Possible Anal Rape at Clinic

[JesusSuarez]

Respected Forumers

I need your help.

Please advise on what I should do.

I would take your word for it with no silly follow-up questions.

I was at a doctors clinic in London last week to take a rapid HIV test. While I was seated on a chair in the clinic, some random middle-aged guy came into the clinic because he wanted to use the toilet. He went straight to the toilet but along the way, he spotted me as I was seated alone. He scratched his dick area in front of me, and smiled at me. It freaked me out. Due to my anxiety, I tend to forget things so I cannot remember if I followed him into the toilet located at the back of the clinic (secluded), and then he raped me there or forced me to give him a blowjob. What I do know is that I was in the clinic for exactly 30 minutes (I timed it), and about 10 minutes was to see the doctor and another 15 minutes waiting outside for the result, which was negative. It was during this 15 minutes waiting time that this particular incident could have happened. When I got home, neither my pants nor my underwear was wet, has semen or blood stain in them. But I did have bad diarrhoea with faeces that seem to be bloodied when I passed it out at home, and my butt seems quite sore. I also don't recall speaking at all with this guy. 

If this guy has hiv and this event did happen, I am in big trouble. I want to move on from my HIV test but I had to come across this pervert. Now I don't know what to do. I don't know if I should take another HIV test. Sigh. I cannot sleep at night because I worry this guy might have done something to me which I cannot remember. I cannot remember if I was raped, had some anal sex, or even gave him a blowjob. It is freaking me out - what if any of this did happen? I fear that one of those incidents that I think I might have imagined actually turned out to be real.

Could someone help me make sense of this most recent incident? Do I need to take another HIV test?

I am riddled with anxiety.

Thank you for allowing me to share my thoughts here.

26-year-old male

[Andy Velez]

Jesus, I hardly know what to say about this story of yours. None of it suggests to me that a "rape" actually happened. Certainly if you had been assaulted in such a manner there would have physical evidence to have indicated clearly that such penetration had taken place. Nothing you are reporting symptomatically suggests that such a thing actually happened.

I don't see any need for testing. If you find that this fear lingers on I suggest you see a therapist or other professional to discuss your thoughts about it. We cannot help you with that in this setting.

[JesusSuarez]

Thank you, Andy.

It has been more than a week so I do not know what physical evidence can now be possible to see. I have of course already bathed, and washed/wiped my butt after I had a bad case of diarrhoea. All I know is that neither my pants nor underwear was wet or had blood stains in it. I just have to be positive that I have not been raped/penetrated and so am not HIV positive. I am getting therapy for my thoughts. But it looks like I may need another HIV test just to make sure I do or do not have it. I really wish I didn't have to, but my fear is just not going away.

You do great work here.

[Andy Velez]

OK, do what you need to do to satisfy your doubts. There really is nothing more we can do for you in this setting.