too much worry

[one in a million]

I have been having a great deal of worry over an incident that happened Jan 7, 2006. I will not go into detail because it has been covered many time and has been said to be a non-risk incident. I'm married and have a child so I should know better. The incident that occurred involved one of my coworkers and there has not been a day go by that i have not regretted it.
To try and make sure as possible nothing would happen to my wife or baby. I have really tried to be tested and cleared thourghly. I was tested for hiv at 14 days, 123 days, and finally at 170 days (ALL NEGATIVE). I was also tested for other stds at that initial 14 day visit. My problem has been that every day for the past 7 months I have had symptoms and continue to do so. It seems like it goes from one thing to another, I know you have stated that symptoms mean nothing in the way of hiv, but they have been very difficult to ignore. 1st: became ill for 1 day with temp 3 weeks after the incident. 2nd: 6 week point had discomfort in throat that last around 2 weeks. after that I had discomfort in my left side for several months. What has really been worrying me lately is I have been getting tingling and burning senasations throughtout my body (not penis) and have had 2 small red rashes on my arm where it bends at the elbow (these mOst recent things are what is occurring now). I know the mind can really play tricks on you, but I have never been a hypochondriac (but I have never cheated either until now). I don't want to continue to waste resources, but I also want to be safe. Can I truly move on? I have read alot of the posts over the past months and just wanted the expert moderator opinions. Could I still be having symptoms after all this time? Do I need any more testing? Please answer Ann, Andy , and Jonothon if possible. I just want to stop the "crazy" as Jonathon says, but continue to worry. I have also been going to a psychologist as you have stated for others with such fears. PLEASE LET ME KNOW IF THAT 170 DAY TEST 100% ACCURATE.   

[RapidRod]

You are NEGATIVE. Period.....

[Andy Velez]

One, you have more than conclusively tested negative for HIV. You ARE HIV negative. Period. End of story.

Sinner though you maybe, (like the rest of us), HIV is not lurking secretly somewhere in your body waiting to show up and punish you for having strayed.

The best thing you can do for all concerned is to see clearly what occured, take a deep breath and let it go. Lugging around your guilt is poisonous to your relationship and your life in general. So quit that particular self indulgence. No kidding.

This is not an HIV situation so get on with your life!

Cheers,

[Ann]

there has not been a day go by that i have not regretted it.

One,

It sounds to me like you got a blowjob, which you yourself admit is no risk. You have conclusively tested negative over a no-risk situation, and I suspect what I quoted above is the reason you can't let this go. You're literally regretting yourself sick. Stop it.

You don't need further testing and by the sounds of it, you didn't need testing in the first place. What you need to do is go and get a complete physical with your doctor and find out what, if anything, is wrong with you. Whatever is going on, it isn't about hiv and you could be missing something serious by focusing on something that isn't there.

Dump the guilt overboard before it sinks your ship. You are hiv negative and all the guilty feelings in the world won't change that fact.

Ann

[one in a million]

Hello,
I very much appreciate the words of encouragement and feel much better. I was hoping to ask you a few more questions (I realize I'm probably being a pest). The prickling and burning sensation (does not last but a 2nd or two) I have been feeling recently could that possible be PN due to hiv(occurring in feet as well)? 
I know you guys have always been very accurate in your assesments of results for peoples tests. There have been a few times when I thought somebody might actually be positive after a few of the follow-ups. But you guys stuck to your guns, my question I guess is have you ever been wrong in a situation and somebody later tested positive?
I guess that if this prickly sensation that comes andes continues, I will go get tested for other stds again, even though I have been tested once. Should I get one last hiv test or let it go ? (there is alot of anxiety when you get that test)
Thanks I really appreciate your advice nad hope I'm not overstepping my bounds, I realize you guys are busy.

[Morgan]

One in a million,

Symptoms related to hiv infection occur 2-4 weeks post exposure.  They come all at once, and go all at once a week or so later.

PN is not an indication of primary hiv infection. 

You are hiv negative.  Period.

Morgan

[one in a million]

Thanks for the information! Must be stress and worry!
P.S: I really found your site useful and found the consistancy in answers a great help!

[Joe K]

Hey One,

I've been where you are and trust me, it's your guilt that's haunting you, so take the suggestions to get a full physical from your GP and then talk with someone about this or you will be chasing "demons" for years.  It's not in your body, it's in your head.

[one in a million]

True , I guess it is probably in my head! I"m going to finally get on with my life and quit obssessing obout the miniscule probability I've contracted hiv or something else. When this happened 7 monthes ago, I pretty much stopped everyting I've always done, I worked out for probably ten years and just stopped! My wife says I look like crap and I'm not even the same happy person I've always been. Starting tommorrow I am going to go work out and start my life back up again. I'm  going to stop thinking about every tingle and pain I get and realize that it is what it is, your every day typical sh*t! I've obssessed over this and made it into something it really isn"t! What a waste of 7 months of my life! It truly couldn't be any worse having a disease than being mentally unstable! Thanks for all the help and time! You guys truely have a saints patients.
P.S: I just wanted to thank Ann, Andy, Morgan, Killfoile, and Rapid Rod for taking the time to help people who worry to much. You really help people who don't get the answers from people who should know the facts and end up scarying people! (I had a doctor at a clinic tell me he was 95% sure I didn't have hiv after a non-risk incident (per Ann and everybody), this was after he tested me at 2 weeks and I went back to him at 6 weeks because of a sore throat and he looked at it said it appeared irritated but I didn't have thrush), he told he was 95% sure at the six week visit, after telling me I was fine at 2 weeks (I didn't know hiv tests had a window, oh but I do now)!  thanks A-hole.
 

[one in a million]

Sorry about the sarcasm (in other thread-I will stick to my own), it was stupid considering I have my own worries and fears. My apologies. Will not happen again- guaranteed!

[Andy Velez]

With regard to "controlling your thoughts," I have never found that to be a successful effort. Thoughts and feelings just come and go as they will. Actually, attempting to control them or push them away is in my experience a certain way to make them turn into crazy glue and stick to you unrelentingly.

What I recommend is that when you have an anxeity-provoking thought or feeling, just notice it, take a breath and let it go. Then another different one comes and another and if can just get yourself going with the changing flow you'll be fine.

I think we are now in agreement that HIV is not your issue even though your mind may still come up with scary thoughts about it for who knows how long.

Inflicting endless penance on yourself is an indulgence. The best thing you can do for yourself, your wife and your family is to get on with your life. No kidding.

Cheers,

[one in a million]

New question: Do the oraquick rapid hiv tests cover hiv-2? Asking based on trip to Amsterdam in 2001. Had orasure rapid hiv test in 2006 do to my earlier fear (actually 3 tests). Tested negative on these tests. Tested in United States if it matters (probably doesn't)...just wanted to confirm that these tests would have detected hiv-2 if had contacted....thanks
Had not worried since my last post, but than read article in paper about hiv on red light district.

[Ann]

one,

If you were infected in 2001, your test in 2006 would have caught the intection no matter if it was hiv 1 or 2 and yes, the orasure rapid checks for both.

You do not have hiv.

Ann