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Main Forums => Living With HIV => Topic started by: oksikoko on February 17, 2013, 08:42:56 pm

Title: So long and thanks for all the fish
Post by: oksikoko on February 17, 2013, 08:42:56 pm
OK, kids, despite my efforts, several things I wanted to avoid have come to pass. The holiday gave me an extension, but I'm leaving soon and don't know what's going to happen after that. I've been bracing myself for this over the past couple of weeks, so I think it's all gonna be OK eventually.

Good luck on your journeys. I hope we'll speak again someday.
Title: Re: So long and thanks for all the fish
Post by: texaninnyc87 on February 17, 2013, 08:45:22 pm
huh? What does this even mean?
Title: Re: So long and thanks for all the fish
Post by: mitch777 on February 17, 2013, 08:52:58 pm
OK, kids, despite my efforts, several things I wanted to avoid have come to pass. The holiday gave me an extension, but I'm leaving soon and don't know what's going to happen after that. I've been bracing myself for this over the past couple of weeks, so I think it's all gonna be OK eventually.

Good luck on your journeys. I hope we'll speak again someday.
this is very sad to hear.
you have been a very refreshing part of the forums since your arrival.
i know you have been dealing with housing issues (to say the least) and i have hoped from your earliest posts that things would work out for you somehow.
is this the reason for this post?
what are you going to do?
m.
Title: Re: So long and thanks for all the fish
Post by: mitch777 on February 17, 2013, 09:00:30 pm
PS- Your title of this thread says alot. 8) ;) :'(
Title: Re: So long and thanks for all the fish
Post by: buginme2 on February 17, 2013, 09:15:25 pm
are you breaking up with us?
Title: Re: So long and thanks for all the fish
Post by: leatherman on February 17, 2013, 09:24:43 pm
PS- Your title of this thread says alot. 8) ;) :'(
oksikoko, you are one froody dude. Don't say "So long". Just take a break, get things together, and get back here soon. Don't forget your towel. ;)
Title: Re: So long and thanks for all the fish
Post by: mikeyb39 on February 17, 2013, 10:42:10 pm
Just like the men in my life.  comes and goes without warning... :'(
Title: Re: So long and thanks for all the fish
Post by: tednlou2 on February 17, 2013, 11:12:40 pm
I know he talked about losing his housing.  I assumed this was what this post was about, and not leaving due to some issue with the forums. 

If this is about your housing situation, then this is truly sad.  Where will you go?  Are there assistance programs for housing?  Keep in touch, as best you can.  I wish there was something we could do to help. 
Title: Re: So long and thanks for all the fish
Post by: WillyWump on February 18, 2013, 06:58:22 pm
OK, kids, despite my efforts, several things I wanted to avoid have come to pass. The holiday gave me an extension, but I'm leaving soon and don't know what's going to happen after that. I've been bracing myself for this over the past couple of weeks, so I think it's all gonna be OK eventually.

Good luck on your journeys. I hope we'll speak again someday.

Well I'm not sure what this means but I dont like it one bit. You have been a breath of fresh air in an otherwise barren landscape of ho-hum queens here in our little corner of the world.

I hope things fall in place for you, and Im hoping you find housing....Surely there is some type of assistance at your ASO? Maybe you've exhausted that, I dont know.

Godspeed and hurry back and let us know how you are doing

-Will

 
Title: Re: So long and thanks for all the fish
Post by: texaninnyc87 on February 18, 2013, 11:18:49 pm
Ah, well if you read his last post in the Research forum it makes a bit more sense. I guess Oksi was just a little sick of the intense amount of rules and moderating that come alone with these forums... :-\
Title: Re: So long and thanks for all the fish
Post by: Solo_LTSurvivor on February 18, 2013, 11:25:26 pm
Ah, well if you read his last post in the Research forum it makes a bit more sense. I guess Oksi was just a little sick of the intense amount of rules and moderating that come alone with these forums... :-\

Jumping  to conclusions now, are we?  Have any of you posting here ever thought about the fact that he came here looking for something and happened to find whatever it was that he needed?  And maybe as a result he decided to move on.  There is no unwritten requirement that someone absolutely has to remain tethered to these forums; they do have expiration dates for some people.
Title: Re: So long and thanks for all the fish
Post by: mecch on February 18, 2013, 11:37:18 pm
Good luck on your journeys. I hope we'll speak again someday.

I thought you were accessing the Internet in the Public Library and/or from wherever your have been hanging your hat as a temporary home of the month.  Its a bit frustrating to read this message, which is not clear, and seems to say you'll disappear from here in the Forum. Buy why, exactly? The hint is homelessness but perhaps that is not the reason?

You tell us about your isolation and you made a nice, friendly, sociable entrance here. I can't imagine why you don't want to keep the contact.  I worry that you are choosing extreme isolation again...

