Positive in China

[ilovea]

I am helping my husband write this as he is Chinese and my English typing is faster.

He was just told he is positive yesterday.  I was tested too and am negative.  It's very scary being in China.  A lot of the Chinese forums seem to give bad information.  He has been told he will be dead in 7 years.  He has been told he can give me HIV from kissing.  Where can I show him the real facts?

Is the HIV treatment in China so bad?  He will be given medication from the government for free, but we don't know what it is yet.  There is so much fake stuff in China that we don't even know if it's real.

We have already applied for his permanent resident card to move to the U.S.  but we need to stay here until that is ready.

He is 25 and scared.  I don't even know if the doctors here are educated enough to help.

For myself, how often should I get tested.  I'm the top and we haven't used condoms as we have been monogomous for 3 years.   He got tested because his ex boyfriend, whom he has not seen in over 3 years told him that he is positive.  My husband tested negative before we got married over a year ago.  Is it really possible that he tested negative more than a year after being with his boyfriend and is positive now?  I'm not doubting that he was faithful.  I'm confused that the virus can be undetected for so long.

[Mightysure]

I'm sorry about your situation.  This website has a lot of great information about hiv, transmission and treatment.  As far as what's available in China,  it's difficult for us to know for sure.  Have you been told those things about HIV from Healthcare professionals or other people? Are there doctors in your area who treat HIV patients who your husband could go ask? I would definitely look into that.
It seems as though you know a little bit about it because you sad the things he was told was wrong.  But it's possible that when he was tested that he was positive but hadn't seroconverted yet.  Seroconversion is when someone who is infected begins to produce enough antibodies to be detected by tests.  So he may not have been unfaithful.

[mecch]

Hello.

Your post will probably be moved shortly as you are not positive and must post elsewhere in this forum - someone I know.

When he gets the medicine, you can research it online and know if its the standard stuff, or the latest stuff, or rather old stuff.  You can also post the names of the molecules online here and someone will comment.

China is in many respects a first world country with surely some excellent doctors, hospitals, research universities, etc.  So perhaps its depends on what access you have to the good and not the average or poor.

As to your question about faithfulness. Your/his theory is that he got this perhaps from his ex.  He didn't see him for 3 years.  He tested negative a bit over a year ago. NO he did not get this from that ex. Impossible.

The antibodies are undetected for a couple of weeks. With the latest tests in a first world country, the virus CAN be detected in a matter of a week or 2 during primary infection. Before antibodies are present.

Mighty sure's theory is not supported by your timeline, either.  Sorry. Meaning it does not link the infection to a contact 3 years ago.  Yes, maybe right before you guys started having sex, he had another lover, and was in seroconversion when he got tested to be with you. We are talking a few weeks. If there was no other lover recently around the time you got together and started barebacking, then its likely he got infected while you have been together.  That is my reading of it. Whatever. Take it or leave it.

I just want to say NO - the virus does not remain "hidden" - for months or years. NO.

[CaveyUK]

Unless it is an unassailable issue for you, I would stop focusing on the why and when, and instead focus on the treatment and getting him (and by association you) back to a healthy place in life.

Ignore stuff on forums talking about 'only years to live' and other outdated rubbish, and focus on forums such as this one. I'm in the uk, and another good and very easy to understand website called http://i-base.info/hiv-positive/ has some really super-clear information. It's like an HIV for dummies really, although bear in mind it is UK-focused.

Doctors in China...proper doctors, are not going to dish out 'fake stuff'. They may prescribe generic (non branded) meds but not stuff that won't work. There would be no point as their patients wouldn't get better. So don't worry about that. I can't comment on which drugs are first choice treatments in China, but the doctor would discuss all that with your partner before starting anyway.

You won't get HIV from kissing. You will need to use protection from now on, until at least he has an undetectable viral load for a while (although even then protection is a failsafe).

The doctor will be able to advise on frequency of tests for you as it may vary based on location and guidelines. I've heard once a year (once he is undetectable) but don't quote me on that.

If he gets on treatment, then there is no reason he won't live a long and happy life.