freaking out..!! condom break....!!!!

[crazyidiotguy]

Thank you for accepting me out here.. have been on this site often lately and must say what a good job you all doing helping all these people in need of help and advice regarding hiv/aids..

i would like to tell you my situation.. im freaking out lately.. i have always had safe sex with condoms.. although i must have had sex just 3-4 times in my life.. recently i got drunk and picked up a girl outside a bar.. we went to her place and she put a condom and gave me oral for a minute.. then she lied down and told me to come on top of her for sex..

she didnt spread her legs much dont kno why.. but she inserted my penis with a condom on in her.. and i started having sex but while having sex my penis came out 2-3 times(condom intact) n she inserted it again.. then i had sex for 2-3 minutes n removed my penis as i was feelin uncomfortable with the sex position..

when i did so the girl got to my notice the condom had broken and she removed even before i saw the damage n got another one.. after which i completed having sex by cumming in her with a condom which was intact(2nd one).. but later when i reached home and got sober i started freaking out..

becoz the girl didnt spread her legs like normally and she wasnt worried or bothered when the condom broke.. she was so calm.. i mean im freaking out coz i was unprotected for 1-2mins since the condom broke and it came to our notice only after i got it out.. recently since i was freaking out as i found out that this girl is hiv+.. im feeling so lost and alone.. the alcohol was the only reason... i blame myself for all this... i have a lovely family.. not married.. not that sexually active..

last time i had protected sex was more than a year ago.. i just went out at a pub for a few drinks as i needed a break from work work work.... now i regret all this.. i m so disappointed of having sex with a stranger.. its been 5weeks now since the exposure.. 3 weeks after the exposure i had an itchy body.. with a few red spots here and there.. no fever at all.. after 4weeks i had a slight cold.. dono if its cause the exposure as my mother has a bad cold and could get it from her.. also i get slight pains in my joins and muscles... dono if its coz of all the stress im taking lately

i havnt eaten or slept well since the exposure... have lost like 3kgs since exposure as i only keep think about getting infected with HIV.. i hardly eat.. can youll please help me??? according to your experience what are the chances im HIV+??? pls help!!! my itching stil continues here n there.. lymph nodes i cant see them as i dont kno wat they look like or feel like.. no fever no vomiting.. no diarrhea.. im going crazyyyyy.... pls help!!!!

[Ann]

Crazy,

I've yet to see the insertive partner end up hiv positive following a condom break and I do not expect you to be the first. Hiv is a fragile, difficult to transmit virus and it is more difficult to transmit from a woman (the receptive partner) to a man (the insertive partner).

However, you do need to test.

The vast majority of people who have actually been infected will seroconvert and test positive by six weeks, with the average time to seroconversion being only 22 days. A six week negative is highly unlikely to change, but must be confirmed at the three month point.

None of the symptoms you're complaining about are hiv specific. If you feel unwell, see a doctor. It's highly unlikely to have anything to do with a virus you are not likely to have.

Here's what you need to know in order to avoid hiv infection:

You need to be using condoms for anal or vaginal intercourse, every time, no exceptions until such time as you are in a securely monogamous relationship where you have both tested for ALL sexually transmitted infections together.

To agree to have unprotected intercourse is to consent to the possibility of being infected with an STI. Sex without a condom lasts only a matter of minutes, but hiv is forever.

Have a look through the condom and lube links in my signature line so you can use condoms with confidence. Make sure you read this information - a correctly used condom rarely breaks.

Anyone who is sexually active should be having a full sexual health care check-up, including but not limited to hiv testing, at least once a year and more often if unprotected intercourse occurs.

If you aren't already having regular, routine check-ups, now is the time to start. As long as you make sure condoms are being used for intercourse, you can fully expect your routine hiv tests to return with negative results.

Don't forget to always get checked for all the other sexually transmitted infections as well, because they are MUCH easier to transmit than hiv. Some of the other STIs can be present with no obvious symptoms, so the only way to know for sure is to test.

Use condoms for anal or vaginal intercourse, correctly and consistently, and you will avoid hiv infection. It really is that simple!

Ann

[crazyidiotguy]

thanks for the reply... just want to say im freaking out... i just keep finding symtoms in ma self since the incident.... my body keeps itching on and off.. have got different types of rashes.... few i used to get much before the exposure too.... but i dono its driving me crazy!!!! its been 5weeks now since the exposure... should i test right away or wait???

and what tests should i take??? now and later?? lately with all these tensions m only smoking... hardly eat... no appetite... but the rashes scare me coz they are of different types... and also the muscle aches and joint pains which come n go... sometimes my face n neck just itch with no rash.... pls give me advice on all this n acess my case... what tests and when should i do them... pls help... thank you!!

[Andy Velez]

Like Ann I expect you to come out of this incident ok. Nothing you are reporting symptomatically is in anyway HIV specific. For instance, the rash which is associated with ARS is not itchy. And neither the presence nor the absence of symptoms will ever tell you anything accurately about your HIV status.

Only an HIV test can give you that answer reliably. Wait until 6 weeks after the incident to test. A negative at that point is very unlikely to turn positive when you test for a conclusive result at 3 months. Use any standard HIV test.

Don't make this more complicated than it is. Again, I expect you to come out of this ok. If your symptoms persist you should discuss them with your doctor. I don't see HIV being the cause.

[crazyidiotguy]

Ann you said "I've yet to see the insertive partner end up hiv positive following a condom break and I do not expect you to be the first. Hiv is a fragile, difficult to transmit virus and it is more difficult to transmit from a woman (the receptive partner) to a man (the insertive partner). "

Just wanted to know if what you said was only out here on this site or every other place you have personally come across?? I just hope everything will be ok soon.... everyday is a struggle with all these negative talks... recently im gettin dry coughs.. after going thru the net it seems like i hav got almost all the hiv symtoms.. except fever and diareahh.. im so scared...!!! 

[Andy Velez]

What we tell you here is based on HIV science and decades of experience in the epidemic.

We know you're nervous right now but we do expect you to come out of this ok. Beyond that you just have to wait because only a test result at the right time can give you the answer you want.

And nothing you are reporting symptomatically is suggestive of HIV. But then neither the presence nor the absence of symptoms is ever the way to know anything accurately about your HIV status.

You need to focus on other things in your life while you are waiting to test. And don't bother saying you're too worried to do that. Just do it and make the time waiting go much more easily.

[Ann]

Ann you said "I've yet to see the insertive partner end up hiv positive following a condom break and I do not expect you to be the first. Hiv is a fragile, difficult to transmit virus and it is more difficult to transmit from a woman (the receptive partner) to a man (the insertive partner). "

Just wanted to know if what you said was only out here on this site or every other place you have personally come across??

I've never known the insertive partner to end up positive following a condom break anywhere on the internet or in "real life".

Don't bother going on about your symptoms. None of them are specific to only hiv. If you feel unwell, see a doctor. Whatever is going on is highly unlikely to have a single thing to do with hiv.

Ann