about with Robert's handwriting?  Isn't he only in kindergarten?  Are they thinking fine motor stuff or is he just practising to become a doctor?


Mum

      Minismum, that was really funny. I think he is practicing for becoming a doctor     Really I think his fine motor skills are fine, he just writes very sloppy.                                                           Not much going on , just sitting around broke since unemployment didn't send me my card yet .  Oh well, maybe  tuesday.                        Have a great day ladies. Camms, great to hear from you.    Cristy

[Winiroo]

Snow, they make sugar-free Dove chocolate, too, and it is WONDERFUL! 

Sugar free chocolate usually makes people poop too. Sugar alcohol is the culprit I think.

[minismom]

Good Monday morning from the frozen northern mountains.  I look out my window and all I see is white, white, white.  It's beautiful, but very short lived.  Later this week, we're getting into the 40's, a warm up of 52 degrees !  Then, all I will see is brown, brown, brown...mud (YUCK!).  I checked our forecast on accuweather and we're supposed to get a dusting at 9am and 9pm.  I'd thought about bugging out of dance class, but now I won't have to.  Thank goodness for 4 wheel drive.

And, you all know how I feel about TV - I HATE it!  Well, guess what?  I turned it on to hear the weather Friday night and it went capooey!  YEAH!!!  Although, I'm not happy that it's only 13mths old - 1mth older than the warrenty.   The kids still get to watch a night time movie on the computer and Hubby can watch the shows he'll just DIE without on the internet. 

Andrea, schools have been out since last Wed. and not sure if they'll cancel tomorrow or not.  We've had school, amid the groans of our kids.  We'll take "weather" days when it's sunny and warm. 

Camms, that happened to a friend of mine when they adopted their baby from Guatamala.  The doctor said it wasnt' scabes and gave them a medication that scabes actually thrive on!  She finally went the ER route, too, and that's when it got properly diagnosed. 

Winni, Mim doesn't seem to have problems with the sugar alcohol or splenda - just aspertame.  Of course, she poops all the time anyway, so honestly, who would know? 

Christy, you should see Mim's handwriting.  We're teaching her how to type, it's so bad...lol!  Our #5 (nearly 6yrs old - kindergarten) has a weak grip that makes his letters look wavy.  We got him fatter pencils, didn't help.  Then, we got him triangle pencils, and those have helped some.  Also, we give him a piece of black construction paper and a white crayon.  We tell him to color dark (which he can only do if he presses hard and grips the crayon tightly), then color light (he has to change his grip).  We do this as a "game" before his writing assignments and it has made a difference.  Maybe something you could do at home and see if it helps.

Ladies, I need to feed my army and get started with the day.  I have laundry calling my name and it's too cold for everyone to be running around nekked.   Have a great Monday and remember not to check the mail - it won't be coming.

Much love to you all!
Mum

[BT65]

Morning ladies,

It's a bit hard to write, since reading about the passing of Kate in Living With.  Damn, life sucks sometimes, really bad.  Life ends with some people before it should.  I'm very saddened.  Anyway..

Camms, it's great to hear from you.  Scabies, aye?  Yuck.  Glad you got them cleared up.  The white trash neighbors haven't moved yet.  My landlord said they should be gone by the end of March.

Andrea, how did Vivian's haircut look?

Cristy, I hope you get your card tomorrow.

Mum, did you try the bag balm? 

Today I'm supposed to meet my best friend for lunch.  It's sunny here, but we're supposed to be getting lake snow.  No warm-ups for us for a long while (probably not 'til spring).  I hope you ladies have a good day.

[keepingfaith]

Hey Ladies,

Just checking in. I had a great weekend. Me and DH went out to eat saturday. We had a great time. The weather here has been up and down. Today it will be 60. Last week it was 18 in the morning. We had to work to day.

BT- what happpened to Kate. Did she just die from HIV related illnesses. Every time I read that someone has passed on from this illness i just get so scared.  How old was she?

Snow- How's it going. I haven't seen you on facebook or myspace in a while.

[minismom]

I  came in and read that Kate had died and rushed over to LW.  I couldn't write anything else and locked myself in the bathroom.  The kids were supposed to only have a break, but after reading it, I cancelled school for the rest of the day.  We don't cancel for holidays or snow, but we'll cancel so I can mourn in the bathroom for an hour. 

I'm really worried about her brother, Matthew.  He has Asperger Syndrome (a form of autism) and Kate took care of him while they were growing up.  He's a music teacher, but they really depended on one another.  He would send our #2 (who also has AS) Spiderman comic books.  I know he's so lost right now - I hope someone is there to help him.

I thought I could post more, but I can't.  It's just a very sad day for the entire forum.

