Worth testing?

[kiddo05]

Hi everyone,

I just wanted to say that these forums have been very filled with great information that I've used to educate myself about HIV. But, sadly, I still have some questions because my nerves get the best of me. There are two incidents that I am curious as to whether I need to test over or not...

The first one was in early February and involved nothing more than handjobs, kissing, him giving me a blowjob, rimming (him rimming me), and frottage. However, he was rubbing his penis against my anus and at one time I could kinda feel the head of it directly on the outside of my anus. I'm assuming he didn't not penetrate (as I'm a virgin so I'm sure I would know if he penetrated me or not), but it kinda of worries me. Is it possible that this form of rubbing could lead to an HIV infection?

The second one occurred about six weeks ago, when I gave a guy a blowjob. It didn't last for longer than 2 minutes (if that), and he did not ejaculate in my mouth, and I'm pretty sure there was no precum at this time (I didn't taste anything and he was not dripping fluids prior and after this). Now I know oral sex is very, very low and almost practically nonexistent. However, I had flossed about 45 minutes to an hour beforehand and bled a little from my gums. It wasn't anything abnormal, it just happens when you don't usually floss, at least that's what my dentist tells me everytime I go in. Does this mean I put myself at a higher risk of infection? I had an HIV test on March 29th and it was negative. I had wanted to test for prior sexual experiences since I'm a college kid and never have been tested before so that's why I didn't wait for the window to end for these other two events.

So I guess my question boils down to is it worth getting another test at 13 weeks for either of these events? I'm thinking about going Monday for another one as it would be the 6 week mark for the oral sex event. I've heard that 6 weeks is a good indicator and if its negative then, do you think I should test again at the 13 week mark?

I'm sorry for all these questions, it's just I talked to different people and they tell me different things such as oral sex is very high risk and worth testing over every time it happens. Then I go and talk to another HIV counselor who tells me they have to tell me to use a condom for everything, but personally he would never use a condom for just oral sex. It's frustrating trying to figure out what it is safe and what isn't with the current system.

Any response is appreciated!

[RapidRod]

I don't see any reason to test for either situation.

[Ann]

kiddo,

Rubbing body parts, including genitals, together is what's known as frottage. Frottage is not a risk for hiv infection, although it can be risky for some of the other sexually transmitted infections. It's not a risk where hiv is concerned, as long as you do not get carried away and allow unprotected penetration.

And yes, if you were penetrated anally, you WOULD have known about it.

Oral sex is very, very low on the risk scale. There have been long-term studies of couples where one is positive and one is negative. In the couples who used condoms for anal or vaginal intercourse, but no barrier for oral activities, not one of the negative partners became infected with hiv. Not one. This shows us two things. One, condoms are very effective for the prevention of hiv transmission. Two, oral sex is much lower risk than previously believed. We now have the evidence that oral sex is a very low risk activity where hiv transmission is concerned. In fact, the ONLY oral activity that is even remotely risky is giving blowjobs. However, if your oral health is good, there little reason to worry.

You really don't need to test again over either of these incidents. And yes, I read about your flossing. You only need to test again when six months to a year has passed and it's time for a routine sexual health care check up.

You need to be using condoms for anal or vaginal intercourse, every time, no exceptions until such time as you are in a securely monogamous relationship where you have both tested for ALL STIs together. To agree to have unprotected intercourse is to consent to the possibility of being infected with a sexually transmitted infection. Sex with a condom lasts only a matter of minutes, but hiv is forever.

Have a look through the condom and lube links in my signature line so you can use condoms with confidence.

Again, although you don't need to test again now, anyone who is sexually active should be having a full sexual health care check-up, including but not limited to hiv testing, at least once a year and more often if unprotected intercourse occurs.

If you aren't already having regular, routine check-ups, now is the time to start. As long as you make sure condoms are being used for intercourse, you can fully expect your routine hiv tests to return with negative results. Don't forget to always get checked for all the other sexually transmitted infections as well, because they are MUCH easier to transmit than hiv.

Use condoms for anal or vaginal intercourse and you will avoid hiv infection. It really is that simple.

Ann

[kiddo05]

Thank you so much for your responses!

I only ever only do mutual masturbation or receive oral which carries no risk for HIV, but I guess the first time I performed oral sex on the guy my nerves got the best of me. As someone coming out of high school a year ago, I wish sex education would've been like this! You guys are so informative and tell it like it is without hidden agendas. Thanks so much again!

This is just kind of a side question if anyone wishes to answer, but if I only engage in activities such as frottage, oral sex, and mutual masturbation should I get an HIV test during my STI checkups every 6 months? The only reason I ask this is because I went to a Planned Parenthood near me in January to get tested for STIs and when they found out that I was a virgin they kind of treated me like why was I wasting their time and when I requested an HIV test they again brushed me off and didn't bother.  I think they just checked for gonorrhea and chlamydia and even then told me they only reason they did that was because it was routine.

[kiddo05]

Hello all,

I've got another question about transmission risk. Recently, my boyfriend and I decided to have an open relationship (as we are both young and about 10 hours apart when at school). In between this, I met a guy my age and we fooled around. It was mostly kissing and mutual masturbation (no oral or anal sex ever happened). However, I did finger him for a while.

Is there any risk for this? I noticed I had a hangnail and a very light cut on my finger that I had gotten the day before. I wasn't bleeding and when I withdrew my finger there wasn't any blood from him or anything (as I had used lube).

Now my problem is that my boyfriend and I decided that even though the distance makes us unhappy, we want to stay committed to each other and he's coming up on Valentine's Day to see me for the night. Is there any reason I shouldn't engage in sexual activities with him? This was the only time I've ever done something with another guy since starting to date him and the only one guy during our period of an open relationship. Is it true that no one has ever gotten HIV from fingering so I probably won' be the first?

Thanks for all your help!

[RapidRod]

There is no risk in fingering. Hangnail or not..

[kiddo05]

Thanks! I'm young and still trying to learn about the ways to keep me safe (besides the obvious wearing condoms). I appreciate the answer! I guess I just overreacted because of the cut on my finger and figured I could be infected by HIV through that...even though the wound didn't look deep and wasn't bleeding at all. Thanks again!

[Andy Velez]

We're glad you want to learn about protecting yourself. If you make sure that an insertive partner during intercourse always wears a condom you are pretty much covered as far as sexual risk is concerned. Other sexual acts are pretty much theoretical in terms of risk. In the real world of HIV it's unprotected intercourse that results in HIV transmission.

Cheers,

[kiddo05]

Thank you once again for your advice! I really do appreciate it. So in otherwords, based on what I described, I can expect a negative result at my annual HIV test in April?

[thunter34]

From post 4?  Kissing, mutual masturbation and some fingering?  Yep.  Expect a negative.