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Main Forums => Someone I Care About Has HIV => Topic started by: supportive on August 08, 2009, 02:15:36 pm

Title: husband just tested positive
Post by: supportive on August 08, 2009, 02:15:36 pm
My husband was just tested positive in june 09..This was very upsetting as we have been together for almost 17yrs. After the shock i decided that what matters most is trying to get him back on his feet..He has had pneumonia for over 6mo. All the drs kept giving him antibiotic for the pneumonia but never getting better, just worse. Finally after being hospitalized he found out that his condition was aids..We did meet with the specialist which gave us the  CD4 count=6 and VL 42985.. They decided to put him on the Atripla immediately instead of waiting for the gene test..hes been on the Atripla for 2 weeks..Im just worried that they caught this too late, can anyone give me more information on this? And what are the chances of him pulling out of this state?
Title: Re: husband just tested positive
Post by: Ann on August 08, 2009, 02:47:16 pm
Hi Supportive, welcome to the forums.

Your husband has a very good chance of being ok, especially now that he's on medications for the hiv infection. There are plenty of members here who have come back from low numbers coupled with PCP pneumonia and are living healthy lives. It won't happen overnight, it takes time, but it sounds like he's in good hands now.

Hopefully some of our members who have been through this themselves will come in and tell you their stories. If you do a search on PCP you'll probably find some yourself. (there's a link to the site search engine in the left-hand column of any forum page)

You should read through the Lessons (http://www.aidsmeds.com/articles/Introduction_4702.shtml) section of this website, as well as the forums. Feel free to come back into this thread to ask any questions that may arise during your reading.

Hang in there - now that your hubby's getting the proper care and medications, there's no reason to think that he won't pull through this in time. Keep us posted!

Ann


Title: Re: husband just tested positive
Post by: webontheweb on August 09, 2009, 08:08:45 am
I hope this helps.  I was once on your shoes, my parnter was sick sick not getting better and then he was  hopsitalised with pcp and a cd4 count of 10.  He got better and now has a cd4 of 457.  It did take months for him to get better, but HE DID!
It was scary times for sure, but we got through it.  Saw a counseler which I highly rec.  Your life has changed now.
Title: Re: husband just tested positive
Post by: havetohavefaith on August 09, 2009, 10:44:32 pm
Just wanted to let you know I'am also in your shoes.
Last year ( march 08) my husband got a + HIV diagnosis after being in the hospital for a week. They also put him on Atripla immediatly...although to be honest we dont know what his #'s where then....they never gave them to us, even when he would go for follow ups they Dr.s would say all is fine see ya in 6 months.
Anyway we moved and got a GREAT Dr. he just got his new #'s this past week and his viral load is still undetectable, his CD4 was 304 and all the other tests they did looked great..... The Dr.s even told us just how very pleased they were, and that my husband is very healthy. The only thing is he did have a hard time on the Atripla for the first 2 -4 weeks....I wont lie it was TERRIBLE...BUT they have helped him and done thier job and he has not had a problem since....the only thing is about 1/2 hr after taking his meds he is OUT and I think the house could be burning and he would not wake up.

We have been together 17years ..... married 15 of them  and know exactly when he contracted HIV. Does your husband know when he was exposed?

The first 6 months were very hard.....I went through major depression for both of us ......his health, worrying about my health, worrying about our children, the betrayal all the emotions ......it has not been easy, but our relationship has never been stronger.....but it has taken alot of work too.

If you want to chat please feel free to PM me with your email .

This site has been SUCH a help.....I dont post often, but there have been a few wonderful people I have gone back and fourth with on email who have given me such great advice and inspiration.
Best of luck,
I wish your husband a speedy and healthy recovery and strength for you as you get through this time.

~Julie
Title: Re: husband just tested positive
Post by: Ann on August 10, 2009, 07:06:54 am
Just thought I'd point out that Supportive won't be able to access the Private Message (PM) function until she posts on the forum three times.

Ann
Title: Re: husband just tested positive
Post by: havetohavefaith on August 10, 2009, 10:06:24 pm
Oh I'am sorry I did not realize this.