Mum

[Queen Tokelove]

Evening Everyone----

OMG, Kate passed..... Geez, another lovely soul gone. It seems like when it rains it pours. My friend Jeff's sister had gone into cardiac arrest just like week. They had to induce a coma thinking it would help her body heal itself or something to that effect. Jeff told me on Saturday she never came out of the coma and that she is brain dead. Machines are keeping her body alive but her brain functions are dead so to me she has passed. Wow, I am just so blown away by this......

Snow..snow..and more snow. And I am freaking tired of shoveling. I did last night and the snow was deep as hell again today....WTH? I see I have some questions to answer here. Rey, is the new guy but we are not in a relationship, I guess you can say we are friends who are attracted to each other. Of all places to meet him, I met him on MySpace. We met in person the Sunday before my birthday and had seen each other up until Thursday. I haven't heard from him since Friday though but that's cool with me. And to answer someone's question, yeah Sexy is still around. We usually talk once or twice a week by phone or I see him once a week. He came over today..... Now there is a 3rd guy but we haven't met yet, just been chatting on Yahoo. He lives a couple of hours away. Hmmm, what shall I call him...Orlando it is. He wants to come visit me. I am still thinking on it...I seem to be leaning toward Puerto Rican men which is what Rey and Orlando are. Not that I mind, I have been with black men most of my life so I don't mind the change..... I'm giddy from all the attention but I refuse to rush into anything. And I am leaving my options open...

Other than that, not much going on.....lol

[cjc]

I read about Kate's passing and have to admit, I sat here and cried. I did not know her well but I know she was a very nice lady and it made me sad to know she was gone.                                                            Not much going on, I have been up since around 4  , finally got out of bed at 5 and here I am.                                        Queen, you go girl, 3 fellas.  You are a beautiful, wonderful lady and deserve all the attention you want.                                                                                             Damnit, I keep finding duds. I started talking to one I meet off of poz personals and we were really clicking but then he told me he has HepC and HIV type 2. I am not really worried about the HEp C but the HIV 2 is gonna put a stop to the whole thing. Several people On LW(I made a thread asking for info about Type 2) gave me some good places to go to research it and from what I understand, it is very hard to treat so I am gonna have to find a nice way to tell him , No Thank you. I asked him how he managed to catch a type of HIV that is most common in Africa and he said he had HIV 1 and it mutated. Which I think is bullshit, everything I read says you start out with this strain, it does not mutate from HIV1. Oh well.                                                                                  WE got a light dusting of snow. Not even enough to cover the ground but enough for people around here to act like fools when they drive.                                                                            Poor Camms, I would hate to have scabies, I'm glad they finally diagnosed it correctly and you got rid of it. BTW, I love your profile picture, you are so pretty.                                                   Betty, I hope you are staying inside safe and warm. Thanks for your reply in my LW thread, I am not gonna risk catching HIV2 from that man , no matter how much I liked him. He even liked Tarantulas . Thanks Minismum, We have some construction paper and I will try your suggestion with him. Mostly he has problems with his spacing and writing very sloppy but I think he will be fine. He is really sick so we probably won't make the meeting tomorrow.                     Guess I better go. Hope everyone has a warm and safe day.     Cristy

[tendai]

Hie ladies

Gosh its awful about Kate. Man...

Snow - I'll definitely be watching Rock Bama onTV today. They're broadcasting live at 6pm our time.  It is pretty exciting...i hope it wont be too exciting for the wrong reasons. fingers crossed.  I had to laugh, your poor SO being assaulted in his sleep, sure u dint have any anger issues yu havent dealt with? 

Queen - i'd imagined you hurling Lucifer into the snow like a protester would throw a brick at riot police shields  Hope your man's leg recovers soon. 3 guys, girl u on a roll..

veritee - i'm so sorry about your mom. may she rest in peace. and i can imagine how awful it must have been for u raising your daughter practically alone. i have a sister whose husband works in a neighbouring country and only gets to see him once a year when he comes for christmas. i was amazed when she said their son had no problem recognising his dad like he was always there. at least u got the feelings out

Camms - great picture. good to know things are going well with you

Betty - i dont know how u guys survive in those temperatures...My place has no ceiling, its built with these concrete slabs used to build security walls around here so theres gaps between the top of the wall and the asbestos roof stuffed with paper. Anyway i only got 2 more weeks left then im out of there.

Mum - i watched a performance by these deaf children from South Africa, talking or signing about how how they lost their mother to AIDS.  It was really touching. And rather depressing. I hate to be reminded that i could die from it one day regardless of the medication and all.

i feel totally shitty today. i keep waking up with bites all over me. could be spiders or something, they dont look like mosquito bites, they're too big and they itch like mad.  plus i got this rash in my armpit which i had thought was pre-menstrual but i've had it for weeks and weeks and it also itches like mad. throw in some heartburn, weird shooting pains in my fingers and a painful newly braided scalp and its fun-time. wish my boss had some elixir hidden away in his bag, i'd love him forever.  need a good scrubbing both inside and out
on a more hopeful note our stupid leaders are meeting for more "talks" again. yeah right, they probably scared that if they dint have anything sorted by the time Obama is sworn in they'll miss out or something idiots

later ladies

[camille07]

Queen,Giddiness is good.  You deserve all the attention.

