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Author Topic: Questions...please help  (Read 8345 times)

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Offline vigs077

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Questions...please help
« on: November 19, 2007, 09:22:23 am »
 Hello all.

I am new here and have a question.  I recieved a BJ (I was the insertive partner) from a high risk person over 2 months ago.  I tested negative at 6 weeks which gave me some relief.  But recently, into my 8th week, (appx. 57 days), I've been experincing a sore throat, nasal conjestion(with alot of phlem), dry cough but no fever.  I also got 2 canker sores.  Now I'm freaked out again.  So my questions are:

1- How reliable is a 6 week negative given my exposure?
2- is it likely to develop symptoms 8 weeks later(serconversion)?
3- are these symptoms-sore throat, nasal conjestion(with alot of phlem), dry cough, canker sores ARS symptoms

Please help as I am completely losing it now.

Offline Ann

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Re: Questions...please help
« Reply #1 on: November 19, 2007, 09:55:08 am »
vigs,

Contrary to popular myth, there really is no such thing as a "high risk person". However, there ARE high risk ACTIVITIES - namely unprotected anal or vaginal intercourse.

You can stop testing over this incident - you ARE hiv negative. Getting your penis sucked is NOT a risk for hiv infection. Not one single person has EVER become infected from getting a blowjob and you will not be the first.

Along with reading the Transmission Lesson and forum posting guidelines found in our Welcome Thread, here's what you need to know in order to remain hiv negative:

You need to be using condoms for anal or vaginal intercourse, every time, no exceptions until such time as you are in a securely monogamous relationship where you have both tested for ALL sexually transmitted infections together. To agree to have unprotected intercourse is to consent to the possibility of being infected with an STI. Sex with a condom lasts only a matter of minutes, but hiv is forever.

Have a look through all three condom and lube links in my signature line so you can use condoms with confidence.

Although you do NOT need further hiv testing over this blowjob, anyone who is sexually active should be having a full sexual health care check-up, including but not limited to hiv testing, at least once a year and more often if unprotected intercourse occurs.

If you aren't already having regular, routine check-ups, now is the time to start. As long as you make sure condoms are being used for intercourse, you can fully expect your routine hiv tests to return with negative results. Don't forget to always get checked for all the other sexually transmitted infections as well, because they are MUCH easier to transmit than hiv.

Use condoms for anal or vaginal intercourse, correctly and consistently, and you will remain hiv negative. It really is that simple!

Ann
Condoms are a girl's best friend

Condom and Lube Info  

"...health will finally be seen not as a blessing to be wished for, but as a human right to be fought for." Kofi Annan

Nymphomaniac: a woman as obsessed with sex as an average man. Mignon McLaughlin

HIV is certainly character-building. It's made me see all of the shallow things we cling to, like ego and vanity. Of course, I'd rather have a few more T-cells and a little less character. Randy Shilts

Offline vigs077

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Re: Questions...please help
« Reply #2 on: November 19, 2007, 10:00:06 am »
thanks Anne, but I developed these symptoms, i sort of freaked out a bit... :-[

Offline Andy Velez

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Re: Questions...please help
« Reply #3 on: November 19, 2007, 10:31:18 am »
There's nothing even remotely HIV-specific about your symptoms. But in any case neither the presence nor the absence of symptoms is ever the way to know anything about your HIV status accurately. If you have had a risky incident such as unprotected vaginal or anal intercourse then testing at 13 weeks is how you get your accurate status.

All of that is irrelevant for you since getting a blowjob is not a risk for HIV transmission. Period.

See your doctor about your symptoms. They have nothing to do with HIV.
Andy Velez

Offline vigs077

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Re: Questions...please help
« Reply #4 on: November 19, 2007, 01:38:57 pm »
Ok, here I go again beating a dead horse.  So I'm 100% HIV negative, correct?

I guess I just need to hear it from you guys to calm my anxiety.

Thanks for eveything.


