excessive Pre-cum - rubbing/frottage

[roma123]

Hi there

I was hoping you could assess my situation.

I’m a 23 year old UK guy and I met a guy and went on a few dates with him. Each time we ended up at his and engaged in mutual pleasuring / frottage - the last time I saw him was on October 18th. We did not engage in oral as I do not like giving/receiving oral. Now this guy pre-cums a lot and I know his pre-cum got on my anus (sorry to be blunt) - he did not penetrate me. 

Assuming this guy is positive, I was wondering whether him getting his pre-cum on my man hole / the pink flesh  (sorry to be so blunt) put me at risk of contracting HIV? I had minor cuts from shaving earlier on in the day, would pre-cum getting on any cuts cause infection?

I went to a clinic for a full STD test and they did a HIV test on me. The HIV test was different from the one I’ve usually done. I  have usually had a rapid HIV test in my past check ups where you get the result back immediately but with this HIV test I had to wait 15/20 mins to get my result. The blood result came back negative. I took the test on 15th November -  28 days after my last pre-cum encounter with the guy. 

I’ve been ill this past week - temperature, tongue ulcer, sore throat, coughing, sneezing and I am very congested - but my symptoms are clearing up quickly.

[RapidRod]

For HIV transmission to take place in sex it has to be unprotected penetrative anal or vaginal sex.

[jkinatl2]

RapidRod is right. There is absolutely NO risk for HIV in the situation you described.

[roma123]

Hi all

Just a of quick question;

If an individual is diagnosed with syphilis and they engage only in frottage what is the likelihood of acquiring HIV if pre cum were to come into contact with an open sore in say the bum region - not inside the anus - and mouth.

I've read syphilis actually raises the stakes in acquiring hiv however the only activity engaged in is frottage and maybe a little oral (no cum in mouth, precum possibly)with several people prior to diagnosis. No unprotected sex was ever involved in any of these instances at all.

I'm going to get tested regardless for HIV as it's been awhile.

Thanks

[Andy Velez]

Roma, having syphilis does increase vulnerability to HIV transmission, but only via unprotected vaginal and anal intercourse. Sexually those are the only confirmed risks for HIV transmission. HIV is a fragile virus and is not transmitted through frottage outside of the anus. Or through oral sex.

Getting tested regularly is a good idea to confirm your negative status and should include testing for all STDs by anyone who is sexually active.

Good luck to you. As far as HIV is concerned I expect you to test negative.
 

[roma123]

Hello

So a week ago I went on a great date with a guy (met on Tinder) and as some great dates go we ended up sleeping together  . I asked his status and he said negative - although he is rather promiscuous(he's had a sexual awakening apparently since he came out this year) he assured me he always uses protection. So as with anyone I date/ sleep with who is promiscuous/ hasn't had a recent test I treat them as positive until we test together.

Anyway, so he did oral on me. I don't do oral (bad gums as my dentist puts it). I had a fresh cut on my penis. He managed to cut his lip (blood) in the process (don't know how) - was there any blood risk there with it getting on my cut?

Also I suffer from terrible mouth ulcers (attractive I know) constantly - I have my darling mother to thank for that great inheritance. Any chance of any exposure of his blood on my mouth ulcers?

We did a lot of frottage, me rubbing against his backside and him against mine. I'm a bottom so naturally he rubbed himself against my backside, he didn't penetrate me unprotected (although he was starting to get carried away- stopped him). He had a lot of pre-cum so it got everywhere. He ended up pleasuring me with his pre-cum covered fingers, any chance of risk of pre-cum exposure if it got inside me? I've read that it's practically next to none.

We got down to the act. I bottomed. Pre-cum still around my anus. We used a condom and plenty of water based lube. He didn't ejaculate at all. Checked the condom afterwards - no tear (that would have been noticeable) and checked for holes (filled it with water) none that I could see.

I've been rather I'll since but I'm putting that down to the weather (it's taken a turn for the worst).

So I know I'm pretty much guessing no risk exposure with the above situation?

I test near enough every three months - last test was negative in August. I'll test again regardless as I know plenty of other STI's can be contracted.

[Jeff G]

Only post in this one thread and do not start another one no matter how long between visits or the subject matter . You can find this thread by going to your profile and selecting show own post and it will take you here .

Getting a blow job is not a risk for HIV even with a small cut, its not a risk . Rubbing and frottage are not risk for HIV . Please read this thread and you will see all your concerns have been addressed already . 

[roma123]

Hello,

So sticking to my original thread as per rules.

I’m 30 now and practice safe sex - protected anal and unprotected oral. I test every 6 months (all STIs)

I decided to bottom for a guy last night - it’s been awhile. We used latex condoms and lube. When he went to put the condom on he was starting to unroll it on his penis incorrectly so it touched his penis and then he realized and flipped it and put it on the right way - no risk I’m assuming with this scenario.