~J
Title: Re: husband just tested positive
Post by: supportive on August 19, 2009, 04:00:39 pm
well here's a update. wont have cd4 count til next week, but on Aug 12th he went back in the hospital and diagnosed with CMV along with the pcp thats still there, white cell count at 1. They did give him booster shots to stimulate the white cells and it worked now up to 20. On top of all that he had a infected bedsore on his tailbone and herpes. He just got out of the hospital yesterday and still havin some issues, stomache pain, aches all over, fatigue..I just wonder how much a body can take??Very worried..Still on oxygen at home and at least 15 different meds. For the cmv they put him on valcyte and he started that yesterday.. This is alot for me to cope with but im doin my best and trying to be supportive to him..Need some insight right now
Title: Re: husband just tested positive
Post by: skeebo1969 on August 19, 2009, 04:54:34 pm



    Supportive,

      Sounds like you have a lot on your plate right now.  I do hope your husband pulls out of this ok...    Remember to take care of yourself too...  stay well and keep us updated on the hubby.
Title: Re: husband just tested positive
Post by: Assurbanipal on August 19, 2009, 05:56:28 pm
Hi Supportive

If the doctors are willing to let him out of the hospital, that's probably a good sign.

It does take quite a while to get over pneumonia though.  I had similar experiences about 3 years ago and when I got out of the hospital still needed oxygen support and really couldn't do much but sleep.  I remember sleeping 12-14 hours a night plus a morning nap and an afternoon nap.  One day that first week out of the hospital I had someone come by from work to go over all the projects that I left behind -- he stayed an  hour and a half and I slept for 23 hours the next day!  I was too tired to even talk on the phone for a couple of weeks.

But over time it got better -- stopped the naps, got over the thrush and eventually got rid of the oxygen machine.  After a month and a half even went back to work (a desk job) half time -- although in retrospect I should have waited another couple of weeks.

Three years later, life is not perfect, but it's manageable -- put in 6 miles on the stepper this morning...  :)

You can see a summary below in my signature line -- there's more in my bio (if you click on someone's user name you can see their bio).

Well, I've gone on a bit, but hope it is cheering for you to hear a story of how things got better starting from pneumonia and oxygen support.  It is wonderful that you are there for him.

Best wishes
Assurbanipal

Title: Re: husband just tested positive
Post by: havetohavefaith on August 20, 2009, 12:06:50 am
I'am glad you updated , I have been wondering how things were.
Glad to hear your husband is home....I know how overwhelming it can be, but one of the other posters mentioned....take care of yourself too!!

My husband was in the hospital for a week and then when he came home was off his feet for about a month. I thought the same thing....just how much can the body handle...he had lost so much weight
( he is not a big man typically 170, so 15 lbs looked like ALOT) he would do NOTHING but sleep, looking back it was kinda sureal....like I was watching this all happen, and to this day dont know how we made it through it ...BUT we did ....and had no ounce of support as we still have not told anyone, but the Atrilpa has done what its supposed to and his recent numbers were good (although we did not have anything prior to go by)
Last week he was sick....we both caught the swine flu as it is running rampid where we are....and that did knock him on his keaster....BUT he also ALWAYS over does it with work too "( like 80hrs a week) so that contributed to it.
But I guess after all this rambling , I just wanted to say It might take some time, but I hope your husband rebounds and makes a full recovery.....just get over this hurdle. I know its super scary,draining ect to take care of a sick husband ( men are always more needy any way .....LOL) but take care and know that I will be thinking of you both. I'am always around if you want to chat.
~J
Title: Re: husband just tested positive
Post by: supportive on September 06, 2009, 12:30:42 pm
Update, we went on the 27th of August to a dr appt for the follow up of the hospital stay and we had some suprising news.. CD4 count went from 6 to 138 and viral load went from 42985 to 3000. Hes still on Atripla, and responding very well to it..Dr was even suprised that his CD4 count went up so quickly.. So hopefully we are thru the woods for now. As for me, i wasnt sleeping at all, i guess just stressed out..Finally started sleeping again and its slowly starting to feel some what normal. Hes still trying to figure out how he got this, as we have been together for 17yrs and married for 15yrs. Both of us faithful. He has been a electrican for 30yrs. About 6-7yrs ago he remembers a house they were doing repairs in that when walking in you knew it was a drug house (needles everywhere). They avoided them. But its nothing for electricians to reach up into walls , attic and else where and get poked by nails or whatever, so he doesnt know for sure how he got this. No transfusions ever..Very confusing for him and well me too..But i myself am not focusing on that, i am focusing on getting him better..I do have to say its hard to be positive when things were that bad. But im glad i had this forum, and of course family and friends that you can trust..Will update soon
Title: Re: husband just tested positive
Post by: Ann on September 06, 2009, 02:34:17 pm
Supportive,

It's good that your husband's numbers are going in the right directions. He might find that his CD4s will level out for a while, but hopefully they will continue to climb.

