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Main Forums => Living With HIV => Topic started by: Wessel on April 30, 2008, 06:12:23 pm

Title: Gay bashing
Post by: Wessel on April 30, 2008, 06:12:23 pm
Just.got attaced because.in.gay.and.hiv. I just want to rageĦ.sorry.to.waste.ynour.time
Title: Re: Gay bashing
Post by: chm02 on April 30, 2008, 06:18:18 pm
DAMNIT!!!
I'm so sorry!!!!
 :(
Is that all the raging you're gonna do? What happened?
Title: Re: Gay bashing
Post by: Matty the Damned on April 30, 2008, 06:22:23 pm
Matty the Damned feels your pain, Wessel. He was bashed last year for being a butt-pirate.

I hope you weren't seriously hurt.

Fondly,

MtD
Title: Re: Gay bashing
Post by: Wessel on April 30, 2008, 06:32:29 pm
I.cant.give.piatures.on.my.phone my family sais i deserve it for being open
Title: Re: Gay bashing
Post by: Matty the Damned on April 30, 2008, 06:34:20 pm
Oh darling, how ghastly.

You're family is wrong, you don't deserve it. You've done nothing wrong. The bad people here are the thug(s) who beat you up. Have you sought medical attention?

Much love,

MtD
Title: Re: Gay bashing
Post by: minismom on April 30, 2008, 06:36:25 pm
I'm so very sorry that your family feels that way.  You've done nothing wrong, hun.  If you haven't, please seek medical attention. 

Mum
Title: Re: Gay bashing
Post by: appleboy on April 30, 2008, 06:36:38 pm
Now that is some hard news to swallow.  My dad is not nice to me because I am gay.  So I know how you feel when it comes to family not supporting you.  I do hope you are ok.  Now if the closed minded freaks would just open their minds a little bit we would not have to put up with this shit.  Can we not all just along?
AppleBoy
Title: Re: Gay bashing
Post by: chm02 on April 30, 2008, 06:41:46 pm
Ugh. Talk about adding insult to injury!
You've just been the victim of a crime! By definition, that means you DON'T deserve it.
 >:(
like matty says, call a doctor if you need to.
Also, are you going to file a police report?
I'm sorry your family doesn't understand, but plenty of other people do!
Title: Re: Gay bashing
Post by: Wessel on April 30, 2008, 06:42:30 pm
I.am.jurt.hoping that blue will becnme the next fashion.color  ps how do you get blood out of cotton sheets?
Title: Re: Gay bashing
Post by: Matty the Damned on April 30, 2008, 06:44:43 pm
Soak them in cold water and then wash cold with a good detergent. Never use hot water on blood stains. It sets them.

Sweetie, it sounds like you should get some medical attention if that's possible.

MtD
Title: Re: Gay bashing
Post by: Wessel on April 30, 2008, 06:56:57 pm
I am unemployed, it.is.a.long.weekend.in.sa.will get through.it.just.wanted.to.bitch
Title: Re: Gay bashing
Post by: Matty the Damned on April 30, 2008, 06:59:35 pm
Ah, You're in South Africa.

I understand. Bitch away babe. :-*

MtD
Title: Re: Gay bashing
Post by: minismom on April 30, 2008, 07:11:49 pm
Make a paste from detergent and water.  Put it on the stains and rub.  Wash it in cold water.  If the stains aren't gone, then don't put it in the dryer, it will set the stain.  Just wash them again.  If they are white, try adding some bleach to the water.  I agree with Matty.  I'd feel so much better if you saw a doctor.  I'm worried about you.

Mum
Title: Re: Gay bashing
Post by: Wessel on April 30, 2008, 07:13:23 pm
How dangerous.ir.it.if your.arm.turns.blue?cannot.use.it.is.it.broken?
Title: Re: Gay bashing
Post by: minismom on April 30, 2008, 07:16:48 pm
It could be broken, it could be very badly bruised, it could be sprained, it could be fractured.  You REALLY need to go see a doctor.