Offline Andy Velez

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Re: Questions...please help
« Reply #5 on: November 19, 2007, 01:40:29 pm »
Yes. you're HIV negative. Period. End of story.
Andy Velez

Offline vigs077

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Re: Questions...please help
« Reply #6 on: November 20, 2007, 09:32:26 am »
well, i made a promise to myself that this will be my last post hopefully...

i know my exposure was low risk but i just cant look past my symptoms here...sore throat,semi-dry cough and stuffy nose for a few days now...i guess i'm being obsessive about this, but i cant help it...i just think that i  need assurance that its nearly impossible for me to be infected given my exposure, the 6 week negative test, and symptoms in my 8th week which i read is not common (is this true btw?)...i dont know...but talking it out makes me feel better i guess...thanks guys

Offline Ann

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  • It just is, OK?
    • Num is sum qui mentiar tibi?
Re: Questions...please help
« Reply #7 on: November 20, 2007, 10:24:50 am »
vigs,

You're leaving out the most important aspect of your case. You did NOT put yourself at risk for hiv infection when you got a blowjob. Hiv transmission simply does not happen this way.

You tested hiv negative because you ARE hiv negative. If your symptoms persist, see your doctor. They have nothing to do with hiv.

Ann
Condoms are a girl's best friend

Condom and Lube Info  

"...health will finally be seen not as a blessing to be wished for, but as a human right to be fought for." Kofi Annan

Nymphomaniac: a woman as obsessed with sex as an average man. Mignon McLaughlin

HIV is certainly character-building. It's made me see all of the shallow things we cling to, like ego and vanity. Of course, I'd rather have a few more T-cells and a little less character. Randy Shilts

Offline vigs077

  • Member
  • Posts: 13
Re: Questions...please help
« Reply #8 on: November 21, 2007, 10:16:20 pm »
Well, I went to the doctor and he gave me some medication for my cold.  i asked him if these symptoms have anything to do with my negative hiv test and of course he said no!  i still am worried though and after the "livelifetothefullest" post i am even more nervous.  do you guys think i should test at 9 or 10 weeks?  its just scary that i got these symptoms weeks after my exposure when i rarely get sick...

Offline RapidRod

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Re: Questions...please help
« Reply #9 on: November 22, 2007, 05:46:58 am »
You got a bj, you were never at risk and didn't need to test.

Offline Andy Velez

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Re: Questions...please help
« Reply #10 on: November 22, 2007, 09:35:05 am »
Between here and the grave in the hopefully far distant future you will experience all kinds of physical symptoms from time to time. The ones you are experiencing now have nothing to do with HIV. Even though you insist of attributing them to "strange coincidence."

And they never will have anything to do with HIV as long as you always use condoms for intercourse. In terms of sexuality unprotected intercourse is THE risk and the rest is strictly theoretical rather than actual.

Get on with your life and be grateful you're healthy is what I say. And if you have any other troubling symptoms discuss them with your doctor.
Andy Velez

Offline vigs077

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Re: Questions...please help
« Reply #11 on: November 22, 2007, 01:39:14 pm »
I just want to say Happy Thanksgiving to you guys.  Thanks for all your help the last few days.

You guys do great work here.

Offline vigs077

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Re: Questions...please help
« Reply #12 on: November 22, 2007, 02:12:23 pm »
Hey, was just reading some stories of people who say that they were infected via oral sex.  Is this true?  Are they the ones giving the bj?  or are they the insertive partners?  Please help soooo scared and confused.

Offline Matty the Damned

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Re: Questions...please help
« Reply #13 on: November 22, 2007, 02:35:14 pm »
You received a blowjob which not a risk for HIV transmission.

The idea that a person giving a blowjob to an HIV positive person can be infected is a theoretical one. There has never been a documented case of HIV being transmitted in that way. Indeed recent studies of serodiscordant couple (ie where one partner is positive and the other is not) and oral sex revealed that not one HIV negative person in those sample groups was infected.

Some people claim that they were infected through oral sex but that does not prove anything more than that they claim they were infected that way.

You do not have HIV.