Hiv is not transmitted from objects in the environment. Even with used needles, it doesn't happen. Hiv is transmitted through needle sharing, where a needle is shared immediately after use. When an injecting drug user uses, they pull a small  bit of blood back into the needle to ensure they have a vein. When they hand the needle directly over to another person, some traces of blood remaining in the needle will then be directly injected into the next person's bloodstream. A needle lying around for more than a few minutes is not going to contain viable hiv virus. (Hep C virus, maybe, but not hiv) In a medical setting, needle sticks happen immediately after exposure to the patient. Hiv transmission in a medical setting is very rare, despite needle-stick injuries being one of the most common work-related accidents in that field.

It's more likely that your husband was infected before your marriage. Any unprotected intercourse will have put him at risk - and yes, it could have been with a woman. And it is possible that he's been positive for that long without knowing. I've been positive for over twelve years and my numbers are good and I do not yet need meds. It could be that he was also fine for years and his numbers only took a dive in the past few years.

Have you been tested yet?

Ann
Title: Re: husband just tested positive
Post by: supportive on September 06, 2009, 11:03:00 pm
Yes, i have been tested and it came back negative. Which was a blessing because i couldnt even imagine both of us being sick like that. It was a emotional time as it was finding out about him. But the Dr said i should be tested every 6 months. I just dont understand how he has it and i dont, thats really confusing to be. Maybe you can explain that..Thankyou so much for your information as it helps to understand this.
Title: Re: husband just tested positive
Post by: Ann on September 07, 2009, 09:49:33 am
supportive,

There are theories out there about why some people seem to be immune to hiv infection. (And by the way, you're not the first person here who tested negative despite repeated exposure through unprotected intercourse with a positive partner.)

One is the repeated exposure theory. Click here (http://www.thebody.com/content/art29426.html) to read more.

Another is the plague theory. Click here (http://www.pbs.org/wgbh/evolution/library/10/4/l_104_05.html) and here (http://www.bioedonline.org/news/news.cfm?art=1635) to read more.

As long as you were tested three months after your last incident of unprotected intercourse, you can be confident that you are indeed hiv negative. The doctor is right about you having routine tests. I was with a negative man for eight years and he tested more frequently at first, and by the end of our relationship, it was less than once a year. His testing frequency went down as our confidence in what was and wasn't a risk went up. We were together for a year and a half before we discovered my hiv status and he didn't become infected either. It's more common for that to happen in couples where the woman is positive, because hiv is more difficult to transmit from a woman to man. But, it's not unheard of either for a woman to not become infected when the man is positive.

Ann
Title: Re: husband just tested positive
Post by: PRCR625 on September 18, 2009, 12:51:39 am
Hi Supportive!

Just read your posts. Sounds like you, Julie and myself are long lost sisters!! Almost the same situations.

If you look back at my post history you'll be able to read my story, it's been a long hard road.

But that which doesn't kill us makes us stronger.

I would love to get you into our circle...and I will try to post more often (Sorry Julie, I know I've been slacking!!)

Remember, you are not alone and things will get better.

God Bless,

Chris
Title: Re: husband just tested positive
Post by: supportive on September 30, 2009, 11:12:54 pm
Another update, things seem to be going pretty good on his recovery. Wbc seem to have stablized at 5 which is good, he get to return to work tomorrow Oct 1st. I feel very nervous about this, just worry too much i think. Hes been off work since june 22nd, he went from 140lbs to 163lbs and he looks healthy. His normal weight before all of this was about 185. Havent got cd4 and VL since the last posting and the dr said there is no need for one til late november. I just worry about alot of things,like the cold and flu season, cold weather and he does work out in it...Dr has recommended a flu shot, pneumonia shot in mid october and the swine flu shot when it becomes available. Still doin well with the atripla, he is on mepron for the pcp, valcyte for the cmv, and experinces thrush at times..So i guess its a wait and see thing on how he does at work, hope he does good and hope hes not going back too soon..just a worry wart..