Mum
Title: Re: Gay bashing
Post by: Queen Tokelove on April 30, 2008, 07:17:33 pm
I was told that peroxide also gets blood out too. Never tried it though. Sorry to hear that your fam is not supportive of you being gay and saying you deserve it is just plain WRONG. If you can't move your arm, it sounds like you need medical attention.
Title: Re: Gay bashing
Post by: Wessel on April 30, 2008, 07:19:39 pm
Any.at.home.remedies?it.gs.3:00
Title: Re: Gay bashing
Post by: Wessel on April 30, 2008, 07:23:05 pm
Going.to.try.and sleep it off
Title: Re: Gay bashing
Post by: scud44 on April 30, 2008, 07:28:36 pm
Seek medical advice as soon as possible - you wont sleep of bruises and such - bashings of any type are deplorable and will not be tolerated in any civilised community.
Seek help from friends if you don't want to go to a doctor, but don't suffer in silence.

Best wishes and my thoughts are with you

Scuddly
Title: Re: Gay bashing
Post by: minismom on April 30, 2008, 07:31:53 pm
I would be afraid to suggest anything not knowing if you have a concussion. I'd stay away from taking Ibuprofin and aspirin for pain.  Are you alone?  If not, someone should wake you up every couple of hours in case you do have a concussion.

Mum
Title: Re: Gay bashing
Post by: allopathicholistic on April 30, 2008, 07:37:31 pm
Hi Wessel - I'm so sorry this happened to you. As mentioned in #7 you have the option to file a police report and of course it's also an option to not file a report if for example you think it might make matters worse. My thoughts are with you this evening.
Title: Re: Gay bashing
Post by: Ann on April 30, 2008, 07:48:27 pm
Wessel,

For a start, you're not wasting our time. Don't ever think that.

Next, you've got an injured arm, but what about your head? Have you been beaten around the head at all? If so, DO NOT GO TO SLEEP. Please, seek medical attention if you can.

If you can't, please, at least get a mate to come over and be with you. If you have concussion (head injury) you need to be kept awake.

This really sucks and I'm sorry it happened to you. Please keep in contact with us.

Hugs, (gentle ones)
Ann
xxx
Title: Re: Gay bashing
Post by: Wessel on April 30, 2008, 08:06:33 pm
Ann,not.to worry. Cannot.sleep whth the pain in my arm and face , gnt nobody to turn to exept the family but it really has to get bad bepfore.i  am going to ark them.ThankYou for.all.the.support! While.i.can still post i must be ok
Title: Re: Gay bashing
Post by: thunter34 on April 30, 2008, 08:27:47 pm
Wessel,

I'll join the others in saying how sorry I am to learn this happened to you.  Please keep in contect with us as best you can.  You did not deserve this.  Try to get med help as soon as you can.  It really sounds like you need it.

Tim
Title: Re: Gay bashing
Post by: AlanBama on April 30, 2008, 08:42:27 pm
So sorry this happened Wessel.  :'(   Makes me sad and very angry...

I do hope you will reconsider seeking some medical attention.   Something could be broken; you need X-rays.

Please take care of yourself, and keep us posted.

hugs,

Alan
Title: Re: Gay bashing
Post by: J.R.E. on April 30, 2008, 09:09:03 pm

I am sorry to hear what has happenned. But, you should get yourself to a doctor, and get checked. Of course it's your choice, but I would file a report with the proper authorities. I would be taking this time right now to start writing down any relevant information about what happenned to you, while it is still fresh in your mind. Descriptions, sound of the voice, ETC.  It would be nice to stop these scumbag/s from doing this again to someone else.

Take care of yourself---Ray
Title: Re: Gay bashing
Post by: BT65 on April 30, 2008, 10:02:37 pm
Wessel, I am so, so sorry this happened to you.  You didn't deserve any of it.  Please, please get some medical attention if you can.  I understand living in South Africa is not the same as living in the States, but I hope you get some help.  Please let us know how you're doing.
Title: Re: Gay bashing
Post by: aliveinla on April 30, 2008, 10:10:40 pm
I am so sorry to hear this. Wish you the best.
Title: Re: Gay bashing
Post by: OneMoreGuy on May 01, 2008, 02:00:52 am
Well.. this is one of the things that makes my blood boil! First you are bashed by your attackers and then by your family.

