Welcome, Guest. Please login or register.
March 27, 2024, 12:57:02 am

Login with username, password and session length


Members
Stats
  • Total Posts: 772928
  • Total Topics: 66309
  • Online Today: 152
  • Online Ever: 5484
  • (June 18, 2021, 11:15:29 pm)
Users Online
Users: 1
Guests: 114
Total: 115

Welcome


Welcome to the POZ Community Forums, a round-the-clock discussion area for people with HIV/AIDS, their friends/family/caregivers, and others concerned about HIV/AIDS.  Click on the links below to browse our various forums; scroll down for a glance at the most recent posts; or join in the conversation yourself by registering on the left side of this page.

Privacy Warning:  Please realize that these forums are open to all, and are fully searchable via Google and other search engines. If you are HIV positive and disclose this in our forums, then it is almost the same thing as telling the whole world (or at least the World Wide Web). If this concerns you, then do not use a username or avatar that are self-identifying in any way. We do not allow the deletion of anything you post in these forums, so think before you post.

  • The information shared in these forums, by moderators and members, is designed to complement, not replace, the relationship between an individual and his/her own physician.

  • All members of these forums are, by default, not considered to be licensed medical providers. If otherwise, users must clearly define themselves as such.

  • Forums members must behave at all times with respect and honesty. Posting guidelines, including time-out and banning policies, have been established by the moderators of these forums. Click here for “Do I Have HIV?” posting guidelines. Click here for posting guidelines pertaining to all other POZ community forums.

  • We ask all forums members to provide references for health/medical/scientific information they provide, when it is not a personal experience being discussed. Please provide hyperlinks with full URLs or full citations of published works not available via the Internet. Additionally, all forums members must post information which are true and correct to their knowledge.

  • Product advertisement—including links; banners; editorial content; and clinical trial, study or survey participation—is strictly prohibited by forums members unless permission has been secured from POZ.

To change forums navigation language settings, click here (members only), Register now

Para cambiar sus preferencias de los foros en español, haz clic aquí (sólo miembros), Regístrate ahora

Finished Reading This? You can collapse this or any other box on this page by clicking the symbol in each box.

Welcome to Do I Have HIV?

Welcome to the "Do I Have HIV?" POZ forum.

This special section of the POZ forum is for individuals who have concerns about whether or not they are HIV positive. Individuals are permitted to post up to three questions or responses in this forum.

Ongoing participation in the "Do I Have HIV?" forum (posting more than three questions or responses) requires a paid subscription, with secure payments made via PayPal.

A seven-day subscription is $9.99, a 30-day subscription is $14.99 and a 90-day subscription is $24.99.

Anyone who needs to post more than three messages in the "Do I Have HIV?" forum -- including past, present and future POZ Forums members -- will need to subscribe, with secure payments made via PayPal.

There is no charge to read threads in the "Do I Have HIV?" forum, nor will there be a charge for participating in any of the other POZ forums. In addition, the POZ Basics "HIV Transmission and Risks" and "HIV Testing" basics, will remain accessible to all.

NOTE: HIV testing questions will still need to be posted in the "Do I Have HIV?" forum; attempts to post HIV symptoms or testing questions in any other forums will be considered violations of our rules of membership and subject to time-outs and permanent bans.

To learn how to upgrade your Forums account to participate beyond three posts in the "Do I Have HIV?" Forum, please click here.

Thank you for your understanding and future support of the best online support service for people living with, affected by and at risk for HIV.

Author Topic: Unprotected oral, protected sex and condom issue  (Read 3752 times)

0 Members and 1 Guest are viewing this topic.

Offline Kaz86

  • Standard
  • Member
  • Posts: 3
Unprotected oral, protected sex and condom issue
« on: October 20, 2017, 08:42:10 pm »
Hello, I'm a 31-year-old male from Malaysia.

6 weeks ago, I had unprotected oral sex at a massage parlor, along with unprotected oral sex and protected vaginal sex 3 weeks ago at a different place which is a brothel disguised as a massage parlor (not too sure if it's legal or illegal, but I have a feeling it's the latter). I'm not that worried about unprotected oral sex as it's widely said to be safe and so far, since both unprotected oral sex exposures, I have no discharges or any form of blister, chancre, lesion or sore on my penis. However, I do have concern in regards to the protected sex part. I've read questions similar to mine on here and MedHelp and most answers seem more in favor towards no risk or low risk, I feel I should post my own question.

First of all, I don't know the lady's status on weather she's infected or not, but the fact that the place is most probably illegal had given me the impression she might (but of course, I could be wrong), though the place provided condoms. To make a long story short, she gave me a brief oral sex (few seconds) before putting the condom on me to use her saliva as lubricant. We had protected sex for a few minutes. This is the part I screwed up as I stopped and asked for another oral sex. She removed the condom and gave me oral for a while (less than a minute) and I requested she put the same condom back on - which she did - and after a very brief vaginal sex (few seconds) with her on top with the reused condom, she asked for another condom as I brought my own condom and we proceeded with vaginal sex with the new condom until we finished the session. Now, my concern was when she asked to change the condom and it brings up few possibilities that could happen.

1.) She realized it wasn't a good idea to reuse the same condom and we should change it as it's better to be safe than sorry.