Anyway, if you are going away from the forum, you'll be missed.  And people do worry.... I'm worried...
Title: Re: So long and thanks for all the fish
Post by: texaninnyc87 on February 18, 2013, 11:45:08 pm
Maybe I should have said "perhaps" as i have not actually confirmed with him about this, but this kind of reiterates the point that every post on here is scrutinized and picked apart, sometimes to the extent that the original purpose of the post is lost or overlooked.

i was trying to post one reason as to why he might have left. looking at this thread several are proposed. since it seems the OP will not be rejoining us to clarify matters i felt, after reading his criticism of Ann's moderation in the Research page, that i might add the preceding hypothesis for his sudden departure. He posted very frequently and one of his last posts on this forum (prior to this message) voices a distinct contempt for the way things are managed on these forums. i thought i would bring this to light to those who hadn't read his post in the Research section since I myself was confused as to the exact reasoning behind the abruptness of his farewell message and reading his post brought his dissatisfaction to light.

it might shock you to learn that in fact i HAVE considered the fact that his needs may have been met by these forums and that could have been his reason for leaving. when reflecting on this it seems unlikely to me that someone who was so outspoken when asking for guidance would leave so abruptly without stating precisely why. this leads me to believe that he might have had other reasons for leaving. his needs may well have not been met by these forums, which is precisely what my posting meant to address. i will reiterate that i have not spoken with him and this is solely speculation on my part. my intent was solely to direct any curious members to his posting in the Research page so that they might make their own opinions.

regardless of his reasons for leaving, i hope everything works out for him. we'd corresponded a decent amount and i know he was dealing with a lot. hopefully even though he couldn't find all of his answers on these forums he will somewhere else.
Title: Re: So long and thanks for all the fish
Post by: Miss Philicia on February 19, 2013, 12:02:37 am
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QVFfgm-J50Q
Title: Re: So long and thanks for all the fish
Post by: texaninnyc87 on February 19, 2013, 12:07:13 am
i made that video miss p posted to reiterate my point that people shouldn't be overly critical of posts.

thank you for finding it and sharing my work with this community. it is a bit unnerving to be outed like this since now you will all, undoubtedly, see me on the street and make my hiv status public knowledge but i'm proud to be an advocate for HIV awareness and ending internet trolling. it's time i stopped hiding.
Title: Re: So long and thanks for all the fish
Post by: Miss Philicia on February 19, 2013, 12:13:23 am
fascinating
Title: Re: So long and thanks for all the fish
Post by: mecch on February 19, 2013, 12:56:06 am
huh
(http://s3-ec.buzzfed.com/static/enhanced/terminal05/2012/5/25/15/anigif_enhanced-buzz-19059-1337975121-6.gif)
Title: Re: So long and thanks for all the fish
Post by: Joe K on February 19, 2013, 12:59:46 am
Maybe I should have said "perhaps" as i have not actually confirmed with him about this, but this kind of reiterates the point that every post on here is scrutinized and picked apart, sometimes to the extent that the original purpose of the post is lost or overlooked.

i was trying to post one reason as to why he might have left. looking at this thread several are proposed. since it seems the OP will not be rejoining us to clarify matters i felt, after reading his criticism of Ann's moderation in the Research page, that i might add the preceding hypothesis for his sudden departure. He posted very frequently and one of his last posts on this forum (prior to this message) voices a distinct contempt for the way things are managed on these forums. i thought i would bring this to light to those who hadn't read his post in the Research section since I myself was confused as to the exact reasoning behind the abruptness of his farewell message and reading his post brought his dissatisfaction to light.

it might shock you to learn that in fact i HAVE considered the fact that his needs may have been met by these forums and that could have been his reason for leaving. when reflecting on this it seems unlikely to me that someone who was so outspoken when asking for guidance would leave so abruptly without stating precisely why. this leads me to believe that he might have had other reasons for leaving. his needs may well have not been met by these forums, which is precisely what my posting meant to address. i will reiterate that i have not spoken with him and this is solely speculation on my part. my intent was solely to direct any curious members to his posting in the Research page so that they might make their own opinions.

regardless of his reasons for leaving, i hope everything works out for him. we'd corresponded a decent amount and i know he was dealing with a lot. hopefully even though he couldn't find all of his answers on these forums he will somewhere else.

I'm always leery of posts that attempt to explain the actions of others, especially when they include not so subtle digs at the forum.  These forums have been operating for over a decade and we change as required.  We must be doing something right, otherwise, nobody would post here.

If you have a problem, at least be a big enough person to state your issues directly, rather than trying to slip the slams under the radar.  I am sooooooo tired of folks whining, without offering any suggestions or solutions.