I am very sorry that you (and anyone else, for that matter) has had to go through this experience.

As many have already suggested, please DO try to get your bruises looked after. None of us here can determine how badly hurt you are and therefore, suggest home remedies for you to use to heal and get better.

Please keep us posted as to how you are doing.

Cheers,

OMG
Title: Re: Gay bashing
Post by: MarkB on May 01, 2008, 02:18:44 am
Hi Wessel

I am so sorry to read what happened to you, and my heart goes out to you. As it happens, I know SA quite well. Are you in (or near) a large town or city?

Hugs

A x
Title: Re: Gay bashing
Post by: mjmel on May 01, 2008, 04:33:26 am
Sorry this has happened, Wessel.
It is hard to imagine that you are coping without medical attention or painkillers.

The biggest hurdle I have had to face in my life is not being bitter about how the hetero dominated world treats us gays.

Mike
Title: Re: Gay bashing
Post by: Ann on May 01, 2008, 09:34:06 am
Hi Wessel,

How are you today? Sore, I bet. I hope you have had some medical attention by the time you read this. Please take care of yourself, ok? Let us know how you are - I'm worried about you and I'll wager others are too.

Hugs,
Ann
xxx
Title: Re: Gay bashing
Post by: aliveinla on May 01, 2008, 10:00:46 am
hope you are better today and having a day off. It's May Day holiday in other parts of the world. I don't know much about you and your background, but if I were you, I would try to leave that town, and sadly, family. That's how I coped. When I realized I was gay at 20yo in China, I picked a job all the way on the other end of the country in a very liberal city and only saw my family once a year. I love them and they love me but we can't stay more than a week under one roof. When I approached 30yo unmarried, pressure mounted so much at work and from family that I applied a student visa and came to California. I got my green card through work but I have many friends from other countries got their green card by applying for gay assylum. I don't know whether South Africa qualifies for this, but if you are interested I can check out for you.
Title: Re: Gay bashing
Post by: bleueyes on May 05, 2008, 06:10:04 am
I hope you're ok. I don't know how South Africa is but, I wish you were somewhere safe right now.
Title: Re: Gay bashing
Post by: anniebc on May 05, 2008, 06:21:16 am
Hi Wessel

It's been 4 days since we have heard from you, if you can please get in touch and let us know how you are doing.

Hugs
Jan :-*
Title: Re: Gay bashing
Post by: MarkB on May 07, 2008, 03:51:35 am
Hi Wessell

Still thinking about you, and worried that you haven't come back to us. If you live anywhere near Cape Town or Durban, let me know, as I might be able to help.

Hugs,

A x
Title: Re: Gay bashing
Post by: Okealyshire on May 08, 2008, 01:49:48 am
Too many people mindlessly turn to ridicule or violence when presented with something they disagree with or don't understand. Indeed it is sad, Wessel, to learn about what happened to you. Here's hoping that you're healing well.

Last year I got the chance to attend my first pride event -- San Francisco. My boyfriend, who lives halfway around the world, joined me. As we walked from the dance party (a total disappointment) back to my hotel, I suggested a short-cut through the financial district so he could see the Transamerica Pyramid. We were holding hands and feeling good. Then dammit if we didn't get knocked down by a gang of thugs -- who I even saw coming our way. My hinky detector wiggled a bit, but not enough to make me divert our path. Fortuately, we ran away without further incident.

My job takes me all over the world; about every other week I'm on a plane to someplace. I've been to over 30 countries and have wandered the streets of countless towns. And the only time in my life I get attacked just has to be in my own country, in my favorite city, while showing my lover around during his first visit to America. What the hell.
Title: Re: Gay bashing
Post by: mjmel on May 10, 2008, 04:00:48 pm
Wessell, if you can read these posts but are unable to communicate (type us a reply), know that you are often in our thoughts and we hope you are healing up well.
Hang tough, brother.

Mike