2.) She might have put the condom in reverse, personally, I don't think that's the case but my concern is that she might have.

3.) The reused condom was loose and slipped a little in her as she was on top, moving up and down (about 2 to 4 times before she asked for the change in condom).

4.) The worse case scenario, the condom might have broke, though I didn't feel any kind of breakage or difference and she didn't mention anything about it breaking.

Take note that this is my first time having protected vaginal sex. I did went to a clinic and told the doctor about the exposure and it was he who brought up the possibility of the condom breaking and I should get a HIV blood test in 3 to 4 weeks. But before I do that, I thought I should post my concerns here before going for a test next week which would be the 4th week post exposure.

Thank you.
« Last Edit: October 20, 2017, 08:46:06 pm by Kaz86 »

Offline Jim Allen

  • Administrator
  • Member
  • Posts: 22,257
  • Threads: @jim16309
    • Social Media: Threads
Re: Unprotected oral, protected sex and condom issue
« Reply #1 on: October 21, 2017, 03:09:17 am »
Hi

Getting a BJ is not a hiv risk, nobody has ever been infected this was.  Giving a BJ to a man is only a near negligible risk to the person who is given the BJ.

Condoms are not reusable product and they should be replaced.  It was reused for a brief time but thankfully it did not break so and you had no risk and condoms shred when they break  leaving no doubt. She than replaced the condom, as she should have done.

No reason or indication to think anything more about it.
You had no risk from what you posted here.

1,2,3. Guessing what she was thinking is pointless and no matter what she thought it changes nothing. 1,2 & 3 are simply not hiv risks.

My advice is move on, stop overthinking this and looking for a problem you don't have. Keep using condoms (correctly) for any intercourse and as routine test for HIV and the far easier to transmit STI's at least yearly.

Jim
HIV 101 - Everything you need to know
HIV 101
Read more about Testing here:
HIV Testing
Read about Treatment-as-Prevention (TasP) here:
HIV TasP
You can read about HIV prevention here:
HIV prevention
Read about PEP and PrEP here
PEP and PrEP

My Instagram
Threads

Offline Kaz86

  • Standard
  • Member
  • Posts: 3
Re: Unprotected oral, protected sex and condom issue
« Reply #2 on: October 21, 2017, 03:22:11 am »
Thank you so much, Jim. Much appreciated.

I never thought about the condom breaking when she asked for a condom change. My initial guess was that since the condom has already been used, it's loose and might have slipped a little during the brief moment she was "riding" me, as I didn't feel any breakage or difference before she asked for a change. What brought this concern to light was when the doctor at a local clinic I visited mentioned that might have been the reason why she asked for a change adds to my worry - perhaps irrationally too as I fear the possibility of somehow not knowing it happened due to this being my first time engaging in vaginal sex and the sex worker helped put the condom on for be - and he even suggested I get a blood test in the 3rd or 4th week.

Should I just go for it, or move on with life?

Offline Jim Allen

  • Administrator
  • Member
  • Posts: 22,257
  • Threads: @jim16309
    • Social Media: Threads
Re: Unprotected oral, protected sex and condom issue
« Reply #3 on: October 21, 2017, 03:34:19 am »
Seriously move on with your life.

It's just irrational fears, condoms shred leaving no doubt. So unless you were blind, you simply would have noticed her peeling and picking off the sad remains of a shredded condom from your penis.

Relax move on, stop wasting your energy on this  ;)

Jim

HIV 101 - Everything you need to know
HIV 101
Read more about Testing here:
HIV Testing
Read about Treatment-as-Prevention (TasP) here:
HIV TasP
You can read about HIV prevention here:
HIV prevention
Read about PEP and PrEP here
PEP and PrEP

My Instagram
Threads

Offline Kaz86

  • Standard
  • Member
  • Posts: 3
Re: Unprotected oral, protected sex and condom issue
« Reply #4 on: November 17, 2017, 06:29:06 am »
Hi, it's been awhile but this would be my final question. While I was sucking the lady's breasts I tasted something salty for a brief moment and I believe this could have been breast discharge. Now, I know breast milk/discharge is only a risk for babies that solely rely on their mothers' milk for nourishment, but since I have tooth decay (third molar, lower jaw) and ASSUMING the lady might be positive, would there be any chance or risk of getting infected? Thank you.

Offline Wade

  • Global Moderator
  • Member
  • Posts: 3,447
Re: Unprotected oral, protected sex and condom issue
« Reply #5 on: November 17, 2017, 07:52:58 am »
Another irrational fear, please stop worrying about things that most likely did not happen and were not risks to begin with.

Best, Wade
HIV 101 - Basics
 HIV 101
 You can read more about Transmission and Risks here:
 HIV Transmission and Risks
 You can read more about Testing here:
 HIV Testing
 You can read more about Treatment-as-Prevention (TasP) here:
 HIV TasP
 You can read more about HIV prevention here:
 HIV prevention
 You can read more about PEP and PrEP here
 PEP and PrEP

 


Terms of Membership for these forums
 

© 2024 Smart + Strong. All Rights Reserved.   terms of use and your privacy
Smart + Strong® is a registered trademark of CDM Publishing, LLC.