Joe
Title: Re: So long and thanks for all the fish
Post by: texaninnyc87 on February 19, 2013, 01:09:54 am
oh i thought my post was very clear and direct? let me simplify.

my issue is with people picking apart every post on here and not offering helpful replies. my solution is that people stop trying to criticize so much and not reply to posts with anything other than helpful information or anecdotal wisdom. save the personal attacks, cattiness, and criticism for the off topic forums, not for the sections of this site for people seeking advice. i hope that is not unreasonable or against the general purpose of these forums.

hope that cleared up my intentions. i was not trying to be subtle or deceptive but earnest and straightforward about the way that i feel about this. i stated several times that all of what i said was solely my own opinion and no one else's.
Title: Re: So long and thanks for all the fish
Post by: tednlou2 on February 19, 2013, 01:21:17 am
I am worried he's homeless.
Title: Re: So long and thanks for all the fish
Post by: anniebc on February 19, 2013, 04:45:56 am
my issue is with people picking apart every post on here and not offering helpful replies.

Wow! for someone who has only been here for 2/3 months that's one hell of a statement...are you sure about this, because I have to tell you that in the 10 years I have been here I have never seen every post picked apart, maybe one or two now and again when someone comes in and offers totally useless information,  but what I have seen is thousands of post with expert and helpful replies, and thousands of greatfull members....so it seems you got it a little wrong there tex.

Jan
Title: Re: So long and thanks for all the fish
Post by: Growler on February 19, 2013, 05:21:59 am
forium putuppmy with me shi8t and ni8ce  ;D
Title: Re: So long and thanks for all the fish
Post by: BT65 on February 19, 2013, 07:00:08 am
Wow! for someone who has only been here for 2/3 months that's one hell of a statement...are you sure about this, because I have to tell you that in the 10 years I have been here I have never seen every post picked apart, maybe one or two now and again when someone comes in and offers totally useless information,  but what I have seen is thousands of post with expert and helpful replies, and thousands of greatfull members....so it seems you got it a little wrong there tex.

Jan

I totally agree, Jan.  Had it not been for this forum I would never have known about the link between Isentress and insomnia.  And I've received deep support during some very dark times.  It meant the world to me and still does.  I've never seen every thread picked apart.  Like Jan said, maybe some, but that's what happens when different personalities participate in so many different subjects.  Not everyone is going to agree.  That's life.  Get over it.
Title: Re: So long and thanks for all the fish
Post by: bmancanfly on February 19, 2013, 08:36:42 am
I have no idea why he left,  but I think he left a clue here;

http://forums.poz.com/index.php?topic=47349.0

see reply #23.

I hope he is well,  and hope he returns.
Title: Re: So long and thanks for all the fish
Post by: mitch777 on February 19, 2013, 09:17:36 am
The forums are full of many different personalities with very different lives. I soon discovered that not everyone will always see eye to eye, have the same amount of patience, have the ability to communicate well, some can be angry and mean at times, some are more sensitive, some like to kid around alot and use the forums as a social outlet, some want to talk about the nitty gritty details of science, many have mental health issues, some have more tact than others, some reach out more often for help or to offer help, and MOST of us are a complicated combination of the above.
I would like to think that if I suddenly stopped appearing here that I would be missed and some may show concern as they have with Oksi.
The forums are about ALL of the people who come here, personal baggage included.
Yes, there are "rules".
We all are invited guests. :)
Title: Re: So long and thanks for all the fish
Post by: jkinatl2 on February 19, 2013, 09:55:38 am
I have no idea why he left,  but I think he left a clue here;

http://forums.poz.com/index.php?topic=47349.0

see reply #23.

I hope he is well,  and hope he returns.

Good to see you here to help.
Title: Re: So long and thanks for all the fish
Post by: bmancanfly on February 19, 2013, 09:57:54 am
Good to see you taking no resposibility for your actions - as usual.
Title: Re: So long and thanks for all the fish
Post by: Dachshund on February 19, 2013, 10:02:36 am
Because of the vague nature of the OP's original post all you're left with is speculation. Impossible to offer any suggestions if you don't know what the problem is. Is he homeless, incarcerated, ill, abusing drugs or just feels like moving on?  Without him sharing we're left with speculating. Best you can do is wish him well and let him know the forums will be here if and when he needs it. Actually this is pretty typical behavior for a new member of the forums. Posting for awhile and then leaving.
Title: Re: So long and thanks for all the fish
Post by: Jeff G on February 19, 2013, 10:24:34 am
Oksikoko , we will always be here for you if and when you are ready to come back .

The OP is dealing with his own problems in his own way and his departure had nothing to do with the forum . I know this because I have communicated with in in the past leading up to this .

Before this thread spirals out of control I think its best I lock it .