Camms

[BT65]

Morning ladies,

Keeping, I believe Kate had kidney failure.  She'd been ill for months.

Queen, 3 men?  Wow, how do you handle all of them?   You go.  I hope you have fun with each one of them.

Cristy, I wouldn't believe that guy about the HIV1 mutating into the HIV2 either.  It sounds like he's desperate to find someone and is willing to tell them anything.  You deserve much better than that.

Tendai, please take care of your rash and bites.  I hate being itchy.  I didn't know you don't have a roof.  I hope you get to move very soon; I'm sure you're anxious as well.

It's 4F here this morning.  At least it's not below 0.  I'm supposed to go to a friend's to watch the swearing-in of Obama at noon.  I also have to go to my school to get the biology homework from last week that I missed.  Which means I'll probably be doing that when I get home from my friend's (in between watching the goings-on in Washington).  I can't wait to see what Michelle's going to be wearing to the balls tonight.  I'm sure she won't disappoint.

I'm still very sad about Kate.  It's just not fair.  That makes the 3rd person I've known in the last 3 years to die who had AIDS.  They've all been tragic losses.  The world was much better with them in it.

Nothing planned other than the above.  You ladies have a good inauguration day.

[Queen Tokelove]

Hey Ladies-----

Funny thing isn't it? At the moment, it is 2 and a possible. It seems that I manage due to their schedules. At the moment, Sexy is off from work, he works construction----off season. Not sure where Rey works but knows he works a lot of split shifts. So, they pretty much get with me and I sit back and chill. I must admit that I am loving the attention...

Didn't do much today just peeped parts of the inauguration. And somebody should've told Aretha no on that big ass bow on the hat she was wearing...OMG!!!!! Was it just me or did Obama have a swagger to him when he was coming down the hallway? But I was grinning from ear to ear....No more Bush and dumb ass Bushisms of his.

I talked with Jeff roday and his sister has officially passed. They turned off the machine last night. I was invited to come to the funeral. I have never gone to one and really have nothing to wear. My wardrobe consist of jeans and t-shirts. I'm gonna have to work on that but I never really buy myself anything nice because I never go anywhere. And it's not like I could say no.

At the moment, I am waiting on my chicken breasts to thaw out so I can eat. I'll check back later.

[minismom]

Good evening, ladies!  My brain is still on emotional overload.  Jumpy and ill-focused.  I got up early to get supper ready (yeah, I know).  Anyway, got the roast, potatoes, carrots, onions, fresh garlic, and au joir sauce in the crockpot to cook for a good 10 hours.  Came up at noon to fix the kids' lunch and wondered why I wasnt' smelling the roast cooking.  Duh, I forgot to turn the crockpot on!  I turned it on and will turn it off before I go to bed.  Fridge it overnight, then put it low for a bit tomorrow.  Tonight, we had sandwiches. 

Other than that, laundry, breathing treatments (again), and the kids' school, I managed not to get much accomplished.  Maybe tomorrow.

Mum

[vivyt]

Good evening ladies. I am sorry to hear about the friend of all of you, Kate. I do not know who she is but it is definitely sad when someone with this disease dies. Was the kidney failrue due to HIV?

Well, today was a day filled with so much information! On Friday of last week we researched the history of the Presidential Inauguration and all the components of the day. We did all this in preparation to the actual inauguration and to complete a project. Today we watched it and the kids were pretty excited. It was cute how they would ask questions about things meant. During Obama's speech whenever people in the audience clapped so did some of the students. They didn't even know what they were clapping at. It was funny. Had my therapy session today and it was emotional so of course after I went and got a cheeseburger. I need to find another outlet.

Have a good evening ladies!!!!

[Veritee]

I just wanted to say to those of you in the US congratulations on your new president.

Our TV screens and news has been about nothing else

I do not know how you all feel about it, but for me whatever sort of president he proves to be as someone who was brough up in the 50s and while it was never that great here either re equality and race, even as a young girl I was always appalled at the violence this lead to in America - and of course I lived through our own race riots too when I lived in South London in the 1970s , and the end of apartheid and white rule in Africa so to have a black president feels like a milestone for the world to me.

Here they are calling today a new day for the world.
And something I never thought I would live to see.

Go Bama

Veritee

[Queen Tokelove]

Just popping in to say that someone should consider starting a new thread. We are past 100 posts...Yeah, I think Obama was on a lot of tv sets today. Change is good. I think I am about to go to bed. I am very tired....Night..

[BT65]

Consider this thread closed.  Please put all new comments in thread #53.  (thanks)