Offline Andy Velez

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Re: Questions...please help
« Reply #14 on: November 23, 2007, 08:48:37 am »
Vigs, you need to stop surfing the net for other people's stories. It will only feed your worst fears. Lay off of that. It's bad for your health. Really. 

The issues regarding HIV and sex in terms of protection are not complicated. If you read our lesson on transmission you get all the basics.

Andy Velez

Offline vigs077

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  • Posts: 13
Re: Questions...please help
« Reply #15 on: November 23, 2007, 12:08:16 pm »
Andy/Matty,

I know I have to stop searching, I've been a complete jackass lately and overwhelmed by unrealistic fears. The information that I found actually came from his site.  The question that I have was that are most of these claims from the BJ givers?  I'm just trying to educate myself more and more each day.

Offline Ann

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  • It just is, OK?
    • Num is sum qui mentiar tibi?
Re: Questions...please help
« Reply #16 on: November 23, 2007, 01:26:02 pm »
Vigs,

Not one single person has ever become infected from getting a blowjob and you will NOT be the first.

Ann
Condoms are a girl's best friend

Condom and Lube Info  

"...health will finally be seen not as a blessing to be wished for, but as a human right to be fought for." Kofi Annan

Nymphomaniac: a woman as obsessed with sex as an average man. Mignon McLaughlin

HIV is certainly character-building. It's made me see all of the shallow things we cling to, like ego and vanity. Of course, I'd rather have a few more T-cells and a little less character. Randy Shilts

Offline vigs077

  • Member
  • Posts: 13
Re: Questions...please help
« Reply #17 on: November 24, 2007, 11:41:28 am »
Andy,Matty,Rod,Anne,

Last question.

Lets say that the person who gave me the BJ is HIV+

So, are you guys saying that I can resume having sex with my pregnant wife with 110% certainty
that I am HIV- and will cause no harm to my wife and unborn baby?

Thanks.

Offline Ann

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  • It just is, OK?
    • Num is sum qui mentiar tibi?
Re: Questions...please help
« Reply #18 on: November 24, 2007, 12:12:26 pm »
Vigs,

Getting a blowjob from someone who happens to be hiv positive is in NO WAY a risk for hiv infection. You can get all the positive blowjobs you want, and you'll NEVER become infected in this manner. Not one person ever has and you will not be the first.

Ann
Condoms are a girl's best friend

Condom and Lube Info  

"...health will finally be seen not as a blessing to be wished for, but as a human right to be fought for." Kofi Annan

Nymphomaniac: a woman as obsessed with sex as an average man. Mignon McLaughlin

HIV is certainly character-building. It's made me see all of the shallow things we cling to, like ego and vanity. Of course, I'd rather have a few more T-cells and a little less character. Randy Shilts

Offline vigs077

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  • Posts: 13
Re: Questions...please help
« Reply #19 on: November 24, 2007, 12:31:11 pm »
so, i can resume sex with my pregnant wife?

:-\

Offline RapidRod

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Re: Questions...please help
« Reply #20 on: November 24, 2007, 12:34:59 pm »
Of course you can. You need to know that you can contract other STDs from receiving a blowjob.

Offline vigs077

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  • Posts: 13
Re: Questions...please help
« Reply #21 on: December 06, 2007, 11:54:58 am »
Hello, I guess I'm stressing again that why i am on here.

Anyway,

I've been avaoiding sex with my wife (she is pregnant) because I'm still a little scared.  My question is should I test again?  Its been 11 weeks and I did test negative at 6.  Part of me doesnt want to test again and just put it all behind me, but part of me wants to test again.  I dont know, confused here.  Any suggestions?

Thanks guys.

Offline RapidRod

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Re: Questions...please help
« Reply #22 on: December 06, 2007, 12:54:38 pm »
Reread all the replies that you have been given. Geesh..

Offline vigs077

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Re: Questions...please help
« Reply #23 on: December 06, 2007, 01:56:45 pm »
yeah, i have rod...i guess i just need to put it all behind me... :-\

 


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