So the situation - its been awhile since I bottomed so not extremely comfortable for me to begin with but he managed at the very beginning of the act to penetrate me whilst he was errect. We’d engaged in a lot of foreplay so when we got around to the act we were both exhausted. The guy kept losing his errection whilst inside me and he managed to penetrate me several times with a semi-errection (verging on almost no errection), his penis was covered by the condom in both semi and non errected state when inside me. The condom was intact - no rips, no tears from I could tell. He did not ejaculate. I removed it from his penis after we gave up trying to have sex.

Was there any risk with a condom covered penis that lacked any form of errection being inside someone (e.g me being the bottom if the top had HIV).  I’ve seen a few scenarios posted about tops losing there errection with a condom on with no risks as long as the penis head remained covered so assume it would be the same for a bottom as long as the penis inside them was covered regardless of state (errect, flaccid, seminerrect)?

Possibly a silly post from me but since you do a fantastic job advising people with your exper knowledge and this scenario happened, I thought I’d ask.

[Jim Allen]

Hiya

I’m 30 now and practice safe safer sex - protected anal and unprotected oral. I test every 6 months (all STIs)

Glad to hear it although I made a small correction there.

See its safer sex as although HIV can not transmit through an intact latex condom and correct and consistent usage is key to preventing condom failure. The levels of protection for various STIs, depends greatly on differences in how the diseases or infections are transmitted.  Some infections (Not HIV) are transmitted primarily by skin-to-skin contact, like during viral shredding (Herpes) which may infect areas not covered by a condom ( Such as herpes, human papillomavirus [HPV] infection, syphilis, and chancroid).

Also of course on the practical side condoms can break, although when this happens its obvious 

So the situation - its been awhile since I bottomed so not extremely comfortable for me to begin with but he managed at the very beginning of the act to penetrate me whilst he was errect. We’d engaged in a lot of foreplay so when we got around to the act we were both exhausted. The guy kept losing his errection whilst inside me and he managed to penetrate me several times with a semi-errection (verging on almost no errection), his penis was covered by the condom in both semi and non errected state when inside me. The condom was intact - no rips, no tears from I could tell. He did not ejaculate. I removed it from his penis after we gave up trying to have sex.

Was there any risk with a condom covered penis that lacked any form of errection being inside someone (e.g me being the bottom if the top had HIV).  I’ve seen a few scenarios posted about tops losing there errection with a condom on with no risks as long as the penis head remained covered so assume it would be the same for a bottom as long as the penis inside them was covered regardless of state (errect, flaccid, seminerrect)?

Nothing that stands out as a HIV concern, although I would not recommend you keep doing this simply because of the risk of a condom slipping off and heading north bound, leaving you unprotected. 

When he went to put the condom on he was starting to unroll it on his penis incorrectly so it touched his penis and then he realized and flipped it and put it on the right way - no risk I’m assuming with this scenario.

Not a HIV concern, however next time if you've started putting it on the wrong way or you’re not sure then take it off and try again. Even if you have not  ejaculated (cum) there can still be semen (pre-cum), so it’s important to try again with a new condom. (This is mainly due to other easier to transmit STI's and if intercourse is with a cis-woman pregnancy risks)

All in All.

Nothing you mentioned here stood out as a HIV concern, keep testing as routine like you are and keep using condoms, correctly and with no exceptions for intercourse, in addition to what you are already doing seriously consider starting PrEP as an additional layer of protection against HIV

[roma123]

Hi Jim

Thanks for the quick response.

You’re correct, I should have said “safer”

Noted re: condom heading north for future scenarios. I don’t want to even think about how much fun (not) that would be trying to get it out let alone possible exposure. His penis was covered as I had the lovely job of removing the condom for him so no consom slipping into the abyss on this occasion and no ejagulate on his side either. No condom break or failure - still together after it was removed.

Re: new condoms. Noted. I wasn’t concerned by HIV with this scenario but I will ensure next time I play, that a new one is used - not keen on catching any other STI.

Re: prep. I would like to explore this however I’m living in Switzerland and the cost of prep is extortionate. However that being said, one can never be too sure with health and a lot of people are on prep here in the city I’m living in. I’ll speak to my GP about this when I see her next.

I will continue to stick to my 6 month routine and as mentioned above, explore prep as an extra measure of protection.

Thank you for answering my question and I appreciate all the time and effort you and the others on this forum put into answering questions

Wishing you a great day!

[Jim Allen]

Hiya,

You're welcome and sorry to hear about the PrEP

We have a similar situation in Ireland although in Ireland a lot of people import generic drugs at a fraction of the price.

Jim