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Author Topic: The first day after my test.  (Read 2336 times)

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Offline JustDrifting

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The first day after my test.
« on: May 27, 2020, 01:21:46 pm »
Today is the first day after testing positive. I honestly don’t know how to navigate this forum correctly but I’m just shooting in the dark hoping I do this correctly. Right now I feel like my body is floating and I don’t ever think it will come down. I’ve cried, I’ve prayed, I’ve cried and then prayed some more. I’m honestly just lost. Yesterday I went from suicidal thoughts to now finding online support groups. I guess I just don’t want to feel alone... so here is to the “ first day after “ .
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Offline Jim Allen

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Re: The first day after my test.
« Reply #1 on: May 27, 2020, 01:54:41 pm »
Hiya,

Sorry to hear about the pain you are going through.

Know that you are not alone, being newly diagnosed can be a lot to digest and we have been through that. Asides from reaching out for online support also talk to your doctor about how you are feeling and the possibility of face to face support at some stage. 

You had a positive diagnosis yesterday so things must feel pretty raw.

How did you test positive BTW?

Did the doctor mention any lab results like CD4 or Viral load and have they discussed your treatment options and/or arranged follow-up appointments for you?

Best, Jim
« Last Edit: May 27, 2020, 02:13:34 pm by Jim Allen »
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Offline JustDrifting

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Re: The first day after my test.
« Reply #2 on: May 27, 2020, 05:15:00 pm »
The doctor didn’t mention it. I took the two test yesterday one a mouth swab and the other a finger prick and both resulted in a positive result. I’m unaware about anything pertaining to a viral load. I just definitely knew I needed to reach out for support and after looking this was the first actual group I found. Thank you for letting me know I’m not alone! I felt like 25 would be an interesting age for me and it definitely has been so far.
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Offline Matths

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Re: The first day after my test.
« Reply #3 on: May 27, 2020, 07:36:21 pm »
Hi, you certainly found a great place here in this forum. I was diagnosed a little bit more than a year ago, and I recall that situation as if it happened yesterday. I recall having contemplated suicide as well, for literally 10-15 minutes, but then I forced myself to calm down and be rationale about this new situation. And started to reach out to 2 people I knew were positive for 20+ years, and that really made a huge difference for me. The experience to know people who went through what I was going through, and who survived and actually life their life to the fullest. That was the key experience for me. And then I started to inform myself and I have become so much more educated in this past year. Today, I understand that being HIV positive is a life changer, but it’s in our hands to turn our life into a good direction. So, welcome here amongst friends! You will find it rewarding and always reach out. It helps! Best matth
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Offline Jim Allen

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Re: The first day after my test.
« Reply #4 on: May 28, 2020, 04:10:18 am »
Quote from: JustDrifting on May 27, 2020, 05:15:00 pm
The doctor didn’t mention it. I took the two test yesterday one a mouth swab and the other a finger prick and both resulted in a positive result. I’m unaware about anything pertaining to a viral load. I just definitely knew I needed to reach out for support and after looking this was the first actual group I found. Thank you for letting me know I’m not alone! I felt like 25 would be an interesting age for me and it definitely has been so far.

You're welcome.

Look a reactive antibodies test, I can understand this can be a shock, distressing and a lot to digest.

However, also keep in mind a reactive antibodies test is not a diagnosis, they are highly sensitive but not very specific. False reactive results do happen, so before presuming anything follow-up with your doctor for confirmation testing to confirm your HIV status.

In the meantime try not to overthink things too much.  If your diagnosis is confirmed then getting onto treatment will be important and your doctor should help you by recommending what treatment combination will best suit you.

There is some easy to digest information in the POZ lessons here: https://www.poz.com/basics/hiv-basics/newly-diagnosed

Until you have had further testing completed and can share the results, I am going to ask you to only post in this one thread. Feel free to post any question you have here.

Best, Jim
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HIV 101 - Everything you need to know
HIV 101
Read more about Testing here:
HIV Testing
Read about Treatment-as-Prevention (TasP) here:
HIV TasP
You can read about HIV prevention here:
HIV prevention
Read about PEP and PrEP here
PEP and PrEP

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